Of Cookies and Liminal Barriers
by ArcturusWolf
Summary: When a Khajiit Archmage experimenting with interplanar teleportation has an experiment go awry, she and her apprentice land in the world of Remnant. With the portal destabilised by a backlash in magickal energies, they find themselves stuck on Remnant for some time. Not everything goes as smooth as it should. For what can ever go smoothly with the Madgod watching?
1. 01 - One Does Not Simply Walk Into--

It seemed like a perfectly normal assignment from Headmaster Ozpin to Team RWBY. An unknown spike in energy in the middle of Emerald Forest that they needed to investigate and report on, destroying any Grimm that they may encounter in the process. Ruby was fairly certain that it was nothing, considering that the forest was one of the most frequently patrolled locations in Vale, owing to how close the forest was to Beacon Academy. Even Weiss, who was normally eager for every scrap of credit she could extract from teachers, seemed to be reluctant in going, feeling that it would be another waste of time that would earn little attention or reward from the staff.

"Come on, Weiss, it's not _that_ bad, is it?" Ruby said encouragingly to the white-haired heiress, who was currently lagging behind the rest of the team.

"We have just cleared this place of Grimm, and we found nothing. Absolutely nothing," she grumbled, "This is just a waste of time!"

It was Yang, however, who saw something rather odd about how her partner was behaving. Normally, Blake was one of the most calm and collected people that she had ever met. Nothing appeared to faze her in the least, and she walked with a self-assured, dignified gait that seemed to belong more on an apex predator than on a huntress-in-training. Today, however, she seemed to be reluctant in taking steps; and even stumbling for no apparent reason.

"Blakey, what's gotten into you?" Yang said, noticing that her partner stumbled on nothing more than a blade of grass for the umpteenth time that expedition. She swore she could see the bow on her partner's head twitch after that comment.

"N-nothing. I just...feel tired," she said unconvincingly. Her eyes were darting about as though there was some unseen threat in the area; something that she truly feared.

"You know, Blake, I've been around you long enough to know that you're hiding something," Weiss declared, stopping in her tracks to stare at the twitchy member of their team.

"No, it's really nothing," Blake replied, forcing her face straight again.

Yang and Weiss shared a look and shrugged. "If you're going to be like that, fine. Ruby, just how much further is this anomaly that we're supposed to be looking at?" Weiss grumbled, checking on Myrtenaster's Dust cartridges.

Ruby pursed her lips as she opened her scroll to check her current position. "According to the map, the coordinates that Headmaster Ozpin gave to us should be just up ahead,"

A large shadow fell upon them for a brief moment. Looking up, they saw an enormous black bird with a bone mask on its head.

A Nevermore. An absolutely enormous one at that; maybe the same size as the one that they had fought during their initiation. Headed in the same direction that they were going.

"Uh...guys? I'm not the only one that saw that...right?" Ruby chuckled weakly. When none of her teammates shook their heads, she jumped in excitement, "Finally! A Grimm to hunt down! Guys? You're with me, right? Guys?"

"Damn straight we are! Beats being bored all day long on a walk through a Grimm-not-infested forest," Yang cheered, unfolding Ember Celica and banging her fists together, "Let's go!"

They followed the shadow of the giant Nevermore; down through a half-broken cobble path, up a set of crumbling staircases, and through some thick brush. Eventually, however, they came to an open clearing in the middle of a forest.

A gigantic stone archway was in the middle of the clearing, placed inside a circle of smaller stone arches. A strangely glowing purple sphere was in the centre of the largest archway, which seemed to be releasing powerful bolts of dark energy every few seconds, scorching the stone around it. A pair of hooded figures were standing in front of the archway, with several large metal crates piled up behind them.

A loud caw heralded the Nevermore's arrival. With incredible speed, the giant avian Grimm lunged forward with its claws, trying to snatch up one of the two.

"Team! Let's go, those guys need our help!" Ruby yelled, unfolding her scythe and launching herself forward with several shots. Yang, Blake and Weiss followed suit, their sprint speeded up by Weiss' glyphs.

But what Ruby saw next made her question whether or not those people needed their help at all. One of the two hooded figures – one in a richly-decorated robe of red and gold and holding a staff – raised a hand lazily, causing a brilliant dome of blue to flash into existence from nothingness. The Nevermore squawked as it suddenly had to climb to avoid slamming into the barrier, tossing several of its projectile feathers as a parting gift.

Not that the feathers even remotely scratched the barrier; they merely fizzled into ash on contact with the dome. With the Nevermore now circling the air above them, the hooded figure lowered its hand and the barrier vanished without a trace. However, as it did so, the purple sphere of energy behind them exploded violently, releasing a shockwave that shattered every single archway in the clearing. The metal crates behind the two figures slid but a mere few feet, though both of the figures were thrown to the ground by the force of the explosion.

"Hold on, help is coming!" Ruby shouted, aiming Crescent Rose at the circling Nevermore and firing a few shots to distract it. Blake and Yang did likewise, while Weiss started to pelt it with bolts of energy from her Dust-covered rapier.

The one in the red and gold merely ignored the girls and looked up at the Nevermore as both of them stood up again. For a brief moment, it seemed as though it were doing nothing; and then a deafening female voice shattered the air with a thunderous roar.

" **YOL...TOOR SHUL!"**

The red-and-gold figure's hood was thrown backwards by the sheer force of the shout, revealing a feline face underneath the hood, with what appeared to be an ornate crown perched on top of its head. A blinding, white-hot jet of flame burst out of her mouth and high into the air, setting the Nevermore's wings ablaze just by being near it. With a panicked screech, the avian Grimm fell from the air, desperately flapping its wings in a vain attempt to put out the fires on its wings.

"What the hell was that?" Yang gasped, shaking her head to make sure she wasn't dreaming. A cat-faunus – if she even was one, considering that she seemed more feline than human – breathing out flames hot enough to burn an overgrown Nevermore out of the sky? Even if she was dead drunk she wouldn't have been able to imagine something like that.

Still, the Nevermore was now free-falling, unable to fly with most of its wing feathers burned away; directly on a collision course with the remains of the giant archway. The feline woman snarled and raised her staff; bolts of lightning shot out from the large red gemstone on its end and gathered in the palm of her other hand. Muttering some undecipherable words under her breath, glyphs started to burn into the stones on which she stood. A circle of power, inscribed with strange runes; each one glowing an ominous blood red.

"Begone, foul creature. I shall waste no more time on you," she snarled, lifting up her lightning-wreathed hand and pointing at the falling Nevermore.

Ruby watched in awe when a blinding flash erupted from the woman's outstretched hand. A bolt of energy streaked out from the tips of her fingers and struck the falling creature. A strong smell of burnt feathers and lightning-scorched air assaulted them as the Nevermore was simply erased from existence; only a cloud of embers and ash floated down from where it once was.

"Wow. I haven't seen anything like that before!" Ruby squealed in excitement, running over to the cat-woman. Before she could reach the woman, however, the second hooded figure reacted in a flash and held a blade seemingly made of lightning against her throat.

"Whoa, what's the big deal?" Yang said quickly, coming closer. The other hooded figure – the one with a black and silver robe – snarled as she approached; a second lightning weapon, this time a whip, materialised in its other hand, lashing out at Yang's feet in a warning, "Geez, alright, alright! I get it. You don't want us to come closer. But could you at least let my sister go?"

"This one thinks not. This one thinks that you need to show proper respect first,"

"That will suffice, J'Bari," the first one spoke calmly, "We are not in Imperial territory, it seems. As such, they are not my subjects, and are neither required nor expected to show obeisance. Dispel those weapons. I have little reason to believe that they possess hostile intent,"

Growling at Ruby, the hooded woman sighed in defeat. The lightning weapons in her hands vanished, and she bowed deeply to the one in the red-gold robes.

"This one offers her sincerest apologies, Your Majesty," she muttered, before turning to Ruby and Yang. "This one also offers you her apologies, but also wishes to remind you that this one takes her job most seriously. Any affront to Her Majesty will be dealt with swiftly,"

 _Her Majesty?_ Weiss thought, frowning. The faunus did not have a king or queen for as long as recorded history had been written on Remnant, though the gold-thread embroidery on that thick velvet and fur robe did lend some authority to the suggestion that this woman was some sort of royalty. As did the crown, of course, which seemed to have a single enormous ruby the size of a large egg displayed proudly above her forehead.

Blake, on the other hand, was having very, _very_ serious trouble controlling herself. The cat side of the faunus girl was demanding that she submit to the alpha female in front of her. There was something cold, something very dangerous about the white leopard-like female in front of her, and every instinct that she had demanded that she throw herself to her knees and grovel in submission. Something, it appears, that the alpha seemed to be well aware of, given the haughty smirk that she flashed in her direction, even as the cat faunus' knees trembled in indecision between kneeling and standing.

"Lower your hood, J'Bari. It is common courtesy that one looks into the eyes of those that she is talking to," the regal cat-woman said sternly to her underling, who promptly did so. "Now, I believe that it is proper etiquette to introduce oneself before engaging in any attempt at conversation. I am Empress Valeria Septim, the first of her name; High Queen of Skyrim, Empress of the Nirnian Empire, Archmage of the Arcane University. Whom do I have the pleasure of conversing with?"

Eyes of burning liquid gold bored into silver when Ruby opened her mouth to speak. Yet it seemed nothing could frighten the girl's endless enthusiasm into silence. "Hi! It's nice to meet you. I'm Ruby Rose!"

"A pleasure to make your acquaintance, Miss Rose. I must say that your attire is...unique," answered the Empress after a second, her eyes roving up and down the scythe-wielder's body. While she did not seem to mind the informal way that Ruby introduced herself, Weiss could swear that the grey tabby cat-woman's eyes twitched when she heard Ruby's improper introduction to her mistress.

Deciding that perhaps it was better to make a better first impression in the event that the cat was telling the truth, Weiss curtsied as she was instructed by her father. "It is a pleasure to meet you. My name is Weiss Schnee; daughter of...Jacques Schnee...and the current heiress to the Schnee Dust Company,"

"Ah, someone versed in proper courtly etiquette. It is pleasing to know that some things are constant across different worlds," Valeria said, smiling a little. Weiss fought back a shudder as she saw two of the cat-woman's fangs that were more akin to short combat knives than proper teeth, "Though I must admit, I am curious about why a...trade company...would be required to deal with dust. But that we may discuss at a later date, if circumstances permit. Who are your two other companions?"

"The one standing to my right, with blonde hair, is Yang Xiao Long. The one to my left is-"

"Blake Belladonna, milady," Blake blurted out despite herself. Her self control finally giving way, she fell to her knees and bowed down so low that she kissed the ground, much to Valeria's amusement - and the rest of Team RWBY's confusion.

"You may rise, Miss Belladonna," chuckled Valeria, "I am neither your liege nor your queen. Nor would I demand any of my subjects to bow in such a demeaning manner,"

"T-Thank you...?" Blake muttered uncertainly, slowly standing up.

"Now, let us put the previous unpleasantness aside," Valeria spoke, "I am curious as to why four young ladies like yourselves are out in the wilderness, carrying weapons no less,"

"Ozpin- I mean, _Headmaster_ Ozpin," Ruby said, correcting herself when she caught Weiss' glare, "Told us that there was an energy anomaly around here, and we were told to find out more about it. Killing any Grimm in the way, of course. But you did that before we could,"

A loud beeping came from the direction of J'Bari. There was a curious device on her wrist; a half-sphere of crystal, mounted on a silver bracelet. Many red flecks were floating inside it, which the feline was looking at with barely veiled fury. "Your Majesty, this one detect a large number of soul signatures coming in this direction. This one believes that they may be similar to the overgrown bird that we have killed,"

"Unfortunate. Do you have any exact readings on how many there are, and how far away they are?"

"No, Your Majesty, this one cannot tell," she replied slowly. The half-sphere started to fill up with more and more red, until it almost looked as though it had been painted over. "Though this one believes that there is an overwhelming number of them approaching. Perhaps in the hundreds...or even the thousands,"

Valeria raised an eyebrow when Ruby began to cheer in excitement. "More Grimm? Oooh, can we go hunt them?"

"I think calling Headmaster Ozpin for extraction is a better idea, Ruby," sighed Weiss, "We don't exactly carry enough ammunition or Dust to fight a whole army of Grimm, you know,"

"And I would prefer that my supplies and equipment are not destroyed," Valeria added, pointing at the metal crates behind her, "Or to put any lives at unnecessary risk. I assume that this headmaster that you speak of is the head of your...combat academy?"

"Yep. Close enough," Yang answered, "Rubes, I'm up for punching a few Grimm, but I think we can see what's the cause of that energy spike that Ozpin was talking about, and that's what we've been asked to find out about. Let's get out of here before we drown in Grimm,"

"Aww. Fine, fine! I'll call Ozpin. Geez," the red-cloaked girl grumbled, pouting as she pulled out her scroll and tapped the emergency extraction button. "He'll get a Bullhead to our position in a few minutes,"

"Very well. Miss Rose, if I could impose on you to lead us back to your Headmaster, I would be in your debt. I should very much like to discuss a few matters with him,"

* * *

When Ozpin heard about their discovery in the Emerald Forest, he did not know what to make of it. A portal, in the middle of some ruins in an uncharted part of the forest? Along with a pair of feline humanoids that were not faunus? If it were not for the cameras on the girls' scrolls, he would have dismissed their claims as being hallucinations brought about by fatigue. But they had brought back indisputable proof of what they saw, right in the same vehicle that they had escaped the forest in.

One of the cats – Khajiit, they called themselves – was noticeably shorter than the other, and carried herself with the bearing of an experienced bodyguard. There was the dull shine of metal armour underneath the thin black-and-silver robe that she wore, along with a narrow-bladed short sword concealed in her knee-length greaves. That one's fur was banded in shades of grey, with various scars littering her face and what was visible on her arms. Her green eyes were keen and ever watchful, glaring suspiciously at anyone that even came close to the other Khajiit.

"At ease, J'Bari. You may converse with these young ladies for a while. I wish to speak with Headmaster Ozpin,"

"As you wish, Your Majesty. This one shall comply," the one called J'Bari replied, saluting before she walked to stand beside Blake.

The other Khajiit walked up to him, her elegant predatory gait somewhat disrupted by the slight limp in her right leg. Unlike the other Khajiit, this one wore an extraordinarily luxurious robe; one that was richly embroidered with gold thread and trimmed with the finest white fur that he had ever seen. What drew his attention most was the staff that she was using to aid her movement. The large red crystal on top of the golden staff was radiating an obscenely powerful amount of power of some sort; he could feel its touch on his own Aura, radiant and almost uncomfortably hot.

"Alright. So this is Oz- I mean, _Headmaster_ Ozpin," Ruby said, pointing at Ozpin. "And that is Deputy Headmistress Goodwitch,"

"Greetings, Headmaster Ozpin, Deputy Goodwitch," Valeria spoke. Her voice came through as a rough rasp, much like J'Bari, "Firstly, I must apologise for intruding on your property and imposing on your hospitality on such short notice,"

He waved off her concerns and took a sip from his mug. "That's not a problem. You were stranded in the middle of the wilderness around the site of an energy anomaly. Hunters and huntresses must always be ready to save another's life,"

"I see. If that is true, then I must thank you for your support. If only we had met under better circumstances. Ah, but I digress. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Valeria Septim, the first of her name; High Queen of Skyrim, Empress of the Nirnian Empire – and the Archmage of the Arcane University of Cyrodiil. I am pleased to make your acquaintance, and hope to repay your hospitality someday,"

Ozpin raised an eyebrow. The level of formality in Valeria's speech suggested rather extensive experience in statecraft; to be expected, of course, if she was truly an empress. But an _Archmage_? Of an _Arcane University_? Magic was not something that was well known in Remnant, as only the four Maidens had the ability to perform what they knew as true magic. If she were the head of an educational institution devoted to the education of magic users, then perhaps she could enlighten them more on the nature of magic.

But for that, he needed some sort of proof. "We do as good huntsmen and huntresses should. However, I'm sorry, but I must say that magic is almost considered to be a mythical ability here in Remnant; your claim to being an Archmage is rather curious to our ears. Could I ask you to demonstrate some of it?"

She smiled in return. "A fair request. I shall indulge your curiosity," Valeria said. A sphere of purple flame burst into life above her free hand, which she hurled onto the ground. A burst of purple smoke flew out from the point of impact, before fading to reveal a ghostly silver wolf. Noticing Blake's discomfort on seeing the wolf, she silently willed the it to chase and lick the cat faunus,

Which, naturally, caused Blake to jump and run away in terror, climbing up a pillar in an effort to avoid being licked. Yang laughed at the absurd spectacle, while the wolf sat down and whined sadly. Ruby, on the other hand, squealed in delight and ran to the spectral wolf, throwing her arms around it.

"Wow, it's actually real!" she said happily, giving the wolf the best belly rub it would ever have while summoned, "Who's a good boy? You are! Yes you are!"

"Interesting," Ozpin commented. Tearing his gaze away from the summoned wolf, he looked at Valeria. "Is that some form of Semblance?"

"I must admit that I am not aware of any form of magic called a 'Semblance'," replied Valeria.

"It is...a unique ability to each and every creature with a soul. Tied to our Auras, if you will,"

"Hm. I do not believe that such abilities exist outside of my bloodline; that of the Dragonborns," Valeria hummed, scouring her mind for any other possible abilities that could fit the description, "If I may demonstrate, however... **FO KRAH DIIN!** "

A torrent of ice burst from her lips and onto the stone floor at her feet. Ozpin leant down and touched it for a brief moment, flinching when his fingers came away with a rather painful layer of frost on it.

"Most interesting. And you say that this...is only possible for your bloodline?" Ozpin murmured, rubbing away the frost between his fingers.

"That would be correct, yes. Unless, of course, you would count those who spend countless years learning how to replicate it by sheer force of will,"

"Hm. This is curious indeed. An ability that is not a Semblance, but is hereditary; and one that can apparently be taught. Well...Empress Septim-"

"Archmage, if you will. An educational institution should remain independent of any and all political meddling," interrupted the Khajiit, who wore a distinct frown on her face.

"Alright. Archmage Septim, as I was saying, you've satisfied my curiosity. If I may ask, why were you around the source of the energy spike in the middle of Emerald Forest?"

"Ah. That would be the interplanar portal that I had created," she muttered, rolling her staff absent-mindedly in her fingers, "I was seeking a new method of instantaneous long-distance travel. In theory, anchoring a single point of the portal to a fixed Aedric artifact should have allowed myself to place the other portal at a location of my choosing, and have it stable enough for repeated use,"

"And this portal – does it still work?"

"Unfortunately, no. When I was intending to slay a...Grimm...that your students called a 'Nevermore', it seems that the magickal feedback caused by my spellfire caused it to collapse," sighed Valeria, "As it stands, the portal on this end has collapsed. While I believe that eventually I should be able to reconnect it from this end, the key component required to maintain its stability is not in my possession,"

"A pity. I should have liked to see what the other side looked like," Ozpin said, taking another sip out of his mug, "Does that mean that you are unable to return for some time?"

"That would be...correct,"

"Glynda. Prepare a room for our guests," said Ozpin. The blonde deputy raised an eyebrow, but otherwise left to do as she was told, "I cannot leave either of you out in the open, as the wilderness is full of hostile Grimm. You may stay here for as long as you need, and you may have any food you need from our common facilities. However...if you would do myself a favour, it would be greatly appreciated,"

"Providing us with lodgings is a most gracious gesture as it stands," Valeria replied, smiling, "Speak, and I shall listen to your request. If it is within my abilities to grant, then I shall do so,"

"You said that you were the Archmage of an...Arcane University. Would I be correct in assuming that you are familiar with teaching magic?"

Valeria nodded earnestly. "Of course. Before I took up the mantle of High Queen and Empress, I regularly taught students of the arcane arts. I still do on occasion, however my duties often prevent myself from teaching much other than the most advanced of students. I cannot say the same of J'Bari, however, as she is currently my apprentice,"

"I see. Then if I may ask, would you like to teach our hunters and huntresses in training about magic? J'Bari is welcome to join a team and partake in classes to learn about what our huntsmen stand for and against, if she so wishes,"

"That would be acceptable, yes. A peaceful cultural exchange is the best sort, is it not?" Valeria replied, smiling widely as she offered a hand. Ozpin seized her hand and shook it firmly, much to J'Bari's horror.

"Your Majesty, this one must protest. This one's place is by your side, not-"

"I am more than capable of defending myself, J'Bari; you need not worry about my safety. You will find a team of students that you can at least tolerate, attach yourself to them, and learn as they do," commanded Valeria, in a tone that brooked no argument, "And yes, that means living as they do. You will not follow me around unless I demand it. Are your orders clear?"

"This one...must comply," the smaller Khajiit muttered, with no small amount of dislike in her voice. She hated being separated from her mistress. But if she must be separated, she would much prefer to remain with at least another Khajiit.

The howl of the conjured wolf caught her attention, and she grinned when she saw the cat Faunus still clinging on to a stone pillar, just out of reach of the wolf's licks. She wasn't a Khajiit, but the scent was close enough.

* * *

Elsewhere in the Planes of Oblivion...

"HASKILL! Where is my daughter?" cackled a laughing madgod.

"She has left Mundus, my lord," the madgod's butler answered in a dreary tone.

"Left? She has no right of way to do that! Or left of way. I'm not even sure which is which. But I was going to invite her to share in some cheesecake! Strawberry cheesecake! Who turns that down? Well, maybe a strawberry monster. Or a monster strawberry. Or a cheese wheel! Or a wheel with cheese on it. Their loss! Or maybe my gain. Do the two even need to be exclusive?"

"No, my lord,"

"OF COURSE THEY DON'T! But having more is always good, isn't it? Unless it's a dose of PAIN from those fools over in Dementia! But speaking of PAIN, this inability to share my cheese with my own daughter is starting to annoy me. And you don't want me to be annoyed, do you, Haskill?"

"Of course not, my lord. It would be most unwise to anger you,"

"Great! Then you know what to do. Find out where she is, and get me straight there. Or maybe pull her straight here. There's some cheesecake I want to share! And some cheese. And maybe a slice of cake? Oooh, and a juicy cabbage too, wrapped up in a ball of tasty, cheese-covered yarn!"

"Your will be done, my lord,"

Somewhere, someplace, a Khajiit Archmage felt a strange shiver run down her spine. It felt as though a wheel of cold cheese was running up and down her back ever so slowly, but she dismissed it as being a figment of her imagination.

* * *

A/N

Sheogorath! Cheese! Cabbages! YARN! MADNESS! What more could you want? -tentacled monstrosity bursts through Oblivion gate- NO, NOT YOU- GET OUT, MORA, YOU AREN'T INVITED!

This story was intended as a non-serious spinoff using the same universe as the ME/ES crossover that I have written, "Imperium Aeternit", set after the ending of that story before the Reaper invasions. More OCs are not expected to arrive as the portal is currently as broken as a politician's election promise, but there will be much interaction (indirect or direct, go figure the Madgod's interests) between the teams of Remnant and Sheogorath. After all, there's not much distinction between fun and madness!

Feel free to leave comments and questions for me. I'll try to get around to them when the next chapter rolls around.


	2. 02 - The First Lesson (Of Sanity)

"Hey, Rubes. Apparently we got a new class today. In like...five minutes," Yang said to her sister, tapping on her scroll's timetable.

"Ooh, another one, really...?" whined Ruby, pouting, "I don't think I can stand another one after Professor Port's class,"

"Well, it's a class. And that means we still have to go, whether you like it, or not," snapped Weiss, who pulled out her own scroll to check what it was, "Magic Theory and Application? And...taught by a 'V. Septim'?"

"Who's that?"

"The Khajiit woman that we brought back, you dolt. Didn't you pay attention to anything we did yesterday?"

"Ohh. Right, I remember now! Her weapon is soooo...cool..." Ruby said absent-mindedly, drooling when she remembered the fight in Emerald Forest. After a while, she shook herself free of her weapon-based fantasy and took a look around. "Hey, guys, did any of you see Blake? Like, since the morning?"

"Now that you mention it, I haven't seen her myself either," muttered Weiss, tapping her chin. "Did Ozpin call for her or something? I guess we'll see her at dinnertime. If not, we'll have to go and look for her,"

"Hmm. It still doesn't feel right, Team RWBY without Blake. Still, let's get to class! Can't be as bad as Professor Port's, right?"

When the team arrived at the classroom, they found Blake waving to them from the seats near the back. Beside them was the grey tabby Khajiit from yesterday; but instead of the black-and-silver robes that she had worn before, she was now wearing a Beacon Academy uniform. The other human students in the room that were already seated were also casting not-so-subtle curious and disgusted glances at the apparently new student, while those who were of Faunus descent seemed to be ill at ease around her.

"Uh, Blake? Why is she...sorry, I forgot your name,"

"This one is called J'Bari," the Khajiit next to Blake purred back. She was picking at the collar of the uniform, obviously uncomfortable with wearing a ribbon-tie along with a suit and skirt. Her narrow shortsword was strapped to her right thigh with what looked like a luggage strap, adding to the poor Khajiit's discomfort.

A suit and skirt. Weiss' eyes widened when she realised the implications of a cat-woman wearing a short skirt. Thankfully, when she looked down, J'Bari had enough sense to wear a pair of stockings under it, with her fluffy tail tightly curled about her waist. Who knew just how long it would take to remove all the cat fur stuck to the seat after she had sat on it? Or a better question was, how long would it take to remove the cat fur stuck to the clothes of whoever sat on the seat afterwards. For sure, however, she was not keen to find out. Putting her clothes in the wash with Blake's ribbon in the same load had already proven just how difficult it was to remove a small amount of cat fur.

"Why weren't you in class earlier? We were worried about you!" Ruby asked Blake, taking a seat next to J'Bari.

"I was busy fitting a uniform to J'Bari, and taking her through all the facilities of the school," sighed Blake, "That, and Dr. Oobleck pulled us aside to have a 'little' chat about J'Bari's homeworld,"

"Yep, Blakey, say no more. I think we know just how long that took," Yang laughed, "Fifty lien says that it took half the day,"

"This one believes that Miss Yang is correct," J'Bari grumbled, her ears flicking in irritation, "This one thinks that Dr. Oobleck talks too much. If he wanted a summary of J'Bari's homeworld, Her Majesty's library has many books on the subject. J'Bari is an apprentice mage, not a historian,"

A red-headed girl on the seat in front of their turned around when she heard that. "Oh wow, really? An apprentice mage? Can you show us something?" she said excitedly. On seeing the Khajiit's unreadable expression, she let out a small 'eep' and blushed. "Sorry, I couldn't help overhearing your conversation. I'm Pyrrha. Pyrrha Nikos,"

"This one is...pleased to make your acquaintance, Miss Nikos. Khajiit is called J'Bari,"

"Please, just Pyrrha will do,"

"Alright. This one shall call you Pyrrha from now on. This one thinks that this one can show a small amount of magic, yes,"

Holding out her hand and furrowing her brows in concentration, J'Bari reached out into Aetherius and conjured a long, narrow sabre. The ghostly blade seemed to be winking in and out of existence, like a translucent flame that was somehow solid and not at the same time.

"A sword that is bound to my will," she said, placing the weapon down on the table. Ruby gasped and reached out to touch it, flinching when she touched the sabre's edge.

"Ouch!" the girl yelped, sucking on her finger. A small amount of blood was on the edge of the blade. "It's really, really, _really_ sharp!"

"So...it's real?" Pyrrha murmured, looking over the ghostly weapon. When she picked it up by the handle, however, it vanished in a puff of purple smoke. "Wait, what? It was just here!"

"This one must admit, the School of Conjuration is not her strength," J'Bari said sheepishly, rubbing the back of her head, "J'Bari can only bind the weapon to reality for only half a minute at best. Miss Ruby, Khajiit does not believe that sucking on an open wound is the brightest of ideas, unless one were a night-walker. Khajiit will heal, as Khajiit caused the injury,"

A soft golden light formed in J'Bari's hand, and as she passed it over the cut on Ruby's finger, it vanished without a trace.

"Thanks!" Ruby said, throwing her arms around J'Bari in a hug. The Khajiit purred in response, rubbing her forehead against Ruby's own. "Hey, that tickles!"

"So...as fun as this is, wasn't there supposed to be a class here today?" Pyrrha asked, looking to the empty stage in front of the class, "I don't think I've ever seen or heard of...Professor Septim? Or is it Dr. Septim? The name doesn't really sound like any from any of the kingdoms,"

As if on cue, a gash in reality formed on the stage; a purple sphere that gradually expanded from a single point, seemingly bending and devouring light as it grew. Students gasped as Valeria stepped out from the rift, dusting off her robes as though nothing major had happened. With a click of her fingers, the rift collapsed, leaving wisps of purple sparks behind. She then surveyed the class with her sharp eyes, smiling a little when she caught the sight of J'Bari being hugged by Ruby.

"Apprentice J'Bari, please assume your seat properly. Miss Rose, I would much prefer to have my apprentice alive, and not be deprived of air, thank you," she said, causing those near Ruby to laugh. Clearing her throat, she slowly walked to the centre of the stage. "I suppose introductions are in order. I am Archmage Valeria Septim; you may refer to me as Archmage Septim. If you are present in my class, then I assume that you are training to become...hunters and huntresses. The defenders of the people. Please correct me if I am mistaken,"

"Yeah, people. Humans. Not filthy Faunus!" she heard coming from one of the boys at one of the lower desks. Cardin Winchester, if the nametag was correct.

"Defenders of the people it is, then. While the other classes taught in this academy prepare you for physical confrontations or the history of this world, my class shall teach you how to conduct battle with the mind. Reality shifts in accordance to our will-" she clenched her fist and formed a long, snakelike whip of icy flame, drawing gasps of disbelief from the class, "-it yields to our convictions-" she lashed out at the boy who had made a comment about Faunus, who screamed in terror and fell over backwards, even though the whip barely threw even a single ember onto his clothes, "-And most importantly, it is ours to be moulded as we see fit. You there, boy. Do not think that I cannot feel your rage and hatred. Sit back down and behave yourself. I will not be as lenient next time,"

Cardin picked himself up, glaring back at Valeria. She returned his gaze with a cold stare of her own, noting that perhaps she needed to discipline the boy rather quickly indeed.

"Yes, Miss Rose?" Valeria asked, noting that the black-clad girl had raised a hand.

"Will you show us how to do that? That was _so awesome_!"

"One must crawl the earth before walking upon it, child. Perhaps in time you will, if you put your mind to the lessons I am about to teach. Now, as I was about to say; the practice of the magickal arts allows us to bend and shape reality as we see fit. Fire, frost and lightning flow from our fingertips; mortal wounds fade and heal as though they are mere scratches; and creatures from other planes are ours to command. The applications are nearly limitless, bound only by the imagination and the will of the caster,"

Gathering purple flames in her hand, Valeria summoned nine Familiars in quick succession. The pack of translucent wolves sat in a neat line in front of her, their heads held high in attention.

"Big deal, ghost wolves. I bet they can't even do anything to me!" she heard Cardin scoff.

"Mr. Winchester, though I am old, I assure you that my hearing is sharp enough to hear that. Would you care to prove your words, or are you too craven to stand behind them?"

"I don't need to listen to this crap! All you need to win a fight is a good weapon!" he snarled. Blake and Ruby struggled to hold J'Bari in her seat; she was snarling and ready to leap at the boy for insulting her mistress.

"Apprentice, stand down," ordered Valeria. J'Bari reluctantly fell back into her seat, still glowering at Cardin. Turning to the arrogant boy, Valeria smiled, lazily lifting a hand. "I hope that you are ready to defend your words, boy. Let us see if your bark matches your bite,"

A purple cloud enveloped Cardin, and before he blinked he found himself on the stage beside Valeria. All of the nine familiars on the stage turned to face him, their bodies lowered to pounce at the slightest sign of weakness. At this distance, even he had to shiver in fear. Their fangs looked much, _much_ sharper than from back there, and much more real, too.

"If you are so certain that these familiars of mine are unable to hurt you, then surely you will be most capable of defending yourself. Go ahead, my familiars. Feast," the archmage laughed, taking a step back.

Cardin gulped when the wolves all began to prowl around him in a wide circle. "Help?" he mouthed to the other students, who simply shrugged and leaned back in their seats.

Let it be said that Jaune, from that day onward, did not hold the title of having the 'loudest, highest-pitched male scream' in Beacon Academy. That title properly belonged to one Cardin Winchester, after a certain vindictive archmage had decided to teach him a proper lesson in respect.

* * *

"Team CRDL, please take your leader to the infirmary," Valeria said. She snapped her fingers and the ethereal wolves stepped back from the whimpering Cardin, now well and truly chastised with numerous small bites all over him and his clothes thoroughly ripped all over; there was even a conspicuous wet patch between his legs. Another wave of her hand and the wolves were banished from existence. Reluctantly, Dove and Russel stood up to collect their teammate, disappearing out the door as quickly as they could.

"Now then. I suppose I have made my point abundantly clear by now. Magic is very much real, and an extremely powerful force at that. It takes a supremely disciplined mind to maintain and shape the energy necessary to wield spells at a moment's notice. Without sufficient control and discipline, you will find that magic can backfire upon its user. A fireball intended for an enemy may ricochet back at its caster; a summoned creature may turn on its conjurer; and a barrier may fail when you need it most. For this reason, I will not tolerate skylarking in my classes. Failure to adhere to my rules will see you punished in the same way that Mr. Winchester has already been subjected to. Do I make myself clear, students?"

"Yes, Archmage,"

"Hm. There appears to be a few questions that you wish to ask. Yes, Miss Nikos?"

"Um...How does someone learn how to cast? So far, we've seen a display of...conjuration? Is that the right word for it?"

"Yes, that would be correct. As for learning how to cast, that will not be for today. I shall only be explaining the basics of the magickal arts, and the seven schools of magic, so that you will all be aware of the specialisations that one may undertake. I shall activate your magickal reserves in tomorrow's class. Yes, Miss Schnee?"

"You said that there are seven schools of magic. What are those?"

Valeria hummed, stroking her chin in thought. "The seven schools...perhaps it would be best to demonstrate them. This will be important to all of you, so please, do listen. Could I have a volunteer, please?"

Hands shot up all over the classroom. Smiling, Valeria beckoned to Weiss; the white-haired girl vanished in a cloud of purple smoke, reappearing beside Valeria.

"As eager as all of you are, I believe it would only be fair to demonstrate the schools of magic with the aid of the one that asked for clarification. Miss Schnee, please hold out your hand; palm upwards, fingers out,"

Feeling a little foolish, Weiss held out one hand as she was requested to do. Valeria snapped her fingers and a ghostly greatsword manifested itself above Weiss' hand.

"Conjuration," Valeria spoke loudly with a theatrical bow, letting Weiss grasp the weapon. She gasped when she lifted it effortlessly with one hand; then swinging it around with a wide grin on her face. Ruby pouted enviously, wishing that she could've been the one that got picked for the demonstration. "Tell me, Miss Schnee; how does the bound greatsword feel in your hands?"

"It feels weightless, as though I'm holding something feather-light in my hands!" she replied excitedly, thrusting the large weapon with one hand like a rapier.

"Precisely. Conjuration is the art of binding extraplanar objects using your will. Whether weapons or armour, these do not physically exist on the material plane, and yet they may interact as though they were solid objects. They are, for all intents and purposes, weightless. You have all seen myself conjure some wolf familiars, which had proven too much for a certain member of our class. But those are the least dangerous of the creatures that experienced mages can summon,"

She pointed at the ground to her left; a dark portal flashed into existence, through which a feminine creature, seemingly made of living flames, skipped out and into the classroom with all the grace of a dancing ice-skater. Another creature followed after it, resembling a hulking mountain of animated ice, with fists the size of a desk. With another snap of her fingers, the two began to fight; the flaming creature hurling fireballs, and the ice one pummelling away using its great fists of ice. Eventually, however, the ice one managed to punch the flaming one squarely on its chin, sending the creature straight into the ceiling, where it vanished into a pile of reddish ashes.

"The next. Restoration. Miss Schnee, would you care to fight this Ice Atronach? I assure you that no harm will come to you by the end of the fight,"

"O-okay?" she replied nervously, lifting up the conjured greatsword as she would Myrtenaster. The 'Ice Atronach' lumbered over towards her, seemingly unconcerned; narrowing her eyes, the heiress lunged using a glyph to propel her forwards, thrusting the greatsword with all her might into the centre of the atronach. The blade pierced the creature through its midsection, causing it to grunt and roar in pain; but after only a second, it brought its fist down upon Weiss, smashing into her chest and sending her flying into the wall on the other side of the classroom with a resounding _crack_. The gathered students let out a loud 'ooh', wincing, when they saw what had happened.

"Looks like there are some iceblocks that even our Snow Princess can't handle," Yang joked, while Ruby and Blake looked horrified at what happened to their teammate.

"My arm!" Weiss shrieked in agony. Her left arm looked as though it had broken in several places on impact; it was now dangling uselessly at her side. Both the atronach and the greatsword had vanished, and Valeria was now calmly standing over her, with a blindingly bright golden light in her free hand. A wave of relief washed over the heiress when the archmage released the ball of light above her; in seconds, she felt the bones of her arm knit back together painlessly.

"I would ask you to refrain from giving me that look, Miss Schnee," Valeria said apologetically, noticing the death glare that Weiss was giving her, "I did say that you would be unharmed by the _end_ of the fight, and you are currently no worse off than you were at the start of the admittedly brief fight,"

"You could've warned me first!" she retorted, fuming, as she turned to head back to her seat.

"Yes. Yes, I possibly should have, but did not. Thank you anyway, Miss Schnee. Your help with the demonstration was...most appreciated. Now, for the next one. The School of Alteration. This allows us to modify the physical universe in any way we see fit. Tell me, then; who in this class believes that they have the sharpest, hardest bladed weapon?"

Ruby's hand immediately shot up, hoping that the next demonstration would be interesting. J'Bari shot her a subtle glare, shaking her head in the hope that the girl would catch it. Which, unfortunately for her, she did not.

"Miss Rose! Please, come down," Valeria said, snapping her fingers. Like Weiss, Ruby now appeared on the stage, with Crescent Rose at her hip, "Now, I would ask you to tell me about your weapon,"

Bad decision. A very, _very_ bad decision. One that she would regret as possibly being one of the worst decisions she had made since accepting to eat 'some' strawberry torte with a certain Madgod. The ancient vampire's eyes almost glazed over when the girl began to rattle off every little bit of detail about her weapon at supersonic speeds. Only Yang seemed unaffected by her little sister's explanations, having heard it _so many times_ in the past; the rest of the class had also been stunned into a stupor.

"While this is most fascinating, Miss Rose, I must stop you there for now," Valeria interrupted her, dearly hoping that she would not engage in such a lengthy speech ever again. She muttered a few words under her breath; a vibrant green glow encased her body in what looked almost like a force field. She held out one finger to the side. "I wish for you to strike my finger with the blade of your weapon. As hard as you can,"

Knowing that J'Bari was the Empress' bodyguard, Ruby looked at the apprentice for advice. To her surprise, the Khajiit simply shrugged, motioning for her to strike as asked. Nervously, Ruby hefted her scythe and swung at the woman's finger-

 _Clang._

Only for the blade of Crescent Rose to stop on impact. She gaped in shock when she lifted it away, revealing that there was a finger-shaped chip on the weapon's blade.

"What...?" Ruby whispered, bringing down the scythe to eye level and looking in disbelief at the chip on it. It was as though she had just smashed it into _metal_. Sniffing sadly, she looked up at Valeria with tears in her eyes. "You damaged Crescent Rose! How could you!?"

"Ebonyflesh. Turning part or all of one's body into a nearly indestructible metal," she announced, bowing her head to the upset huntress to her side, "Miss Rose, I do apologise for damaging your weapon. Come see me after class and I shall see if I can help with repairs. We are, however, running short on time-" she checked the scroll on her hip, "-and therefore, I will need the help of my apprentice to demonstrate the last school of magic, as this is perhaps the most dangerous of all the schools. J'Bari, please step forward,"

"As you command, Your Majesty," she declared, standing up and marching to the front of the class, giving a standard Legion salute and standing at attention.

"I know for certain that you have had urges to practice your destruction magic for some time. So, as a reward for your patience, I shall be your sparring partner for today," Valeria said, grinning as she noticed her apprentice's ears perk up, "You may let loose on my shields. Everything you know, with as much force as you desire,"

Without another word, J'Bari stepped back in a combat pose. Two elemental whips appeared in her hands; one a blue, icy flame, and the other one of intense lightning. The archmage herself planted her staff in front of her, projecting a radiant blue shield. The first blow of the lightning whip sent a thunderous blast echoing through the classroom; the following strike of the flaming one carved a burning streak in the floor below as it bounced away from the shield and onto the stone tiles below.

The strikes accelerated in pace, blow after blow raining on the shield. It grew so rapid that eventually it looked as though there was a sphere of fire and lightning where the younger Khajiit once stood, scattering a torrent of sparks, frost and embers from where it contacted the shield. Eventually, however, J'Bari stopped, panting with a wide, toothy grin on her face.

"And that is the School of Destruction," Valeria commented, letting the shield vanish, "Had I not been using a shield, I would most likely be a pile of ashes by now. This is the most destructive school of magic, and also one of the most demanding on both the body and the mind. But as much as I would love to continue to speak about the schools of magic, it appears that we are out of time. If you are interested in learning about the other schools of magic; namely, Illusion, Enchantment and Alchemy, feel free to speak to me after class. For tomorrow, I would ask you all to think about which school of magic you would like to specialise in,"

A hand shot up from the back of the room. "I suppose I can answer one more question if it is brief. Yes, Miss Rose?"

"Can you conjure a cookie?"

* * *

Later, in the Shivering Isles...

"HASKILL! Have you found her yet?"

"If, my lord, you meant the Duchess of Mania, who has borrowed your Fork, no. She still seeks for a spoon to match the Fork,"

"No, not THAT woman, you dunce! Only I can be the dunce! Because what's more stupid than a madman? Or a madwoman? Ha! Got you! I'm an Oblivion-certified genius! Because madness IS genius! It's also inspiration,"

"Very insightful, my lord,"

"I meant my daughter. You know, the one with a stick up her butt. A breadstick. Or was it a toffee stick? Or a hockey stick? Hockey rhymes with rocky. Must be a hockey stick, because my daughter is totally a rock person,"

"If you had asked for your daughter, my lord, I have known for the last twelve hours,"

"Oh! Snark, is it that I hear, Haskill? I should tear your intestines out. And skip rope with them! Good fun, wouldn't you say? But really. Where has my daughter gone?"

Haskill sighed. Some days, dealing with his lord could be _so_ draining. "She is currently in another realm. Not of Oblivion, but not in Mundus,"

"Really now? Are you mad? Of course you're not mad, because I'M the MADGOD! And you're most definitely not MAD, because I don't smell madness on you! And certainly I don't smell ME on YOU! What is she doing? Is she doing her normal, boring, BORING ruler-y things?"

"Truthfully, she is not. She is...teaching. Teaching magic to some students on another plane. And currently trying her hardest to conjure an edible baked sugary treat for one of her students. And as much as it would please you, failing to do so,"

"My daughter? Conjuring _treats_? Has she finally embraced my own teachings? No, that can't be right. Only I embrace my own teaching! Like I love myself. I love myself. Do you know that, Haskill? I truly, really, deeply DO LOVE MYSELF! More than anyone else. But maybe, just maybe, I should give my daughter a visit in person. Give her a conjured cookie to show that I can love someone. Or maybe a dozen. Or maybe drown her in all the baked, sugary treats that she could ever wish for!"

Haskill sighed again. This was going to be a long, long day.

* * *

A/N

Buzzsaw935: It's Jacques. Sounds vaguely similar to Chuck when spoken, but it's definitely different. Check the RWBY wiki if you need to confirm.

Indecisive Bob: Yep, it's difficult to be worse than magic users that are totally and utterly untrained. :P

Mangahero18: Oh, trust me, that's only going to be the start of it :P And you know how vindictive ancient vampires can be. And let's not forget the age-old adage, "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned".

TheBSDude: Yeah, this is a bit of a sticking point here when blending the two universes together. In the ES/ME universe of my other story, the Geth are considered to have souls by the virtue of 'everything that is capable of free will has a soul', even if it's only in limited amounts. By this logic, the Grimm have souls – just not in the same way that the rest of Remnant knows it. Grimm souls have null potential, therefore making them utterly useless for enchanting – and in the case of Remnant, have no Aura. It's like they have a blank soul, which is there but has nothing on it.

Ultima-owner: Weaponising cheese? I would not put it past the Madgod. After all, the only difference between genius and madness is that a genius has a specific direction. *quietly kicks the bucket of molten cheese hanging over a gatehouse* Heh...heh...yeah, no, it's not weaponised just yet...But let us say that Sheogorath does approve of the idea of weaponising food...in a fight. Oh god. I just realised how nasty that would be. Sticky, melty, superheated cheese instead of boiling oil in a medieval siege... *shudder* It's like non-incendiary medieval napalm. Try getting hot mozzarella off your hands when you accidentally get some on you D:

TheReaperOfGods: Wabbajack. Wabbajack. Maybe the Wabbajack is the Book of Knowledge. Maybe I'm smarter because I know cats can be bats can be rats can be hats can be gnats can be that's can be thises. Maybe it's already in this story, and we just don't know it. Wabbajack. Wabbajack. Wabbajack. -pauses- ...Sheogorath, get out of my head. Please? D:

As usual, please feel free to leave comments and reviews. I will try to get around to them by the time the next chapter rolls around. Until next time, my cheese wheels!

A/N2:

Reuploaded due to serverside derp which removed the uploaded chapter.


	3. 03 - Activation Required

"So, Rubes, you picked a school of magic yet?" Yang asked, leaning against the wall in front of the magic classroom. Her sister shook her head in response, bouncing up and down in excitement.

"Nope. Not yet. They're all so...useful!" Ruby squealed excitedly, "Destruction looks really fun to use. Boom. Blam. Kapow!" she said, making gestures mimicking explosions.

"But you already have Crescent Rose for blowing things up, don't you?" Weiss pointed out, "If you use magic, you aren't going to be using your 'sweetheart' for anything,"

"Nonsense," J'Bari said, drawing the shortsword on her thigh. Running a finger along its edge, she coated the entire blade in blue flames. "With practice, one can combine the destructive arts with swordplay. It is a common discipline in the Imperial Legion,"

Ruby looked at the blade with excitement; though when she reached out to touch the flaming blade, J'Bari batted her hand away with a stern glare. "Ow! What was that for?" she cried out. Noticing that the flames were now extinguished and the sword was back in its sheath, she pouted disappointedly.

"Keep hands away from sharp objects. Especially flaming ones," J'Bari growled, remembering the previous day's incident with the bound sword. A small cut was easy enough to heal; one that was on fire was _slightly_ more difficult to heal.

"Hey, J'Bari, I haven't asked you before 'cause...well, you were somewhere else with Blake pretty much all of yesterday," Yang said, "I keep hearing about this 'Imperial Legion' from you. You don't look that old to be a soldier. What's the deal with that?"

"J'Bari assures Yang that she is old enough to be a soldier," huffed J'Bari, her ears flicking, "This one is twenty winters old, and has been in service for eight summers,"

"Whoa, whoa. Your military lets _children_ in it?"

"Khajiit does not understand. Khajiit is considered an adult at eleven winters," she replied, tilting her head in confusion, "Suthay-Khajiit grow faster than humans, and faster than even Cathay-Raht Khajiit,"

"What's a...South Khajiit?" Ruby asked, the strange word difficult to pronounce for her. J'Bari merely pointed at herself in response.

"Khajiit have sixteen breeds. Seventeen, if one would include the Mane, but the Mane is simply unique. Suthay-Khajiit are small and walk on two legs. Suthay-Khajiit grow faster than others, and are ready to work much faster. Her Majesty is a Cathay-raht Khajiit, which is the largest form of two-legged Khajiit. J'Bari would be an adult at eleven winters, while Her Majesty would be an adult at twenty winters,"

"Okay, that hardly makes any sense," Yang muttered, scratching her head, "So you guys have...different ages to be considered an adult? That's just confusing,"

"This one thinks that human customs are confusing at times as well, but Khajiit perseveres,"

"How long exactly have you been practicing magic?" queried Weiss. The speed at which the cat-woman was flinging attacks from both hands against Archmage Septim was incredible; and she did not miss a single time. Granted, the shield that the archmage had cast was large, but every strike landed on target.

"Khajiit was trained from a young age. Maybe five winters old. That would make Khajiit a magic-user for fifteen winters. Khajiit still has much to learn, as Khajiit is still not considered a master in destruction yet,"

"Fifteen years?" groaned Ruby, "I can't wait that long! Isn't there a faster way to learn?"

"Fastest way to learn is to use it every day," J'Bari replied. Her ears shrank backwards and she muttered, "This one is ashamed to admit it, but J'Bari was lazy before she was hand-picked by Her Majesty. J'Bari believes that Ruby should be good at it in a winter or two, if she does not forget to use it,"

"If after fifteen years you aren't even a master yet..." Weiss muttered thoughtfully, "Hey, I never asked. Does that mean that Archmage Septim is a Master of Destruction?"

J'Bari nodded. "Her Majesty is a master of all seven schools of magic. She may teach any school, but this one is aware that she prefers teaching Destruction,"

"All seven schools?" mouthed Ruby, "If it takes more than fifteen years to become a master of _one_...how old _is_ she? She doesn't look _that_ old? I mean, she doesn't even have any...grey hairs?"

Weiss glared pointedly at Ruby. "Well, thank you for insulting me about my age, _partner_ ," she huffed in annoyance. Blake, Yang and even J'Bari giggled, while Ruby apologised profusely to an upset Weiss.

"This one must admit...she does not know Her Majesty's exact age," J'Bari finally said, recovering from her laughter, "This one's grandsire, and his grandsire too, remembers her as being the Empress of the Nirnian Empire. This one has heard rumours that she was born in the dying days of the Third Era,"

"That doesn't sound familiar to us at all. How long ago is that?" Blake asked.

"Perhaps...sixteen hundred winters ago?"

Team RWBY gawked at her. "Did this one say something offensive?"

"That's absurd!" Weiss said, looking in the direction of the door, "So she's been around longer than even any of the kingdoms of Remnant have existed? How does she stay alive for that long!?"

Realising that perhaps she had said too much, J'Bari immediately regretted even opening her mouth. "Perhaps this one can say, if Her Majesty permits me to do so,"

Thankfully for the younger Khajiit, the barrier leading into the classroom flashed once and then faded out of existence. The door flew open, revealing a bright blue glow coming from inside, even when all the lights in the room were off.

"Ooh, pretty lights," Ruby gasped when she walked through the door, looking at a circle of glowing silver runes in the middle of the stage. In the centre of the rune circle was a large stone basin with a bubbling blue liquid inside it. On a table behind the archmage was a single crystal chalice, along with a large pile of black-bound tomes. The only source of light in the room other than the strange liquid was a ball of light floating above the archmage's head.

"Apologies for the delay with starting this class, but I do certainly hope that everyone is here today," Valeria called out to the class as the students filed in.

"What's cooking, Archmage Septim?" asked Yang from the back of the class.

"Oh, not much. Only a potion that will activate your magickal abilities," she said lightly. Then without a warning, she glared at the door, which slammed shut behind the last person that walked in. "...And it is a most difficult one to prepare. I will not be repeating this, as it has taken myself a full sixteen hours of work to produce. If anyone in this class is absent, then they may assume that I will assign them a failing grade. For the _entire_ course," she growled menacingly; the ball of light above her head lowered slowly in front, casting a growing, threatening shadow on the curtains behind her.

The entire class gasped. Failing the entire course, for not showing up to a single class? Pyrrha looked nervously to her left. Jaune was notably absent from his seat. Failing a class would not look very good on his transcript. Which, truth be told, would be better off avoiding an examination from _any_ teacher at any cost. "Um...Archmage?"

"Is something the matter, Miss Nikos?" she asked. The ball of light in front of her returned to its normal position, and her voice returned to its usual formal tone.

"Uh...I think I saw Jaune earlier outside this class, but he hasn't come in yet,"

When Valeria looked at the empty seat beside Pyrrha, she sighed. **"Laas Yah Nir,"**

Her eyes glowed red for a brief moment, and she looked at the wall next to the door. "Yes, I can see Mr. Arc. And it appears that Mr. Winchester's entire team is with him. Restraining him, by the looks of it, against what appears to be...a potted plant,"

"Oh, no," Pyrrha groaned, "Can I...go help him?"

"Ooh, can I join in?" Nora chimed in, raising her hammer above her head. Yang also cracked her knuckles and looked at Valeria for approval.

"As admirable as this display of loyalty is, I do not believe my lesson to Mr. Winchester has been made clear enough on the previous day," sighed Valeria. A mischievous smile crept onto her lips, however, as a stroke of inspiration came to her mind. "Now, who wishes to see a display of...conjuration? Before this class begins?"

"Ooh, me!" Ruby cried out gleefully, echoed by numerous other people in the class. Rubbing her hands together, Valeria gathered a ball of purple flame in each hand. Purple smoke burst out from the floor where she threw the flames, causing a few people on the front seats to groan in disgust when the smell of rotten eggs reached their noses. Two tall, muscular humanoids appeared when the smoke cleared; each one clad in a nightmarish suit of red and black spiked armour. In their hands were greatswords almost as tall as they were. If the wolves that had been summoned in class yesterday were adorable when being friendly, these two summoned soldiers utterly radiated _terror_.

"You two. Dremora markynaz," she spoke imperiously to the two humanoids, as if she were addressing a mere servant. Stiffly, they turned around and bowed to her, grumbling angrily all the while. "You are bound to my will, and must follow my every whim. Obey,"

"Yes, mistress. Your wish is my command," they responded in a flat drone, their eyes glazed over by some powerful compulsion.

"Fortunately for you, I have...a problem that I wish dealt with. It will involve vanquishing a knave or two,"

"Wait, you aren't seriously thinking of setting... _those_ guys on Cardin, are you?" Yang asked, looking as if Christmas had come early. When Valeria winked in response, she cheered and shouted, "Oh, _Dust_! You _are_ actually doing this!? Can I record this on my scroll?"

"Witness our physical superiority, mortal fools! You may of course-"

"Silence, churl. You will remain silent inside this classroom unless I say otherwise. And Miss Xiao Long; no, you may not record this event on your device. You are in class, and you will remain in this room unless you wish to join Mr. Winchester. But you _may_ listen to the event, if you so wish. After all, I do believe that many of your classmates also wish to do so. I will allow this lapse in discipline, just this once,"

True to her words, many of Yang's other classmates were already pressed up against one wall of the classroom, intently listening to whatever was happening outside. Particularly those that were of faunus heritage, who were clambering over each other to be the closest to the wall. The dremora, realising what they were about to be ordered to do, immediately flashed each other evil grins and bowed to the archmage in supplication.

"You aren't going to...injure them, are you?" Pyrrha asked uncertainly, shifting in her seat. As much as she detested the way that CRDL abused faunus, throwing enemies at them with real, deadly weapons was much more than she would have been comfortable with.

"Well, after what Miss Rose asked me last class about conjuring a certain baked, sugar-filled treat..." she replied in a mocking tone, "...No, they will _not_ be permanently incapacitated. Dremora, you will not need those weapons of yours today. There is something more...appropriate for punishment,"

The two demonic knights' shoulders slumped in disappointment when their greatswords vanished in a puff of orange smoke. Instead, they found in their hands elongated chocolate chip 'cookies' that resembled an overcooked breadstick, liberally studded with inch-long studs of chocolate, with a crossguard made of a long, thick stick of glossy brown chocolate. They looked curiously at the weapons; one of them tried to bite the end of a cookie, groaning in pain when a few chips of broken teeth fell out of his mouth. The other wisely treated his ersatz weapon with much more respect immediately after.

"These weapons will perform admirably for your tasks. There is a blonde boy outside this classroom, being accosted by a group of unruly youths. I require you to instill in these youths some discipline without killing them. When you believe that you have done enough, bring the blonde boy back into this classroom so that we can resume our lessons. And the youths as well,"

"Your will be done...mistress,"

"Splendid. Now go, and do not return until your task is completed,"

Turning back to her class, she looked at Ruby's nonplussed face and chuckled. "Well, Miss Rose; you have asked yesterday if I could conjure a cookie. The answer lies before your eyes, though I assure you that anything out of the kitchens of any Plane of Oblivion is most certainly _not_ edible. Not without a large bowl of milk to drown it in, at least. Or a bucketful of milk,"

Outside the classroom, deep, echoing roars of "I SMELL WEAKNESS!" and "A CHALLENGER IS NEAR!" could be heard, followed by a number of high-pitched squeals and blunt impacts of something doughy colliding against metallic armour and leather. A pot plant or two broke free of their containers, courtesy of a body slamming into it; and judging by the way the walls of the classroom trembled, someone had been smacked quite hard against a wall. A few of the students cringed when they heard a particularly sonorous _crack,_ akin to a gigantic piece of hard, dry bread snapping against something equally hard, echo through the wall.

Eventually, the sounds of the strangest battle ever fought in Remnant stopped. They could hear heavy footsteps coming back towards the door.

"No match at all," declared one of the dremora, who had returned with a shaken Jaune in tow – and a pair of decidedly battered and cracked cookie-greatswords in hand. The other carried in four unconscious youths liberally covered in bruises and whimpering in agony. Their hair was coated in crumbs of broken cookie and bits of fragmented chocolate studs. The dremora carrying Team CRDL dumped them unceremoniously in front of the stage.

"You have done adequately well. Go on, then; return to the Shivering Isles. Send Sheogorath my regards," Valeria chuckled, banishing the two dremora and their weapons with a wave of her hand.

"The cookie-weapons..." Ruby moaned, collapsing on her desk when she just watched the two largest, weapon-shaped cookies in all of Remnant vanish before her eyes. It was a dream come true for her; two of her most favourite things in the world, combined, disappearing before she could so much as touch it.

"Very well, everyone. You have had enough entertainment for the start of this lesson. Please resume your seats. Mr. Arc, do you require any healing?"

"No, I'm good," he gasped, limping over to Pyrrha's side. J'Bari cast a silent healing spell on him once he sat down, fixing what looked like more than a few bruises under his armour.

"If you insist. Now, Mr. Winchester, and the rest of Team CRDL-" Valeria growled; her free hand glowed with green light as she pointed at each of them, suspending them by their ankles with an invisible force, "I believe my warning yesterday would be clear enough; I do not tolerate any disruption to my teaching. Whether this is you questioning the efficacy of what I teach, or preventing another student from learning when they wish to do so, I will not have any of it. Do I make myself clear, boys?"

Silence.

" **Do I make myself clear, boys?** " she said once again, letting a little of her Thu'um into it, shaking the entire classroom. The four boys immediately nodded their heads, and the hold over their ankles was released, dropping them unceremoniously onto the floor. "Then get to your seats. Any further infractions from any of you, and I will personally make sure that you wish that you had never been born at all,"

After CRDL had scrambled to their seats, nursing their bruises, Valeria motioned for the class to resume their own seats. "Now, as I was saying earlier, the purpose of this class is to activate your reserves of magicka. I assume that you have all thought of which school of magic that you would like to specialise in? If you have not, or you do not wish to learn how to do any form of magic at all, you may leave the classroom, and we shall not have any more to speak about for the rest of your time in Beacon Academy. This is a voluntary subject in your education as hunters and huntresses, and will not be required to graduate,"

As if they had been waiting for those words, CRDL sprinted for the exit, slamming the door behind them. "As I had expected. Well, may I assume that the rest of you have thought of your specialisations, and that I may begin the activation ritual?"

A murmur of 'yes' went around the classroom. Clapping her hands together, Valeria said, "Excellent! Now then, I require one volunteer to demonstrate the effects of the potion that stands before me. Will anyone do so"

A white-sleeved hand shot up instantly.

"Ah, Miss Schnee. Step forward,"

Weiss walked forward with certainty in her step, though as she got closer to the potion basin, she wrinkled her nose. The smell of the potion was very strange; it was coppery, earthy and musty, combined with something sharp that made her nose feel as though it was about to fall away. Valeria held out the crystal chalice that was on the table behind her, which Weiss took in her hands gingerly. A faint flash of green came from the chalice when her hands touched it.

"What...?" she muttered to herself, wondering where the unpleasant smell of the potion had gone. Instead, she was smelling something reminiscent of blueberry and vanilla, combined with the smell of roses that was often in a certain teammate's bathroom supplies. Her favourite scents.

"Ah, I had forgotten to mention that, haven't I, judging by your reaction. The potion itself, when it was first invented as an aid to help those with underdeveloped magicka reserves, was unimaginably unpleasant to drink; and every attempt at making it any more pleasant to imbibe rendered the potion virtually useless. It took the brightest minds of the Arcane University over five hundred years to create a masking enchantment sufficiently strong to properly mask its stench and taste without altering its powers. Miss Schnee, I assume that you now smell something pleasant after you have held the chalice?"

She nodded, looking at the glass with wonder. "Yes. Vanilla...blueberries...and roses,"

"Splendid. Then, if you will, fill the chalice with the potion in this basin and drink it. Three mouthfuls should be enough,"

Her mouth was watering by the time she hovered over the rim of the bowl with the chalice in her hand. Slowly, she lowered it into the bubbling liquid; even after she had taken the liquid out of the basin, it was still roiling and emitting fumes and sparks. With a little bit of trepidation, she pinched her nose and downed the entire chalice's contents in a single gulp.

It was not _terrible_ ; the taste was that of blueberry milkshake, mixed with a hint of mild vanilla as she had expected. But it was the horrible, gassy aftermath that she truly, truly loathed. For the first time in her life, the prim and proper Schnee emitted a burp. In public. A truly titanic burp, louder than Yang's after a night of drinking. Naturally, the class gave a loud gasp of shock when they heard it; and at that moment, Weiss wished that she could have _anything_ to vanish back into her dorm and never be seen, ever again.

"Order! Order, please!" Valeria shouted, shaking her head in amusement mixed with pity. She had seen this far too many times, and the reaction from those who were well-off or of aristocratic lineage were invariably the same. "Miss Schnee, how do you feel now?"

"I feel as though I want to vanish into the ground and not be seen again," mumbled Weiss, her face burning redder and redder with every passing moment, "But...I feel energised?"

"Excellent. That indicates that the potion has done its job, and your magicka reserves have been activated for the first time. Now, have you decided on what school – or two – that you wish to specialise in?"

"I suppose...my first preference would be Conjuration...and then...Restoration?" she said uncertainly. The Schnee family could conjure defeated opponents using glyphs, but she had always had trouble doing that. A secondary way of conjuring creatures to defend her would be a definite advantage; and given the number of ways that her teammates – and her partner especially – found to injure themselves, in and out of battle, being able to heal wounds would be of great use to her.

"Very well," Valeria answered, taking the chalice from her hands and turning around to pick up two books from the pile behind her. "A basic conjuration manual for summoning your own wolf familiar, and a basic restoration manual for healing minor wounds on yourself. Please read these by the evening of tomorrow, and make sure that you try casting them at least ten times by next class,"

One by one, the students were called out to drink the potion, until eventually all of them received one or two books each. Only those taking enchanting received nothing, as Valeria said that the materials used were too dangerous to be taken anywhere away from the sealed crates in her laboratory on Beacon Academy's rooftop.

"Very well, that concludes our class for today. You are all free to leave, but I shall be in here for another hour or so to answer questions if anyone wishes for more information," Valeria spoke, tapping her staff on the basin in front of her and vanishing away all of the remaining potion, "For all the following weeks, you will have multiple classes for magic. Magickal theory and spellcasting basics is mandatory for every student still here. Specialised classes run once a week for each School of Magic, unless amended on your timetables. May Julianos watch over your studies,"

"Hey, Blake, what's in the box?" Yang asked the cat faunus. She had taken Illusion and Alchemy as her specialisations. The book was titled Courage, which supposedly imparted the ability to grant someone the confidence and will to remain in a fight for a longer. The sealed boxes that every Alchemy student received piqued the curiosity of those who had not taken Alchemy as an elective; and right now, Yang had the strongest urge to take the one sitting on Blake's table and open it up right there.

"I don't know. Maybe we should open it in our dorms? I'd rather not spill things here, if I can help it," she replied, giving the box a slight shake. Muffled clinking sounds, like glass bottles in a padded box, came from inside. "Yeah, definitely not opening this here. I don't want to drop all the bottles that might be inside. What did you and Ruby get from her?"

"Uh...I got a book called Flames...and the same Healing one that Weiss got. Rubes, what'd you get?"

"I got Candlelight," Ruby said happily. She was already poring through the book with childlike curiosity. "Archmage Septim said that eventually I might even get to learn how to transmute metals! I can't wait for it!"

"Wait, I know my sister doesn't like to read, but are you telling me _you_ don't want to learn how to set things on fire?" Yang gasped, clutching at her heart, "You aren't something that's been conjured to replace my Ruby, are you?"

"Pfft. No. I took Enchanting as my second elective," Ruby giggled, "Why would I pass up a chance to make my sweetheart even better? I went to that extended demonstration, you know. And J'Bari might have shown me the enchantment on her shortsword to seal the deal. Hey guys, how about we head back to our dorm to take a look at each other's stuff? I bet we can find out more if we all look at it,"

"This one approves," purred J'Bari, picking up Yang's Flames book, "This one can walk J'Bari's friends through the basic spellbooks. Having another teach you is much easier than trying to learn from a book,"

"Alright then. Team RWBY, back to the dorms!"

* * *

"Someone stole my cookie? My COOKIE CLAYMORE? Why, that's unacceptable! Which knave had such a desire for my baked blades? Someone that wants a cookie cutter? Or was it someone that wants to cut with a cookie? Or someone that wants a rye razor?"

"My lord, I believe the person that took your new personal weapons from the kitchens at New Sheoth Palace-"

"Oh, so you ARE useful for SOMETHING, Haskill? Other than walking around, spouting nonsense about Order in my realm? My realm of beautiful chaos and madness? Tell me, then; who stole my baked goods? I'd like to talk to them. Talk to them real good. Talk to them real proper, about whose PROPERTY they were STEALING! And then show them how to skip rope. As properly as it should be done. WITH THEIR INTESTINES!"

"Well, my lord, unless you wish to see your daughter dead, that would not be a good idea,"

Sheogorath then looked at his chamberlain with a mixture of disbelief and glee. "Haskill? Telling a JOKE? Truly, this is a happy day! Who knew that my witless, humourless, bone-dry chamberlain could tell a joke! One that was actually funny. How can my daughter, my stick-up-the-butt daughter, think of stealing one of MY creations? Unless you weren't telling a joke. Are you telling a joke?"

"No, my lord. I am being completely, utterly serious,"

"Oh. Oh!" Sheogorath cried out, his face splitting in a wide grin, "Happy day! So my daughter found a way to remove that stick from up her butt? What magic did she manage to use to do that? Or did she even use magic?"

"I highly doubt that she had anything untoward in the rear of her digestive system, my lord. But she did send back two dremora to send her regards to yourself. They also came back bearing the two things that were stolen from your kitchens,"

"Well, don't just stand there, get it for me! You can get it for me. Right? RIGHT!? Actually, forget about it. If she sent some back, there's probably something wrong with it. And even as THE Madgod, I cannot abide sending my daughter some paltry, broken gifts! Even if she took them herself without my knowledge. Haskill? I have a new task for you! A fun task. A challenging task!"

"Yes, what is it, my lord?"

"Fire up the ovens in New Sheoth, of course! If she wants the things I made earlier SO BADLY that she just had to steal it from me, then I'll MAKE IT RAIN where she is!"

Haskill sighed. This was going to be a long, long day.

* * *

A/N

And the reign of madness is approaching! Let the students of Beacon all eat cake. Or cookie. Or breadstick, preferably not shoved up the land where the sun don't shine. At least it's not raining cats and dogs. Or flaming cats and flaming dogs. That worked out oh so well for those Khajiit villagers in Border Watch.

Folks asking about specialisation preferences; some of you were quite on target :D

Heitomos: Weiss' Aura capacity is...fragile, to say the least. She's actually the character that gets knocked out the most frequently in the whole series. Including one time when she gets knocked out by a watermelon hammer wielded by Nora with a single hit. Considering that a Frost Atronach actually generates enough impact force to stagger a dragon with one hit, I think that they can actually hit hard enough to knock her out in one solid punch :P Especially after getting Myrtenaster stuck and therefore being disarmed.

Note to self: Do not put Weiss vs. a Skyrim giant's club. If that ever happened, I think Skyrim's space program would get to Masser and Secunda faster than a Khajiit can say 'Skooma'.

To everyone else that reviewed, favourited or followed, thank you for your continued support. Feel free to leave comments, questions etc. Will answer by the next episode. Stay tuned for more!


	4. 04 - Poison is Potion Spelled Wrong

Four days had passed since the activation of the students' magicka reserves (minus Team CRDL, who were now exempt from the classes). With all the buzz about magic making its rounds through the student body, many of them had been found reading their provided spell tomes – with varying levels of success. Some, like Weiss, had been able to almost instinctively cast spells immediately after reading their books. Others...well...

"DUST DAMN IT, WHAT AM I DOING WRONG!" Yang screamed in Team RWBY's dorm. Despite the best of J'Bari's efforts to teach her how to control magic, it seemed that the Khajiit was doomed to endure singed whiskers every time the blonde attempted to create some flames. Her boundless energy – and unbridled rage – caused the amount of energy that she put into each cast to spiral out of control, with disastrous consequences.

"This one has said many times before. Yang must learn to clear her mind and let the magickal energies flow naturally, rather than forcing it out," J'Bari said calmly; though if the twitching of her ears and eyes were any indication, her patience was rapidly running out.

Little did either of them realise that Blake had been quietly casting Courage repeatedly on Yang for the past hour, while pretending to be reading one of her pieces of 'fine literature' on her bed. Ruby sat beside Blake, gleefully playing with a ball of light that she was bouncing between her hands. Cleverly placed, of course, to disguise her rather wide mischievous grin from her enraged sister. Weiss wisely pretended to be engrossed in writing an essay for Professor Port, knowing that provoking a fight would be most unwise, though silently she was smirking in amusement behind the raging blonde.

Eventually, however, Blake's scroll pinged with an alert. With a heavy sigh, Blake put down her book and pulled it out.

"...Is this a joke? A class after dinner?" she groaned, falling face first into her book and pillow. Ruby, being the inquisitive girl that she was, fished Blake's scroll out from underneath her and quickly looked at the timetable.

"Oh wow, you DO have a class after dinner," Ruby gasped, handing back the scroll. "At least it's nearby. It's on the rooftop...wait...rooftop? J'Bari, what's actually up there?"

"Khajiit has been helping Her Majesty plant a garden. She initially wished for the plants to be placed in the academy's courtyard, but the Headmaster suggests that students may possibly ruin the plants. Her Majesty chose the rooftop instead,"

"Plants? What plants?" she asked, tilting her head to one side.

"If Ruby wishes to come along, J'Bari is sure that Her Majesty would not have any problems. J'Bari must go now, as she must help Her Majesty with the class. Blake should probably go now as well, unless she wishes to be...disciplined,"

That caught the faunus girl's attention. She shivered at the mere thought of having a crusty cookie-club being smashed on her sensitive ears with great force.

"Yes. I'm going, I'm going!" cried Blake, quickly getting up from the bed and sliding out the box of alchemy supplies from under her bed. She was about to carry the whole box when J'Bari stopped her.

"You only need the silver dagger from inside the box. This one has set up proper alchemy workbenches on the rooftop,"

Blake looked at the Khajiit strangely. What was the point of giving the box of strange glassware with weird runes on their sides if she didn't need it anyway?

* * *

"Good. I see the class is...here," Valeria said, emerging from behind a tall potted shrub when she heard the rooftop elevator arrive with a sharp _ding_. Blake, J'Bari, Ren and a few other first-year students walked out first, followed by a second year and a couple of other third years. All of them gawked at the riot of colour that filled the previously barren rooftop; a veritable rainbow of colourful flowers lined one side, while several larger pots in the middle held shrubs with luminous berries hanging heavily from every branch. Another row of pots bore various kinds of earthy mushrooms of all shapes and sizes, some of which were periodically emitting greenish clouds of spores. To top it all off, the entire garden was lit with small floating balls of light, resembling overly large fireflies dancing in the night sky.

"Welcome to the alchemy classroom. Or more appropriately, the alchemy garden. Assume positions around an empty workstation," she continued, dusting herself off and walking to her larger workbench at the front of the class, "I do hope that you have all opened the basic alchemy kits that I have provided, and read the first pages of the beginners' manual inside. Though it appears that is not the case for _some_ ," growled the Archmage, narrowing her eyes on a second year who had brought his entire alchemy kit, "Place the kit somewhere safe, and bring the silver dagger that is inside. You will not need the entire kit for these classes in the future; just the dagger will suffice. Bring the kit back with you once this class has concluded,"

"So...uh, what's the kit for, if we only need this silver knife for these classes?" one of the first years asked.

"The kits are for your own experimentation and use outside of this class. As novice alchemists, you should seek out potentially reactive ingredients that is present in nature. These are all around us; plant matter, animal matter, mineral matter, each yielding different magickal properties once prepared with the correct tools. But for now, we shall focus on plant matter-"

"PLANT MATTER? What is wrong with you?" a loud voice boomed out from nowhere, causing Valeria's ears to twitch in annoyance. "Plants are boring, _boring_ , BORING! No blood, no gore, no guts. No skipping with intestines! Where's the fun in that?!"

"Sheogorath," hissed Valeria, slamming her staff against the floor, "This is not the best time or place,"

"NONSENSE! It's ALWAYS a great time for Uncle Sheo!" laughed the voice. A purple portal burst out of nowhere behind the archmage, from which a portly bald man with an insufferably bored expression emerged. Behind him, however, came a man with a short beard and an impeccably outlandish patchwork suit; gold embroidered thread clashed with the most dull and dreary black velvet, coupled with the largest, most outrageously large starched ruff that ever existed on Remnant. Or anywhere else in the known universe, for that matter.

Gritting her teeth in annoyance, Valeria resolved to continue the class. Even with the Madgod present, surely she could continue, couldn't she? After all, she wouldn't be the Empress of the Nirnian Empire if she allowed such a small...annoyance...to get in the way of what she needed to do.

"As I was saying, we shall focus on plant matter for tonight. The reason for this is that most novices to the alchemical arts may find the preparation of plant matter much easier than that of animal or mineral matter. Today, I shall show you how to prepare a basic healing potion. While it will not- Sheogorath, please do _not_ eat or drink my alchemical reagents,"

The Madgod in question was standing in front of a tall cask of distilled grain spirits with a mug in one hand, and a glowing blue fruit in the other. He devoured the fruit before washing it down with the strong alcohol, belching loudly and patting his belly afterwards.

"What? It's a shame to not eat the food, you know. And to not drink the drinks!" he chuckled. Picking one more of the glowing blue fruits from the plant next to him, he tossed it to Blake. "Here, eat one!"

Blake stood there, open mouthed, as she looked warily between Valeria and the strange man that had appeared through the portal. The archmage looked as though she were ready to explode with fury, while the man that she had called Sheogorath wore a shit-eating grin on his face. Deciding to not tempt fate by angering the archmage, she placed the fruit down on the table.

"Oh, how BORING!" wailed Sheogorath, turning around and kicking the ground like a sulking child.

"Thank you, Miss Belladonna. Now, as I had been saying before, I intend to demonstrate how to prepare a basic healing potion. Given that you are learning to become huntsmen and huntresses to defend the world, it is equally wise to learn how to prepare a concoction that will readily heal most wounds, both major and minor, as well as dull the pain and mend any broken bones over time," Valeria continued tersely, glaring at the Madgod. Who, unfortunately for her, had one hand as high up as possible, standing on his tiptoes. "Yes, what is it, Madgod?"

"You know, why would you bother learning how to make these potions when you can learn how to bake?"

"Excuse me?" Valeria responded, taken aback by the bizarre question.

"Oh, you know. Baking. Making delicious goods. Or not so delicious goods. Like the TWO you STOLE from my kitchens! And broke, by the way. Thanks for returning them anyway, even if they did come with a bit more hair in them than they had to start with. Cookies do love their wigs, you know,"

"Food is nowhere near as efficient for healing wounds, Sheogorath. These young ladies and fine gentlemen must learn how to prepare potions correctly, if a healer is unavailable,"

"Nonsense! You just need some convincing. Which I can oblige with. Right now!"

Narrowing her eyes, Valeria cast an extremely bright ball of light above her head. She shaped the ball to form a cone which produced a blinding beam which lit the sky for miles, sweeping it from side to side. Nothing was there. Yet Sheogorath was still wearing that maddeningly irritating grin of his, and she could not seem to shake the feeling that there was something wrong.

Only when the light of the broken moon was abruptly darkened did she realise something was wrong.

Horribly wrong.

She tore the beam of light away from the horizon and cast it up. Sure enough, there was a dark shape above the academy, resembling a cloud.

A cloud that was far too low to be a raincloud. And one that was too small and opaque to be even considered a raincloud.

One which was steadily dropping little 'raindrops' of chocolate chips, right on her nose.

" **Vonmindoraan wuth mey!** J'BARI!" roared Valeria at her apprentice, realising what that cloud was made of, "Greater ward, this instant! Protect the rooftop!"

The two mages erected a brilliant blue barrier above the rooftop – and not a moment too soon. A torrent of thousands of chocolate chip cookies, mixed with breadsticks and random sweetrolls and sweetcakes descended from the dark mass in the sky. Students gaped at the spectacle unfolding in front of them; their Archmage and her apprentice holding back a deluge of sweet treats with no small amount of effort, their eyes aflame with fury at the crazy old coot that they called Sheogorath, who was clapping slowly in manic glee.

* * *

Back in Team RWBY's dorms...

"Hey, sis, did you hear something...?" Ruby asked, lowering her comic book for a moment. Weiss and Yang paused from what they were doing, listening intently.

It sounded as though there was something crumbly was falling against something hard. Right outside their dorm, outside the building. Out of curiosity, Ruby walked over to the window and cast a Candlelight.

A loud gasp of delight escaped her lips, and she bolted out of the room in a flurry of rose petals, leaving two very perplexed girls in the room.

* * *

Eventually, the hail of baked goods slowed and stopped, the shields holding as the last of the cookies slid over the side of the building.

"Consider it my thanks for borrowing my freshly baked cookie greatsword!" Sheogorath cried out cheerfully, "Oh, my. Look at the time! It looks like it's time for me to invite Malacath to a tea party! And Malacath does hate it so when I'm late. I'll leave you to do what you want for now. But just remember to visit dear old me! I've got strawberry tortes, you know,"

With that, Sheogorath performed a theatrical bow to the rest of the class before stepping through a portal and vanishing. His follower likewise did the same, though he also bowed respectfully to Valeria, who waved him away dismissively.

"Finally. I apologise for the disruptions to the class, students. It is difficult to predict what a Daedric Prince will do, even if it isn't a hostile one," sighed Valeria, cradling her face with her hands, "Let us continue, then. I suppose that you have all seen the blue fruit that Miss Belladonna has on her table. You will be pleased to know that this is what is known as an Alocasia fruit, which is one of the ingredients which will be used in our potion. Yes, Mr. Lie?"

"What's a...Daedric Prince?"

"An immortal denizen of the Planes of Oblivion. Specifically, the lord of a Plane. For your safety, and that of every other student's, I would suggest that we refrain from discussing this topic any further. Yes, Miss Belladonna?"

"Uh...Is this safe to eat?" she asked, curiously prodding the blue fruit in front of her with her dagger.

Valeria nodded. "It is certainly safe to eat, and my apprentice assures me that is it most delicious and wholesome, since I have not eaten any myself. For the first part of the lesson, I will need you all to take a single fruit from the tree, and chop it into small chunks no larger than the width of your little finger. I shall allow you all five minutes to do so,"

In hindsight, Valeria thought that perhaps it would have been better to not inform the students about the fact that Alocasia was delicious. Of each fruit that the students had taken, perhaps a third was devoured by the time they had finished chopping them into small bits. At least there was still enough remaining to make a proper potion with on each workstation.

"Very well. I would ask you to curb your...ravenous hunger...in the future," Valeria commented, chuckling quietly when a few of the students blushed in embarrassment, "Now. The next step is to collect five giant aloe vera leaves from the plants to the side of the classroom-" she pointed at a mass of dark green, spiky plants, "-and do the same as you had done with the fruits. This time, however, do try not to eat the reagents. This particular plant has sap that is rather...adhesive. Shred the leaves as finely as you can,"

When the students had finished shredding their aloe vera leaves, and both J'Bari and Valeria were satisfied that the preparation had been done correctly, Valeria walked back up to the front of the class. Producing a set of finely shredded ingredients that she had prepared before class, she held up a gold-inlaid mortar and pestle before putting it down on her workstation.

"The next step is to crush the ingredients and separate out the magickal essence from the mundane," she said, tipping all the chopped ingredients into the mortar and pestle and grinding them down. Blake looked on curiously when she saw a faint pinkish liquid trickle out the side of the mortar and pestle and into a small bowl on its side, along with a wisp of sickly green floating in it. "These tools have been refined for centuries, and you will no longer have to manually filter out the essence from the mundane residues. Do so now, and bottle it up,"

"That's it? That's a potion?" asked the third year student incredulously, "Just...cutting up some fruit, and a herb, smashing it, and bottling up whatever that is that comes out?"

"A rather crude way of describing the art of alchemy, but yes, that is accurate enough for our purposes. Using only the mortar and pestle produces a workable potion, if a little weak and impure," Valeria replied.

"Can you show us if it works?" he said, crossing his arms, still unconvinced if it was going to work.

"J'Bari, please come to the front,"

"By your orders, this one complies," J'Bari answered, swiftly moving to the front. Valeria pulled out a small glass vial from a compartment under the workbench and tipped the pink solution into the vial.

"Cut yourself and drink the potion," she ordered the Khajiit calmly, drawing a few shocked gasps from the students. J'Bari slashed her left wrist without hesitation, holding up her hand so that all can see the deep gash on it; then, she gulped down the potion with one swift movement. The bleeding slowed and stopped, and they could see skin and fur knit back before their eyes, until eventually the only evidence of the injury was the blood stuck to her fur.

"Thank you for demonstrating its effectiveness," purred Valeria, to which J'Bari purred back in response while bowing deeply. "Now, I wish for you to attempt the same with your ingredients. Unlike the quantity that I had used, the amount of ingredients on each of your workstations should be sufficient to produce five doses. There are many empty vials under the benches; bottle all of the potions and bring one to me for evaluation. Are there any questions?"

A hand shot up at the back. "Yes, Mr. Lie?"

"If we're going to be pounding these things in the mortar and pestles, what makes the difference between a good potion and a bad one?"

"An excellent question! The quality of a potion is, of course, determined first and foremost by the quality of the ingredients used in its manufacture. A rotten egg, for example, will not behave the same way as a fresh one. Then comes the method of preparation. Metals are reactive by their very nature, and can sometimes even constitute an ingredient in a mineral-based potion. For this reason, I discourage the use of iron knives, as any acid in any ingredient will affect the final result. Silver tends to behave as a purifying reagent in most potions, and therefore these silver daggers will be beneficial to any potion that you mix. Lastly, the method of preparation itself affects the quality. The finer the ingredients are cut, the more potent the result, but the more difficult it is to crush the essence from the mundane residue,"

"So...we must find a balance?"

Valeria nodded in approval. "Precisely, Mr. Lie. It is up to each individual to determine their preferred exact method of processing the ingredients, even if the overall method is the same between all alchemists. I believe that should be sufficient theory for you all to produce a potent set of basic potions; I wish to see one potion from each of you in front of myself before the end of this class,"

"And this one wishes to add that this one will be...testing them..." J'Bari growled menacingly, rubbing her recently-healed wrist, "This one assures you that if a potion is not well made, this one can be...very angry,"

* * *

Blake soon returned to Team RWBY's dorms, happily carrying four doses of relatively potent healing potions in her pocket. She was pleased to hear that she had shredded the ingredients to such a good and even fineness that the secondary effects of the healing potions were evident; J'Bari had to be calmed by a powerful paralytic spell by the archmage due to the energy-inducing secondary effect that her potion had. Apparently, the years of precise cutting using Gambol Shroud was paying off.

Before she laid a hand on the door to their room, however, she heard a muffled voices from inside.

"Mmmph- Rubes, what the _hell_! Where'd you get all THIS?" she heard Yang, though her voice was blocked out by something inside.

"Help me, you dolt- I'm drowning!" she heard Weiss gasp out.

Blake raised an eyebrow. Drowning? In the bathtub? No, that couldn't be right. Weiss' voice wasn't coming from their bathroom. With a little bit of dread about what their hyperactive team leader could be up to, she slowly turned the handle on the dormitory door.

Only to be knocked down by a tide of cookies, cakes, breadsticks and sweetrolls. A torrent strong enough to slam her against Team JNPR's dormitory door on the other side and break down their door, scattering the baked items across their floor. The cat faunus eventually came to a rest at Pyrrha's feet, looking up into the eyes of a very concerned redhead.

"Um...What's going on?" Pyrrha asked uncertainly, helping Blake to her feet while gingerly avoiding any of the food on the ground.

It was Yang, however, that provided the answer. All while lying down on a bed of sweetcakes covering the middle of the hallway.

"My sister had a very _half-baked_ idea, that's what happened,"

* * *

A/N:

Word wall:

Vonmindoraan wuth mey: Incomprehensible old fool.

Now with +9001% more insult vs your mother!

Ultima-owner: Damn straight it rained cookies.

Indecisive Bob: Yes. Yes she (he? I'm not even sure about how to address a Daedric Prince when they switch genders) did. And the chaos is swift; and most assuredly DELICIOUS. Now, if Ruby had that happen in the food fight...

Akshka: Daedric Safety 101 will have to be in the conjuration class. After all, it's the class that's got the most to do with pulling stuff out of Oblivion and putting them into the material plane. That, or putting souls from the material plane and into Oblivion. Specifically, the Soul Cairn.

John (Guest): Thanks! It's great to know that someone had as much fun reading this as I did cutting loose and writing this crazy piece just for the hell of it. Sheogorath is right; madness IS fun! Mania, here I come! :D

Playwars: Almost missed your review because the mail system derped. A lot of this will be hijinks that happen during their training, but there will be plot interspersed in there.

theBSDude: Well spotted, corrected.

As usual, I hope you guys had fun reading this! Questions, comments, feedback are all welcome, and I will try to answer them as best I can by the next chapter.


	5. 05 - Shots Fired

The morning after the aptly-named 'Flourmageddon' happened, hordes of students made their way to the ground level of the academy to find an astounding amount of baked goods - freshly made, if one would count a single night of being outside 'fresh' - lying in mounds beside the Academy's main building, with a hastily-scribbled sign perched precariously on a second floor window indicating that it was all free to take for anyone. Naturally, the lien-starved students began to haul as much of it as they could back to their dorm kitchens with reckless abandon, shovelling load after load of bread and cakes into buckets and baskets - and in one case, even using a cloak as a stretcher to carry as much as four people could bring back up in one run.

The owner of said cloak, however, was far less amused. Ruby was now wailing about the theft of her beloved cloak when she was hanging it up after a wash. Yang, naturally, wore the all the anger of an overprotective elder sister quite openly.

"Nora..." Yang growled, her eyes an angry red as she caught Nora and a reluctant JPR hauling up a load of sweetcakes using Ruby's cloak as a sling, "You know what happens to people who mess with my sister, don't you...?"

"Oops," she cheekily said, not the least bit sorry, "Ren suggested it,"

Fortunately for the orange-haired hammer wielder, both her and Yang's scrolls beeped to indicate that there was a class for both of them. And that meant that they couldn't engage in a brawl at that point in time. "You got off easy this time, Nora. What's this class..."

"Destruction magic. In...the old quarry outside Beacon's grounds?"

"Ooh, fireballs!" Ruby said excitedly, her grief over her cloak's mistreatment momentarily forgotten. A flurry of rose petals later, and JNPR suddenly found themselves short one cookie-carrying sling and up one mess on the ground. Ruby had shaken all the crumbs out of her cloak and was now bouncing up and down in excitement. "Can I come too? I mean, Ireadthatonebookaboutfireandflames-"

"This one thinks that Ruby needs to slow down," J'Bari groaned, her ears twitching, "But this one does not think that Her Majesty would turn down a student so eager to learn, even if the student is not actually enrolled in the class-"

"Yay! Yang, come on, let's go!" cheered the hyperactive brunette, zooming off with a trail of petals in her wake, dragging Yang along with her before J'Bari could say anything more. The revving of a motorcycle indicated exactly where the sisters had gone.

"This one was about to say that Her Majesty has created a portal on the rooftop that leads to the quarry," sighed J'Bari. A soft cough caught her attention, however, and she found Weiss standing behind her, holding up a Flames book, "...And that she has forgotten her spell tome. Can this one assume that Weiss also wishes to come along?"

"Do you really need to ask?" the heiress smirked. Anything to get an edge over her enemies and rivals, Grimm or otherwise. And that extended to lessons on a subject that she wasn't even enrolled in, but may find useful.

* * *

When Weiss and J'Bari - and Nora, of course - stepped through the portal on the rooftop, they were met with the sight of a slack-jawed Yang and Ruby. "W-wait, are you telling me that...?"

"If Ruby and Yang had waited for a few more seconds, this one was about to explain that Her Majesty has a portal on the rooftop connected to this quarry," sighed J'Bari, tossing Yang her Flames book, "Do try to remember the material that you are supposed to cover for each lesson,"

"Damn it, Rubes, we should've just walked! Thanks for that, by the way, kittycat!" Yang called out, catching the book, ignoring the venomous glare that J'Bari was giving her.

The old quarry, once overgrown with weeds and strewn with half-carved stone, had been converted into an impromptu amphitheatre by the archmage. With the help of a horde of conjured atronachs, she had cleared and levelled the quarry overnight, leaving behind several semicircular rows of stone benches surrounding a raised stage of rough-hewn rock. Several more students popped out of the portal, all of them gaping in awe at what had been created for them.

"I see that most of my students have arrived. Welcome to the Destruction class," Valeria announced, "Take a seat on the benches, and we shall begin. I do hope that you have all taken some time to familiarise yourselves with the basics of casting the Flames spell, as that will be our focus for today,"

A few guilty faces caused the archmage to smirk in amusement. "Some of you, it appears, have not done so. How many of you can produce embers?"

All the hands in the class went up. Nodding, Valeria continued. "A fireball in your hands? A stream of flame?"

Most hands remained up. "A stream of flame hot enough to melt tempered steel?"

All the hands went down, except for one. Valeria's ears flicked when she recognised whose it was. "Miss Schnee. I do believe that you were enrolled for the Restoration and Conjuration classes, were you not? You must truly have been busy if you claim to be better than the rest of the class with Destruction. I assume that Miss Xiao Long has lent you her Flames book?"

Weiss nodded. "Yes, that would be correct," she responded, remembering that Valeria approved rather strongly of proper etiquette.

"Excellent. I had assumed that one of your refined upbringing would have the ambition required to properly harness the intricacies of magic, and I do wish to see if my assumption will be proven true. Step forward, Miss Schnee. Let us see your flames ignite this stone statue behind myself,"

Weiss took a look at what was behind Valeria. One of the giant frost atronachs was dragging a large stone statue of a naked, athletic human male onto the stage. She looked at her hands and willed a small flame to appear. Her flames started off as a weak, narrow jet, barely enough to remove the dirt that was stuck to the statue.

 _You will not bring shame to the Schnee name._

That pathetic effort will not do, she thought to herself. She was a Schnee; she was better than this. Better than the unwashed masses, even if they were handpicked by Ozpin himself to attend Beacon Academy. Her will focused some more, forcing the magicka coursing in her veins to boost the flow in her fingertips. That was rewarded when the narrow jet of flame suddenly roared to life, now a respectable yellowish-orange that was definitely charring the stone.

"That is quite powerful, Miss Schnee, but not quite what I had asked for. Let us see if you can do better,"

"Go Weiss! That's my Weissy!" cheered Ruby, causing the heiress to blush a bright scarlet. No doubt Yang was going to give her hell for that later.

Her mind wandered to Ruby. The dolt was energetic; sometimes too much so, often ruining her work ethics by dragging her out to do something 'fun'. Then came the issue of how she was clumsy and how she almost ran Weiss through with Myrtenaster when she had asked to be taught how to wield a rapier. And she shuddered when she recalled how Ruby could shovel cookie after cookie into her mouth without a single care in the world. Perhaps it was just her metabolism that was off the charts, or perhaps it was her Semblance that demanded so much energy. Either way, she was jealous of how much she could eat, and yet still be able to fit inside those adorable stockings of hers. How she could still fit in that corset without much effort to watch her diet.

But for all her faults, she was by far the kindest, sweetest and most adorable girl that anyone could ever have. Better than any _boy_ had been to her. Weiss grit her teeth with rage when she recalled the suitors that her father set her up with. Those spoiled, snobbish, self-absorbed, chauvinistic pigs. Attempting to maintain a semblance of class when there was none to begin with. Her blood boiled at the memories of the very first time her father had set her up for one of these; she wished that there was some way of getting back at him-

"Oh, my. That looked exquisitely painful," Valeria chuckled, watching the raging fire in Weiss' hands turn into a jet of roaring blue-white flames. Every man in the class cringed when they noticed exactly where the heiress was directing her flames, reflexively protecting their their closest companions as the statue had a distinct hole all but melted into it. Right in its pride and joy, which drooped and fell to the ground in a molten mass. "Very well, Miss Schnee. You have exceeded my expectations, and may consider yourself...well accomplished in the use of flames in a more or less controlled manner. Here, perhaps this potion may be of use to you at this time. Drink it,"

Muttering her thanks, Weiss took the vial of blue potion from Valeria and drained the contents in a single gulp. She felt her rage ebb away, leaving a sensation of utter serenity; and whatever exhaustion that she would have normally felt after expending such a large amount of magicka faded away, replaced by a sensation of intangible power leaping between her fingers.

"It is merely a calming draught with some magicka restoration elements in it," Valeria added, noticing the questioning look in the heiress' eyes. "I must admit, your capacity for anger was most amusing. The wayward men that dare to look in your direction should be very much afraid. Now then, I believe that is enough entertainment for now. Let us discuss what we have just seen, and how this affects your own spellcasting. Please find a seat and prepare to take notes,"

After the class had been properly seated - and those of the male persuasion given calming draughts to overcome the trauma of witnessing the demise of certain parts of the statue - Valeria cleared her throat and spoke, "Now, for those of you who have read the introductory notes on Destruction magic, kindly inform us of the three requisite qualities that a mage must have before successfully casting Destruction magic,"

"Magicka, will, intent," recited Ren, having read through Nora's notes a few times last night after the hammer wielder insisted on being walked through the concepts of spellcasting, "Sufficient energy to cast it, the will to manifest it, and the intent to see your will done,"

"Correct, Mr. Lie. These are the three qualities required to cast both Destruction and Restoration magic, as well as Alteration magic. However, we are discussing only Destruction magic at this point in time, and thus, that is irrelevant for us at this point in time. Those of you who have not been able to create even embers, please stand and come to the front,"

A handful of students slowly stood up and walked to the front. A few of them were rubbing the backs of their heads while chuckling nervously. "There is no shame in admitting that you cannot cast. After all, you are learning, and occasionally you require additional guidance. Now, show me how you believe that flames should be cast,"

With trembling fingers, they held out their hands. Valeria inspected each of them, looking carefully at their fingers, until eventually she stopped at a green-haired boy who was shaking nervously.

"Hm. Mr. Verdis," she said, addressing the second-year, "Dare I assume that you doubt your own abilities?"

"Ye-I mean, no, I don't think...so...?"

"That is precisely what I mean. Do you believe that you can create fire from nothingness, or do you not?"

"..."

"If you are incapable of believing in it, then perhaps it is best for both of us that you stop here and now. Are you saying that you are less capable than the other students? That you are less worthy than they are?"

"No, that's not true!" he answered back hotly, "I just...I just don't see how this is even _possible_. I mean, it's not even my Semblance!"

Valeria looked at him oddly and gave a low, rumbling laugh. "Boy, you are more misguided than even Mr. Winchester if you truly believe that you cannot do this. But enough talking. Most of the first years have proven themselves capable of conjuring flames. Miss Schnee has proven especially adept at it. Are you saying that even after a full year of martial education in what is reputed to be the best combat academy in all of Remnant, you are incapable of mustering even embers in your hands? Are you so _weak_ that you cannot do so? _So...worthless?_ "

The stream of insults from Valeria had done the trick. With a scream of rage, the boy's hands erupted in flames, a jet of it streaking towards Valeria. Lazily holding up a hand, she blocked the flames with a shimmering blue barrier. After a second, the boy turned as white as a sheet when he realised what he had done and stumbled backwards, falling flat on his backside, whimpering in fear.

"And that is how you became capable of casting Flames, Mr. Verdis. By attacking your instructor. Congratulations," Valeria laughed, letting the barrier dissipate, "I apologise for the insults, however it appears that is the only way to force yourself to believe that you can create flames from nothingness. Do not worry; you have done no harm to myself, and as I had provoked that reaction from you, you warrant no disciplinary action. Return to your seat,"

The boy nodded nervously and stood back up, walking back to his seat at the front. The other students that were incapable of casting looked at their hands; within seconds, balls of flame erupted from their palms, eliciting whoops of joy from the previously nervous students.

"As all of you have drunk the magickal activation potion, I see little reason why you are unable to channel it naturally. Especially when the Flames spell is one of the least demanding of the entire School, considering its low magickal drain," Valeria spoke, motioning for the students on the stage to retake their seats, "That leaves only one possible cause for failure to cast. The lack of will, which you have seen is possible to overcome. Destruction spells require you to bend reality to an extent with the aid of your magicka, and without believing that you are capable of creating these changes, you will find yourself actually incapable of doing so, and vice versa. As you have all witnessed with Mr. Verdis, and the other students up here, of course. Yes, Miss Schnee?"

"Earlier we've heard that there were three things needed to successfully cast Destruction spells, but you said here that you can cast as long as you have the will to do it, and enough energy to make the flames," Weiss stated, "But that's only two things. What about the...intent?"

Valeria stared at her. She then glanced at the statue with its most precious bits melted away, and then back at Weiss, before she burst into loud, howling laughter, leaving the white-haired girl mystified by what is exactly so humorous about the damaged statue.

After she had managed to regather her composure, however, Valeria answered the heiress with a smile. "Well, Miss Schnee, you are perceptive indeed. The intent of the spell's wielder amplifies the strength of the spell, for better or worse. For Alteration spells, this is absolutely critical, as without the appropriate intent you will be completely unable to bend reality to your whim. For Restoration, one who does not wish for their intended target to be well will find their spells weak and unresponsive. For Destruction, however, the intent to cause truly grievous harm against the opponent or target strengthens the spell by leaps and bounds. I should like to know exactly what it was you were thinking to produce such a destructive flame against only _that_ part of the statue,"

Weiss turned beet red when she noticed exactly what she had burned away. And the fact that now every male in the class was slowly scooting away from her. Groaning, she buried her face in her hands. She was never going to live this down.

* * *

A/N:

Weiss: Perk Gained: Black Widow (Rank 1).

MeleeSmasher: I don't think anyone's brains were fully connected after seeing a rain of cookies and cakes. You'd be going WTF too after seeing that! Not to mention that asking more on a topic when your instructor is livid AND tells you to drop the line of questioning is probably not the brightest of ideas...

Indecisive Bob: Ruby has ways...yes...many ways... *shifty eyes*

ultima-owner: Sheogorath is EVERYONE's favourite Daedric Prince! Blasphemy! D:

cookie monster: Ruby: challenge accepted. Hey folks, there's a red vs blue match here! Cookie domination!

As usual, feel free to leave comments, reviews, feedback. Hope you had fun reading this!


	6. 06 - Field Tripping, Part One

Weiss felt a little strange coming to the rooftop laboratory for the Conjuration class. She checked and double checked the time and location of the class, and every single time it showed the exact same thing. She was on time, and at the right place; the magical barrier over the normally-open garden laboratory was a sure sign that there was a class being prepared. But as she glanced over her shoulder, she could see only one other student beside her that was part of the class: Velvet. Ruby was also following her, though it was more for an excuse to keep petting her conjured wolf familiar.

Velvet, it seemed, was fond of making her own familiar pose in all sorts of amusing stances while she took photographs with her camera. Right then, it was sitting down patiently with one forepaw placed over its eyes. A part of her wondered if the rabbit faunus was going to do that to a pet dog, if she ever purchased one.

The barrier over the door faded soon after. When she pushed the door open, she was greeted by the curious sight of Valeria emerging from behind the Alocasia plant, with Professor Goodwitch assisting her with moving buckets of picked fruit to the alchemy workstation at the front of the classroom.

"Ah, it appears the barrier over the classroom door has expired," Valeria sighed, removing her garden gloves and replacing them with her usual black silk ones, "I must say, Glynda, that it has been a pleasant time conversing with you regarding the direction of the academy. Your requested potions will be ready in about three days, but for now it appears that I have a class to teach. We shall have to discuss matters at another time. Farewell for now,"

Professor Goodwitch nodded. "Likewise, Valeria. A combat class is due to start for myself in half an hour. Good luck with your class,"

The Khajiit shook her head and smiled when she saw just how few students had arrived. Compared to the full-enrolment (and then some) Destruction class, Conjuration was definitely closer to a private tuition course than anything else. "So, I see the only two of my students for this class have come. With one additional student, it seems. Welcome, Miss Rose. Still fawning over the wolf, I see," she chuckled, watching the young girl coo and fuss over Weiss' conjured wolf familiar.

Ruby jumped when Weiss coughed and elbowed her, tipping her head towards Valeria. "Oh! Hi, Miss Septim! I-I mean, Professor Septim!"

"Proper etiquette does not seem to be your strong suit, young Rose. It is rude to ignore your teachers. But I do suppose that I am not your teacher at this very moment, and this mistake can be ignored," she chided her gently, "If you wish to learn more about Conjuration, I will not stop you; but I would ask that you try to not disrupt my class. You are, of course, familiar with what happens then,"

"Yup, got it, Professor! I'll behave,"

"The title is Archmage, young Rose. Now, we'll be heading to the abandoned quarry again, as I believe that we will be causing a rather significant amount of destruction this class, even if we are not many in number. Please, follow me,"

Stepping through the portal, they found themselves standing in the abandoned quarry. Which, by now, no longer resembled a quarry, but was a heavily reinforced circular amphitheatre resembling an arena. The seats were no longer bare; blocks of translucent bluish-white energy covered them; Ruby immediately scooted off to one, prodding it and squealing in delight when she felt it squash as though it were a rather soft, fluffy cushion. Looking upwards, she noticed that a semi-transparent shield dome was covering the entire amphitheatre; an array of shadecloths suspended from runed stone pillars kept every seat in the shade, protecting anyone that sat from the harsh summer sun.

"It appears that you have been busy, Archmage Septim. I suppose I have you to thank for adding one outdoor combat classroom to our academy. With such a convenient method of travel, too," Ozpin said, startling the students when he walked out from behind a stone pillar.

"I was merely looking for a place where my students can safely practice the more destructive of magickal arts, Headmaster. " replied Valeria matter-of-factly, "This abandoned quarry suits my purposes well,"

"I don't suppose that you could create another combat classroom at a later date? We could always use more durable practice locations,"

"Perhaps if you have another abandoned quarry somewhere, then yes, I do not have any objections to that,"

"Excellent. I shall keep it in mind for now. Thank you, and good luck with...your small class,"

After the headmaster walked back through the portal, Valeria cast a small thunderbolt to get the attention of her three students once more. "Now then, let us start. I assume that you two are both capable of conjuring the basic wolf familiar. Please demonstrate this to me, so that I may gauge your progress,"

Weiss nodded, closing her eyes and reaching out for a wolf spirit. It was much easier to perform in the open, away from all the other distractions that the Beacon Academy grounds normally had in the form of other students. A ghostly wolf manifested itself in front of her, earning an approving nod from Valeria.

"Excellent, Miss Schnee. A perfectly conjured wolf familiar. And it appears that Miss Scarlatina already has her wolf familiar out...though I really do wish that both Miss Rose and Miss Scarlatina would stop treating the summoned creature as a pet,"

Weiss turned around and immediately put a palm to her face. Ruby was being licked by an overly friendly wolf familiar hell-bent on giving her a tongue bath, while Velvet was looking on and taking photographs. Valeria tapped her staff twice on the stone floor, sending out two white bolts of light to the conjured familiars; both immediately vanished without a trace.

"Aww," Ruby pouted, though she sat back up on one of the stone benches.

"Now, before we start on practicing more advanced conjurations; I will ask whether or not you have read the warnings in the conjuration notes that I have provided," Valeria asked, "This is not a trivial matter. Conjuration magic, by its very nature, is extremely dangerous when performed incorrectly. An unbound or improperly bound Daedra is almost certain to turn on its summoner; an atronach may choose to disobey its master, refusing to attack even in the most dire of situations. If you are in this class, I expect nothing less than utmost attention to detail,"

Weiss nodded gravely. She had read the notes that were inside the Conjuration book the other night, and she had nearly vomited out her dinner by the sheer number of gruesome ways a conjurer could be slain by their own improperly summoned creatures. Or worse yet, the extraplanar realms of Oblivion that they could be thrown into.

"Very good. If that is the case, then I should have little worry about either of you mistakenly casting a portal for travelling to Oblivion, instead of drawing a creature out from there," Valeria said, her ears perking up in relief, "I should not like to venture into Sanguine's realms to retrieve one or both of you, like I had to do with my previous apprentice after a mishap in summoning a lesser Daedra. She...well, perhaps it would be best to not discuss it with young Miss Rose around, considering Sanguine's sphere of influence,"

"Oh trust me, I can take it!" Ruby cheerfully said, "What's the story behind your previous apprentice, Archmage Septim?"

"NO!" both Velvet and Weiss shouted back at her; their faces were pale, and they were frantically shaking their heads to dissuade her. "Ruby, trust me. Just for once. It's not something you want to hear about," pleaded Weiss. Ruby was as innocent as innocent could be; and the domain of Sanguine...well, corrupt would be the least vicious word that she could use to describe it.

"It's not _thaaat_ bad, is it?"

"I will simply mention that my previous apprentice was a female Breton. A rather attractive young woman, I might add," Valeria said, after a brief deliberation. Sometimes, the overly inquisitive needed to be punished. By their own curiosity, of course, "And that the Prince of Debauchery...well, let us simply say that his name is more apt than people believe..."

* * *

"Haskill! I'm bored!"

"Yes, my lord?" the Seneschal of Madness replied.

"Entertain me! You know, bring some clowns. Or was it clouds? Bury them all in a pit, and add some lemons! Then mash it all together. I do so love the tears of clouds!"

"That would be rain, my lord. And it appears that the skies are currently clear today,"

"Then bring me the next best thing since clouds! Clowns! Plenty of them! Actually, scratch that. If I'm going to have fun tormenting someone, I might as well make it my dearest daughter. Tell me, what's she doing this time?"

"She has apparently made a young girl cry in one of her lesson. Truly tragic, my lord,"

"A young girl? Her? Making a young girl cry?" Sheogorath gasped, a manic smile growing on his face, "SPLENDID! I must admit, she has not had the nerve to do that for far too long! Why, I must know; who exactly did she torment so? And how?!"

"That would be one of her pupils. She has apparently introduced to the young lady to Lord Sanguine's exploits,"

Sheogorath's jaw dropped. "Did I hear you right? She - my daughter - introduced _her pupil_ to dear old Sanguine? Wait, don't tell me. Sanguine invited himself in, didn't he? A dinner party? Or a team party? Some kind of party, without myself being invited!? Preposterous! I will not stand for this!" he yelled out, jumping up from his mismatched throne, "Haskill! Prepare the ovens of New Sheoth! We must rectify this travesty immediately!"

* * *

"No, no, no...ew...ewww! Gross! Why...why'd I even ask...eww!"

Back in the outdoor amphitheatre at Beacon, a certain black-and-red reaper was curled up into a ball, gently rocking while she sobbed into her arms. A white-haired heiress had her in her lap, gently stroking her back while whispering words of reassurance into her ear; to the side, however, was a rather displeased Archmage, torn between sending her back with a reprimand for disrupting her lesson, or casting a powerful calming spell on her to last the rest of the day. Some minds were better left untouched by the darker passions of the world until they grew a little older.

"I tried to warn you, Ruby," Weiss whispered into the girl's ear, prompting another loud whimper, "You're not like Yang. You wouldn't have found this amusing at all,"

"Yeah...look, even I couldn't get over how gross that Sanguine was when I read about his domain," Velvet added, shuddering, "Seriously? A god of drinking, partying and se-"

"I CAN HEAR YOU, YOU KNOW!" Ruby wailed, clamping her hands over her ears.

"...Yeah, alright. Ruby, are you _sure_ you want to stay here?"

A crack of lightning answered that question, and they all heard Valeria hiss loudly in disapproval. When Weiss looked up again, she saw a curious man in an almost violently purple patchwork suit striding out of a portal in the middle of the amphitheatre. "Sheogorath. Why are you here today? Haven't you done enough damage a few nights ago, in one of my classes?"

Weiss took a step back, as did Velvet. Sheogorath. The Daedric Prince of Madness? They'd heard from everyone in the Alchemy class about how a strange man coming out of a portal caused it to rain baked items.

"My dearest daughter, is that _really_ any way to greet your parent? Oh, don't answer that. It probably would be! I heard from my chamberlain that you invited Sanguine to a party!"

"The _party_ would be that in Miss Rose's head, Sheogorath," growled Valeria, pointing at the curled up girl, "She asked about the fate that befell my previous apprentice, and I related it to her. Suffice to say that she was not ready to accept the debauchery that follows every move of Sanguine,"

Sheogorath's ever persistent manic smile faded a little bit when he heard that bit of news. With a thunderous smack, the Daedric Prince slapped Valeria's cheek with extreme force, sending her tumbling to the ground. A bright flash of light enveloped Sheogorath; when it faded, there was a tall, white-furred leopard-like female Khajiit where he once stood.

And she was far from amused, if the way her bushy tail was puffed up was to go by.

"Stand up," this new Khajiit growled, raising a hand and lifting Valeria back to her feet with a telekinetic grab, "I am most disappointed in you, _daughter_. I had believed that Raminus had taught you better than to mention inappropriate topics to impressionable young ladies! Especially those that you may potentially consider your own apprentices, one of whom appears to be barely in bloom!"

Daughter? That was the same as Sheogorath had called Valeria before. This Khajiit was wearing the same shockingly purple and garishly gold patchwork as Sheogorath, though it was a loose robe with a flamboyantly fur-trimmed train rather than a suit. Was she really the Daedric Prince of Madness? Now that she thought about it, the other Khajiit was a spitting image of Valeria; only that the pattern on her fur was more pronounced, and the whites and greys of her pelt were much more vivid in colour, and luxuriously glossy and thick. Her eyes, however, were a vivid, intense green like J'Bari's, unlike the Archmage's fiery orange ones.

Valeria muttered an almost inaudible 'apologies', but her mother appeared to have no tolerance for that. Like a mother cat would a kitten, she hauled the Archmage up by the scruff of her neck and gave her a sharp flick on the tip of her ear. Which, to say the least, was an impressive feat; Ruby and Weiss were barely taller than Valeria's shoulders, and yet her mother was taller still.

"Apologies? No, an apology is not owed to _me_. It is to _her_ that you must apologise. No daughter of mine will shame the Septim bloodline by shirking apologies where it is due!"

Thoroughly chastised, Valeria limped over to Ruby and crouched down, gently placing a hand on Ruby's shoulder. "My most sincere apologies, young Miss Rose. I should have had the wisdom to say no more than was necessary,"

Ruby let out a sniffle, but nodded all the same. "S'okay, Miss...Professor...Uh...Archmage. I mean, I did ask...I should've listened to them. Urgh...I won't be able to look at Yang and Blake the same way again...eww...gross,"

"My lady, the cookies that you have requested have arrived," Sheogorath's servant droned, in that perpetually bored voice of his.

The man was holding up a lavish silver platter piled high with some perfectly golden brown cookies. The scent from them was utterly divine. Unlike the ones that had rained on the school a few days before, it was fairly obvious that these ones had been crafted with utmost care. There was not a crumb out of place, not a single flake of red crystallised fruit higher than another on the same cookie. It was odd, how the serious demeanour of the elder Khajiit seemed to vanish the moment that she saw the platter of tooth-rotting treats; within a few seconds, she had a manic grin on her face again, the very same that Sheogorath wore all the time.

Valeria's mother took two from the plate, putting one in her mouth before she approached Ruby and tapped her on her shoulder. "Care for one, young lady?" she offered, with a devilish smirk on her lips. Ruby, being the devourer of all things baked and covered in sugar, could hardly resist the offer and immediately scarfed down the offered food in less than a second. Her eyes rolled back in their sockets as she fell backwards into Weiss' lap, drooling in a blissful stupor.

Strawberries, sugar and sweet spices danced in a divine waltz on her tastebuds, enrobed in a succulent and rich biscuit base which melted into her mouth. Never again shall an inferior cookie made by a mere mortal touch her tongue, for she had tasted perfection itself.

"Ha! Her soul is mine, now!" whooped the Khajiit, clapping her hands and performing a ridiculous little jig on the spot. When Valeria glared at her, she tutted and shook her head, "You need to learn how to lighten up, my daughter! As touched by madness as my mind is, you know as well as I do that my pranks are harmless. Well, mostly. Probably almost all the time, now that I think about it. Except for when those foolish invaders attack. Then off to Execution Point they go! Several thousand feet in the air, of course; before dear old gravity goes on its merry way! Now, why don't you introduce me to your pupils? They seem all too eager to know me! Not the ones on your eyes, though I would say that would be very flattering indeed if they are,"

"Very well. As long as you...behave, mother," sighed Valeria, shaking her head, "Well, students; Miss Rose, Miss Schnee, Miss Scarlatina; I suppose that you have heard enough - and seen enough - to deduce that this is indeed my mother. This is Ra'shamarra, my mother; Lady of the Shivering Isles, Empress Mother of the Nirnian Empire...and as you have all seen, she _is_ Sheogorath, the Madgod. Which, I must say, is not a title that I am most fond of, though she has taken to it rather...well,"

"Oh, do be quiet. You're simply jealous that you don't have a split-coloured throne! It's fashionable, you know. Better than that gold and red Ruby Throne! Boring, boring, boring! But speaking of boredom, don't you have a class to run? Bore these young ladies some more, hm?"

Valeria looked at the three huntresses-in-training. Ruby had shaken herself free of a sugar-induced coma, though her eyes were lingering on the remaining cookies on the tray that Haskill was holding; Weiss appeared to be pleading with her to continue the lesson, while Velvet was rapidly taking photographs with her camera. With only one of the three students still interested in the disrupted class, Valeria supposed there was no way that she could continue.

But that did not mean that she was out of ideas. As annoyed as she was with Ra'shamarra disrupting her class, she had thought of a way to get back at her mother.

A field trip with the girls into the Shivering Isles, with no limits on how much destruction they could cause. Not that it would cause her mother any grief, of course, as a Daedric Prince could simply recreate what was destroyed in their own realm. But the Archmage never allowed a slight to remain unsettled, and this was one way to achieve both of her goals with one simple plan.

"Mother, I do suppose that you may create these portals wherever you wish?"

"M-hm. That's right. Bigger and better than your puny portals. Stronger and faster too,"

"But why would a portal need to go fast?" Ruby asked, confused; she was immediately silenced when Ra'shamarra held up another cookie. "Okay. They need to go fast. And they need to be strong. Can I have the cookie now?"

"I would ask you to refrain from bribing my students with sweets, mother," Valeria chided, though her mother simply blew a raspberry in response, eliciting a childish giggle from Ruby. "Well, I cannot say that I have not tried to change your ways. Still, I'm thinking that since the class was disrupted because of your arrival, you may be able to assist us in another way, as recompense for the disruption,"

"And what would that be? Oooh, let me guess. A strawberry torte, the size of a cartwheel?"

Weiss had to give Ruby a slap on the back of her head to stop her from drooling again.

"No, nothing of the sort. I was considering the possibility that perhaps we could discuss magickal theory while taking a nature walk in Mania. You were, after all, the previous Archmage before myself,"

"And a fine one I was, if I may say so myself!" laughed Ra'shamarra. "A jolly trip with my daughter and her not-quite-apprentices in my realm? I should be ashamed if I were to decline! Very well, my daughter; I accept your request. Let us be off, then; to Mania!"

* * *

A/N:

Ruby: I'd sell my soul for a whole cookie!

*Sheogorath appears with a cookie* You called?

ultima-owner: I'm pretty sure Weiss hates cookies (and sweets in general). I mean, you would be too if crumbs rained on your bunk every single night... . Getting melted chocolate spots out of white dresses must be a real pain, lol.

Well, looks like it's an odd family reunion with a third, fourth and fifth wheel! Except if you count Haskill, but that man's always in the background. Now, let's see if the field trip into Mania will go well for the girls. Remember folks, Greenmote is bad for your physical (and mental) health! Use in moderation!


	7. 07 - Field Tripping, Part Two

All three of the students found themselves gawking at the surreal beauty of the Shivering Isles when they stepped through the portal created by Ra'shamarra. It was night-time, and yet the skies were still bright, lit by a river of brilliant lilac stars and nebulous pink clouds. Giant mushrooms towered over the lush grass below, their caps glowing brightly as though each held a miniature sun within them. Fireflies danced in the cool night air, illuminating the cobblestone road that stretched on into the distance through fields of vibrantly-coloured flowers.

"It's so pretty!" Ruby squealed, dashing off to look closer at a shrub-sized rainbow-coloured mushroom.

"It really is, isn't it?" Velvet agreed, pointing her camera up and snapping off photos. One could wonder exactly how many photos she could keep inside that camera of hers, but she never truly gave a proper answer.

"Well, isn't that flattering! People that really know how to appreciate the art of my realm!" Ra'shamarra purred, closing the portal behind her after she and Valeria walked through, "After all, I crafted it just by thinking about what I want to see! Not what _you_ want to see, but it is gratifying knowing that someone else likes what I see. Welcome to Mania, my dears; the colourful half of my realm!"

A loud fart-like noise came from Ruby's direction; Weiss and Velvet spun around - to find Ruby on the ground, knocked over by the sudden burst of spores that came from the giant mushroom and coughing profusely.

"Oops. I forgot to mention that the mushrooms don't like to be touched! Who likes to be touched by strangers, anyway? Maybe I do, but maybe I don't. These mushrooms will throw spores in your face if you touch them,"

"Are they...harmful?" Weiss asked, helping her teammate up. Ruby had a strange look on her face, though she seemed _slightly_ better after giving herself a shake.

"Yeah, I think I'm alright. Just...hmm...what's that smell..." Ruby murmured, sniffing the air noisily. The heiress had an urge to flinch away when Ruby started to sniff earnestly around her; without warning, however, the redhead buried her face in the heiress' hair, wrapping her arms tightly around the older girl in a bone-crushing hug.

"You smell really nice, Weiss! Mmm...is that vanilla...?" she whispered dreamily into Weiss' ear. With a grunt, Weiss wrestled slightly out of Ruby's death grip, twisting around just enough so that she could face the girl. From such a close distance, she could see that Ruby's eyes were clouded and unfocused; she recoiled when she saw a trail of drool coming from the girl's lips.

"Ruby, what in Dust's name are you doing!" screeched Weiss as the girl lunged forward without warning, licking her from neck to lower jaw, "Get off me, you dolt!"

"Well, well, this is new! I knew that Mania residents would use the spores of a mushroom tree to heighten their senses. I know that my dear Duke of Mania himself uses it to boost the taste of his dishes to untold new heights!" Ra'shamarra cackled gleefully, watching Ruby's antics with no small amount of amusement in her twinkling eyes. "I must say, this use of it I haven't seen before. And it pleases me greatly! Don't mind me, girls, I'm just watching. Ah, to be young and in love!"

Valeria shook her head disapprovingly and tapped her staff twice on the ground, releasing a pulse of golden energy. As soon as it washed over Ruby, Weiss could see that the clouded look in her eyes immediately vanished.

The younger girl's eyes widened when she realised the tip of her tongue was still on Weiss' neck. Mortified, she slowly backed away, blushing furiously. "Uh...I'm sorry, Weiss! I don't know what came over me. Honest!"

"And that is why you don't touch anything that you shouldn't!" Weiss hissed, taking out a white handkerchief and wiping down the saliva that was on her neck, "Ugh, I'm really going to have to wash this off later. Repeatedly. You and I are going to have a talk back in the dorm tonight about this!"

A series of rapid clicking noises caught her attention. Velvet was in the background with her camera, apparently having snapped off quite a few photographs while they were not watching. "Oh, come on! Not you too, Velvet!" she sighed in exasperation, "Delete those photos. Now!"

"As much as taking those photographs would be amusing to you, Miss Scarlatina, I do believe that Miss Schnee and Miss Rose have a right to privacy," Valeria said, nodding sympathetically to Weiss, "It would be proper as a fellow student and friend to delete those images,"

Velvet pouted, but did as she was asked to. "B-But they were so cute!"

"Yes, yes, they were. Trust my spoilsport of a daughter to ruin everyone's fun. Speaking of fun, I'm already bored. And a bored madgod is not something you wish to see. Ever. So if we're going to walk, then let's walk towards New Sheoth Palace. Right now. No more dallying. Unless you want me to summon a horde of Gnarls. A horde of very angry Gnarls,"

As if on cue, a loud creaking noise coming from a nearby bush startled Weiss, who immediately drew Myrtenaster from its sheath. What looked like a small living, animated tree scuttled out of the bush and into the tall grass. The only thing that she could see of it was its crown of colourful autumn leaves – which, on closer inspection, seemed to be interspersed with green, staring eyeballs.

Eyeballs that were looking straight at her.

With an angry roar, the animated tree walked towards the group – at a slow pace that only a moving tree could possibly achieve – while flinging all manner of fireballs, icy spears and thunderbolts from its barren boughs.

"Eep!" Weiss cried out, startled when a fireball flew close enough to her cheek that she could feel the heat. An icy spear smacked into her hand soon after. If it were not for her Aura, she was certain that the icy projectile would have pierced it straight through. Even so, the impact knocked Myrtenaster straight out of her hand – sailing right into Valeria's own outstretched hand.

"This will be a good test of how much you have learned of your magickal lessons, Miss Schnee," Valeria hummed, tucking the rapier into her belt, "You have learned everything that you need to defeat this juvenile Gnarl. Go ahead and defeat it; Miss Rose, Miss Scarlatina; you may assist as well,"

"Bloodsports? Why, this is most unlike you, my daughter! But I do approve of your methods. Shall I add more Gnarls?"

"NO!" Weiss and Ruby yelped, dodging a flurry of thunderbolts. Ruby responded by throwing a stream of flame at the living plant. The dry wood in its limbs immediately caught fire, causing it to shriek in pain for a moment. That was, until its entire body began to glow red, and what flames were on it immediately vanished. Velvet conjured a wolf familiar, ordering it to restrain the Gnarl as she threw small fireballs at it as fast as she could.

Not that fire seemed to do anything to it. To the huntresses' dismay, whatever flame that they could conjure seemed to be dispersed before it even touched the Gnarl, leaving it unharmed.

"Weiss! Fire isn't doing anything!" Ruby cried out, ducking as a fireball sailed over her head. She then noticed that Velvet's wolf familiar was managing to tear chunks of bark from the creature's skin, along with a few shreds of wood from its roots. "Weiss!" she yelled, getting an idea, "Bring out your doggy! Velvet's one is working on it!"

"A wolf familiar, Miss Rose," Valeria corrected her, stopping a fireball with an energy shield.

"Yeah! That one! Whatever!"

"A...wolf familiar? Of course!"

Weiss gathered a ball of purple energy in her hand, reaching out for a wolf. She felt it respond to her call, and soon it burst out of a small portal in front of her, joining Velvet's own familiar in a double attack on the Gnarl. With two of its three roots held by the familiars, it could no longer move; instead, it thrashed its branches about in a vain effort to shake its attackers off.

"Well done, students. Now, finish it off," Valeria said calmly. "I will give you a hint, just this once. If an enemy appears to resist all that you throw at it, perhaps you must seek a different solution,"

"A different solution...?" Weiss murmured. The plant deflected every last bit of fire that they had thrown at it, and it was even now throwing back quite a barrage of fireballs and embers. But it had certainly stopped hurling thunderbolts and bits of razor-sharp ice.

Ice.

Her eyes widened as she realised the solution. For once, she was glad that she had taken Yang's introductory Destruction spellbook and read a few chapters ahead. Reaching out for the coldest, bitterest wintry chill that she could remember, she formed an icy javelin in her hands and threw it as hard as she could into the Gnarl. Unlike the fire that they had thrown before, the icy spear pierced clean through the creature's midsection, where it promptly shattered into a hundred razor-sharp blades that tore through its wooden body. It shuddered and twitched, eventually falling still; liquid amber poured out through the hole in its torso like blood, pooling about its 'feet'.

"Oh, splendid. Most splendid!" Ra'shamarra laughed, clapping excitedly, "How most delightful! It appears that you do indeed have promise. I promise you indeed that you do have promise. After all, it isn't every day that a Gnarl is slain by mere novices. Wouldn't you say so, daughter?"

"While I would not phrase it so...inefficiently...yes, I would say that you all have promise, Miss Schnee, Miss Rose, Miss Scarlatina. A very well executed attack. Miss Rose and Miss Schnee, I do believe that Miss Belladonna is a student of Alchemy. If you would collect the Gnarl's ichor-" Valeria said, reaching into her robes and handing them a large crystal bottle with a cork stopper, "-as well as the bark and amber, I have little doubt that she would be most appreciative. The ichor is a potent ingredient for healing physical ailments, while the powdered bark is particularly effective for potions that shield the drinker from harmful magicks,"

"Oooh. That sounds useful," Ruby gasped, snatching the bottle out of Weiss' hands and promptly zooming off to collect the ichor from the dead Gnarl, "What's the amber for?"

"Amber? Amber's used for jewelry. And hammers. And swords," Ra'shamarra spoke, grinning madly, "All sorts of sharp and pointy and bashy things. Here, why don't you take a look? Auntie Sheogorath always has gifts for those that entertain her!"

A puff of white smoke shrouded Weiss' left hand, and suddenly she found herself with a very strange rapier. The handle was of white leather, and there was an elaborate basket hilt made of silver filigree, gracefully sweeping up into the blade. The gaps in the filigree were filled with golden glass-like material, the same as that which formed the razor-sharp blade. A flurry of rose petals later and suddenly Weiss found herself with one less rapier – and one overly-excitable team leader playing with one more rapier, cooing over it like she would to an adorable kitten.

That was, until the dolt accidentally cut her finger with its edge. A pained yelp later – and a burst of uncontrolled magicka directed through the handle – and the blade lit up with dozens of intricate runes along its entire length. A burst of frost immediately covered the blade, which was now so cold as to be covered in a permanent icy mist.

"Oh, an eager one, isn't she? Well, we'll have to fix that!"

Another puff of white smoke around Ruby's hands, and the rapier vanished, reappearing in Weiss' hand. A sad whine came from Ruby, who put up her best impression of a kicked puppy, drawing a loud belly laugh from Ra'shamarra.

"I say, that was a jolly good impression! So good, in fact, that I've decided to not skip rope with you yet," she chuckled, running a fluffy hand through Ruby's hair, "You've made my day as well. What's a bit of fun between folks, eh? Daughter; a change of plans. You and I, as well as these young ladies, are going to join me for dinner in New Sheoth Palace! No buts, no take backs. You are all coming!"

"These young ladies are in the middle of a class! A disrupted class, because of your interference, _mother_ , but they are still in a class!" Valeria growled, slowly losing her patience. Weiss swore to herself that she was not seeing things when the ground around the Archmage started to be coated in a rather thick layer of frost, with all the plants around her wilting from the sudden cold. Whatever the case, she scooted slightly away from Valeria, hoping that her temper would not explode violently.

"Ah-ah! I don't think so. Not any more. Wouldn't you say? What was it? Velvet?"

The bunny-faunus in question jumped when she realised that she was being addressed by Sheogorath. Slowly, she lowered her camera, looking longingly at the many colourful things that she hadn't photographed yet. Only when she heard the angry sigh of a disappointed Archmage did she realise that class was, indeed, not over yet; though it appeared that Valeria had conceded that she was not going to regain control of it. At least for that day.

"Fine. I suppose I haven't spoken with you properly in years, mother. But I will have to demand that you rein back the tendencies that The Mantling has imposed on you. It is difficult for me to keep my temper in check when I see such...frivolity,"

Ra'shamarra clutched at her heart mockingly. "How boring! But if that is what it will take to get a good mother-daughter talk happening, then I'll do it. With these adorable children in tow, of course,"

"Uh...does that mean that class is dismissed?" Velvet asked uncertainly, sharing a look with the other huntresses-in-training. She recoiled when Valeria gave her a withering glare.

"No. This lesson is not over yet," Valeria spoke, looking at both Velvet and Weiss and giving them both a vicious smirk. The Empress always had the last laugh. "New Sheoth is a fair distance away. Approximately an hour's walk on good roads...and I am sure that it can be _plagued_ with hostile creatures. You will demonstrate your mastery over the basics of Conjuration by warding off any attacking creatures with your familiar. Or familiars, if you believe that you can manage to bring forth more than one. I do believe that you can assist me with...encouraging them, mother?"

Sheogorath simply offered her best wicked grin in response. She snapped her fingers once; twice; three times. All three of the huntresses, afterwards, gulped in fear when they heard the tell-tale creaking and rumbling of Gnarl roots approaching behind them.

"Well, I daresay I am can, my daughter! Let us see how nimble your young apprentices truly are!"

* * *

Meanwhile, back at the Team RWBY dorms...

"You know, I wonder where Weiss and Ruby are," Blake said to Yang, looking at the clock on the wall. It was nearly time for dinner. "I'm pretty sure the Conjuration class was only meant to run until four in the afternoon,"

"Bet they're having totally too much fun in that class," grumbled Yang. Her stomach gave a loud rumble, and her head drooped. "I'm starving, but I don't wanna leave my little sister behind,"

* * *

"You didn't tell us that there was a _mountain pass_ that we needed to climb through!" gasped Ruby, staggering up the marble stairs to New Sheoth Palace. Valeria and Ra'shamarra were both floating as they travelled quickly, suspended on repulsor fields fuelled by magicka, smirking smugly at the exhausted and dishevelled huntresses-in-training.

"No, I did not. And is it not part of your training to handle every situation that arises, even if it is unexpected?" Valeria asked, giving them all a smug smile, "Come now, do not give me that look. I admit, the methods may have been harsh, but do you now feel that you are much more capable at bringing forth your own conjured creatures?"

"No, definitely not," Weiss said, still wheezing and panting. They had sprinted for their lives the whole way to a colourful city called Bliss, which for once seemed to be aptly-named as it gave them a blissful respite from being chased by an angry horde of Gnarls. Their familiars provided a distraction as they ran; time and time again they had to cast it as each wolf was overwhelmed under a rolling tide of living brambles and thorny vine-whips. "How is casting repeatedly while being chased by creatures supposed to improve our ability to cast spells? We're supposed to be learning this in a classroom!"

"If you truly believe that, Miss Schnee, do try to conjure as many wolves as you can now. Do not stop between each one. If you cannot produce more than two before exhausting your reserves, then I shall owe you a necklace with the finest of rubies in it," Valeria retorted, smirking as she handed Weiss her Myrtenaster back.

With an indignant huff, Weiss set about bringing the wolves into reality as she was asked. One popped out of the aether; and then two – then three, and then four...

...Until she eventually ended up with eight wolves, all lined up in front of her. She stared incredulously at her hands, which still had enough energy to bring forth a brightly glowing flame.

"As you can well see, Miss Schnee; the training that I have provided has produced results, and I have saved myself the expenses of having to procure a ruby necklace for you. Now, while I hate to be rude, I do believe that my nose finds all three of you to be rather drenched in sweat, and that it is not a particularly attractive scent. Mother, has Haskill prepared the baths for them?"

"I am right here, Lady Valeria Septim," Sheogorath's butler droned, popping out of the air behind Valeria, "And yes, the baths are ready. Quite a novel way of informing myself of your needs, my lady; sending a conjured eagle as a messenger nearly sent some of the Golden Saints into a frenzy,"

"I do not trust that mother would send a message in time. After all, letting my students stew in their own sweaty heat would probably bring her a smile, which is all the more reason for her to not have you prepare a bath. Now, if you would please lead these three to the baths, I would greatly appreciate it, Haskill,"

"Indeed. I suppose I shall also have to find them a...change of clothes,"

"How perceptive of you. Yes, of course they will also require some fresh clothes," Valeria groaned, shaking her head. Sometimes, her mother's butler could be so infuriatingly dull.

"And make sure that you give them the finest dresses that Mania has to offer!" shouted Ra'shamarra at the butler's retreating back, "After all, there is a feast about to start. A feast in our honour! Or was it just yours? Or mine? I can't tell. But does it really matter? Let us get to the dining hall, immediately!"

After Ruby, Weiss and Velvet had bathed – an experience that was awkward for at least two of them, who had never been waited on by chambermaids as they bathed – the girls walked uncertainly into the dining hall in their new dresses. Ruby was ecstatic when she first looked at the voluminous black silk dress that she received; embroidered with elegant rose gold thread in an intricate pattern of roses and delicate leaves, a bright red satin sash with a giant ribbon on its back holding the dress together, it was the very image of a dress that she could never have imagined to wear in her lifetime. Weiss received a similar dress in white, decorated with patterns of sapphire snowflakes.

The dining hall was a clash of colours. Half was a riot of bright colours, while the other half was dull and dreary with blacks, greys and purples dominating the scene. Even the linen table spread was split in half as far as the colours were concerned; one half a bright, cheerful red, while the other half was a gloomy dark purple. And at the head of the table was an amused mad Khajiit, slowly clapping while grinning widely, with her daughter sitting pensively beside her.

"These dresses are so pretty! Can we keep them?" Ruby asked Ra'shamarra excitedly; Weiss rolled her eyes in the background, hoping that their host would not take offence to the rather poorly worded question.

"Those dresses? Why, if you liked them so much, you can have three! Or six. Or was it a dozen that you asked for?" giggled the slightly insane Khajiit, "Of course you can have it! I'm the Madgod, see; I can just create more if I snap my fingers! Never mind where they come from, I just know they come when I want them to,"

"That's...handy," Velvet said, walking in behind Ruby and Weiss in her own black-and-red dress, "I was wondering how these dresses fit so well. It's like they were made to fit our size,"

"Yes, yes. I can make them smaller. Or bigger. Or any size, really," Ra'shamarra chuckled, waving the praise off, "But that's enough for now. Come, have a seat. I'm sure that you're all starving after the long walk that my daughter put you all through. Haskill! Haskill? Where is that scamp?"

"I am here, my lady. And the last time I checked in the mirror, I was not a scamp. Is there something you require?"

"Oh, good! You're here. Our guests are hungry, and there is no food on the table. This is a feasting table, without a feast! What good is it, hm? Unless you were to put food on it. And that is not a question, by the by. Bring up the feast from the kitchen, and the finest wines and ales too!"

"It will be done," the butler replied, vanishing down one of the side corridors. When Ruby's stomach growled loudly, she realised something about the time.

"Uh...Archmage?" asked Ruby. The Khajiit in question raised an eyebrow. "What time is it now in Beacon?"

Casting a quick divining spell, Valeria replied, "It is currently around the time which your fellows have dinner in Beacon's cafeteria,"

"Could we...bring Yang and Blake here? It seems wrong if we just left them,"

"They are not part of-"

"Nonsense!" yelled Sheogorath, causing Valeria's ears to flatten to her skull, "Friends ought not to be left alone! It is madness! Wait, if it is madness, then perhaps I should leave them be. Leave them to starve, waiting for you? No, but that would be cruel. And I don't like being cruel without a reason. Ruby, where are they?"

"They should be back in my room in Beacon,"

"Great! Now let me just read your mind, and I'll get them riiiight here...hm...oh, yes. Okay. Yes, I see them,"

* * *

"Hey, Blake, you smell anything weird in here?" Yang asked, sniffing the air. "Something smells like...cabbages...and cheese..."

"I smell fresh balls of yarn," Blake replied, earning her a strange look from Yang. "What? Just because I'm a cat faunus, you think I like playing with balls of yarn?"

Before she could come up with a witty reply, Yang was immediately silenced by a deafening shout.

"YOU TWO ARE INVITED TO MY FEAST! STEP THROUGH THE PORTAL!"

"...Ow. Could that get any louder?" Yang muttered, her ears still ringing. A purple portal was shimmering on the door of their dorm room, revealing a rather lavishly-decorated hall on the other side. Ruby's face popped out of the side of the portal, smiling happily as her hand scratched a spectral wolf behind the ears.

"Hey, Yang, Blake! Come on through, Archmage Septim's mother invited us to dinner!" the girl said cheerfully, followed by a happy bark from the wolf.

"I thought you were in detention or something, Rubes! What the hell?" Yang replied, her eyes flashing red. How dare her sister get into this event without letting her know! Her anger at being left alone to starve soon faded, however, when she saw an entire succulent roast pig get hauled in by a pair of servants in the background. "...On second thought, I'm in. Come on, Blakey, I'm sure they can find you a giant fish,"

* * *

A/N:

Well, looks like Ruby had her first...field 'trip'. *crickets chirping*...That was Yang. I swear it D:

Nope, no Dementia for the girls. At least, they won't be going down there voluntarily. Valeria would have an aneurysm thinking about what form of dark madness would plague them afterwards, if they ever did so.

Mangahero: I wouldn't say it is a 'never', but perhaps on the scale of things, it would rate below 'once in a blue moon in a solar eclipse'. There are ~1700 years of Valeria's vampiric life to go through, and that's an awful lot of storytelling...

Also, just acquired Dark Souls 3 w/ season pass. I'd have to say that every time I see Sister Friede, I keep thinking that this is somehow the love child of the WhiteRose pair. Even the weapons that can be forged from the soul (a giant scythe, or a bunch of bleed-inducing roses) seals the deal.


	8. 08 - Glorious Ball of Yarn

A week had passed since the rather memorable feast with Ra'shamarra, and Team RWBY (plus Velvet) could never look at Beacon Academy's cafeteria offerings in the same way ever again.

Especially since the elder Khajiit seemed to take a shine to Ruby, after the latter had started to dance and sing drunkenly after unknowingly drinking a glass of very sweet (but highly alcoholic) strawberry liquor. Ra'shamarra (who had insisted that she be called Auntie Sheogorath outside of private areas) had given each of them a strange ring shaped like a twisted bramble with a laughing three-faced head on it, which allowed them to create a portal back to her palace at any time by simply rubbing it. And that meant that all of them had access to the delectable foods that came from the palace kitchens, if they asked for it.

"I wish term wouldn't end so quickly," sighed Weiss, looking at the clock on the wall of their dorm, "There is still so much I want to learn from Archmage Septim...and I really don't want to go back to Atlas for the break, but my father is demanding that I do. What are you all going to do for the entire break?"

Yang shrugged. "I'm going back to Patch. I miss dad and Zwei. And I kinda want to start working on my motorbike too, you know. Blake, you don't have anywhere to go for this break, don't you? Why don't you come with me and Rubes back to Patch?"

Ruby gagged and spat out a bit of water that she was drinking. "Ugh, do I really need want to know?" she whined, causing both Blake and Yang to roll their eyes.

Ever since Valeria had decided to give her a crash course about the 'birds and the bees' – using Sanguine's exploits as a terrible, terrible starting point – she had been very touchy whenever Blake and Yang's relationship was brought up. It was no secret that they were dating, at least between the rest of Team RWBY and Team JNPR, but after Valeria had given Ruby 'the (improper) talk', it was impossible for either of them to even hold hands without Ruby thinking that there was something less than savoury behind the scenes.

"No, you don't. Not right now, anyway, but I think it might happen soon," Yang said, half-jokingly, "I mean, I can see the way you look at Weiss when you think she's not looking, you know. Give it a couple of months and-"

She didn't get to finish that sentence as two pillows smacked her in the face. Both Weiss and Ruby were a brilliant scarlet in the face; Weiss' wolf familiar was out and its hackles were raised, snarling angrily at Yang.

"...Yeah, I think I'll drop it now," she finished, shaking her head. "Anyway, the offer's still there, Blake. If Ruby's worried about us doing...things...I'll just sleep on the couch and you can have my bed,"

"If it's too much trouble, I'll find somewhere else to stay over the break. You shouldn't need to do something like that," Blake replied.

"No, it's no trouble at all. It's just that Rubes seems to have weird ideas running through her head at the moment," Yang sighed, shooting a glare at her apologetic sister, "We'll have to find a way to work that out of her sometime. I mean, come on, Rubes; you've told us about that story that the Archcat has told you before, at least twelve times already. Not every man's out to...do things like that, you know. Or every woman, if you swing that way,"

"How did we even get here?" Weiss grumbled, burying her tomato-red face in her hands, "Let's just stop this discussion before it gets even weirder. How about J'Bari? Have you any plans for the coming break?"

"This one believes that this one's mistress has found a way to return back to her homeworld with the aid of Sheogorath," J'Bari answered, "But this one is required to assist with the construction of a larger, more stable portal back to her home realm today,"

"Oh. Well, it's Saturday, so we don't have anything on. You know..." said Yang, tapping her chin, "You've really helped us along with this magic business for like, every single lesson's homework, and we haven't really done much to pay you back..."

"So we'll help you out!" finished Ruby.

"J'Bari is grateful, but J'Bari must ask her mistress for permission first,"

The Khajiit took out her scroll and tapped out a message to Valeria, which was replied to after half a minute. "This one is pleased to inform you that Her Majesty has granted you permission to assist. This one warns you, however, that there will be much fighting involved. You must wear your combat gear and have your weapons at the ready,"

Ruby looked at Yang, who smacked a fist into her other hand in excitement; and then at Blake and Weiss, who both nodded apprehensively. "Alright. Team RWBY, let's help them out!"

* * *

Near the outdoor amphitheatre that was the magickal arts classroom, a horde of storm and ice atronachs were busy erecting a gigantic marble obelisk. The stone spire stretched high into the sky; glowing red runes were inscribed all over its surface, radiating power from its glowing tip. Valeria stood back with her eyes closed in concentration, making motions with her fingers as she directed the atronachs with her will. After a minute of the gigantic summoned creatures hauling the monumental structure into position,

"Now, I heard that you needed a lot of space for the construction of a transplanar gateway, but I'm not sure that Beacon Academy needs a monument," Ozpin said, walking to her side with Glynda following closely behind him. She did not appear pleased with the amount of grass that had been cleared for construction work; a circle that was almost fifty metres in radius had been paved with clean white marble almost overnight, and ringed with many smaller stone obelisks on the outside edge. Curious students walked around the edge of the portal, wary of the dozens of fully-armoured Dremora guardsmen patrolling it.

"I assure you that this is not merely a monument. A transplanar portal anchor requires a magickally stable substrate to resist the tremendous magickal flux required to hold the interplanar breach. While silver and steel work exceptionally well as materials for magickal foci, they are not as abundant in Beacon as stone is. Monolithic stone, thankfully, qualifies as a stable substrate," Valeria calmly explained, huffing as she released the atronachs back into Oblivion, "That, and I daresay it is much more pleasing to the eye than a tall archway of metal,"

"Well, at least you've picked a place that's out of the way," Glynda snarked, sparing a glance at Beacon Academy in the distance. Valeria nodded back.

"Indeed. Now, I was informed by my apprentice that Team RWBY is volunteering to assist with the final phase of preparation before I breach the liminal barriers separating our worlds for the first time in history,"

As if on cue, the portal in the amphitheatre flashed five times, and she could see that all of Team RWBY – plus her apprentice – had stepped out, wearing their combat gear as instructed, and had their weapons out and ready. "Good. It appears that they are all present.

"Why are they in combat equipment and carrying their weapons?" asked Ozpin curiously, noting that Ruby's weapon now had bright orange runes etched into its barrel.

"That is because creating a breach in the liminal barriers of a plane is highly dangerous," Valeria said darkly, "In the endless void that is Oblivion, any manner of hostile creature may appear from the rift until it is stabilised. For this reason, I have decided to place the portal in a location where minimal collateral damage can be expected,"

Ozpin raised an eyebrow warily. "How dangerous are the creatures that we speak of? And didn't you say that you were missing something that you needed to maintain this portal's stability?"

"I had believed that an Aedric artifact – an artifact of the gods, if you will – was required to maintain the portal's stability. It appears, however, that any artifact of divinity would suffice; even from other pantheons of gods. I have with me a Great Sigil Stone, which one of our less-favoured gods has granted for my use,"

She pulled out a violently pink ball of yarn from a bag on her belt.

"Is this it?" Ozpin murmured in disbelief, closely examining the unassuming ball of yarn.

"You cannot be serious. _This_ is considered an artifact? A ball of pink woollen yarn?" Glynda added, looking at Valeria as though she had gone mad.

Only when Valeria channelled some magicka into it did it react; a web of glowing violet lines bursting to life all over its surface, along with innumerable minuscule runes and glyphs seemingly inscribed over every last bit of thread in the ball. When Ozpin reached out to it, the energy contained within reacted with his Aura, releasing a powerful pulse of energy rushing across the entire clearing.

"Incredible. So much energy, contained in something so small...and unassuming," the professor murmured, half-tempted to try and touch the yarn again.

"If you are curious, then you may watch the ritual, Headmaster. But I must warn you that touching a Daedric artifact without proper precautions is highly hazardous to one's health and sanity," Valeria spoke, quickly wrapping the woollen ball with the sleeve of her robes, "Now, J'Bari, Team RWBY; if you are here to assist, please listen carefully to what I have to say,"

"Yep! We're ready to help you, miss!"

"Very good, Miss Rose. Now, I will warn you that the creatures that may be called here during the ritual may be very powerful, and very dangerous. I will ask that you destroy each one with great prejudice, no matter how harmless it might look,"

"How...harmless it might look?" Weiss mouthed, looking at J'Bari for some clarification. The apprentice Khajiit merely shrugged and shook her head.

"I will tell you that one time that I was establishing a portal pair between two ends of my empire, there appeared a rabbit. One that possessed teeth of hardest adamantine, and paired with the instinct to use them as a veteran soldier would a sword. In addition to this, it was possessed of a most vicious spirit, leaping at every person that came close and killing him or her within seconds,"

"A rabbit. Really?" Yang groaned, "Please tell me that was really a joke,"

"I assure you, Miss Xiao Long, that the rabbit was indeed real, and that it was not a joke. The Fifth Legion lost a hundred good men that day," she said flatly, glaring at Yang for not taking her story seriously. "Now, I do suppose that I must tell the students to return to their dorms unless they are inclined to fight on my behalf. Headmaster, if you would be so kind as to inform those them to depart for the safety of the academy, I would be much obliged,"

"I think that most of the students here would be capable of running if they do not wish to fight," Ozpin shrugged, taking another sip of his coffee.

"Very well. Then we shall begin. J'Bari, Team RWBY; I trust that you will keep me safe for the entirety of the ritual,"

Gripping her staff tightly, Valeria slowly walked into the circle of small obelisks. Bluish-white flames erupted from the top of each one as she touched them, until they were all lit. When they were, she ventured to the stone altar in front of the large central obelisk. A large purple glyph appeared in the centre of the altar, glowing menacingly with power. She placed the ball of yarn on the glyph, which devoured the yarn's energy within seconds. Now sufficiently powered, the entire floor was strewn with arcane glyphs and symbols; words of power inscribed within circles and lines, glowing brightly with energy.

"Daedra, spawn of Padomay's black blood; thy will is naught but ash in the wake of thy sovereign's voice. Heed my words, and obey!" Valeria roared, gathering magickal power in her staff. The sun, which was up till then beating mercilessly down on the group, darkened as she shouted out those words. Storm clouds gathered overhead, releasing a few thunderbolts to the ground below. There even appeared to be rain coming down; but when Ozpin held out his hand to feel one, he realised that it was not water, but ash.

A shackle of energy lashed out from the altar and latched on to Valeria's free hand. "By the power vested in myself by the blood coursing within my veins, I command thee; let the Veil be pierced once more!"

Extending her vampiric fangs, she strained and brought her shackled hand up to her mouth, before biting down on the back of her wrist. A trickle of dark red blood stained her white fur, dripping down onto the altar. On absorbing the blood, the purple glyph flashed and then released another pulse of energy, sending a bolt of light into the sky where it tore a great gash into the sky above, drawing shrill panicked screams from several of the nearby students.

"This one suggests that her friends be ready for hostiles," J'Bari whispered to Team RWBY, who gave stiff nods and readied their weapons.

"As the Et'Ada gave birth to Aurbis, the Great Void and the all the Planes, so shalt their descendants reshape it in what manner they please," growled Valeria, straining to hold her bleeding hand still over the glyph before her, "I, the last descendant of hallowed Aedric blood, invoke my ancestral rights. Let the Veil fall to my will. Let the Void part where I desire it to part. Let the two Planes that I seek be joined in union, bridged by artifice of mortal hands and consecrated by the spilled blood and flesh of the immortals!"

The sun was by now completely blotted out, casting the entire clearing into darkness. Ash fell steadily from the storm clouds above, forming a coating much like sickly snow below; thunder, fire and ice hailed from above, pelting those in the area with deadly projectiles. What few students remained began to flee towards the safety of Beacon Academy as fast as their legs could carry them.

A faint outline of a giant ring, perhaps half a mile across, began to materialise in the sky high above them all. Slowly, it began to morph into something more solid. A white marble ring, floating in the sky; suspended by enormous cyan crystals, and lavishly adorned by gold. The rift in its centre widened and widened, until eventually the entire ring was filled with a chaotically swirling mass of pink and purple.

"Here they come!" shouted J'Bari, unsheathing her sword when three balls of flaming purple descended from the contained rift. Three crystalline giants landed hard on the ritual circle, sending tremors through the ground. Two were immediately set upon by the summoned Dremora that were already present, while the third one turned on Team RWBY and J'Bari. "Ice atronachs! Take them down!"

"Yang! Fireballs!" Ruby yelled, prompting the blonde brawler to begin punching the atronach with Burn Dust-enhanced shells, breaking chunks of ice away from its body. "That's not what I meant!"

"Close enough!"

Ruby was firing Crescent Rose as fast as she could into its thick legs, chipping away at its joints with powerful fire-enchanted rounds. Blake and Weiss rushed forward; the cat faunus using Gambol Shroud to tear away at the atronach's other leg, while Weiss gathered her magicka in one hand, preparing the hottest flames that she could create. Despite their best efforts, however, the ice atronach was still moving, lumbering angrily towards Ruby.

"Shields up! Shields up!" yelled J'Bari, noticing that the atronach had lifted a fist wreathed in ice. Ruby fired Crescent Rose into the ground, vaulting herself well over the creature's head; a large icy crater had been smashed into the stone where she once stood.

"That was close!" gasped Ruby, landing on the edge of the ritual circle. The elemental was now trading blows with Yang, who seemed to be able to match it punch-for-punch. A pained shriek marked the end of one of the other atronachs, defeated by Valeria's summoned Dremora; another followed soon after, making Team RWBY's one the only one still standing. A slip on the ash-covered stone, however, caused Yang to mistime her block; her eyes widened as a gigantic fist rushed towards her from above, pounding her into the stone floor.

"Yang!" Ruby shouted, horrified. The blonde brawler lay motionless on the ground, pinned by the enormous elemental creature's fist. She aimed her rifle at its elbow, hoping that another shot would be able to stagger it or sever its arm; but a most uncharacteristic yell filled her ears before she could fire a shot.

"Nobody harms my teammates and leaves unpunished!" the heiress screamed, producing a torrent of white-hot flames focused to a single needle-like point, directed at the atronach's midsection. She swiped her hand and the single blade of flame sliced straight through the atronach, causing its upper half to slide off, completely cut off from its lower half.

"Oh wow, that was AWESOME, Weiss!" squealed Ruby as she dashed forward to help Yang up. The remains of the atronach slowly crumbled into icy dust, which Blake quickly scooped up into a glass jar she carried on her belt.

"Do I really want to know what you want to do with that, Blake?" groaned Weiss after she let the flame in her hand die down.

"Well...you know,"

"The entire team knows. Dust, probably the entire academy, after that accident. Just...don't blow up our room, please. I've put my Dust inside a locked steel box, but that doesn't mean that it's safe from an explosion. Like last time,"

Blake flushed a bright scarlet at the reminder. She had picked a strange plant called a 'flame stalk' from the alchemy garden one day, and then mixed it with some Fire Dust in her portable essence extractor. Needless to say, the resultant fiery explosion was nothing short of spectacular, eclipsing even Ruby's mishap at the start of the term. Bits of burning bed were blasted out into the corridor, and every last one of her books had been blown to bits, their charred pages thrown out the window; she was certain that more than a few students saw more than they needed to of her books of 'fine literature'.

"Father Akatosh, with thine blessing, let this bridge between our worlds be bound by thine protection. Let the Veil reform, with the aid of Aetherius, so that the horrors of the Great Void be barred from ever infesting this realm. I entreat thee, as thy daughter many generations removed, to aid me in this task!"

A sound like a thunderclap shook the entire area, and the students gawked at the slowly-rotating ring above them. The chaotic pink mass inside the portal ring was starting to become less solid, and slower in its swirling motions. Valeria's entire body was glowing blue and emitting sparks of azure flame as she channelled enormous amounts of magicka into the ritual circle, whose runes by now were glowing a blinding white.

"This one believes that there should be little time until the ritual is fully completed," J'Bari said. The Khajiit was still standing stiff and tense, her sword raised. "Maintain your guard. This one thinks something is coming. Something...big. Something extremely deadly,"

Sure enough, a large pink ball of flame descended from the portal, slamming into the ritual circle like the atronachs did. But when the flames surrounding it cleared, Team RWBY could not help but burst out laughing.

It was a small, fluffy white rabbit, sniffing curiously at the air. When it turned to face Team RWBY though, J'Bari shivered at the sight of its malicious, demonic eyes. Even the summoned Dremora lords were cowering in fear, running away as far as they could from it without leaving the circle.

A sentiment which, it seemed, was not shared by the Team RWBY.

"Aww, it's so cute. Can we keep it?" cooed Ruby, in love with the idea of keeping such an adorable rabbit.

And thus ensued the most epic battle of all time, to be remembered by Beacon Academy as the day when Team RWBY was soundly beaten up by a white, fluffy rabbit from the depths of hell.

* * *

"Right. Bad idea. No keeping the evil fluffy white bunny," Ruby groaned, nursing a thoroughly broken and bruised arm in the outdoor amphitheatre while Valeria walked through the portal back to the alchemy lab to create a healing potion. She had patched up most of the minor cuts and scratches herself with a lesser curative spell, but Valeria insisted that she hold off from attempting to mend broken bones for now.

The ritual had been completed successfully, and the established transplanar gate was now floating high in the sky, showing a brilliant pink sunrise with two moons visible in the background. The sky had also returned to normal, with the unnatural ash clouds vanishing with the completion of the ritual.

"This one will say that this one has warned you before the battle," replied J'Bari stoically, casting a healing spell over numerous deep cuts that covered Blake's arms.

Weiss had healed herself for the most part, though her normally pristine white combat skirt was ripped in sections and her jacket was in tatters. She fumed as she thought about the time it took for the seamstresses in Atlas to send a replacement; after all, it was not every day that a Dust-infused combat skirt was damaged beyond simple repairs. Her train of thought was broken when Valeria stepped out of the portal again, carrying a single vial of cherry-red potion and handed it to Ruby.

"Thanks, Archmage!" she replied cheerfully, downing the whole vial in one gulp and making a face at the taste. "Eww. Gross,"

"Many of the more potent potions do not taste particularly pleasant," chuckled Valeria, "Your broken arm should mend fully in ten minutes at most, though it should be healed sufficiently for gentle movements immediately. I would suggest that you rest for a while before engaging in any activities,"

Turning away from her and looking up at the gateway above, she continued wistfully, "You have done well, young Miss Ruby. I had high expectations for you and your team, and yet...you have exceeded them. Learning an acceptable level of magickal arts, from having not even the slightest inkling of the existence of magicka, within a such a short time is nothing short of impressive. I rarely find cause to praise others of extraordinary competence above and beyond that which is expected of them; so take pride when I say this. Well done,"

The redhead giggled at the unexpected praise, her cheeks brightening with pride. It had been the first time that the Archmage had given anyone praise in any of her classes; and it was directed at all of them. All of her own team.

Despite her better judgement, Ruby did the first thing that she thought of. She stood up and walked towards the Khajiit, throwing her arms around her waist in a hug. Valeria, stunned by the young leader's reaction, looked over her shoulder in surprise.

A faint smile tugged at her lips. It had been centuries since anyone had even remotely shown any amount of affection towards her. Perhaps teaching the magickal arts was beneficial to her, after all. And perhaps her frozen undead heart had been thawed for the first time in centuries.

"Thank you, miss," Ruby said. The Khajiit turned around and kneeled down a little, returning the young girl's hug and giving her a lick on the cheek, eliciting a ticklish giggle from Ruby.

Perhaps she could spare some more time to teach on Remnant. After all, the Elder Council did most of the work of governing an empire anyway...

* * *

A/N:

Valeria, the kids are rubbing off on you... *gets zapped by a lightning bolt* Ouch. Stop that!

Comments and questions are, as always, welcome. I will try to address them by the next chapter, if they have not formed part of that chapter's content.


	9. 09 - My Gun is Bigger

The creation of the interplanar gate had created quite an uproar among all the kingdoms of Remnant. While Vale's ruling council had been easy enough to convince of the Nirnian Empire's peaceful intentions due to Ozpin's reassurances, it was not quite so for the other kingdoms. Vacuo, Mistral and Atlas all eyed the gate with great caution and a healthy dose of fear. After informing Ozpin that she was returning at the start of next term to continue teaching, the man appeared to be pleased; though he was noticeably less so when she informed him that until the planet was unified, the Mages' Guild could not establish a presence on Remnant, and thus she could not accept any additional students beyond those that she already had.

Not that she was inclined to anyway, given how the other kingdoms in the world treated her.

Initially, they requested that she explain her intentions of opening such a portal to a completely different plane of existence. But with the arrival of her personal dreadnought, a three-mile long battleship with a ventral magickal cannon running its entire length and bristling with an arsenal of hundreds of smaller guns and missile pods, the other kingdoms were now demanding that she explain her actions. Atlas, in particular, had been extremely vocal about the presence of her military forces (a single ship plus its crew) above Vale. Granted, it _was_ a very large ship, dwarfing the whole of Beacon Academy; but the Atlesian general on the other side of the scroll call seemed to have neglected to consider a couple of things.

One was that the ship was currently moored to the gate itself, guarding the portal from any curious aircraft that ventured too close; she never had any intention of invading.

The second was that Valean airspace was most certainly not under the jurisdiction of Atlas.

"For the last time, Mr. Ironwood, I will reiterate myself," Valeria said calmly, though the way her fingers were white-knuckled around a goblet of water spoke otherwise about her true emotions, "The Nirnian Empire sees no reason to attack any nation on this planet. Your fears of an invasion of Atlas by my own forces are wholly unfounded,"

"That makes no sense at all! A large vessel such as that can only be for-"

"Farewell, Mr. Ironwood. Have a nice day,"

She terminated the scroll call a bit too forcefully, cracking the surface of the scroll a little. "J'Bari?" she called out.

The Khajiit in question poked her head out of the walk-in wardrobe that was part of Beacon Academy's teacher suites. "This one lives to serve, Your Majesty,"

"You may have the rest of the day off. After all, I am certain that you wish to see your friends one more time before they leave for their holidays," she said, "I shall finish tidying my personal effects on my own,"

"You are too kind, Your Majesty," the younger Khajiit purred, bowing deeply.

"Think nothing of it. Though, I will ask you to relay a message to Team RWBY,"

"This one complies. What message must this one repeat?"

"That I have made up my mind. Their advancements in the magickal arts have earned my respect. If they so desire, I will permit them to visit the Arcane University for all of their two weeks, as guests of mine. They shall be treated as royal guests for the duration of their stay, and will be afforded all the comforts that such honours entail,"

"Khajiit shall do so. Though if this one may be so bold, Your Majesty, this is one must admit that she finds it rather unusual that Your Majesty finds such great interest in them,"

"As true as that statement might be, I would suggest that you purge those thoughts from your mind. My concerns are none of yours,"

"This one is deeply sorry if this one has caused any offence,"

Valeria shook her head. "There is nothing to apologise about. But if you wish to see your friends before they depart, I would suggest that you go to their room soon. I do, however, have another request. Please inform Miss Schnee that I would like her to introduce myself to her father. After all, this substance called Dust may well have many uses for our alchemists and engineers back on Nirn, and I require a steady supply of it. Now go, and return to me once you have a reply from Miss Schnee,"

* * *

Within an hour, Valeria had her belongings packed neatly into the same metal crates that they had brought with them on the initial expedition into Remnant. Now, walking back towards the waiting Nirnian corvettes on the ritual site, she looked back at Beacon Academy. Despite the fact that she had only taught there for a very brief period of time, she felt a profound sense of...loss. Just thinking that she would be back in the labyrinthine machinery of government in just a few hours filled her with a little bit more regret that she could not spend more time on Remnant.

"Milady. The Elder Council is awaiting your return," a messenger said to her, stepping out of the nearest corvette and kneeling. Valeria motioned for her atronachs to move her belongings onto the small vessel, which the lumbering ice creatures did without a single word.

"Tell the Elder Council that they may wait for a little longer. They are, I assume, doing well enough without myself to lead them so far," she replied disinterestedly.

"They state that it is urgent, milady," the messenger added. He dared look up slightly, only to flinch and bow his head deeply when his eyes met her blazing orange ones.

"If it is so urgent, then they can speak to me directly from a scrying orb. Unless you would also inform me that not a single one of them has remembered how to use one? You may return to them and inform them that I have said so,"

"Yes, milady. I am sorry to have offended you, milady,"

"Just...go," growled Valeria, thoroughly revolted by the messenger's incessant grovelling. It was times like these that she wished that messengers weren't so low-ranked in the Legion. At least the higher ranked officers could treat themselves with a little more self-respect.

"J'Bari is here, Your Majesty," she heard a familiar voice purr. Looking over her shoulder, she nearly jumped when she noticed that Team RWBY was following behind her loyal apprentice.

With her elite inquisitors' swords at their throats as their invisibility spells winked out of existence.

"Lower your weapons! I have invited them, and they mean no harm," Valeria said, and the inquisitors immediately lowered their weapons without another word, "I apologise if my inquisitors have been a little...overprotective,"

"A little bit? These goons didn't even say a thing before they put their swords up!" Yang replied indignantly, irritating a few of the closest inquisitors who put their hands back on their swords' grips.

"J'Bari is sorry. This one should have mentioned that Yang, Ruby, Weiss and Blake were all friends of J'Bari, and were personally invited by Her Majesty,"

"Indeed, my apprentice. You should have done so prior to taking your friends along with you. But I certainly do hope that you do not take offence-"

A blur of red and a flurry of rose petals later, and she found herself gripped about the waist by a hyperactive redhead in a tight hug. "OhmygoodnessIhopethatdoesn'thappenagain-"

"A little less haste has never hurt anyone, Miss Rose. Inquisitors, return to the transport. I wish to speak with these people in private," she spoke, running a furred hand through Ruby's hair. Noticing that J'Bari still hadn't moved, "Yes, that means you as well, J'Bari,"

"Wait, I thought she was your apprentice? And isn't she part of this Imperial Legion or something?" Weiss murmured, raising an eyebrow.

"An astute observation, Miss Schnee. Yes, she is my apprentice. Yes, she _was_ part of the Imperial Legion; a fully trained battlemage. She _is_ , however, part of the Inquisitorial Order. One of my personal retinue of elite bodyguards,"

Weiss stared at J'Bari's retreating back. She had suspicions about the Khajiit's story. It didn't make much sense that someone so well versed in Destruction magic – and magic in general – could be completely incompetent with Conjuration. Nor did it make much sense about why an apprentice would have such substantial knowledge about all the schools of magic; literally any question that any of Team RWBY asked, she could answer without a problem.

"Why? Why hide her identity?"

"Because it would be easier for her to obtain a honest assessment of the people of the academy, both staff and student alike, if she were to pose as a student. Emphasising her identity as an apprentice of mine was the most expedient way to do so; and fortunately, it was one that she could easily embrace without forgetting. She is a very excitable soul, after all; a trait that she seems to share with you all,"

"I'll say," Yang grinned, remembering the times when they had fun teasing both Blake and J'Bari with laser pointers and balls of catnip-infused yarn attached to a fishing line on Crescent Rose's barrel. She had to stock up on more catnip yarn sometime. Maybe Auntie Sheogorath could help her get some.

"Now, as pleasant as this is, I will have to ask you to remove your hands from around my waist, young Miss Rose, before my inquisitors have an aneurysm from your...excessive closeness," Valeria chuckled, slowly prising away Ruby's arm away from her. "Thank you. I hope that J'Bari has informed you of the exact reason why I have requested your presence here?"

"Uh...is this about the invitation for more study at...the Arcane University? Well, I mean, if Rubes is okay with it, then I'm going too, I guess?"

Weiss smiled widely and nodded, the scheming gears in her head turning. This offer was better than anything that she had ever expected in her wildest dreams. An entire university dedicated to the research and teaching of magickal arts! Who knew just how much power she could gain in there? She would be the most unstoppable huntress ever! Especially with a brute that she could improve with potions, a long-range sniper that has an enchanted rifle, and a sneaky assassin that was loyal only to herself. Not to mention the army of conjured creatures that she could bring forth!

"Did anyone else see storm clouds behind Weiss?" Ruby asked, perplexed; the question snapped Weiss out of her thoughts, causing her to blush when she noticed the odd looks that everyone was giving her.

"I will assume that is a...very positive approval from Miss Schnee. Miss Belladonna, what say you? Will you join the rest of your team for two weeks in my realm?"

The cat faunus nodded. It was one thing seeing faunus being mistreated in Remnant, but to have a cat- no, a _Khajiit –_ as the supreme leader of an empire capable of building such enormous vessels as the one casting a shadow over Beacon Academy? It was intriguing for her. Especially since her other bodyguards were humans. She had to see whether this tolerance was only on the surface, or if it truly penetrated down into the rest of its society.

"Very well. Then I shall make the arrangements tonight to have some quarters prepared in the White-Gold Tower for your use. _Stendarr's Mercy_ will arrive tomorrow to relieve my personal dreadnought in its watch over the transplanar gate, and that is when we shall leave for Nirn. For now, however; Miss Schnee, have you informed your father that I seek a source of Dust?"

"Well, I – of course I have. The Schnee Dust Company would be honoured to negotiate with a potential new business partner," Weiss replied, snapping into her Schnee Dust Company Heiress mode.

Valeria smirked in amusement. "I have dealt with enough merchants in my lifetime to know when I am being flattered for a better bargaining position, Miss Schnee. You would have to do far better to acquire significant concessions from myself,"

"Drat. Well, it was worth a try," she muttered quietly under her breath, earning a short laugh from Valeria.

"Indeed. Now, let us board our transport so we can begin our journey towards Atlas. I do have more than one person to meet there, after all. As for your belongings, we will stop at Beacon again before leaving for Nirn, so you may retrieve your belongings then,"

* * *

"This is unheard of. A ship that large would require an incredible amount of energy just to stay in the air!" exclaimed Dr. Oobleck, zooming from window to window in Ozpin's office as he watched Valeria's personal dreadnought bob up and down gently in the air, tethered to the interplanar gate by ethereal chains.

Ozpin took a sip from his coffee. "That it is. But I'm more worried about what James might do if Valeria doesn't answer his scroll calls in a way that he finds agreeable. After all, you know just how many times he's called me ever since that gate was created,"

"Yes, yes. An unfortunate side-effect of his personality. Wish he could see it for what it is; a marvel of engineering, and not just an oversized weapon! I would truly love to learn how that ship functions,"

"Hm. Perhaps. Are you aware that Team RWBY has been invited to visit the Arcane University on Nirn? Perhaps they could obtain more information about how it works,"

The green-haired doctor's eyes nearly bugged out. "Truly? These young huntresses-in-training had been _invited_ , and we haven't? As her colleagues?"

"It appears so," Ozpin mumbled, taking another sip of his coffee. His eyes followed the progress of a pair of shuttles ascending into one of the gigantic ship's hangars; as soon as they were inside, the ethereal moorings of the dreadnought vanished, and its engines began to spin up, emitting a bluish-white jet of superheated matter. Slowly, the vessel turned around, and eventually shot off into the distance, faster than any of them ever anticipated for something so large.

In the direction of Atlas.

"Hm. It appears that James would have to curb his temper if he wishes to avoid a diplomatic incident,"

* * *

But it seemed that it was not only Ironwood that needed to rein in his temper that day. At Atlas' airbase, an irate Jacques stood tapping one foot while repeatedly checking the time on his scroll.

An unexpected message from Weiss on his scroll said that there was a prospective client for truly monumental amounts of Dust, and that he needed to be present for the deal. A prospective client that was purportedly the empress of some empire that he had never heard of. The first message from his daughter arrived just over an hour ago, and yet her next message said that she would be at Atlas within an hour. An hour, which was at least seven hours faster than even the fastest SDC Bullheads could travel.

A part of him wondered if this was simply an elaborate prank that his daughter had crafted. But he had raised his daughter to be more reverent than those plebeians beneath his family's notice, and he remembered how difficult it was for him to even extract a single word from his daughter without threatening to cut off her weekly allowances. If she had sent a message of her own volition, it would most definitely _not_ be a casual trick. And then, there was the possibility of the White Fang having somehow captured her in Vale, and forcing her to send the message to gain his attention.

Whatever the case, he had notified his friend in the Atlesian Military about the message. James Ironwood, as punctual as ever, immediately notified him that he should come to the Atlesian Military Airbase as soon as he could.

And the reason for that immediately became apparent as a massive ship – dwarfing the Atlesian Cruisers, which looked like mere toys compared to it – sped towards Atlas from the direction of Vale at incredible speeds. Early warning alarms wailed, and dozens of Atlesian servicemen and women rushed out to man the defenses on the airbase walls.

The ship slowed down, however, and maintained a position above the airbase, giving them a good look at it. The ship was almost draconic in shape, having a pair of enormous wings studded with various guns and what looked like missile pods; its body was sleek, though no less well armed than its wings, and a quadruplet of large engines on its rear, each the size of an Atlesian cruiser, answered his questions about exactly how that ship moved so quickly. The entirety of the exterior was plated in gleaming black metal, though there was an unfamiliar emblem emblazoned on the underside of each wing.

A silver dragon, contained inside a silver diamond.

"What do you mean, my _daughter_ is on that ship?" an irate Jacques Schnee growled under his breath to James Ironwood, who motioned for him to calm down, "I had heard foolish reports of some kind of airborne gate opening up above Beacon Academy, and that a large ship has popped out of it, belonging to no kingdom of importance. Are you telling me that whoever is on that ship has taken my daughter hostage?"

"We don't know that, Jacques. What we do know is that your youngest daughter is on that ship, if what Ozpin said is true,"

"It is true, father," Winter added, "I have run the transmission through several algorithms designed to detect irregularities in the transmission, and they have all returned negative results. Professor Ozpin's transmission was genuine,"

"Fine. If that transmission _was_ genuine, then what is that ship doing here?"

At that moment, every loudspeaker in the base began to emit static. Even scrolls were apparently not immune; all three of their scrolls began to emit a high-pitched shrieking noise, which momentarily subsided.

"Sir. I do believe that...whoever is on the ship is hailing us. On all frequencies, and even on personal communications systems," Winter murmured, taking out her scroll and looking at the message from an unidentified sender.

"I—that's impossible! The Atlesian Military screens these communications devices for any and all security flaws," stuttered Ironwood in disbelief, taking out his own scroll, "Including unauthorised messages from outside sources! But...it appears that you're right. I have a message here,"

"Well? What does it say?"

"It's asking for permission to send a shuttle down into the airbase," Ironwood replied, looking straight at Jacques, "Specifically, for you, and...myself. That Empress of theirs wishes to speak to us both,"

The colour drained from Jacques' already pale face. Speaking to both of them? The gears in his head began to turn. If Weiss' message was genuine, and this Empress of theirs was the customer that Weiss had been speaking of, then it made sense that _he_ would be asked to meet her, as the prospective supplier of all that Dust that was asked for. But that did not explain why General Ironwood was being asked to come along as well.

But if the message from his daughter was forced? Perhaps they were only trying to get leverage on the Atlesian government. He was the head of the largest, most profitable company in all of Atlas, and General Ironwood was the head of the Atlesian armed forces. With a ship that large, however, it made little sense to even attempt to acquire leverage when they could simply level the city and take everything that they wished to take. What could they possibly gain out of that?

"James. Do we have any way of replying to them?" Jacques whispered, "I will agree to board their vessel, on the terms that we are permitted to bring a contingent of our own personal security forces,"

All three of their scrolls pinged again. A single message was written there: 'Granted. One bodyguard'.

"What the hell? Are they listening in on us?" James shouted in disbelief, checking over his shoulder for any spies. His scroll's firewalls had reported no intrusions or other security breaches, and that was the only other way that they could have heard what was said.

Ping. 'We are watching. We are listening. We are waiting'.

"Specialist Schnee, do you think this is a trap?" Ironwood asked his aide, who shook her head.

"No, I don't think so," Winter replied with certainty, flicking her fingers over her own scroll.

"What makes you believe that, Specialist Schnee?"

"Because my sister – or rather, one of her...teammates...has just sent me a picture from onboard that ship, using my sister's scroll. She is...doing well. Very well, considering the circumstances,"

* * *

"Another drink of tea, Miss Schnee?"

"That would be most gracious of you, Your Majesty," she replied stiffly, attempting to maintain a facade of pure, unadulterated refinement while Valeria refilled her silver goblet. Ruby, Yang and Blake, on the other hand, were sorely resisting the temptation to laugh out loud at the heiress' almost constipated expression.

"I would say that you are forcing your image of refinement a little too much, Miss Schnee," Valeria commented airily, causing Weiss' shoulders to stiffen even more. "Though I must admit, many young women born into aristocratic circles do find difficulty in behaving...ah, 'prim and proper' in the presence of their superiors, while in the company of their laughing peers. And wearing a most...interesting choice of headwear, no less,"

A fresh round of guffaws came from the three other girls, while Weiss shot them a dirty look. Ra'shamarra, who had created a portal into the Empress' private suite during the flight, flashed her a toothy grin and a double thumbs-up from beside Ruby. It was her idea to play a round of liar's dice, with the winner deciding a (non-harmful) punishment for the loser. Which, in Weiss' case, was all but guaranteed for her, as she was decidedly incapable of maintaining a straight face while telling a lie.

Her punishment was to wear a formal dress, as she had worn before in New Sheoth. But as that was too easy, her punishment was to wear a headdress consisting of a stack of cookies and four glasses of milk, balanced precariously on top of her head, while being treated to a proper tea party by Valeria. Fortunately for her, it seemed that the Daedric Princess had some measure of mercy, as the headdress had some kind of shielding ward to prevent any crumbs from falling into her hair.

"Alas, while this is definitely entertaining for the rest of us, I believe that we should have arrived in Atlas by now. Which means, mother, that you need to return to your realm,"

"Bah, spoilsport! I was just starting to have fun! Now where am I going to have fun," whined Ra'shamarra, her ears drooping exaggeratedly. "Perhaps I need to give you a cabbage. So you can kick it around. Wait, why would anyone kick cabbages around? They're to be led around! On a leash made of yarn, of course. Why, perhaps I should show you all later-"

"Mother," warned Valeria.

"Fine, fine. I shall see you all later, then. But I am seeing you now, which therefore makes no sense. But later anyway!"

Ra'shamarra turned on the spot and vanished; the cookie-and-milk headdress vanished from Weiss' head, and the heiress sighed in relief.

"Now then, as this is a formal meeting between the Kingdom of Atlas and the Nirnian Empire, I do expect that you will be dressed appropriately. While your combat equipment is undoubtedly effective on the field, you will require something more...modest. J'Bari?"

"Yes, milady?" the younger Khajiit purred, dispelling her invisibility field and stepping out of the shadows, causing Team RWBY to jump in surprise.

"Fetch some fine dresses for these young ladies, if you would please. And inform a handmaiden or two that I require help to put on my own,"

* * *

When the shuttle that Jacques, Ironwood and Winter were on touched down inside the giant ship's hangar, none of them knew what to expect. The pilot of the transport – a reptilian faunus-like creature – spoke not a single word, even when asked.

Eventually, the ramp on the back of the transport began to lower, revealing a large hangar bay perhaps a hundred metres long and twice as wide. Rows and rows of soldiers were assembled in black-and-silver armour on either side of a central aisle with a red carpet running down the middle of it. The frontmost soldiers held on to a large tower shield almost as large as they were tall, with longswords strapped to their thighs; the ones behind them had long rifles and what looked crossbows with magazines on their undersides.

"NINTH LEGION! ATTENTION!" barked out an officer at the end of the red carpet. All the soldiers present immediately fell into line with a single synchronised stamp of their feet. "PRESENT ARMS!"

Ironwood and Winter could recognise a very well drilled army when they saw one. And this was likely on par with the Atlesian military, if not better. Every soldier of the Ninth Legion saluted as one, looking directly in front of them without the least bit of hesitation.

"ORDER ARMS! AT EASE!"

The soldiers lowered their weapons and clasped them behind their backs. Those with a shield placed them to their left before doing so. Mustering as much dignity as they could, the three representatives of Atlas walked down the aisle, at the end of which sat a woman on a red-and-gold throne, holding a golden staff in one hand, and flanked by several others. One of whom was immediately visible to both Jacques and Winter, who immediately recognised the long, flowing white hair that was characteristic of the Schnee family line.

When Jacques approached the throne, however, bile began to build up in his throat. The woman on the throne was a damned _cat_. A faunus whore! On a throne! And to think that his daughter seemed completely at ease at her side! But years of business dealings had drilled complete neutrality into his expression, despite whatever he might have thought otherwise. Surely, however, a faunus could never be the leader of an empire. Perhaps this was only a proxy, or a mere representative of the empire. Even if the purple-and-gold fur-trimmed robes did look rather costly and of fine make, the cat was likely just a puppet of a very rich, very influential nobleman or somebody similar.

"I was under the impression that I was supposed to be meeting with the empress of an empire, and not a...faunus," Jacques murmured. If the cat on the throne had heard anything, she made no sign that she had at all, though he did see his youngest daughter's eye twitch a little. "I would ask that you bring me to her for business proceedings. My time, after all, is precious, and I have already cancelled several meetings to make time for this,"

"Father," Winter whispered under her breath, noticing how several of the soldiers flanking the enthroned cat faunus had slowly moved their hands closer to their weapons – and that her sister was frantically shaking her head and holding up her hands, "I...believe that we should perhaps hear what they have to say first,"

"Indeed, you should," the enthroned cat spoke coldly. Winter looked at her in confusion. She had barely moved her lips to speak, and yet she heard? Faunus hearing was incredible. "Inquisitor J'Bari, if you please,"

"This one complies gladly, Your Majesty," growled the grey tabby on the cat's right side. Turning to face the three from Atlas, she cleared her throat and spoke in a loud, clear voice, "You are in the presence of Valeria Septim, the first of her name; High Queen of Skyrim, Empress and sovereign of the Nirnian Empire; Archmage of the Arcane University of Tamriel,"

"You mean to tell me that a _faunus_ , a mere _faunus_ , is this empress that my daughter wrote to me about?" Jacques exclaimed in disbelief. "A filthy faunus isn't even capable of something so simple as digging out Dust from my mines without requiring expensive purification equipment! They are uncultured, unintelligent brutes only fit for the simplest of tasks! This is outrageous! I demand that you bring me the true empress!"

Winter was desperately trying to catch her father's attention now to prevent her father from saying anything more. "Father-"

But Valeria was quicker than either of them. Slowly, she rose to her feet. " **Ninth Legion. You are dismissed for now; return to your duties** ," she boomed out over Jacques Schnee's ranting, her voice thundering through the hall and shaking the entire hangar. The soldiers all saluted and departed from the nearest exits; both Ironwood and Winter did not miss the dirty looks that many of them threw their way. "Now, I believe that a civil discussion cannot happen when one side is incapable of rational thought-"

She waved her hand, and to Winter's relief – and Weiss' amusement - her father's ranting was immediately silenced after a green flash of light washed over him. No matter how much he moved his lips, not a single sound came. "-And so it is better to remove that which does not contribute to a discussion. There. That is much better, is it not?"

"What did you do to him?" Ironwood said incredulously, watching Jacques try his hardest to speak, to no avail.

"A simple silencing spell. It will wear off momentarily," Valeria said airily. Then, without warning, she rounded on Ironwood. Every step that she took left a large slick of frost and sharp icy daggers on the carpet. "And you must be General James Ironwood. Professor Ozpin spoke highly of you, though I must admit that my initial impressions of you have not been pleasant at all. Since you are disinclined to believe my written statements that my Empire has no interest in conquering, razing, or otherwise engaging in hostile actions against Atlas or any other kingdom in Remnant, I believe that a face-to-face meeting would be far more effective at getting my point across,"

"And what point is that?"

"That your backwater city-state of a nation has little strategic or economic value to the Empire, and that hostilities would not result in a gain for either of our nations. That, and it is always good to remind others of the first basic law of successful diplomatic negotiations,"

Valeria leaned forward, allowing her overly-large canines to protrude from her widely-grinning mouth. "Always begin your negotiations from a position of strength, James Ironwood. And never make demands until you have ascertained the true disposition and strength of your target. I will say this once, and it will be the last time I will say it. The Empire has no intentions at this point in time to engage in anything more than simply guarding the airspace around the Interplanar Portal over Vale; which, might I remind you, is not under Atlesian jurisdiction,"

"As for you, Jacques Schnee; if my request for a reliable Dust supplier is too onerous for one such as you to fulfil, then I would assume that many of the lesser Dust suppliers in Remnant would be far happier to accept my offer. After all, if my request for a fifty thousand tonnes of refined Dust a year is too onerous for your company to handle, then perhaps it would be best if I were to approach others who are more...inclined to assist,"

All colour drained from Jacques Schnee's face. If his competitors acquired a contract of that magnitude, the Schnee Dust Company would be driven into the ground in just a few years. That amount of Dust was more than two thirds of the SDC's annual production!

Grinning like a cat that had caught a particularly plump fish, Valeria rubbed her hands and then said, "It appears that I have finally obtained your attention. Excellent. Now, then, let us begin negotiations..."

And so began the most painful business discussions that Jacques Schnee had ever undertaken in the many years of his business career...

* * *

A/N:

Khajiit is not a faunus! Khajiit is innocent of this crime!

...And Khajiit has coin, if human has wares.

ultima-owner: I have heard that Sheogorath is particularly fond of yarn, cabbages, and burning dogs.

Reaver17: Ruby's hair colour is...confusing. On promotional material (ads and such), it comes up as red with black undertones. On the anime, it comes up as black with red highlights. Ultimately, it's a pain in the ass to describe correctly either way, so I'm sticking to the one that best describes the colour given the colour palette of her character.

Akshka: Ironwood is being Ironwoody. 'Nuff said :P Diplomacy isn't his strong suit at all.

Mangahero18: Coming up soon.

playwars5: Horde of angry gnarls: Better than whips and carrots!

doughxDude87: Even if they did, I don't think Ruby could count to 3 without squeeing all over its design. 1...2...5!


	10. 10 - The Otherworld

Weiss' day couldn't have had a better start. Her father had managed to obtain a contract from Valeria for supplying fifty thousand tons of various kinds of Dust annually; a sum that was worth millions of lien, paid entirely in cold, hard silver and gold. But what made her day – and made her respect the Archmage that much more – was that the Khajiit forced her father to surrender five percent of the proceeds to her, as commission for 'brokering the deal'. Not to a trust fund, not to a withdrawal-limited account. It was hers, and hers alone, to spend as she wished. And that amounted to a truly, truly massive amount of spending money.

When asked about _why_ she did so, however, Valeria had replied in a cryptic whisper to her, "One does not simply learn to manage an empire without first managing a lesser fiefdom first,"

With the business deal secured, her father also could no longer prevent her from visiting the Arcane University for two weeks. Rather, her father _wanted_ her to go in and learn as much as she could. As she understood it, he had been rather skeptical of the existence of the magickal arts until Valeria conjured several high-ranking Dremora to crush every summoned creature that Jacques could bring out with his Schnee semblance. Suitably impressed, the Schnee patriarch no longer had any objections to his daughter learning some new techniques from Nirn.

Now, on the bridge of the _Wrath of Talos_ , however, she found her excellent morning quickly deteriorating, thanks to the antics of their team leader. Who, it seemed, was completely incapable of restraining her excitement at...well, _everything_.

"Ooh, can I see that? What's this do?!"

The admiral on the deck of the ship seemed to share Weiss' frustrations, as his eyes twitched whenever Ruby approached a console or an ensign on the ship that was manning a console. "Your Majesty, could I ask you to...ensure that your guest do not interfere with the operation of your vessel?"

"Miss Rose, please calm yourself," Valeria sighed. When Ruby ignored her, she found herself whisked back to Valeria's side in a puff of purple smoke, held down by glowing green glyphs. "I must remind you that this is my vessel, and it would behoove you to behave appropriately. Now, I believe that our good admiral here mentioned that we will be crossing the portal in a minute or two. If you would please assume a seat, it would be much appreciated,"

Everyone except Ruby sat down on the plush bench that lined one side of the warship's command deck. "Uh, Archmage Septim? I can't sit down like this,"

"Seeing as you were very interested in the workings of the ship, I believe that what you call a front-row seat might dissuade you from being too inquisitive, young Miss Rose," she murmured, grinning evilly at the restrained girl, "Admiral. Are the preparations complete?"

"Yes, Your Majesty," replied the stern-looking man at the front of the command deck. Turning to face the rest of the driving crew on the deck below, he shouted, "All hands, prepare for jump! Activate inertial dampeners, seal all bulkheads! Engineering, maximum power to shielding; five percent engine thrust forward!"

A powerful blue shield enveloped the whole ship as it started to move its bulk forward towards the floating gate. Ever so slowly, it rotated so that the bow was facing directly into the gate's centre; a torrent of blue-green sparks shot from the shields as the bow moved through the gate. The floor shook violently, causing Team RWBY to grab on to the nearest object to steady themselves (except Ruby, who dearly hoped that the green energy shackles on her ankles did not break). The bridge's glass windows showed nothing but brilliant white fire as the ship continued to push laboriously through the portal.

For the briefest of moments, a sudden sensation of weightlessness enveloped all of them, before gravity kicked back in.

"Engineering, report status of shielding and engines," the admiral calmly spoke, "Navigation, confirm flight path to Anvil void-port and notify all air traffic to divert and maintain a half-mile exclusion zone,"

The white fire on the glass had vanished, leaving behind only traces of green-white embers. Ruby fell to the floor with a loud thump when her restraints likewise vanished. Weiss and Yang jumped to their feet to help Ruby back up, while Blake was simply transfixed by the sight in front of her.

It was a completely new world. Lush green fields and rolling hills stretched on for as far as the eye could see, rising up from oceans of deepest turquoise. Here and there, she could see a hovercraft levitating above the clean white beaches, heavily laden with silvery piles of what could only be fish. And in the distance, nestled in an estuary, was a large city of pure white stone; a tower of black stone rose high into the sky from its centre, surrounded by vast numbers of aircraft, of various shapes and sizes. The entire sky was lit in a brilliant orange-pink, courtesy of the sun setting in the horizon.

But what stuck out the most were the _moons_ behind the black tower. Neither of which were shattered. They were whole, and very, _very_ large, easily dominating the twilight sky.

"Welcome to Nirn, Team RWBY; capital world of the Nirnian Empire," Valeria purred.

* * *

The _Wrath of Talos_ , it seemed, was incapable of docking at the spaceport at the coastal town that Valeria called Anvil. They had to disembark on smaller shuttles into the port itself, and from there to the rather unimaginatively named Imperial City. The city itself was a strange mix of modern and ancient; the roads were still covered in dark grey cobble, lit by magickal balls of light. Buildings of sleek glass and steel stretched high into the sky, while rustic restaurants and homely coffee shops of stone and wood lay nestled in their bases.

Now, inside an armoured self-propelled vehicle resembling an ancient horse-drawn carriage with darkly tinted windows, the group was moving through one of the main avenues of the Imperial City. Weiss and Blake were recording the sights on their scrolls (or rather, as best they could given the dark windows), while Ruby and Yang were craning their necks to have a better look at the numerous unfamiliar sights.

"What's that tower?" Ruby asked, gawking at the towering white structure in the centre of the city. Despite the modern skyscrapers all around it, the white tower in the centre rose higher than the rest, seemingly almost touching the moons.

"That, Miss Rose, would be my home. And the home of the Imperial Senate, when senate sessions are convened. The White-Gold Tower,"

"That's...yours?" gasped Weiss. As the carriage drew closer and closer to the building, she could finally see just how large it was. Beacon Academy's main tower might as well have been a little watchtower compared to the skyscraper that was the White-Gold Tower.

Nodding, Valeria added, "It is currently mine. However, if you must be precise, it belongs to the crown of the Nirnian Empire. That is, the ruling Empress or Emperor. I suppose that would make it essentially mine, given how it has been mine for the last...fifteen hundred years,"

"Wow. Fifteen hundred years, in a tower like that? Must be lonely," Yang said, whispering lowly.

"More than you can imagine, Miss Xiao Long. More than you can ever imagine," murmured Valeria, running a finger over a giant red ruby on her necklace. If Yang wasn't imagining things, the gemstone seemed to glow warmly when she touched it.

* * *

The following morning, Team RWBY found themselves woken by a crack of very loud thunder – coming from somewhere within their room. In a panic, Blake and Yang tumbled off their shared bed with a yelp, while Ruby sat bolt upright, her eyes darting left and right.

The source of said lightning, it seemed, was a widely-grinning J'Bari, who was dressed in some lavish black-and-purple fur-trimmed robes. Unlike the previous times that they had seen her, she held a long, thin staff in her hands; one that was topped with a bright blue crystal, glowing brightly with energy. There was lightning arcing between her fingers, which periodically gave a very loud snap.

"Ah, good. May warm sands be ever under your feet, friends. This one hopes that you have all had a nice warm bed to rest the night in," she purred.

"J'Bari, what the hell?" groaned Yang, pulling a pillow over her head as she clambered back under the sheets. Peeking out from under it at one of the windows high on their room's far wall, she noticed that there were only the first rays of pink light peeking through. "It doesn't even look like the sun's up yet!"

"For once, I have to agree with Yang," Weiss added grumpily, snuggling further into something soft and warm. And smelling faintly of strawberries.

Soft and warm? And smelling of strawberries?

It was only when she opened her eyes that she realised that she was staring right into a pair of rose-covered pink-tinged pyjama pants. And when she looked up, her eyes met curious silver ones.

"AHHH!" she shrieked, causing Ruby to tumble over in fright; the red-haired scythe wielder stammered apologies profusely in an effort to calm the hysterical heiress, whose face was burning red as brightly as Ruby's usual cloak.

When J'Bari broke into loud, guffawing laughter, they realised that something was not quite right. J'Bari was most certainly _not_ the type for verbal jests, let alone practical jokes. Blake was the first to react, fishing out Gambol Shroud from under her pillow and unsheathing it, training the gun-scythe on the Khajiit.

"Oh, how rude!" she exclaimed, vanishing into a puff of purple smoke and revealing Ra'shamarra in her usual patchwork robes. "Do you young people still no longer appreciate practical jokes? Or are jokes no longer practiced where you live?"

Weiss was livid. She snarled at the elder Khajiit, "Practical joke? I'm not seeing what's so funny!"

"You know, easing off the salt would do you a world of good, my precious snowflake. Or make some good of the world. I don't see you complaining about _her_ when you were asleep!" Ra'shamarra giggled, thumbing at Ruby, "Nor the little rose, when you were sleeping in her lap. So adorable, the two of you,"

"What—how did you...?"

"My dear, when you were an Archmage, you learn quite a few spells that will help with sneaking. Of course, it did help too that Khajiit are as sneaky as burglars. Sneaky cat burglars! A dash of muffling here, a touch of weightlessness there, and a sleeping enchantment on both your minds—and there we have it! A pair of unwitting lovebirds, fit for any bystander to see!"

"Urgh, I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," Weiss groaned, burying her face in her hands, "What are you doing in our room anyway, Ra'shamarra?"

"Well then, isn't _that_ a great question! Would be better with more appreciation for humour, I think. But if you must know, my daughter actually asked me a favour today. She said that she wished to walk you four around the Arcane University grounds, but she is busy today. Busy with boring, _boring,_ matters of state! Running a nation can be oh-so-dreary, don't you think? And seeing as J'Bari is guarding her all of today, your young Khajiit friend cannot be the one guiding you around. Which means, that you have the privilege of being taken for a tour by nobody other than—who's that? ME!"

Blake and Yang shared a look.

"Dust help us all,"

* * *

Despite their misgivings, Ra'shamarra was a reasonably good guide to the Arcane University. When she was not assuming the guise of the Madgod, of course. Perhaps it was due to the fact that she was once the Archmage, a long time before her own daughter took the position; but she knew exactly where everything was on the rather large campus.

Though, that being said, that didn't stop her from gleefully examining the new additions to the University. New additions that would be new to _her_ memory, but not that of the young Khajiit whose visage she adopted.

Like the giant golden orrery that was on display in the main foyer of the Arcane University. She stared at it in wonder, amazed that apparently someone had gone and fixed it while she was absent. Only to draw strange looks from the elderly female Bosmer that was tending to the elaborate clockwork device, who said that it had been fixed for the better part of fourteen hundred years.

"Hold! I sense an illusory field on you!" the elf commanded, clapping her wrinkled hands. Several storm atronachs burst to life at each of the tall double doors leading into the foyer; energy barriers sprung up all along the walls, preventing anyone from coming in or out, "State your business, and dispel the field. Or I will have to notify the authorities that we have an impersonator attempting to break into the facilities of the Arcane University, with four young accomplices at that!"

Team RWBY shrunk back behind Ra'shamarra. "But we haven't done anything wrong!" Ruby cried out, warily watching the storm atronachs as they stomped ever closer.

"No, you haven't. But access to the university grounds is restricted to guests of the Archmage and senior associates of the Mages' Guild only,"

With a short laugh, however, Ra'shamarra's disguise vanished, revealing her true face. At least the Madgod had enough sense to wear more reserved mages' robes under the disguise; a simple forest green one, trimmed with dappled grey fur. The Bosmer's jaw dropped as she saw the Khajiit; she clapped her hands over her mouth, her eyes wide in amazement.

"Oh, come on, Bothiel. Has it really been that long? Wait, of course it has. You likely don't even remember your old Archmage!"

"A-Archmage Ra'shamarra? Is that really you?"

"As surely as sweetrolls are missing in all of Tamriel! Why, I should make it rain sweetrolls over the Imperial City, and thus I could prove myself wrong. Yes, of _course_ it is me, you starry-eyed dolt. Still pining after dear old Raminus and the rest of the old guard, are you?"

"I thought...we all thought you had gone missing," she choked out. Waving her hand, she dispelled the barriers and the storm atronachs. A number of battlemages immediately rushed in, thunderbolts and fireballs in hand, ready to investigate the disturbance, "A false alarm, gentlemen. We have no need for your services at this moment,"

"As you command, Master-Wizard," they responded, bowing before they left.

As soon as the last of them departed, Bothiel hissed out, "Where were you for the last fifteen hundred years? Martin Septim died banishing Mehrunes Dagon from the Imperial City, and you had a daughter out of wedlock with him! The least you could've done for her is to raise her properly, not just leave her to poor Raminus to look after! The man could hardly tie the laces of his smallclothes together, let alone look after a little illegitimate child!"

Ra'shamarra shrugged and gestured in the direction of the White-Gold Tower. "Nonsense! My daughter is doing just fine. Just look at her, prancing about in her fancy robes, leading the largest empire that the world has ever known. Doesn't look like she's had a bad childhood, hm?"

Bothiel snorted. "You have no idea, my friend. Between the last of the Mythic Dawn assassins sent to kill her, and the numerous usurpers looking to kill the last Septim heiress, I'm surprised that we've been able to keep her alive for so long, between all of the senior university staff. It's truly a wonderful thing that she's inherited your quick wits and vast reserves of magicka. Otherwise, I wouldn't know what to do if she didn't know how to throw white-hot fireballs by the age of ten and got herself lost in the markets!"

The old Khajiit puffed up with pride. "Of course she knew how to do those simple tricks! She's my child, after all,"

"And I sometimes wish that she didn't inherit your pride, too. That child tried to bind Molag Bal to her will at the age of twenty-one, after we just given her the rank of Master-Wizard. That didn't end well, and poor Raminus spent _weeks_ trying to find her again. Only to find-"

A flash of green erupted from Ra'shamarra's hands and silenced the Bosmer. "Stop. Stop there, Bothiel. We've got ears in the room that don't need to hear about what grumpy, wrinkly, lustful old Molag did to her," she said darkly. Clapping her hands, the silencing spell was immediately undone. "Especially when one of them is so young that she still drinks milk every day,"

"Hey! Milk is good for growing up!" Ruby protested, much to the amusement of everyone else.

"Yes, yes, of course it is. Now, Bothiel, I'm not supposed to be on Imperial City grounds. I suppose that you know the reason why, considering that you are aware of the date which I vanished from Mundus?"

The elf hummed as she thought aloud. "Fourth of Sun's Dusk, fourth year of the Fourth Era. How could I forget? That was the last night that...oh..."

Her eyes widened in realisation. "The last night that Sheogorath's gateway existed. Leaving behind only a naked madman where it was, screaming about how there was a new Madgod, and how the Greymarch had been ended by a 'kitty cat with nine lives riding a bolt of lightning', who apparently took the Madgod's throne afterwards. That was you? _You_ are the new Madgod?"

Another puff of purple smoke, and Ra'shamarra was back in her patchwork robes, grinning broadly. Bothiel's eyes rolled back in her skull, and she fell to the floor, stunned.

"Well, girls, it looks like it's time for me to see what my daughter has taught you," Ra'shamarra said crisply, rubbing her hands together, "Let's see you get Bothiel back up on her feet, shall we? I think that Bothiel looks _very_ fatigued. Ruby, Weiss?"

After a bit of fumbling with her spellwork, Ruby managed to resuscitate the collapsed Bosmer, after which Blake offered a vial of stamina restorative. Taking the vial of green potion with a nod of thanks, Bothiel downed it with one gulp, smiling when she realised it didn't taste as downright disgusting as most potions tended to be.

"Thank you, young ladies. I should be just...fine. This news...this is just a bit of a shock, that is all," Bothiel murmured, standing up with Ruby's help. Fuming, she glared at Ra'shamarra, "After all, it's not every day that an Archmage goes missing, and then reappears several hundred years later. Everyone thought you were dead, Ra'shamarra,"

"Good to know that I'm missed! Maybe I should take the position back from my daughter, hm?" cackled Ra'shamarra, "Just kidding! I think she does just fine without me running the show. Who am I kidding? Myself, of course. Who wants to be running the show anyway? I like seeing the shows that my manic clowns put up in New Sheoth!"

"I suppose that would be entertaining for the less...orderly among us, yes. But really, I want to know why you've come back. You've never been one to do something without a reason,"

"Well, isn't THAT a question! As is everything else, I suppose. You see, my daughter asked me to do her a favour. She wanted me to take these fine young ladies on a tour of the University grounds. Care to assist me?"

And thus began the day that Bothiel learned that one does not simply stop the chaos from following the Madgod around. Even in the Arcane University, and even if said Madgod was an ex-Archmage on a mission to tour the university grounds with some guests in tow.

* * *

A/N

Well, it's been a while since I've managed to get something written. It seems that Sheogorath has failed to grace me with his inspiring touch for some time, and I'm glad that it appears to be back...in some capacity.

playwars: Jacques always struck me as odd when the name came out as canon for Weiss' dad. Considering that the name is distinctly German (with wrong accents), and all his kids start with W for a name, I would have thought that his name would also start with a W. But, it appears to be canon, so I'll stick with it.

Another Guest: Yeah, Jacques is usually all about the cash. But considering how the White Fang has been plaguing his company for so long, and how he views Faunus as something beneath his notice, it would literally flip his world upside down when he realises that a not-Faunus-but-close-to-one has probably more power and wealth than he could ever imagine.

As usual, thanks for reading, and hope you enjoyed it. Feel free to leave comments, questions etc. if you feel so inclined.


	11. 11 - Gone Elsweyr

A week since their arrival in the Imperial City – and their admission into the respective schools of magic in the Arcane University, Team RWBY found themselves neck-deep in their studies. It was fortunate that the upper floors of the White-Gold Tower had a private study for the use of the Empress or her guests, conveniently placed just below the guest suites. There was thankfully even a copy or two of almost every single book that was in use at the University inside the room, in various shelves lining the brightly-lit circular room.

For 'light reading', as Valeria put it, when she came across the team using her books late at night. That was, if one considered reading through a hundred-page manual 'light'.

"You know, I'm really jealous," Blake murmured, walking past another bookshelf and scanning the spines for a copy of an alchemy textbook, "It's like she has her own private library inside her house. All these books...there's literally thousands of them in here,"

"Well, considering that she literally owns entire planets, that shouldn't be too much of a surprise," Weiss replied, not even looking up from the conjuration book she was reading, "I mean, the Schnee Manor has one too. Doesn't every house have one?"

Weiss raised an eyebrow when all of the other teammates glared back at her. "What? Why are you all looking at me like that?"

"You know, for someone that's incredibly smart, Weiss," Yang groaned, "You can be so un- _Weiss_ about how things work,"

"Hey!" protested the heiress, as everyone else groaned at the terrible, terrible pun.

"Not everyone is as rich as you are, you know. Some of us are just happy to even have a roof over our heads and food on the table," explained Blake calmly. "This? A personal library is _heaven_. I could spend weeks in here, just reading. Hey, have you got a copy of 'Fundamentals of Alchemy' on that table, by any chance?"

Weiss glanced at the table in front of her. There was a giant, swaying stack of books on top of it. One that only required a very small disturbance to topple, and one that was probably tall enough to bury everyone nearby in it if it fell.

And a disturbance was indeed provided, by one hyperactive red-cloaked girl, who smiled as she found the book in question. "Here it is!" she said happily, snatching out a thick green book from the base of the stack and holding it up triumphantly, unaware of the horrified looks on her teammates' faces. Down came the tower of books upon them all with an almighty crash, burying Weiss, Ruby and Yang under an immense pile of leatherbound tomes.

"You dolt!" shouted Weiss, shifting several books off herself and standing back up. The work that she had done so far was strewn on the ground; creased and crumpled and squashed. "Did you even realise just how many hours that took to write? I was up all _night_ writing it, and now it's all ruined,"

"No it's not," Yang chuckled nervously, fishing out a torn page with Weiss' flawless writing on it, "See? I can still read it,"

Right before it fell apart in her hands.

"You...ugh! I can't believe you two!" snarled Weiss, snatching the two pieces up from the ground, "I'm supposed to have this done by this morning! Now I'm going to have to start all over again!"

"This one heard a crash and shouting. Is there something wrong?" J'Bari called out, poking her head through the doorway. Seeing the books on the floor, Weiss' livid face, and Ruby and Yang's apologetic faces, she put two and two together and sighed. "Khajiit thinks she knows what happens. This one asks Ruby and Yang to be more careful with Her Majesty's belongings,"

She walked in and waved a hand, and the books slowly levitated up from the floor and onto an empty table in shorter piles. "Khajiit is not sure why Weiss is not pleased," J'Bari continued, checking if she had missed any other books around the room, "J'Bari knows that Weiss has submitted all the necessary work on Fredas. One paper for Conjuration, and one paper for Restoration. So this one wonders why Weiss is working on a Sundas?"

"Yeah. Why are you working on a weekend, Weiss? It's time for us to have a break!" Ruby chimed in, crossing her arms and pouting, "We could play some video games! You've got a scroll, right? How about-"

"This one is offended," J'Bari declared, glaring at both Weiss and Ruby before pointing at the stained glass window high on the wall. A bright beam of light passed through it, casting various dappled colours onto the white marble floor of the room, "This is a wonderfully pleasant day of First Seed, and Ruby is suggesting that we spend it indoors? This one thinks that is no way to live,"

"You know, Rubes, she's got a point. We've kinda been stuck inside studying all the time for this whole week, and I could really go for a walk right about now. So, kittycat; I'm game. What's on your mind? Another walk down to the Market District?"

"No, this one has something more planned today. This one wonders if Team RWBY likes to swim?"

"Swimming? But I thought that there were those...you know...slaughterfish in the lake near the Imperial City,"

"This one has not said _where_ she was going. This one wishes to travel to Elsweyr,"

Now it was Team RWBY's turn to look at the Khajiit strangely. "Elsewhere? Of course you would be travelling elsewhere if you aren't planning to swim here, right?" Weiss said uncertainly. The Khajiit, however, shook her head in amusement.

"Elsweyr is elsewhere other than the Imperial City, of course. But Elsweyr is a place. This one wishes to travel there for a day, to curl up and nap on the warm sands of Senchal's beaches while eating roasted moonfish. If Team RWBY wishes to come with J'Bari, this one can oblige,"

Weiss looked at J'Bari, and then back at the stacks of books and papers on the tables. If she left now, then she wouldn't get her work completed – and that meant that she didn't learn everything that she could.

"On second thought, this one thinks that this one will make that an order," J'Bari said sternly, noticing Weiss' glance, "You are all coming with J'Bari for some rest and recuperation. Do not think that you have avoided Her Majesty's attention, Weiss; she knows that you have been working without enough rest for the entire week. Even Her Majesty is taking a rest, as she has gone to visit an old friend in Skyrim today,"

"But...my work..." she whined. All that knowledge, just there to record and to bring back to Remnant, and she was being dragged away for this?

"This one wishes to inform you that Her Majesty would have no qualms compelling you to drink an energy-boosting potion if she finds you too exhausted. One that tastes of crushed fireflies, month-old decaying cheese and putrefying mushrooms,"

Weiss blanched at the not-so-subtle threat. Some of Blake's own potions were already fairly disgusting to taste. "Okay. Okay," she squeaked in a small voice, "You have a fair point,"

* * *

"You know, don't you guys have...portals to go everywhere or something?" Yang asked curiously, wondering why the White-Gold Tower apparently had an underground garage built into its base.

"It requires an enormous amount of energy to maintain a permanent long-distance portal," answered J'Bari. The Khajiit was walking past rows and rows of almost identical black, sleek, two-doored hovercars in storage pods with energy barriers over them, humming as she walked past each one and shook her head. "Now, where could the quartermaster have moved J'Bari's car..."

Eventually, they came to a slightly larger pod with a rather different vehicle inside. It was an open-topped hovercar; still two-doored, though with what almost looked like a giant rocket engine on its rear. The exterior was a pearlescent violet, with stripes of silver running down its sides and on the back.

"This is yours?" Yang gasped, running up to it and stroking the luxurious black leather seats. J'Bari grinned and nodded.

"It is. Well, not exactly. This one was awarded a crime lord's personal vehicle after this one assaulted his base, as part of her right to the spoils,"

"Alone?"

"No. This one had help from her superiors, but they already had vehicles of their own. J'Bari was only an initiate into the Inquisitorial Order at the time, and the others thought that it would make a fine welcoming gift,"

"That's one expensive gift," Yang said, whistling lowly, "How fast does it go?"

J'Bari cracked a mischievous grin. "Explanations are not necessary. You will see for yourselves,"

* * *

"Okay. It's fast. Very, _very_ fast," Yang cheerfully said, casually flipping her hair as she stepped out of her car, "But I'd say Bumblebee is still more fun to drive,"

"More _fun?_ You call that...driving...fun?" Weiss mouthed, looking very green as she clambered out of the back seat with Ruby steadying the heiress, "She nearly hit _everything_ on the way here!"

A wave of nausea hit her, and soon Ruby whisked the white-haired girl away to a nearby bush, where she emptied her stomach. Several times, in fact.

"J'Bari, remind me to bring some motion sickness medicine next time I come with you," wheezed Weiss after she was done, wiping her lips with a tissue.

"I've been on Yang's bike before, and she drives crazy; but this is...really different," Ruby added happily, "I've never been in a flying car before. That was awesome! But it might be too much for poor Weissy,"

"Yes, it _was_ too much. Could you drive...a little slower, next time? Where are we, anyway?" murmured Weiss, taking her first good look at where they were.

They were in a tranquil, secluded cove, with a seemingly endless cerulean sea stretching out for as far as the eye could see. Pristine white sand covered the beach, dotted by tall palm trees and elaborate carved stone pillars from ages past. Chalk-white cliffs rose out of either side of the cove, forming a deep gorge that they were inside; viridian crystals glimmered on exposed rock faces, casting brilliant green rays wherever the sun shone upon them.

"Oh. Look at all the fish," Blake commented, eyeing the plump fish in the water hungrily. They were swimming lazily in the shallows, just soaking in the warmth.

"Yes. This little cove is full of fat, tasty fish," J'Bari added, licking her lips and rubbing her hands together, "This one was about to go and fish for lunch, but it looks like you are also willing to fish. If you wish, you could come with J'Bari,"

"No need to ask twice," replied Blake. She removed her boots before realising that they had forgotten something very important for a beach. "Uh...wait, J'Bari, I think we all forgot our swimwear,"

"This one had suspected as much. But this one has a solution. Why not ask Her Majesty's mother for some? After all, this one has seen that Her Majesty's mother was kind enough to give you all some rather beautiful gowns, and some swimwear would not be too much to ask for,"

"Yeah! That's a good idea, J'Bari! Yaaaang, you still have that ring, right?"

"Wait, you aren't wearing yours?" Yang questioned her sister. A quick look at her left hand showed that Ra'shamarra's ring was not on any of her fingers.

Ruby fidgeted with her fingers. "Well...I might have left mine in the trunk back in our room. It's too pretty to wear every day, you know?"

"Yeah, okay. Well, just rub it, isn't it? That simple?"

When her sister nodded, Yang took a deep breath and rubbed the silver ring earnestly. For a brief moment, nothing happened; but then a purple portal immediately burst open in front of them, revealing a jovial Ra'shamarra and her most bored seneschal.

"Oooh! Will you look at that? A beach! A genuine beach! Not like the ones I made in my realm," the elder Khajiit laughed. Yang coughed and drew her attention; on seeing Ruby waving to her, Ra'shamarra rushed forward and wrapped the short girl in a one-armed hug. "And my favourite little cubs! Still bringing light into my dour daughter's life, are you all?"

"Yeah...about that..."

"No, wait, don't answer. I think I know the answer. Of course you are! After all, you're here. On Nirn. Which means that you're still with her! Oooh, and you've got her little apprentice too. Hello, young one. Where's your mistress today?"

"This one greets you, Sheogorath. Her Majesty is currently visiting Paarthurnax in Skyrim,"

"Oh ho! The ancient dragon is still dispensing his wisdom, is he? Well then, I suppose it would do her some good to talk to a friend. But tell me; why are you still dressed? This is one fine beach, you know. Run along; strip, run as naked as the day you were born! Relax and lounge in the sun!"

"Uh..." Ruby started, blushing a beet red at what Ra'shamarra had just said. Sometimes, the crazy old cat was a little _too_ crazy. "T-that's kind of why we rubbed the ring,"

"What? You need old Ra'shamarra's help to do that? To take your _clothes_ off?"

"What? No, no, no! No, nothing like that!" sputtered out the reaper, burying her face in her hands, "Dust, no, eww. That's just gross,"

"What Ruby means to say," Blake interjected, speaking as calmly as she could and hoping to spare Ruby from any further embarrassment, "Is that we were invited to visit this beach by J'Bari, but we forgot to pack any swimwear. We thought that maybe you could help us bring some back from...New Sheoth?"

Ra'shamarra blinked twice. "That's all? That's ALL that you are asking for?" she said incredulously, before her lips cracked in a manic grin, "Of COURSE I can do that!"

"Just...make it tasteful. Please?" asked Weiss, dearly hoping that the Madgod would listen to her request.

Which, thankfully for her, Ra'shamarra obliged. She snapped her fingers, summoning a Golden Saint to her side. "You! Bring them a set of swimwear! Tasteful ones, mind you. Just ask the handmaidens for their sizes. They should know,"

If the Daedric woman was annoyed by the petty request that had been made of her, she didn't show it. "By your orders, milady," she spoke in a flat tone, disappearing through the portal and returning moments later with five boxes of clothing, "As you have requested,"

"Excellent. Well, off you go then! Back to New Sheoth with you," Ra'shamarra laughed, taking the little boxes and banishing the Daedric woman back to her realm, "Let's see, one for you, one for you, one for you...and one for each of the two of you. Wonderful!"

"Thanks, Auntie Sheo! Now...uh, J'Bari, got a place we could change?"

J'Bari opened her mouth to answer, but then immediately closed it. She didn't have this problem, normally, as she would normally visit this secluded beach on her own. Changing into swimwear never was an issue then, after all. A snap of fingers broke her thoughts, however, as a cubicle of magically-bound sand simply rose from the ground.

"So simple, but so elegant! Doesn't it drive you mad, hm? Well then, you know that Auntie Ra'shamarra doesn't do things for free. Because free things don't exist! I want a fish. A big fish. A tasty fish! Of course, a well-grilled fish, seasoned to absolute per-fec-tion! Can you do that, my little cubs?"

Blake and J'Bari shared a knowing look and licked their lips. "Yes. Yes, indeed," they both answered in unison.

* * *

An hour later, after a swim in the cool ocean...

"Blake, you know we aren't going to be able to finish all of that, right?" Weiss huffed exasperatedly. Both of the more feline members of their group had gone out of their way to catch as many fish as they possibly could. Even now, there were at least a dozen large, plump grilled fish sitting on a conjured platter, with another two suspended over an ethereal roasting spit on one side of the beach. Ra'shamarra had ordered a barrel full of fresh water delivered from her palace, along with a set of silver goblets.

"Can't finish all of it? Sure you can! You didn't say how long you had to finish it. We have all day, you know!" Ra'shamarra cackled, "But I'm getting hungry. And a hungry kitty with a lot of fat, tasty fish in front of her is a grumpy kitty. What are you all waiting for? Let's eat!"

Blake and J'Bari needed very little encouragement to do so. Both of them grabbed a fish apiece and devoured them ravenously, while Ra'shamarra grabbed one in each hand and picked them clean of flesh in seconds. Yang and Ruby likewise shrugged and divided up a fish between the two of them with a conjured knife, savouring the lightly browned, well-seasoned fish.

"Ugh, table manners?" Weiss groaned. Watching them eat fish with their fingers was affronting to the heiress. So unrefined!

She then noticed Ruby shovelling chunks of fish into her mouth using a translucent, glowing fork. "I didn't think that you would be the one to use proper cutlery to do eat, Ruby; not when your sister seems happy enough to just use her hands. Where'd you get one?"

"Mmmmpf-hmm," Ruby mumbled indistinctly through a mouthful of fish, waving her free hand and gesturing wildly. Realising that Weiss couldn't understand her, she swallowed the fish and washed it down with a goblet of water. "Sorry, Weiss! I meant, I conjured one. There was a manual on basic conjured tableware in the library back in Archmage Septim's house, and it was easy enough to learn, so...yeah! Forks, knives, plates for everyone!"

"Huh. I suppose that could come in handy on the field," mused the heiress, coming closer to inspect the fork. It wasn't exactly what she could call refined; it was very plain-looking, and was oddly phasing in and out of reality, as though Ruby didn't have enough energy to properly bind it to the physical world. "I...have not learned that conjuration yet. Do you have another one?"

Ruby lifted her free hand and shook her head when only feeble purple sparks came from her fingers. "Sorry, Weiss, I couldn't make any more," she said apologetically, "I'm still not as good as you are with Conjuration. But...I think I know how to fix this!"

Before Weiss could ask what her solution was, she found herself with a piece of fish on a fork in front of her mouth.

With the fork held by Ruby.

Her mind short-circuited for a brief moment. Her partner was trying to _feed_ her? What was she getting at?

"Weiss, are you alright? You're blushing," Ruby asked innocently, "Come on, Weissy! Open wide~"

"I can feed myself, thank you very much!" blurted out Weiss, embarrassed that Ruby was even attempting to do this.

"But you're not going to eat if you don't have proper cutlery, and I can't conjure any more. Come on, Weiss. It's not that bad, is it?"

Just when she thought things couldn't get any worse, she heard a voice that she least wished to hear at that moment. "How wonderful! It looks like you have a secret admirer. Or maybe not so secret now, if we can ALL see it, hm?" Ra'shamarra giggled loudly, "Come, now. It's rather rude to refuse a gift! Just enjoy yourself. She's being very nice, after all. And that's nicer than _me_ being nice! I'm rather jealous, actually. Should get Haskill here to do that for me more often, hm?"

"I must decline, milady. My job is to keep your realm in as much order as is humanly possible, not to provide you with entertainment," deadpanned the seneschal, rolling his eyes.

"Bah, spoilsport! I suppose I'll just have to get one of the chambermaids to do something like this for me,"

Weiss looked once at Ra'shamarra's encouraging grin, and then to Yang. The blonde was barely restraining her laughter at the scene, while Blake and J'Bari were simply too distracted by the remaining fish to even care. Closing her eyes, the heiress mentally told herself that maybe it wouldn't be too bad to be fed by her partner. When she opened them again, however, her eyes met silver ones – and a girl doing her best to imitate a puppy.

"Sigh. Fine," Weiss grumbled, slowly eating the chunk of fish off Ruby's fork.

 _Okay. Maybe it's not so bad to be fed by another person,_ she thought to herself, watching Ruby picking out another choice piece of fish from the platter. _Just for today, I'll allow the dolt to spoil me. Just for today._

* * *

A/N

Blake + tuna + ? = PROFIT!

Blake + (many fish) + ? = PROFIT x 9001

A shortish chapter for this one, as a bit of relief from the usual grind of classes and learning. A day trip to a beach has never hurt anyone, has it? :D

Mangahero18: Yeah, it's actually how the daughters of coldharbor are born. There's actually a lorebook somewhere in game that describes the creation of the first vampire, and it doesn't beat around the bush about the topic.


	12. 12 - Results and Rewards

With fond memories of their beach outing still fresh in their minds, Team RWBY tackled the rest of the week's lessons earnestly. Destruction, Conjuration, Restoration – or any others – not a single one posed too great a challenge for the group. After all, when one didn't understand, it was likely that at least one of the others would know the solution. Theoretical solutions were likely known by Weiss, who threw herself at books after dinner every night, while Ruby and Blake seemed to have a more instinctive grasp as to what they were doing. Yang, however, could sometimes come up with absurdly simple solutions to complex problems; often without realising that she had the solutions in the first place.

Their time at the Arcane University was coming to a close, however. Two weeks was hardly enough time to cover all the intricacies of magicka, even with half a term's worth of study backing it up. When they came into the now-familiar foyer of the Arcane University on the last Friday of the second week, they met a most unfamiliar – and improbable – sight.

There was Valeria waiting inside, in some rather thick, fur-trimmed purple-and-gold robes. Standing rather closely beside a statuesquely beautiful woman, whose fair face was framed by thick, voluminous raven hair that reached down to her mid-back. She wore jet-black robes, accented by intricate silver embroidery all down the front; a long cloak fell from her shoulders, held by a silver brooch in the shape of an imperial dragon emblem over her right breast. Her eyes were the same blazing gold as Valeria's own, which caused Weiss to wonder whether those glowing eyes were simply a mark of a powerful mage or something else.

She was scratching behind Valeria's ears, eliciting loud purrs from the normally stoic Archmage. Neither of them showed any sign of noticing Team RWBY; Valeria was doing her best to rub her forehead against the woman's hand and cheeks, blinking slowly as if in an euphoric trance.

"You know, it's rude to stare," the woman said, in a smooth voice that almost seemed to lure them in. Valeria snapped out of her trance, shaking herself like a cat that had been rudely disturbed from its favourite activity. "Any reason why you are?"

"Hm. Perhaps that was not the wisest of ideas, my dear. I rather liked that," grumbled Valeria, "Perhaps I should have stayed in the archmage's personal chambers, so that I could enjoy that some more before classes begin. But at the very least, these are my trusted students and not some strangers. And on time too, Miss Xiao Long. Perhaps you should make more of an effort to be punctual in the future, as this is genuinely a surprise,"

"Oh, but I try to not leave anyone _Yang_ ing for too long," she replied with a grin on her face, "That was a good one, right guys?"

Groans came from the rest of the team, while both Valeria and the woman beside her were completely nonplussed. "Geez, you guys all need to get a better sense of humour!"

"Is this what...passes for humour among the youth of this age?" asked the woman uncertainly, crossing her arms, "It would appear that what they consider amusing does not align with what we consider amusing,"

"No, I must say that Miss Xiao Long's sense of humour is...peculiar. It takes a very unique mindset to understand, much less appreciate," commented Valeria, earning an indignant "OH COME ON!" from Yang, and an approving nod from Weiss.

"I would dearly hope that is the case. Gods, I would think that mortals could not possibly regress that badly over a thousand years,"

Stunned silence followed that comment. Ruby and Weiss both gawked at the strange pale woman. Blake started to shrink behind Yang in a similar fashion to when they had first encountered Valeria, prompting Yang to be a bit more serious. The cat faunus' senses were often more attuned than the rest of Team RWBY's, and Yang had gotten used to the fact that if Blake seemed perturbed, something was usually not as it seemed.

"A...thousand years?" the heiress mouthed, stunned. The woman did not appear to be much older than any of them were. She had to be at most in her mid-twenties, given her youthful appearance. One of these days, she would have to find out exactly _how_ these people managed to live for so long without any apparent aging.

"Seeing as these girls are your apprentices, perhaps you should introduce me to them,"

Valeria nodded, smiling. "Very well. Miss Ruby Rose, Miss Weiss Schnee, Miss Yang Xiao Long, Miss Blake Belladonna," she spoke, addressing each of them one by one, "This is Archmage Serana Volkihar of the College of Winterhold, Lady of Castle Volkihar. And as of yesterday, my betrothed,"

More silence.

"Wait," Yang chuckled weakly, "Let me get this straight. You're engaged to...this hot, _hot_ woman? Damn,"

"That would be correct, Miss Xiao Long. Although 'hot' is likely the least appropriate of words that could be used to describe her, as her touch is likely as cold as ice,"

"And yours is likely the same. But it is a good thing that both of us are truly resistant to cold, isn't it?" Serana added, smiling wryly.

"Wow. If I didn't think Blake was nearly as good looking, I'd be jealous," mumbled Yang, flinching when said cat faunus slapped the back of her head. "Ow! I'm kidding, Blakey, geez. What's gotten into you?"

"Well, let's see," Blake said sarcastically, "Aside from you obviously trying to flirt with someone while your girlfriend is right beside you, with your teacher's fiancee, no less? Oh, absolutely _nothing._ Everything's just fine,"

Serana shared a look with Valeria. "Tell me that this isn't normal for your students, please. I'm not even trying to attract them, and Miss Xiao Long looks like she's going to have a lot of apologising to do later tonight,"

"Oh, she will definitely need to do much more than that, miss,"

Sensing that perhaps the group needed something more agreeable to talk about, Ruby spoke up. "So uh, Archmage Valeria? Congratulations! How long have you...uh, known...uh...Miss...Volkihar?"

"Only for something close to thirteen centuries, after she...rescued me from a stone prison deep underground," Serana answered for her fiancee, "But this isn't really the best place to stand and talk about personal details. Valeria, didn't you say that you needed me here to assess their magickal abilities?"

"Wait, assessments?" Weiss spoke, shaking herself out of her stunned stupor.

If there was one way to wake Weiss up, it was the threat of impending academic doom. Or, on the flipside, free additional marks; the more, the better. Now paying her fullest attention, she demanded, "I didn't hear anything about assessments!? This isn't fair!"

* * *

The 'assessments', as it turned out, was more akin to a huntsman's Aura activation rather than a written exam, much to Weiss' relief. The first assessment had each one of them flare out their magicka as best they could, while Valeria and Serana both noted down how much energy they could project. All inside a magickally-insulated room beneath the Praxographical Centre, both in case of a magickal backlash and for privacy.

"So, uh...did we pass?" Weiss asked uncertainly, not sure if the 'assessments' were actually assessable items in Beacon or not.

"Passing or failing has nothing to do with survival, Miss Schnee. I simply intended to check how far you have all developed as mages since starting your studies," replied Valeria, looking up from her datapad, "And given your results? Yes, yes, I would say you have...exceeded all expectations. My expectations were high, Miss Schnee, and yet you – and the rest of your team – have exceeded them. Well done, Apprentices – and Evoker Schnee. You have all started on the first step on the path to becoming true battlemages,"

"Evoker?"

"Oh, yes, Evoker indeed. While the other students in Beacon were content to simply learn only what I have assigned to them, you sought out to learn everything you could. You have far outstripped your peers in magickal abilities; that much is apparent from the readings that I have obtained thus far. That in itself is admirable, Miss Schnee, considering that your teammates and classmates are very quick learners – though I daresay that your alchemical work could use a little help, if the explosion in your dormitory in Beacon was any indication of your prowess. Or lack thereof,"

"Hey! That wasn't me!" she cried out indignantly, "Blake decided to add Fire Dust to a Flame Stalk!"

"Hm. In that case, then...Apprentice Belladonna, you must be more careful when selecting your reagents. Dust is highly reactive to begin with, and a Flame Stalk is hardly any less reactive. What made you think that an explosion was not imminent, had you mixed the two together? Fire Dust and a Flame Stalk, no less, when both of them contain copious quantities of fire essence?"

"I...uh...That was a mistake," Blake said sheepishly, having no excuses for the blast that almost demolished the room.

Valeria simply chuckled and shook her head. "Every alchemist makes mistakes at the start of their career, but do be more careful in the future. I recall the first time that I attempted to make an invisibility potion. Only the head of the drinker vanished, rather than the drinker's entire body. Suffice to say that there were many calls for a wayward necromancer to be caught that day when I tested it on a stray dog, as was the custom at the time for testing new potions,"

A mischievous grin lit up Yang's face. She could think of so many ways to prank people with that sort of potion! "That sounds totally awesome!" said the blonde excitedly, "Can you make some more of that?"

"As much as I would like to say yes, Apprentice Xiao Long, the answer is no. It is nearly impossible to replicate the effects of a failed potion. Even less so when the equipment available to us these days have all been enchanted to prevent these mishaps from happening too frequently. In any case, before you may call yourself true mages, every mage possesses a staff, as a conduit and battery for magicka. That is why I have taken you out of your classes for today, so that you may all begin to craft your own staff,"

Ruby's hand immediately shot up, less than thrilled at the prospect of having to use something else other than Crescent Rose as a weapon. "Miss, why can't we do that for our own weapons? Like, why a staff?"

Valeria opened her mouth as if to give an answer, but then immediately shut it, stroking her chin and humming thought. Why a staff? She had never really thought about it, given that most battlemages never had any reason to complain about what they had been raised to think as normal. After all, every mage for the last one and a half millennia used or carried a staff of some sort, herself included. Melee combat was viewed as uncouth and unrefined by most of them, after all. But given how most of the students in Beacon Academy had some form of shapeshifting weapon that was simultaneously a ranged and a melee weapon, she was now less inclined to believe that physical and magickal weapons were mutually exclusive.

"A very good question, Apprentice Rose," murmured Valeria, "If the purpose of a staff is to store and discharge magickal energies, then all that would be required is a storage crystal, in the form of a grand soul gem – and a conduit of some magickally conductive material, typically living wood, gold or silver. But I do not see any reason why the _shape_ of the conduit should matter, as simply holding any part of the conduit should allow its wielder to channel magicka through it,"

"So...I don't have to put away Crescent Rose?" Ruby said hopefully.

"Truth be told, I am not quite certain. What you are suggesting – the combination of physical and magickal in a single weapon – is completely unorthodox. If you were to suggest such a thing to the Imperial Legion's munitions board, they would likely request healers to assess whether or not you have gone mad," Valeria answered, "But after what I have seen in Beacon Academy's classes, it appears that stranger things are considered normal. After all, combinations of ranged and melee weaponry of all shapes and kinds seem completely natural to you all. If you are willing to try and craft such a thing, Apprentice Rose, I am not averse to the idea,"

"Yay! Awesome! My sweetheart is going to get even more deadly!" cheered the little hooded reaper, "So, when do we get started? Right now?"

"As much as I would like to say yes, Apprentice Rose, the Arcane University does not have the facilities to manufacture physical weapons. I do believe, however, my dreadnought has the right equipment in its armoury,"

Before she could say anything more, the excitable girl zoomed out of the foyer, leaving behind a trail of rose petals in her wake. Valeria shook her head and chuckled in amusement. "Well, I suppose that answers my question as to whether or not she will come. Miss Xiao Long, if you could fetch your sister and meet myself and Serana back in the White-Gold Tower by lunchtime, I would be very grateful indeed,"

* * *

"You may look, but don't touch," Valeria sighed, knowing that the little speed demon would ignore her instructions and proceed to touch every bit of equipment in the armoury anyway. The moment that Ruby looked as though she was about to run off, Valeria flicked her hand lazily and latched a couple of conjured shackles onto the girl's ankles. "Apprentice Rose. Please do calm yourself down. Ah, Quartermaster gro-Shurgak. I had been looking for you,"

A tall, dark-green Orsimer swaggered towards them; dressed impeccably in a spotless naval officer's uniform, complete with medals and an ostentatious three-pointed felt hat with an outrageously large multicoloured feather on top. He bowed deeply towards Valeria and Serana, while giving only an almost imperceptible nod towards Team RWBY.

"Ah, fair lady! Good show. Let us conversate on...whatever it is that you must. Speaketh you on,"

While Valeria seemed completely unfazed by what the Orsimer had just said, Team RWBY was completely bamboozled by what they had just heard. Nevertheless, either the Orsimer was incredibly dull and failed to notice the strange looks that the girls were giving her, or he simply didn't care about them. The man simply stood at attention, waiting for the archmage to continue speaking.

"I seek an available foundryworker and forgemaster, and a supply of ebony ingots. My apprentices need weapons made,"

"A fine recess. I shall see if there are any amiable workers to persist you. Wait you for a minute,"

When the quartermaster disappeared behind a number of tall metal crates, Yang looked at Ruby and asked her in a whisper, "Did you get anything that he just said...?"

"Nope. I'm confused. Like, _really_ confused,"

"It is rude to talk about someone behind their backs, Apprentice Rose, Apprentice Xiao Long," chided Valeria, shaking her head, "In any case, here he is again,"

There were two more people following him. One was a short, stocky dark-skinned man that seemed to be built entirely of muscle; the other was a burly Khajiit that possessed cybernetic legs and arms visible behind a baggy brown leather smock. Both bowed respectfully the moment they saw Valeria, though less deep than that given by gro-Shurgak.

"I see you have returned, quartermaster. Are these two fellows who I have asked for?"

The Orsimer nodded. "Exuberantly. Here are my confederates, Masters at-Tura and Ma'jhad. Is there anything else that Your Majesty seeks to require from the armoury?"

"That would be all, Quartermaster gro-Shurgak. Thank you; you may return to your duties now,"

"Anon us most soon again, for sooth,"

"Your Majesty? This one is ready to serve," the Khajiit spoke, his tail flicking from side to side, "What is it that you require?"

"I believe that my apprentices require a weapon to be made. A fusion between a magickal staff and a weapon, if you will. I am not privy to all the details, and thus it may be best if they were to inform you of their needs directly,"

"Ah. If that is the case, then this one is willing to listen to the young ones," Ma'jhad said, smiling widely, "This one is rather bored of making simple swords, hammers and rifles. There is simply no challenge in crafting mere razor-sharp blades. What do the young cubs have to show me that warrants the best forgemaster this side of the galaxy, hm?"

Taking that as a cue to show off Crescent Rose, Ruby lifted it from its resting spot on her belt. Ma'jhad's eyes lit up with glee as he watched the weapon unfurl into its scythe configuration.

"A battle scythe? This one is intrigued," Ma'jhad laughed. He hummed and observed the weapon closely, "Hmm. This one sees much. This one sees that the weapon is of a fair age, with its share of battle scars, but very well maintained. Its blade is sharp, but the weapon's balance appears to be too far forward. Ma'jhad wonders; what would happen if the young lady in front of him were to swing this into soft mud? Would she be able to retrieve it, or would she sink with it?"

"Hey! I can lift Crescent Rose just fine, thank you very much," she cried out, puffing up indignantly as she picked it up and manipulated it with ease. A slip of her hand, however, caused the sniper-scythe to slide forward a bit too much and slam into the ground; and she found herself being vaulted over the weapon by its sheer mass.

"This one believes his point has been vindicated," the Khajiit deadpanned, offering a hand to lift Ruby back to her feet after the girl landed with a loud thump. "This one also noticed that there is the trigger system of a rifle on the scythe's handle, and a muzzle brake on top of its blade. One seemingly designed for anti-vehicle rounds. A fascinating double use of a weapon. If Ma'jhad may guess, Ma'jhad would also guess that the blade can act as a monopod for when accurate fire is desired,"

Ruby's jaw dropped. This man knew _exactly_ what he was looking at. The very first person that could tell what Crescent Rose was at a first glance; what it was, what it did, what else it was – and even _how_ it could be used. Another bonafide weapons nut, right in front of her!

"You know, if Ruby is shocked by someone else when she's trying to show off her baby, that person's _damn good_ ," Yang said, grinning, "Okay. I'm game. Let's get some magicka batteries in Ember Celica. Let's see if I can make these into flamethrower gauntlets!"

* * *

A few hours later, Team RWBY finally received a thumbs-up from Ma'jhad. Their weapons had been completely reforged in some black, ultrahard alloy that the Nirnians called 'ebony', infused with significant quantities of powdered soul gems.

While Ruby was sad that she would have to redo the fire enchantments that she had put on the original Crescent Rose, she was ecstatic at having another weapons enthusiast to speak to. Especially one that had much, _much_ more experience in crafting weapons from scratch. Ma'jhad, while curious as to why a mage would even need a rifle – and a war scythe combined into one, no less – did not ask any questions. Especially when he was permitted to take as much ebony as he needed.

"This one thinks that these weapons should be ready to slay any enemy that is unfortunate enough to cross your path," he purred, stroking the new war scythe, "But a masterpiece of a weapon such as this needs a name. It would be a shame otherwise, to allow a fine piece of craftsmanship such as this to be known by no name,"

Yang made a mock cough. "Well, Mr. Best-blacksmith-this-side-of-the-galaxy, you sure are full of yourself. Sure that title isn't the best in the universe?"

"What can this one say? This one _knows_ he is the best. That scythe-sniper should be all but unbreakable now, and the blade should be hard and sharp enough to carve into even vehicle armour plating. The same goes for the spikes on your shotgun-gauntlets,"

"Well, there's that, I guess. You're not bad at making it better, but couldn't you have...you know, made it in the right colours?"

"The last time this one has checked, there was an invention called paint," Ma'jhad said, thumbing at the cans of paint on the spraying booth behind him, "But this one has no time to apply paint just yet. Function must take precedence before form,"

"Well, _I_ , for one, approve of _this_ ," Weiss cried out happily. She held the new Myrtenaster in one hand, her face contorting in deep concentration; an intense field of bluish-white energy immediately enveloped the black blade of the rapier. She thrust it into a nearby test dummy, literally _melting_ through the dense steel plates covering its torso with very little effort. "Energy projectors on the blade itself, beside the Dust ports? This is brilliant!"

"Why can't I have something like that?" Yang grumbled, now looking at her spiked gauntlets with a little bit of disappointment.

"This one remembers that Miss Blondie said that she wanted something to 'beat their faces in'. One does not simply beat in a molten face," replied the Khajiit with a nonchalant shrug.

"Fine. Guess it's my fault, then. Hey, kittycat, what'd the big kitty here give you?"

Silence.

"...Blakey?"

More silence.

"Oh come on, where'd you go?" Yang sighed, not noticing the faintly-shimmering patch of empty space beside her.

One that had a conspicuous ribbon-shaped object above where its head should be.

* * *

A/N

Proceedeth most urgentlike. Lord Rugdumph of Oblivion had the best lines of all the games xD And the fact that he's completely, utterly dead serious when delivering his lines makes it even better. It's like he genuinely believes that he's sounding like a refined nobleman, and not some foolish fop that's butchering the language every time he speaks! XD

So, after a quick break to Nirn, our group is about to return to Beacon Academy again. Let's see if things will change...


	13. 13 - Satellite in Orbit

"Shields at full strength. Hull is completely undamaged. All systems nominal," the admiral on bridge spoke, "Interplanar transition complete, Your Majesty,"

As he turned around to face the rest of the others on the command deck, however, he noticed the stunned expressions on Team RWBY's faces. "Huh. I guess it's the first time that you all have been in space? I had the very same reaction myself, when I was just a kid,"

"Y-yes, it's definitely our first time up here. First time anyone from Remnant has been here, actually," stammered Weiss, not sure whether what she was seeing was real or not. The fragmented moon, the stars; even the bright yellow sun that was peeking behind the blue-green marble that was apparently Remnant; it was all surreal to her. "How...why did we appear here? Wasn't the portal near Beacon Academy?"

"Well, after more than a few curious bystanders attempted to move through the portal despite our warnings to refrain from doing so, we decided the safest place to put it is somewhere that it can't be reached. Which is to say, in orbit,"

"Hey, look, there's Patch," Ruby said, pointing at a tiny island just west of Vale, "Looks really...really small from up here...doesn't it?"

"Yes. Yes, it does," murmured Blake, quietly observing the other continents, "Everything looks really tiny from here,"

The group simply stood there in silence, contemplating the sight of their home planet. How strange it was that something so large could be so small from a distance; and then smaller still, when compared to the vastness of the great blackness that was the void. Even the sun that seemed to dominate the horizon on the surface was little more than a small circle of burning yellow.

"The vast void does make one wonder about one's place in the Aurbis. I am not sure whether you will live to see Remnant unified under a single government before your hair turns grey. If at all possible within one human lifetime," Valeria spoke, breaking them all out of their thoughts.

A human lifetime. That was what was bothering Weiss' thoughts all this time. She had seen Khajiit in the University and around the palace; some were clearly aged, and all of them had said that they were less than seventy years of age. Yet the Archmage was hundreds of years old, and appeared to be still youthful; as was her fiancee, who looked to be barely older than herself.

"Archmage," she started to speak; Valeria turned her head to look straight into the heiress' eyes, "I've...met several Khajiit. Older ones, in fact. They say that they're only a bit older than seventy, but...all of them are losing their teeth, and their fur is falling out and turning a bit grey. How is it that you look...well, _unchanged..._?"

A frown formed on Valeria's face. "Not here. Follow me to my private suite," she replied darkly, after a moment of deliberation, "Yes, that means all of you, Team RWBY. Admiral, please let Inquisitor J'Bari know that I desire her presence in my room on the double,"

"As you command, Your Majesty. Shall I request for Archmage Serana to be present as well?"

"That should not be necessary, but thank you for the foresight to offer,"

A growing feeling of dread started to form in Weiss' stomach. It was as though she had asked something completely and utterly wrong. Like a topic that should not have been touched at all. "I mean, if it's not too much to ask-"

"No. I can see that you have thought about this question for some time. You will eventually discover the truth, in any case, given both your and Miss Belladonna's propensity for reading. Thus, it is much better for you and the rest of your team if they would hear it from myself, instead of you forming your own conclusions about what I am,"

In short order, the team found themselves in Valeria's private suite, with J'Bari already waiting inside. The younger Khajiit was already inside, wearing her Inquisitor uniform; Ruby could see the dull black gleam of an ebony breastplate underneath the black and silver cloak and hooded robes that she was wearing. Why she was in full combat gear was beyond her comprehension.

"Fortis. Seal my door, and disable all audio and video feeds," Valeria ordered to the ship's onboard spirit. A dull clank and hum signalled to her that the deed was done, and the heavy metal door that led inside was sealed and shielded, with J'Bari taking her position by the door. Turning to Team RWBY, she said tersely, "Have a seat. This will not be a quick or easy explanation,"

Sighing, Valeria looked at Blake. "Miss Belladonna. How have the Faunus been treated in Remnant?"

"Horribly. They're treated as second-class citizens. A lot of humans don't want to associate with them. They're often seen as being little better than animals; people just...prefer to push them away, or to bully them. And _some_ companies-" she glared pointedly in Weiss' direction, "-prefer to use Faunus as slave labour. Indentured workers with little to no rights or pay, and excessive working hours,"

The subtle jab was not missed by Valeria. For the briefest of moments, Blake flinched as she saw a look of unbridled fury on the Archmage's face, which was quickly schooled into an expression of complete indifference. The thick layer of frost and jagged ice forming on her seat, however, told a different story. She was utterly livid.

"We will discern the truth of this matter later, Miss Schnee. Know that my Empire has recently gone to war with another galactic power over the enslavement of both my citizens and that of other galactic civilisations, and this knowledge may very well adversely affect your father's company as a supplier to my storehouses,"

Weiss opened her mouth to retort with one of the Schnee Dust Company's public relations slogans, but closed it when Valeria gave her a warning glare.

"In any event...Miss Belladonna, what if I told you of a...group that was treated worse than the Faunus?"

"Worse than Faunus? In the _Empire_?" Blake replied incredulously, "I can't imagine that. I mean, you've got Khajiit and Argonians that are accepted-" she glanced at J'Bari, who had narrowed her eyes and flattened her ears with a hiss, "-no offense, of course. It's still kind of hard for me to imagine that. I mean, you have humans who apparently do not care for appearances, and of course you're the head of the Empire,"

"Well, that much is true. Legally, Argonians and Khajiit, and even the snakelike Tsaesci of Akavir are equal to any man or mer. Many of my advisors are either Argonian or Khajiit, and even one planetary governor of mine is a Tsaesci. Whom, I might add, has not had the temerity to embezzle Imperial funds, unlike many of the other men that claim to serve myself. Even laws prohibiting unions between any of the so-called beast races and man have been repealed almost thirteen hundred years ago. A man or woman may wed whomever he or she desires, irrespective of gender, race or faith,"

"Wow. And here I thought Vale was accepting, seeing as Faunus are allowed to walk around without being harmed," muttered Blake, still partly in disbelief that a nation could be so...open.

"Indeed. While I am less than impressed about what I have read and heard of Atlas and the way it treats its Faunus citizens, their treatment is still lenient compared to the group that I will speak of,"

"What's this group, Miss Septim?" Ruby asked, wondering exactly what could be so bad.

"Miss Schnee, Miss Xiao Long. You are both studying Restoration, are you not? Tell me, then. Have you read the books on the treatment of mundane and supernatural wounds, poisons and diseases?"

"Yes, but...I'm not seeing the connection," Weiss answered, trying to recall the contents of the rather thick book. It was late at night when she read it, after all, and she was half-asleep as she was leafing through the pages.

"Porphyric haemophilia. Do you recall what it is?"

"Porphyric..." muttered the heiress. Her eyes widened as she remembered what the common name of that disease was, and immediately stood up, backing away from Valeria.

The fur that looked as though it had been bleached white. The oversized fangs, even by Khajiit standards. Those predatory eyes. They matched the symptoms of the dreaded disease.

"Weiss, what's going on?" Ruby asked, bewildered by her reaction.

"Ruby, she's a _vampire_! She feeds on humanblood!" Weiss cried out, still fearful. When Yang and Blake registered what she had just said, they too started to back away from the white-furred Khajiit.

Valeria simply sighed and shook her head, as if seeing a reaction that she had seen at least ten thousand times over. "Correct, Miss Schnee. It is one of the names for blood-transmissible vampirism; the other being Sanguinare Vampiris. I am surprised that someone who is as well-read as you are has not deduced that fact for so long. Why do you think I am not present at mealtimes, when everyone else is dining in the hall? And I am certain that you have noticed that even J'Bari, though a Khajiit, does not have the excessively long fangs that I have. If you will sit down, then we shall continue this discussion in a civilised manner. I have not finished my tale, and you four will listen to me,"

None of the three that had stood up moved a single step.

"Guys, come on!" Ruby pleaded, "She hasn't done anything bad to us. I mean, she's even teaching us, right?"

"For the last few months, and the coming few months, yes,"

When none of them moved, the red scythe-wielder stood up and approached Valeria, throwing her arms around the ancient Khajiit. Stiffly, Valeria raised a hand and stroked Ruby's back gently, purring all the while. She even rubbed her forehead up against Ruby's cheek, eliciting giggles from the young girl.

"See? She's not going to bite you. Come on, Yang, Blake, Weiss? Sit down, please?"

Reluctantly, the rest of Team RWBY nodded and slowly reassumed their seats, though they still viewed Valeria warily.

"While I do not appreciate being addressed like an untamed creature, your assistance is otherwise appreciated, Miss Rose. Thank you," Valeria chuckled, sending Ruby back to her seat, "Yes. I am a vampire. And centuries ago, your reactions would be considered mild. Silver crossbow bolts, garlic-infused stakes and conflagrations would have been the more expected response. A touch more violent than humans' reactions to Faunus on Remnant,"

"Do you really drink blood?" blurted out Yang, who flinched when Ruby glared daggers at her, "Sorry Rubes, it really had to be asked,"

"Well, now I know that you have not read your assigned texts, Miss Xiao Long. Thank you for admitting it indirectly," said the vampiric Archmage, smiling, "The answer is no. I have long found an...alternative source of nourishment. I no longer require blood to sustain my good health, though the alternative is far less appealing to taste,"

"Which is...?"

The Khajiit gave an almost imperceptible shudder. "Filled soul gems, powdered, and mixed with strong alcoholic drinks. And before you ask, I only accept animal souls,"

Which may have been a terrible, _terrible_ answer for people arriving from Remnant, a world filled with very powerful and active souls. The looks of utter revulsion that the young girls gave her reminded her so much of the Dawnguard agents that it took every bit of self-control she had to not lash out at them as though they were part of the vampire-hunting group.

"You eat. Souls," Yang said, almost spitting out the last word, "Gee, thanks, now I feel a _little_ bit safer,"

"Indeed, Miss Xiao Long. Animal blood is insufficient to maintain the good health of a vampire, and devouring the blood of my subjects runs counter to everything that I am trying to do for them,"

"And what is it that you are trying to achieve? Why stay a vampire?" Weiss demanded.

"Because the alternative, Miss Schnee, is unthinkable," answered Valeria darkly, "I was raised in an environment of civil war. Brother killed brother, sister killed sister. Strangers killed each other for every last scrap of authority and power. My grandfather, Uriel Septim, the seventh of his name, left no legitimate heirs to the throne. Every last one of his legitimate children were killed by assassins hoping to bring about an invasion by the Daedric Prince Mehrunes Dagon, the Prince of Destruction. Only my father survived; an illegitimate child, born of a tryst with a court lady,"

Silence fell on the group. "Why?" Ruby managed to croak out, "Why would they do that...?"

"There are some who would simply watch the world burn, Miss Rose. Either for their own power, or through sheer lunacy. Perhaps both. In any case, my mother and my father fought the endless forces of Oblivion in an effort to stall the impending invasion. Eventually, they fell in love with each other, and of that union came myself. An illegitimate child of an illegitimate child, of a union that was forbidden and reviled at the time. My identity and existence was struck from official records in an effort to keep myself safe, as though my father had never sired children, and that my mother had simply begotten a child from another man she had met in a tavern,"

"That's...horrible," Weiss murmured. Though her father was cold to her, at least she still had family to return to, as unwelcoming as they usually were. To be literally erased from records for the entirety of your childhood, and raised as though you were a mistake? That was something else entirely.

"Indeed. At the very least, I had inherited my mother's intellect and gift of manipulating the energies of Aetherius. Archmage Polus raised me as though I were his own daughter, teaching myself everything he knew of magicka. Through an...unfortunate incident...I became a vampire at twenty-one years of age. Soon after that, the Third Aldmeri Dominion seceded from the Empire, and thus began a civil war lasting five bloody years,"

"Third Aldmeri Dominion? What's that?"

Valeria's eyes narrowed. "A confederation of elven states in the southwest of the Empire. Elven supremacists, who believe that humans were fit only to lick the soles of their boots. And if one thought that being a second-class citizen was a poor prospect, let it be known that the beastfolk were treated as little better than vermin at the time. If the Schnee Dust Company truly pays their Faunus workers a pittance for honest work, then that is a fortune greater than what the elves paid the beastfolk for their work in mines, swamps and farms,"

"A fortune more...?" Blake gasped, aghast. If the paltry sum of fifty lien a week for the average mine worker – hardly enough to even feed one person, let alone a family – was a fortune, then...

"Yes, a fortune more, Miss Belladonna. The Khajiiti commonfolk of Elsweyr, and the Argonians of Black Marsh were simply slaves to attend to every whim of their elven and human overlords, no matter what was claimed to the contrary. Their wages were the lash of their slave drivers, and the mouldy stale scraps of bread that came from mansion kitchens. If a slave died, their bodies were simply fed to the skeevers as a burial plot or a cremation was far too expensive. Miss Schnee, I do hope that you see why I will not deal with slavers. You can rest assured that if the Schnee Dust Company does not change its questionable labour practices, the first shipment of Dust will be the last that we will purchase,"

"Well...I suppose what you've just told us explains your dislike of slavery..." Weiss said carefully, hoping to not jeopardise the SDC deal any further than it already was, "I'll try to speak to my father when I next get the chance and try to change his viewpoint. But you still haven't told us why you chose to remain a vampire,"

"Ah, but I am about to reach the core of my tale. You see, over the next two hundred years, I wandered Tamriel. Archmage Polus died in his sleep one night, and his successor was not particularly keen on sheltering an illegitimate child of an Archmage that had long disappeared. I was sent out with my staff, a pouch of gold that I had saved over the years, and a letter of recommendation for the College of Winterhold. I served in every Jarl's court as a healer and a wizard, careful to not stay long enough that I would attract attention for being a Khajiit that never aged. But over time, I learned enough to know what truly allowed one to make a difference in the world. Especially from all the court intrigue of ages past,"

"And that is...?"

"The power of love, my dears. One can be filled by bright ideas, by concern and love for her fellows, or by a burning desire to have justice be upheld. Pursuing these ideas on one's own, while a worthy ideal, will only allow one to save a few at a time. With a group, perhaps you can save several. But to truly work a change upon a people? One requires the power of a nation. The entirety of its populace,"

She lifted a hand to the red diamond necklace on her breast, which now radiated power. Caressing it gently, she closed her eyes. "And the power of a nation is only as strong as its ruler's capabilities. The Mede Dynasty – the ones that usurped the Imperial Throne after my father's sacrifice – proved that. The people suffered. Famine, war, plague and unrest ravaged the land as the False Kings scrabbled over the scraps of a fallen empire to carve out their own realm. The selfish actions of a few caused the untold suffering of millions. I recall wandering the slums of Windhelm, where sickly infants cried out for their famished mothers; I recall healing the wounded of wars fought between cousins of the Medes, who never seemed content with how much land each was apportioned. So much blood spilled, so many lives lost, all for their own avarice!"

Valeria then stood up. With eyes full of conviction, she now looked each member of Team RWBY squarely in the eyes. "I have lived through an age of depravity. I have seen the depths to which man could sink in his avarice. I have seen the unbearable suffering of those too weak to have a voice. I have seen the glory of a past empire, tarnished by the actions of its pathetic, cowardly usurpers!" she growled, her voice rising in fervour, "The ruler of an empire possesses a divine mandate to look after its own people, just as the people serve the empire. I swore to myself that I would sooner die than allow my Empire to sink back into its darkest times. The people of the Empire are my children, and no mother should ever allow a single one to go to bed hungry, cold and miserable. Not a single one. Not as I still live and breathe!"

Silence. Not a single one of them spoke as the Empress now sank back into a plush chair, which was by now a block of ice in the shape of a chair.

Yang was the first to break the silence. "Wow. Didn't think you were...that dedicated, Archmage. That really doesn't sound easy to do. I still don't know what to think about you eating souls, but...yeah, I'll just stop talking now,"

"I will admit that there are days where I wish I could simply retire to continue my magickal research in private," sighed Valeria, "And that every day is a struggle to maintain my hold over my vampiric impulses for blood, as soul gems do not...well, they do not taste very pleasing at all,"

"...You did mention that you had to mix the powder with alcohol, correct?" Weiss spoke, tapping a finger to her chin, "I'm sure that I could convince father to part with some of his finest wine for you..."

"Hm. Alcohol is a good way to ease social conversations, Miss Schnee; but it is certainly not an appropriate way to expedite business dealings. Still, it is far more subtle than your previous attempts at acquiring favourable deals," Valeria chided, earning a 'drat!' from the heiress, "Still, we will make a fine businesswoman out of you yet,"

"Hey guys!" Ruby cried out, causing everyone to look at her. "All this talking about heavy stuff is making me kinda...I don't know, worried. Everyone's still okay with each other, right?"

"Yeah. No objections with me, Rubes," Yang said, shrugging, "I mean, if you still aren't convinced after the Archcat's speech, I'm not sure what would convince you that she's a good person behind those fangs and icicles. Just...uh...don't bite us or something, right? Blakey?"

"Anyone that tries to make everyone equal is good in my books," the cat faunus said, shrugging as she gave Valeria a rare genuine smile, "I just wish that maybe, one day, someone could do the same for us Faunus in Remnant,"

"One day at a time, Miss Belladonna. Form your alliances, earn the goodwill of others, and perhaps one day you might make it happen yourself. After all, is assisting others not the goal of your chosen profession?"

"Yeah, that's true. Maybe someday. Wait, does that mean you're willing to help us?!"

"Okay! So that means everyone is now back together!" cheered Ruby, earning her a smile from Valeria. The energetic girl was very infectious indeed. "You know what this means? GROUP HUG!"

Valeria's smile started to falter. One energetic girl hugging her was improper enough. But a whole _group_ of them?!

"Yeah!" cried Yang, turning towards Valeria, whose ears were now flat against her skull.

"J'Bari, please assist," she whispered, looking in the direction of where her bodyguard was standing. Only to find that said bodyguard was now standing beside Ruby, a mischievous glint in her eye.

"This one must refuse. This one believes that Your Majesty must be reminded of her subjects' adoration for her," purred J'Bari, winking at Ruby.

"Traitor!" Valeria screeched, right before the entire group devolved into a tangle of limbs.

* * *

A/N:

Something a bit different this time. A bit more serious in subject matter, but is necessary to strengthen the relationship between Valeria and Team RWBY before we launch into the second semester of Beacon Academy.

An interesting bit of reading: Read up on the Mandate of Heaven (Chinese divine right theory). It's actually quite interesting as a take on the counterbalancing forces of rights and obligations of a monarch with relation to their subjects.

Allard-Liao: Well, this chapter just answered your review, didn't it? :P

ArtyomXIII: Yes, it is indeed the Elder Scrolls universe fast forwarded one and a half thousand years into the future. It's actually based on my prior Elder Scrolls x Mass Effect fic, Imperium Aeternit. You can find it on my profile page, as fanfiction dot net does not like crosslinking HTMLs.

Stay tuned, folks. And don't forget that you can leave me questions and comments, and I'll try to get back to them!


	14. Christmas Special: Winter Solstice

"...And your vassals are requesting your presence on the first of Morning Star, for the festivities of the New Life Festival. Please do not forget about Archduke Vilren's appointment on the fifteenth,"

Valeria was sitting down at her desk in her Beacon Academy office, barely keeping herself awake. Her fingers hovered unsteadily over the holographic keyboard of her dataslate, typing in replies to the various messages that she was receiving from her numerous governors. Most were asking for her presence on some day or another to deal with some trivial nuisance that she was absolutely certain _didn't_ need her presence; others were begging for additional resources to be sent from the Imperial storehouses, as apparently their own resources were too little to be useful. Others yet were asking for the deployment of more Inquisitors, pleading that Citadel Council spies were still infiltrating their domains despite their best efforts to uphold security.

She yawned and looked outside at the snow that was gently drifting down in the moonlit sky. She had been at work since before the sun had even risen above the horizon; and now it was well past dusk, seeing as the shattered moon was looming over the horizon. Looking at the mountain of dataslates still on the left side of her desk, she was instantly reminded of just how much work she still had to do. All of her six assistants on the _Wrath of Talos_ had taken their leave to visit their families back on Nirn for the Winter Solstice festivals, leaving her with the administrative work required to maintain the Empire.

"Twenty-four hours in a day is far too short," she grumbled, picking up the next dataslate and activating it, barely listening to the recorded message inside, "Why can I not have twenty-five, Father Akatosh? Or perhaps thirty?"

A number of empty potion bottles were scattered on the floor beside her desk, as she continued to drink stamina potions to keep herself awake. Another one joined its empty brethren soon after she had finished listening to the message and typed out another reply. But when she reached out for another, she found her supply depleted.

"Oh, for the love of Talos..." she hissed exhaustedly, dropping her head onto the desk. There were still at least another thirty messages to listen to by the end of the day, and she just _had_ to run out of stamina potions.

Maybe she could craft some more? No, the plants were all withered and dormant for winter. She looked outside, thinking that perhaps she could get some more from her dreadnought. Then she remembered that it had been ordered to remain in geosynchronous orbit, in an agreement with Professor Ozpin to avoid making people nervous. After all, a five-kilometre, heavily-armed warship parked near a city did not exactly send a message of peace.

Perhaps she could call one of her students and see if they had some to spare. As she recalled, Blake was a rather avid potioncrafter that liked to make potions out of literally everything she could get her hands on. "Hmm. Perhaps Miss Belladonna has a few that she may be able to spare..." she murmured tiredly to herself, pulling out her scroll and dialling in Blake's number.

The device buzzed once. Twice. Three times. It was almost hypnotic, the way that the rhythmic buzzing sounded. Rather relaxing, rather like purring. "Maybe I shall call later. A five-minute nap has never hurt anyone..." Valeria yawned, crossing her arms on an empty space on her desk and putting her head down on top.

* * *

"Blakey, who called?" asked Yang curiously, wondering who had made the call at such a late hour. The students were having a Winter Solstice party in the common room, which was already in full swing; Team RWBY and Team JNPR were all in the room, gathered around a warm, crackling log fire in a fireplace, all while singing songs at the top of their voices. J'Bari had managed to sneak in a crate of alcoholic beverages under the guise of 'alchemical reagents', and more than a few of them held bottles of spiced mead and honeyed brandy in their hands. Nevertheless, a few of them had to remain _somewhat_ sober, in the event that either the Madgod decided to crash the party, or one of them needed help finding the nearest bathroom.

Blake, fortunately, was one of those who opted to remain sober, along with J'Bari. The khajiit peeked over the cat faunus' shoulder at her scroll, and immediately recognised the number. "This one recognises that as Her Majesty's number. But this one is confused. Surely Her Majesty would not be working on a festival night?"

"No. You have to be joking, right?" Yang gasped, aghast, "Working. During the holidays? That has to be a crime,"

"This one would not be surprised. Her Majesty has few reasons to rest...but even fewer reasons to call. Still, this one must admit that she is somewhat curious, and somewhat worried. Would Blake be willing to accompany J'Bari to check on Her Majesty?"

Blake took one look at the rest of the party and nodded quickly. Ruby was pressing a white chocolate chip cookie up against her nose with quite a bit of effort; whatever the red scythe-wielder was attempting to do, she didn't want to clean up after her. "Yeah, sure. Lead on,"

"Oh come on, Blakey, I'll get cold all by myself," whined Yang as Blake got up from the blonde's lap. J'Bari grinned and waved a bottle of rum in front of her. "Okay, kittycat. Okay. You drive a hard deal, but I'll take it,"

"Great. Looks like I've been replaced by a bottle of alcohol," Blake said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

When they arrived at Valeria's office, the two of them noticed nothing wrong. The door was sealed, and when J'Bari cast a quick diagnostic spell, all of the security wards were still in place.

"This one is confused," J'Bari said, scratching her head, "All the protective wards are still intact. There is no tampering here, and Her Majesty would have disabled them if she wished one of us to come. Still, perhaps it is best if her safety is made certain. Stand back,"

The khajiit muttered words of power under her breath, sending small sparks of magicka into the faintly glowing door. One by one, the layers of shields and explosive runes disarmed themselves, until only the physical door remained. Testing the door, she found that it was not even locked.

"Your Majesty? This one wonders if you have called," J'Bari called out, pushing open the door. The lights were still on. Two huge stacks of dataslates were on the lone study desk on the other side of the room, along with numerous empty bottles on the ground beside the desk. And behind the desk was Valeria, snoring softly face-down into her arms on top of the desk.

Blake walked in carefully, picking up a potion bottle and taking a gentle sniff. "J'Bari, this smells like...honey. And giant aloe vera," After picking up another one and sniffing that one too, she added, "This one, as well. They're stamina restoratives,"

"And this one counts at least two dozen empty bottles," the khajiit spoke, shaking her head, "This one cannot believe that Her Majesty would be so careless as to rely on stamina restoratives to continue working. Overuse of potions is harmful to one's physical health,"

A particularly loud snore broke both of their trains of thought. The Empress was clearly exhausted; and a desk was not a particularly comfortable place to sleep. Even with arms as a cushion. "Well, this one thinks that we cannot simply leave her here. We must make sure that she takes a rest,"

"Do we...uh...where's Serana tonight, anyway?"

"This one believes that Archmage Volkihar is onboard the _Wrath of Talos_ , in the place of Her Majesty. She cannot come at this time,"

"But we can't leave her here, right? That doesn't look very comfortable,"

"Indeed. This one did not suggest such a thing," J'Bari spoke, thinking. Then, an idea came to her mind, and she grinned, "This one has an idea..."

* * *

"HASKILL! I'M BORED!"

"Yes, Your Glorious Highness?"

"It's SOLSTICE, and that means that people are enjoying themselves! Enjoying themselves! And I'm here, in my little throne, _bored_. A bored Madgod!" Ra'shamarra exclaimed, stamping her feet irritably, causing a jester's hat to fall from her head. "Bah, they just don't make these hats like they used to. But why would jesters use hats anyway? Rats are also good at telling jokes. As do cats. Or were they bats? Ah, who cares! I'm STILL bored,"

"Evidently, Your Glorious Highness," Haskill drawled in response, rolling his eyes.

"Well, since YOU'RE apparently more bored than I am, how about you do something for me. What's my daughter doing in this festive season? Being boring and working through it all?"

The seneschal of madness sighed and pulled out a scrying orb from his pocket. A soft glow came from within it, into which he stared. "No. She is not currently working,"

"Not currently working? Why, what is this madness?! Surely she is working! She always has been working on this day, for every day for the last thousand years!"

"I suppose you might want to see the evidence for yourself then, Your Glorious Highness,"

* * *

When Valeria's foggy mind next registered reality, she found herself resting on something rather soft and warm. The loud music and laughter grated on her ears, and she promptly flattened them against her head. But when even that failed to work, she snuggled deeper into whatever it was that she was resting on.

"Come on. This one thinks that it is time to wake up,"

"Five more minutes, mother," she mumbled indistinctly, nuzzling further into the warmth. It wasn't every day that she felt this comfortable and warm – and with a pillow that smelled much like muted catnip and lavender.

Catnip and lavender?

"Wow, are you sure that you're not cheating on me, Blake? The Archcat looks real comfortable," Yang giggled, causing Valeria to sit up bolt upright with an undignified yowl, her cheeks burning. She was glad for once that khajiit fur obstructed all view of her skin; she was certain that she must be about as red as the cloaks on the Imperial Guards by now. Blake had an amused smirk on her face as she gave a small wave in the direction of Valeria.

"Miss Belladonna? My...sincerest apologies. I must have fallen asleep in my work..." Valeria murmured in embarrassment, taking in the sight of a very festive students' common room. Decorations in green, red and white dangled from every corner, and a rather tiny pine tree had been set up in the corner, "This...does not appear to be my office. I do not understand,"

"Oh, come off it, Archcat! The office? _Really_?" Yang groaned, jumping on the seat between Valeria and Blake and throwing one arm around her shoulders, "It's Winter Solstice! Nobody works on this day!"

"I still had at least another three hours of work to complete. If you will excuse me, Miss Xiao Long," Valeria spoke. She gently brushed away Yang's hand and tried to stand up, only to fall back into the seat when the whole world started to spin and her legs felt like jelly. "Hm. That has not happened before,"

A familiar face loomed over her. "Your Majesty, J'Bari must insist that you remain here for the rest of the night, where this one can monitor you until a trained healer can arrive in the morning," J'Bari said, shaking her head, "This one is amazed that you have forgotten about at-Amal's First Law on the safety of alchemical products. No more than four potions of any strength in fifteen minutes, no more than ten in an hour, and no more than sixteen in a single day, unless one wished to find themselves in a healer's office very quickly. And yet this one has found at least twenty-four empty bottles of stamina potion in your office,"

"The Empire does not function on its own, J'Bari. Without my assistants, there is nobody else to coordinate efforts to maximal efficiency," she said weakly.

"And without you, there is no Empire. You _are_ the Empire, Your Majesty. If help is what you required, then you should have asked myself for assistance,"

"Yeah, Archcat. If you're buried under that much work and it can't wait, you might as well ask for my help too. At least with more people you might actually be able to enjoy a party afterwards,"

"Me too, Miss!"

"I would have to agree with the dolt here, yes. It seems foolish to work yourself to exhaustion,"

Soon the choruses of agreement echoed around the room. Heat flooded Valeria's face once again, though for a different reason; and she felt herself shed a single tear that she didn't realise she had been holding.

"Why?" she uttered, "This burden is not yours to bear,"

"Unless you're an Ursa, I don't think it's _anyone's_ burden to _bear._ Get it, guys?" Yang said, earning her a chorus of boos and groans from both teams present, "Oh geez, get a sense of humour!"

"I think that your sense of humour is childish, that's what it is," Weiss grumbled, shaking her head. Her gaze softened on Valeria, however, and she said, "But Yang is right. You're working yourself too hard. Friends look after friends. If you needed help, you could've just asked one of us and we would've been happy to help,"

"Friends?" Valeria said slowly, the word almost foreign to her. Acquaintances, contacts, allies, vassals, subjects and courtiers were familiar to her. But never 'friend'. The concept was...odd, in a way.

"Wow. Just wow. Are you telling me you've never had a _friend?_ " Yang gasped, scandalised. "You know, someone that's close to you, that you have fun and hang out with?"

When Valeria's face remained blank, Yang literally facepalmed. Grabbing Ruby and Weiss' hands, she dragged them both onto the sofa that Blake and Valeria were sitting on, forcing them both to hug the elder khajiit, over both Blake and herself. "This is what friends do. We look after each other, we do stupid things just for the sake of doing it, and we have fun in the process. After all that you've done for everyone, it's _criminal_ to think that you've never had a friend,"

That was too much for Valeria. Without thinking, she turned to face Blake and started to rub her forehead against the cat faunus' own, purring loudly in the process.

Only to hear the telltale _whump_ of a portal opening nearby, and the click-snap of a camera.

"Ooooh, I bet Serana is going to love this! Ha!" cackled Ra'shamarra, who had emerged from a portal seconds ago, a large camera in her hands and a shit-eating grin on her face.

"MOTHER!"

* * *

A/N:

This particular episode is not part of the main series in any way, and should not be treated as such.

Merry Christmas, everyone! Hope you're all enjoying yourselves - like you ought to!

ivanruzic, meleesmasher: Also, I did write on the first chapter that this fic's setting is directly taken from Imperium Aeternit, though for most part I'm isolating the Mass Effect part and leaving this as mostly ES.

mangahero: I'm still evaluating whether or not I can actually pull off a sequence of chronological one-shots describing bits of Valeria's history. It's a very different task to writing a traditional structured story.


	15. 14 - Dust Heist of the Century?

"Right, boys. So, let's get to it, then," an orange-haired man spoke crisply, putting on a bowler hat as he tapped on a set of plans with his cane. "So supposedly, there's a massive SDC shipment coming in to Vale today by sea. A really huge amount. Probably more than every bit of Dust that we've stolen so far for the last three months. And word has it that it's only very lightly guarded, as it's due for a pickup sometime tonight,"

"What's this about, Torchwick? Why are you even here?" a red-haired, masked Faunus snarled, stabbing his katana into the nearest table.

"Whoa there, Red. Calm down. I'm only here because our mutual contact suggested that maybe we could help each other. I have the plans, and you have...the manpower,"

"Just spit it out, human,"

"Fine, fine. The shipment's supposedly several of tons of Dust in Vale Harbour. Ship's scheduled to arrive at eight in the evening. There'll be a change of guards at around ten, so that's when we can swoop in with a few Bullheads and take a couple of containers with us,"

"That sounds far too easy, and far too simple. The Schnees are not so careless as to leave a large shipment unguarded,"

"Ah, but that's where you come in. You see, our mutual contact thinks that I need a bit of...backup. You and your boys will be needed to remove all the guards on the ground before I take the Dust away with my ships,"

The red-haired faunus snatched the katana out of the table and had its tip at Torchwick's throat in a flash. "Fine. But only because we're ordered to. If I find that you're just leading us along for nothing, I'll kill you myself,"

"Wouldn't be you without the threats, eh, Adam? Let's get moving, then,"

* * *

Meanwhile, inside an Imperial transport shuttle above Vale...

"So...you're teaching us again, Archmage Septim?!" Ruby spoke excitedly, "Awesome! Can't wait till you show us how to throw those biiiiig fireballs,"

"That would be correct, Miss Rose. However, throwing larger fireballs will be out of your reach in the immediate future, unless you can bring yourself to study and practice outside of class," Valeria said, giving the red reaper a wry smile, "Yes, you may not be enrolled in my Destruction class as a student, but I know that you have been reading through your sister's textbook. Which in itself is not sufficient practice. If you find J'Bari, you may ask her for a magickal sparring session whenever she is idle. I am certain that she would oblige,"

J'Bari nodded towards Ruby, giving her a toothy grin.

"For this evening, however, I am going to inspect the first shipment of Dust that is said to be in Vale Harbour. I am told that it is of prime quality, but I must check on the quality of said goods myself. Miss Schnee, would you care to accompany me for this task?"

"With pleasure, Archmage," Weiss said, giving a slight curtsy. Yang made mock gagging noises, earning a subtle annoyed glare from the heiress.

"In any event, we shall be landing at Beacon shortly. I am informed that there is some sort of festival that is quickly approaching, and that students from other combat academies are coming to Beacon Academy. I should like to ensure that my classroom remains secured,"

"But don't all the exchange students get to pick which classes to enter? What if they pick yours?"

"My initial agreement with Professor Ozpin was that I would teach the students until such time that I discover a method of returning to Nirn. Which, as it stands, I have. Perhaps more successfully than I had initially envisioned, as the portal is now permanent,"

"So...why do you still teach, then? I mean, if that's what you agreed upon with Professor Ozpin, then you don't have to teach any more,"

"It would not do for any teacher of the magickal arts to abandon her students before they are properly instructed in the foundations of the arts. That, and I will say that I find teaching rather...refreshing. After all, once one has held the reins of power for hundreds of years, the meaningless platitudes of courtiers tend to get more than a little stale,"

"I don't know if power can be ridden," Ruby blurted out, trying to say something intelligent but receiving only odd looks in her direction. "What? She said 'reins', so...uh...isn't she talking about some sort of...animal?"

"No, you dolt," Weiss snapped. Sighing afterwards, she shook her head in disbelief. "Seriously, Ruby? She isn't talking about an animal. She's talking about the control of an entire country,"

"Regardless," spoke Valeria, raising a hand to stop any further bickering, "I am going to continue teaching until I have considered every last student that I am currently teaching sufficiently proficient in the magickal arts. I will not, however, take any additional students,"

"But can't you...send someone else from the Arcane University to continue teaching them? I mean, you _are_ the Archmage, after all,"

"An accurate observation, Miss Schnee. It is within my rights as the Archmage to send someone to teach you all. But as it stands, Remnant remains in a state of precarious balance between all the kingdoms. There exists an underlying tension behind the facade of peace. Atlas maintains a large army and fleet, which does not completely match with Professor Ozpin's claims that there exists peace between all the kingdoms. After all, if there truly is peace, why would such a large standing army be necessary? Surely the funds could be better spent on the betterment of living standards,"

She paused for a brief moment and sighed. "No. That army is for defending Atlas against the other kingdoms; or for invading another kingdom, if it is necessary. To throw magickal teachings to one kingdom only would disrupt the natural balance of power on Remnant, and would simply cause conflict,"

"But you're teaching us, aren't you?"

"Indeed, I am. But as I understand, huntsmen and huntresses are defenders of humanity against the Grimm threat. You are not affiliated with any kingdom, and thus no kingdom can claim that another has a...secret weapon, so to speak. Now, enough of this discussion about states and politics. You are all far too young to be concerned about the affairs and ambitions of men too foolish to cling to power for the sake of power,"

* * *

That night, at Vale Harbour...

"Hey, Adam. I haven't seen anyone like these guys before," one of the faunus lieutenants whispered, eyeing the two guards present on the site.

The tall, hulking personnel were clad head-to-toe in some strange golden coloured plate armour, complete with long, flowing crimson cloaks. They looked nothing like the usual Vale Police Department officers; no hat, no badge, no rank patch. Even their weapons looked more like those wielded by Huntsmen; both had tower shields as large as they were tall strapped to their left arms, with savage-looking chainsaw-blades in their right.

"They aren't police officers. They look more like mercenaries, and too heavily armed to be Huntsmen," he replied, narrowing his eyes. Both were still alert and pacing about in front of the two SDC shipping containers that they were guarding. In the centre of the concrete pier, no less; with almost a hundred metres of open space between them and the nearest cover, and six floodlights scanning the area around them, there was no way of approaching without being spotted.

"What's your call, Adam? Do we go for it, or do we wait for that slimeball, Torchwick?"

"We wait and see. If Torchwick can deal with these guys, then we let him deal with it. Have we dealt with all the other guards in the area?"

"Yes. Every last police officer in the docks are out...permanently,"

"Then we wait,"

It turned out that they did not have to wait very long. Soon, a black limousine drove up towards the container. The guards initially raised their shields in the direction of the vehicle, but then relaxed when it drew closer. What he saw next caused him to wonder what exactly was it that he was seeing.

A white, leopard-like humanoid cat climbed out of the centre compartment. A new kind of faunus, perhaps? Female, by the shape of her body – and very wealthy and eccentric, if the rich purple and gold robes were any indication. There was a golden staff in her right hand with what looked like a giant ruby on top, in the same style as the crown perched on her head. After her came another lynx-like female grey tabby that also walked on both legs, though much shorter than the first. She, too, was holding a staff, though he could see a long, narrow shortsword strapped to her leg in its sheath. She held herself with purpose beside the first, purposely putting herself between the first one and any darker corners of the area, perhaps in anticipation of an attack. A bodyguard of sorts, perhaps?

Then came a blonde human girl in a yellow crop-top and a tan vest, and a ridiculously short pair of short shorts. Clinging on to her, and nuzzling into her hair, much to his disgust, however, was a certain faunus that he had been seeking for quite some time.

"Blake. Now I've found you again, my love," he chuckled to himself, fingering his katana as he thought about what he would do to her. Her betrayal was still fresh on his mind, even though she had left him months ago.

And then right after the pair had disembarked from the limousine, came another human girl with long, flowing white hair in a side ponytail. With the Schnee family snowflake embroidered on the back of her dress. His grin continued to widen as his night continued to get better. The Schnee heiress and his love in one place, at the same time? This was truly his night. If Torchwick could do what he said he would do, then he would get both the Schnee heiress _and_ Blake. Two birds with one stone!

"Adam, that slimeball's asking if the area's clear. He's coming in with his bullheads and delaying his approach, but Vale air control is getting suspicious about his movements,"

"Get him in. I want a distraction, and he'll provide one for us. Have some of our White Fang forces come with him if things get too difficult, but I want to watch what happens first,"

* * *

"At ease, Centurions. These are my guests, and I have authorised them to come with me for this...evaluation,"

"By your order, Your Majesty," the two men responded in unison, snapping one fist over their hearts in a salute.

"Have there been any suspicious activities thus far?"

"No, Your Majesty. Things have been quiet tonight, and we have requested that the Dust containers be moved to an open space so that it is easier to ensure that no intruders approach. So far, there has been nothing,"

The Empress sniffed the air and narrowed her eyes at a nearby alleyway, behind a shipping hangar. She saw several shapes moving about in the darkness. Man-sized shapes, in a place completely devoid of light.

There were only three types of people that moved about in complete darkness; assassins, thieves, and spies. All of which were utter scum to her, fit only for extermination. "Team RWBY. I do hope that you have brought your weapons with you," she growled, slamming her the bottom of her staff into the ground. A brilliant greenish-white blade of pure magicka erupted from the top of her staff, shaping itself into the blade of a war scythe. "I believe that we are not alone. Centurions! To arms!"

They stood and waited, scanning the area for any movement. Ruby threw about several balls of magickal light, helping to further illuminate the docks; Valeria and J'Bari hovered above the containers, using their nightvision to search for any potential miscreants. Weiss, Blake and Yang formed up around their team leader, guarding her from anyone that tried to creep up on them.

"This one hears something," J'Bari whispered. Her ears pricked up at attention, trying to locate the direction of the sound. "Engines. Very loud engines. Perhaps the aircraft that you call 'bullheads',"

Sure enough, the engine noises grew louder and louder, to the point where even those without enhanced hearing could hear them. A trio of bullheads emerged from the direction of the ocean, speeding towards them. And when Weiss looked over in the direction that they came from, she noticed that there were several dark figures pouring into the open clearing from behind various shipping containers in the dockyard.

"White Fang!" she yelled out, noticing the emblems and their masks. One of the bullheads opened fire with its chin-mounted autocannon, strafing the party with hundreds of high-calibre shells; the centurions locked their shields together and planted themselves firmly in front of Team RWBY, absorbing the majority of the shots. J'Bari dived behind a container as the vehicle strafed her post on top of a shipping container; Valeria, on the other hand, lazily held up a hand and conjured a glowing shield, deflecting every single shell meant for her, redirecting them straight into the water.

One of the bullheads then began to descend, landing on the dock. The back cargo ramp opened up, revealing a white-coated orange-haired man that Team RWBY recognised all too well, along with numerous White Fang foot soldiers.

"Roman Torchwick," Weiss hissed, clicking in an ice Dust charge in her rapier.

"I take it that you are acquainted with this...fellow, Miss Schnee?" Valeria asked, casting a glance towards the man. He walked with the self-assured swagger of a noble, yet his crooked grin was that of a scoundrel. A thief, then, considering that an assassin cared little about how he was seen, and a spy was careful to not be conspicuous.

"Yeah. He's a thief; he's suspected of all the Dust store robberies and burglaries in Vale for the last six months,"

"And Vale's law enforcement has been inept enough to see him evade capture for this long?" Valeria spoke incredulously, still surveying Torchwick as he approached with his men. When both Weiss and Blake nodded in response, her lips twitched into a crooked grin. "I see. A rogue, and a wanted man? Then I assume that there would be no reason that anyone would ever miss his existence,"

At that point, Blake's knees gave way, and she found herself scampering in fear behind the two centurions. Gone was any semblance of friendliness in Valeria's manner; her eyes were narrowed to blazing golden slits. Cold fury radiated from her, an almost palpable wave of bone-chilling cold and controlled rage; like a raging river of icy water, barely held back by the flimsiest of walls. Every instinct in Blake's body screamed at her to run; to flee, and find the deepest, darkest hole that she could hide in and hope that she was never found. Only when her hand was seized by Yang did she recall that Valeria was on _her_ side, and not the enemy.

" **Joorre. Meyye joorre!** " she roared, a thunderous roar that shook the ground, " **Bo, grind hin oblaan!** "

"What's she saying?!" Ruby shouted, her ears still ringing as she fired on the bullheads flying above them. She fired several shots after them, to little effect.

"Killing them may not be advisable, Your Majesty. You are not in your own domain, after all,"

Valeria cast an annoyed glance at J'Bari, but otherwise nodded; the energy blade vanished from the tip of the elder khajiit's staff. One of the bullheads passing overhead made another strafing run on the group, forcing Valeria to throw up another barrier to protect them all; this time, however, she had enough of it and hurled a blindingly-bright thunderbolt at the offending vehicle.

Let it be said that Dust, when exposed to a tremendous surge of electricity, had a tendency to become very volatile indeed. And a bullhead happened to have quite a sizable amount of Dust as fuel, stored in its wings. The resulting Dust explosion reduced the vehicle to bits of flaming scrap; a shockwave from the Dust detonation threw the other bullhead in the air off-course, sending it spiraling into the water when one of its engines faltered and failed.

"Who shall I dispose of next," Valeria growled, rounding on the remaining White Fang on the ground. "How about all of you worthless **joorre**? **YOL...TOOR SHUL!** "

A torrent of white-hot flame surged forth from her mouth, hot enough to turn the concrete of the dock floor to red-hot half-molten glass. The White Fang foot soldiers, caught unaware by surprise, could only scream in terror as they were engulfed in flames, burning them to almost to death. Blake shivered in fright as she listened to them writhe in agony. If it were not for their Aura, she was certain that they would have been instantly turned to ash by that attack.

"Oh COME ON! I just got this cleaned!" Torchwick yelled, putting out the flames on his charred jacket. He had evidently jumped away to one side on seeing the flames, but was not quick enough to avoid all of the damage.

Valeria smirked. "I see that I have missed the criminal scum. Stop right there! **Iiz...SLEN NUS!** "

Too busy with his flaming jacket, Torchwick only saw a glimpse of a wall of pure whiteness before his limbs froze solid.

"Take him away. Blindfold him and muffle his hearing. Burden him, five hundred pounds," Valeria ordered her centurions. Unable to move, Torchwick could only look in fear as the two armoured knights nodded and marched forward, each grabbing one of his arms and hauling him up. One of them undid his cloak and wrapped it unceremoniously around the thief's head, silencing him with a smack to the back of the head when he protested. "J'Bari. I believe that I have seen enough. Order reinforcements on this position, and an immediate orbital scanner sweep on the docks,"

"As you command, Your Majesty,"

"Wait, wait. Reinforcements? A...scanner sweep? Isn't that a bit...much?" Yang said uncertainly, "Couldn't we...just call the police and let them handle it?"

"Miss Xiao Long. If it were simply a random thug from the street attempting to steal my wares, I would not be so concerned," Valeria replied, shaking her head at how oblivious Yang was at how the forces of darkness operated, "But this man, as Miss Schnee has stated, is the culprit of numerous larcenies, all of them connected with Dust. Combine that with the...extraordinary materiel support that this man had, and I believe that this is a premeditated plot by someone else,"

"It does seem likely," Blake commented, eyeing the White Fang that were now out cold on the scorched concrete. The White Fang, after all, did not act blindly. And they most certainly _never_ worked with a human. At least, not the White Fang that she was familiar with.

"Well, considering that the White Fang are involved...yeah, I can see them ordering Torchwick around," Weiss grumbled, "Stupid, lying, cheating, thieving and murdering faunus freaks! What makes them think they have the right to rob us?"

"Weiiiiisss...you know we've been over this, right?" Ruby commented, noting Blake's twitching eyes, "Not all faunus are bad. I mean, look, Blake's alright. Right?"

Weiss noted that Yang was punching her palm not-so-subtly, and decided that perhaps apologising was the better course of action. After all, one did _not_ want to get on the wrong side of an angry Yang Xiao Long; and the only thing that she was more protective of than her sister was Blake. "Right. Sorry, Blake. It's...a difficult habit to stop,"

The raven-haired cat faunus took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "Alright. As long as you're actually trying, Weiss. But who would need to steal this much Dust anyway? Two fully packed shipping containers of it? That's enough to outfit a small army for a month!"

"If one desires peace, one prepares for war," Valeria murmured, recalling a tract from a book the Earth-humans had lent to her at one point, "Outfitting an army is just a means to an end. There is no reason to prepare for war if one desires peace, as all the kingdoms are currently in a state of peace. Which means that whoever our third party is, their motives at the moment are unknowable with our current level of available intelligence,"

"Right. And couple that with the amount of Dust stolen from previous months..."

"That is a very disturbing thought indeed, Miss Schnee. Now, considering that this shipment was meant to be secretly delivered directly from the Schnee Dust Company warehouses, I would suggest that your father check the backgrounds of all those involved in this shipment. Clearly, this attack was orchestrated with full knowledge of when the shipment would arrive. It is difficult to otherwise explain the arrival of nearly two dozen armed thugs and three units of aircraft to intercept a shipment that has arrived mere hours ago. There must be someone leaking information from inside,"

"Hmm. That's a good point..." Weiss muttered. She then heard a loud smack from behind her, and a pained whine from a certain bound-up criminal. "Speaking of which, what's going to happen to _him_?"

Valeria flashed her a predatory grin. "Ah. For criminal scum of _his_ magnitude, let us say that...we have...special procedures. A certain...madhouse...should be able to deal with him,"

* * *

"Uh...Adam?"

"Don't bother. We don't have enough people to rescue that human slimeball," Adam grunted, pushing aside the lieutenant, "Besides, didn't you see? She's calling for backup. Which means that the docks will be swarming with police and soldiers soon,"

"What about...you know...?"

"Oh, you mean Blake? I see that my love has gathered...allies to her cause. It doesn't matter. I'll get my way when the time comes,"

"...Understood. I'll call for some transport to get us out of here," the lieutenant said after a brief pause, tapping in a number on his scroll.

Still, a bit of him was wondering exactly _what_ that woman was. Faunus typically only exhibited a tail or a pair of animal ears as their only differences to humans; that woman – and her bodyguard, judging by the smaller cat-woman's defensive behaviour around her – were both almost entirely feline, with only their upright walking stance being the only similarity to humans. He would have to gather some information on these new arrivals before acting.

After all, if the humans discriminated against faunus solely on the presence of one or two animal traits, surely a person that was almost wholly animal would be even more discriminated against. Perhaps this was a new ally he could obtain.

* * *

A/N

So, we're now moving into Volume 2 territory. Torchwick got arrested early; let us see what the Madgod has in store for his...'information extraction therapy'.

Note that the tone of this story's humour may shift in the future. While it is light-hearted in keeping with Volume 1's whimsical content for most part, Volumes 2 and 3 are beginning to go into the darker side of the plot, and will thus reflect this.


	16. 15 - Gone Phishing

The next thing Roman Torchwick saw when he awoke – and had the infernal cloak of a blindfold removed from over his eyes – was that he was no longer in Remnant. The all-too-bright sky, filled with a literal river of lilac-coloured stars, was an indication. That, and the fact that there was no moon at all in the sky, as far as he could see.

"Where in the bloody hell am I now?" he muttered, attempting to stand up. A clank of metal came from below him, and he felt something hard and cold tug against his bare ankles. It was only when he looked down that the master thief noticed the one thing that every criminal detested: a heavy, solid steel shackle around his ankle.

One that apparently had neither a lock nor a holding pin, as an added bonus. It appeared to have been _welded_ closed somehow, despite being tightly pressed against his bare skin. Looking around, he noticed that he was sitting down on a rather ornate wooden chair in front of a lavishly-decorated table.

A table that was outside. On grass. Neatly trimmed, but it was still grass. Sparkling gold candelabras stood on top of a two-colour tablecloth of darkest inky black and a lurid violet, shedding light on the seven other people seated in front of him.

The two cat-women that he had seen before at the docks. Except the shorter one wasn't in armour, but in a voluminous mauve dress of silk. Neo would _kill_ to have clothes like that. The taller, regal one was dressed in robes of purple and gold, trimmed with the finest, densest white fur that he had ever seen; that crown of hers was still the same as it had been on the docks; shiny, golden and with a ruby that he wished was in his pocket and not on a crown.

"Hey, looks like Torchwick's awake," he heard an all-too-familiar voice say loudly. Goldilocks.

On either side of the table, closer to himself, there were the four weird wannabe huntresses from Beacon Academy. They were all dressed up, much like the short cat was; silk dresses, though in their usual colours. Red was in red; the Schnee bitch was in white, the cat was in black, and Goldilocks was in gold. What was this, some kind of dinner party?

"OF COURSE IT'S A DAMN DINNER PARTY!" roared the person at the head of the table, waving a large, jewel-crusted golden tankard around, sloshing some wine out of it.

Roman froze in shock. It was a spitting image of the taller, regal cat; except this one...she looked...healthier, somehow, and dressed in the most ridiculous patchwork of purple, gold and black that he had ever seen. And somehow, this cat was able to tell what he was thinking.

"How rude of you as a guest! Of course I need to be able to tell what my guests want. Because it's precisely what I want!" she cackled madly.

"Great, so the cat can read minds," drawled Torchwick sarcastically, rolling his eyes, "Where the hell is this, anyway? Doesn't look like any part of Remnant to me,"

"So you can think! Good. Very good. Except for the fact that I'm not a cat. Cats can't think. Not very well, anyway. I'm a khajiit, you fool! Speaking of which, I need a fool. A court jester. You look like you'll fit the bill just fine,"

He choked back a response in disbelief. Him, a master thief, working as a _clown_ , for this insane cat?

"I can think of better ways to spend my time, thanks. And what sort of dinner party is this anyway?"

"One that you crashed when you made a mess of my daughter's trip. That wasn't very nice of you, was it? Buuuut, thankfully, my daughter is nicer than you think. She asked for ME to take care of you! Take good care of you. Special care, as she asked. And what sort of mother would I be, if I simply ignored her? Noooope. Not happening! You're MY guest now,"

"What sort of guest gets chained up, anyway?" Torchwick grumbled, rattling the shackle around his ankles to prove his point.

"One that absolutely must stay to enjoy the best of what I have to offer! I'm getting hungry, now, you know. Waiting for you to wake up. And I think these other young ones are, too. So, how about we get started!"

The strange cat-woman snapped her fingers, and the table in front of him immediately groaned under the weight of an incredible spread of dishes. Roast chickens, ducks and even an entire roast pig materialised out of nowhere, lathered in the most divine-smelling sauces that he had ever smelled. Silver tureens of thick, glossy gravy perched above colossal plates of flawlessly-arranged carved vegetables, and mountains of all manner of spicy sausages smoked on heated plates beside them.

"Well, what are you all waiting for? Dig in! Unless you want a shovel to dig in with, of course. But that wouldn't be very refined at all, would it?"

Golden plates and cutlery appeared in front of everyone, himself included. Raising an eyebrow questioningly, he noticed that everyone seemed to be devouring the food. Except for the tall cat, who was crushing what looked like Dust crystals over goblets of wine and drinking them.

"Ruby, would you care to sample some of these roasts? They are absolutely divine," the Schnee bitch spoke, in what had to be the most atrociously contrived rich-person voice as she carved a slice out of the nearest ham.

"Why, thank you, Weiss dearie. I should looooove to sample some," little Red responded, in an equally cringe-worthy impression of refinement. At least Schnee had the experience to sound mildly as though she had put in an effort.

The cat faunus was now feeding Goldilocks with her own fork, and the short cat was demolishing a duck on her own, lifting up the entire bird onto her plate and just chomping on it without caring for cutlery. Even the patchwork cat was enjoying the food and drink, popping sausages into her mouth and downing goblet after goblet of alcohol.

He looked carefully at the things that they were eating, thinking that maybe there was something in them; it wouldn't have been the first time that people had tried interrogating him with truth serum in food or drink. But every plate had been sampled so far, and every seemingly endless jug of wine had been drunk from, without any change in apparent behaviour. His stomach rumbled, betraying his hunger. It had been quite some time since he had last eaten, considering that he had spent most of the day planning for the attack on the port, after all. And the food in front of him was supremely tempting.

So he simply shrugged and picked up the fork and knife in front of himself and picked at a few cuts of already-carved ham in front of Red. But the Schnee had the carving knife, and when she saw him take the ham from the plate, she immediately tilted her head in disapproval.

"How rude! That was meant for Ruby," she cried out in pompous annoyance.

"Well then, Weiss, do be so kind as to carve some more, would you? A bad host is already bad," chuckled the patchwork cat, "But you know what is worse? A bad guest! Nobody likes bad guests. Especially at my table! Guests will help guests serve themselves, if they can't do it. So what do you say, hmm?"

Hesitating for a moment, the Schnee forced a smile to her lips as she replied, "Of course, Miss. A guest should always be treated as such. I shall carve some more for our esteemed guest,"

"Ooh, I'll pour out the drinks!" Red cheerfully added, pouring out some wine into his glass.

Torchwick had to hold back a smirk. This was a field day; how the high and mighty Schnee got bossed around by a _cat_! This was comedy gold. Add that to how Red was now pouring out wine for him, and he had to be wondering if he was just dreaming. But he had never had such a vivid dream before, that much was for certain. If only all his dreams were like this.

He speared a piece of ham, sniffing it. The mouthwatering aroma of honey and spices drifted to his nose; tantalising, tempting, and utterly, sinfully delicious. He closed his eyes and bit down on it, expecting to savour perfection; but instead, his teeth collided with hard, cold metal.

His eyes flew open. The ham was still on his plate; his fork, however, was empty, and gripped tightly between his teeth. Frowning, he picked up the ham again with his fork, finding resistance as expected. He lifted it up, and made sure that it was still there, before biting down on it.

Only for his teeth to bite on metal once more.

"Man, I'm stuffed," he heard Goldilocks huff, patting her stomach, "Thanks, kittycat. Now, how about I feed you?"

"Hm. I don't have any objections to that idea,"

"Then open wiiiiide!" Goldilocks said brightly, lathering a piece of fried fish in gravy and then feeding it to the cat faunus. Her eyes closed in utter ecstasy as she devoured it, only opening it to watch for the next morsel that was inbound.

Growling quietly in frustration, Torchwick picked up yet another piece of ham, and tried to eat it, with the same result. "Oh come on. Can't a man eat some great food for once?"

"Oooh, is something wrong, my guest?" the patchwork cat purred, smirking, "Why, you haven't eaten a single morsel! This is not right. Not at all. Not in a party! And certainly not at a feast. Especially _MY_ feast! Is something wrong with the food?"

"It disappears when I try to eat it!" he shouted in frustration, picking up another piece of ham and demonstrating it. If he wasn't dreaming, he swore that the fork flashed faintly as he did so, but he waved it off as a figment of his imagination. The touch and smell of it was real enough. This had to be real.

"Disappearing? Like it's not real? Of course it's real, silly. After all, if it were not," the Schnee said in a sing-song voice, "I wouldn't be able to feed my dolt here to my heart's content,"

"Mmmph-hm! It's delicious. You really should try some,"

Now he was _really_ questioning whether this was real or a dream. The Schnee girl was actually talking to _him_. A thief. Not just any thief; the one and only master thief who had stolen immeasurable amounts of Dust from SDC trains, shops, trucks and depots. By all rights, she should be trying to dig his brains out with that fork of hers, given how she was sitting right next to him.

"Do you actually need _someone_ to feed you, hm?" asked the patchwork cat sweetly.

Roman took a look around; the ones that seemed to be getting anything into themselves in the way of food were those that weren't using cutlery themselves. The short cat was literally just shoving her face into the food; the cat faunus was feeding (and had been fed) by Goldilocks; Schnee was feeding Red from her own fork. Maybe this was just one of the weird rules of whatever dream world he was in.

Shrugging, he said, "Sure, why not. At least then I can't possibly bite metal,"

In a puff of purple smoke, the patchwork cat was instantly at his side, with a plate of gravy-coated ham in her hand and a fork in the other. "Well then! As a good host, I can simply oblige. Wouldn't want my name dragged through the mud, would we, hm? Wait, scratch that, there isn't even mud here! Maybe I should make some,"

"Errh...no thanks. Let's just have some food,"

"Right you are! Here it is!"

And thus Torchwick had his first bite of the night, and it did not fail to deliver. It was divinity in a mouthful; perfection in a morsel, a cadence of epic flavours of unrivalled proportions, wrapped up in a single, faintly greenish-glowing bite.

This had to be a dream. Food couldn't possibly taste that good. Food couldn't possibly glow, either. And there couldn't possibly be a weird cat that was thinking of taking a master thief in as a clown. Not that cats could talk or pay him, in any case.

"Hmm, how about we make this a little more interesting, then? Let's play a game. I ask a question, and I feed you when you answer,"

He hesitated, but then shrugged his worries off when a little voice in his head whispered to him that everything was okay. It was a dream, right? What could possibly go wrong?

* * *

"You know, Aunt Sheogorath, I'm not sure whether I should be impressed or be very, very scared of how you got that information," Weiss murmured, a smug smile on her face as she stepped through the portal back to Team RWBY's dorm room back in Beacon Academy, "That's quite a sizable amount of information you extracted from Torchwick. Even my sister, Winter, couldn't do it back in Atlas,"

Ruby, Yang and Blake walked through next, patting their bulging bellies in satisfaction, "Wow, way to blow the mood, Weiss. You sure aren't _Weiss_ about when you start talking about serious stuff," Yang joked, earning her a slap on the back of the head from an irate Weiss, "Ow! Watch the hair, Snow Angel!"

"Only my dolt has the right to call me that. You, on the other hand...you do not have that privilege,"

" _Your_ dolt? Right, I'll pretend I didn't hear that. Anyway, thanks for the epic meal, Auntie Sheo! That really blows everything else out of the water. Even the cooks back in the Imperial City couldn't pull that off. Uh, no offence, Archmage,"

"None taken, Miss Xiao Long. I suspect that my cooks have been long out of touch. Given how my mother is more...gluttonous, and I am incapable of eating proper food, I do believe that they have much, _much_ more practice,"

"Oh, is THAT what you think of me, daughter? A fat, lazy khajiit? Why, I'll have you know that I haven't put on any weight at all! Why, I can simply lose weight by _thinking_ about it,"

"Indeed, mother. You were never one for exercise, though I suppose being a Daedric Prince has its perks when it comes to maintaining a constant form. Regardless, Team RWBY, we could not have extracted this information without your assistance. Your cooperation – and acting skills, I might add – were exemplary. Well done,"

"Yes! I haven't seen such insanely convincing acting in such a long time. And I know how to make even SKELETONS dance!" Ra'shamarra said, an amused glint in her eyes, "Wait, wait. It might be because you weren't acting at all! You were enjoying yourselves at a feast, after all. Is that right? That has to be right. Because I know I'm right. And I'm ALWAYS right!"

"Yep. I definitely enjoyed feeding kittycat here," Yang chuckled, nuzzling into Blake's shoulder.

"Ugh. Don't get me started on carving a ham for _Roman Torchwick_ , of all people," grumbled Weiss, pressing a palm into her face, "That must be one of the most infuriating moments that I've ever experienced. I mean, me, a Schnee carving food for a thief? Torchwick, no less? That's just absurd,"

"At least you got through it without blowing up, Weissy! Not like last time,"

"Hey! You were the one that _sneezed_ , remember?"

"Regardless, I would like to congratulate you all on a mission well done on the first day back to Beacon," Valeria spoke, nodding appreciatively to Team RWBY, her mother and J'Bari, "The shipment of Dust intended for my storehouses is secured onboard the _Wrath of Talos;_ a criminal mastermind has been apprehended by your actions, and you have even assisted in extracting valuable intelligence from him. Exceptional,"

All of the students stood up slightly taller, proud that their notoriously strict and stern teacher had only words of glowing praise for them. "Wait," Weiss gasped, her eyes lighting up greedily, "Does this mean that we will get additional marks?"

Valeria sighed in disapproval. "I shall...consider it, Miss Schnee,"

"YES!" she cheered loudly, punching the air.

"Wait," Ruby asked, remembering that there was still one more person remaining in the Shivering Isles, "What's going to happen to Torchwick? I mean, I know he's a bad guy, but..."

"Oh, you don't need to worry about that, my dear," Ra'shamarra giggled, a sly grin on her face, "Auntie Sheogorath looks after her guests! He will not be killed while in my realm. But...ah, it may be...uncomfortable for him,"

"Why's that?" Ruby asked innocently, curious about what sort of punishment Ra'shamarra had in mind. The elder khajiit's grin only grew wider.

"Let's just say that I _am_ actually after a court jester. One that can actually wear proper clothing! After all, patchwork is oh-so-magnificent, don't you think?"

* * *

A/N:

Reverse torture! It works. Or maybe only if you're as unhinged as the Daedric Prince of Madness, which therefore convinces your target that THEY are dreaming.

As for Adam, well, we'll have to wait and see, won't we? :D

Bundeswehr: Yes, Grimm do not have a soul as per RWBY lore. But they have less experience in direct manipulation of soul energy barring their own Aura; Atlas has just attempted to bind a soul to mechanical constructs, while Nirn has been doing this for quite some time. My explanation is in the chapter after that, I think. To reconcile the differences, let us assume some things:

1\. By Remnant standards, the presence of Aura is considered an indication of the presence of a soul, and vice versa. A lack of a soul means no Aura, and Grimm do NOT have Aura. By this definition, Grimm DO NOT have a soul as they are incapable of generating Aura.

2\. By Nirnian standards, anything that is capable of independent thought and autonomous movement - whether constrained by certain rules or otherwise - is driven by a soul (captured, as per Dwemeri automata or inborn). By this definition, Grimm DO have a soul as they are capable of independent thought and autonomous movement.

3\. By Nirnian standards, souls come in different magnitudes, which determines just how much energy they contain, which is often unrelated to the physical strength of the creature or construct in question. Aura, being a projection of the soul, represents the outward projection of the contained energy in the soul. By this definition, the strength of an Aura is determined by the energy contained in a soul. A soul that contains zero energy is still a soul, but does not produce any Aura. This would satisfy both 1. and 2.


	17. 16 - Whipped

"Ah. Professor Ozpin," Valeria spoke, giving a slight nod as she entered his office, "And it is a...pleasure...to meet you again, General Ironwood,"

"Save it, Valeria," he replied brusquely, his eyes narrowing. An Atlesian cruiser drifted past the window behind Ozpin, along with at least three others following closely behind it. The significance of this was not lost on Valeria; this was a show of power projection, nothing else. Unfortunately for him, it would take more than three small frigate-analogues to intimidate her. "Alright, Ozpin. What's the big issue that you found that needs me to come down all the way from Atlas, right at this moment?"

"I think it's probably better to let Archmage Septim explain," he answered, leaning back in his chair and taking a sip from his mug.

"Very well. I believe that you are aware of a certain felon called Roman Torchwick?"

Ironwood raised an eyebrow. "Yes. He has avoided capture in Atlas and Vale for several months now. What about him?"

Valeria reached inside her robes and pulled out her scroll. Opening it up, she placed it down on the table in front of them. "He has made an attempt on a Dust shipment bound for Nirn. Two shipping containers' worth, filled with five tons of high-grade, crystalline Dust each,"

"And now they're missing?" sighed Ironwood exasperatedly. While a part of him wanted to laugh at the Empress' expense for humiliating him back in Atlas, that amount of Dust was not trivial. That was enough weapons-grade Dust to supply the Atlas military for at least a week.

Valeria gave both of them a crooked smile. "No," she chuckled, "Not a single crystal of Dust was lost. Two Bullheads belonging to Torchwick have been destroyed, and a third is in Vale law enforcement custody. You may also find thirty White Fang prisoners in Vale Police Department's prisons, as they have been aiding and abetting a known criminal in the crime of grand larceny,"

"Well, that's good news at least. More locked up White Fang means less threats to us. What about Torchwick?"

"Hmm...regarding that matter," Valeria said, her smile widening, "The answer lies within my scroll. Have a read, if you please,"

Curious, Ironwood picked up Valeria's scroll and began to read through the document she had open. Ozpin opened up his own scroll, duplicating whatever Ironwood was reading on his own. Both men's eyes widened in surprise as they began to read page after page of the information contained within. "Where," the general breathed, "Where did you get all of this? All these plans...these locations. These descriptions of past robberies and even where all the Dust is headed..."

"Roman Torchwick," she answered simply, "Let us say that...we have ways of extracting information. Inside that document is every piece of information that we have been able to obtain from him,"

"You captured Torchwick?" Ironwood said loudly, standing up, "Where is he now? That man cannot be permitted to run free!"

Knowing the ultimate fate that Torchwick had at the hands of her mother, Valeria gave Ironwood an amused smirk. "Please trust myself that the man is...in a secure location. He will never walk upon Remnant ever again,"

"You...killed him?" Ozpin murmured, his fingers tightening around his mug's handle. That seemed to be the most likely answer, given how evasive Valeria seemed to be at the moment.

"No, nothing of the sort. You see, someone rather close to myself has found a use for him. Keep reading the document until you have reached the very bottom. You will both owe me fifty lien if either of you laugh for but a second. Even I could not hold back when I had first seen what had been done to the man,"

Raising an eyebrow, Ironwood and Ozpin both flicked their fingers to scroll all the way down to the bottom of the document – and then promptly burst out laughing at the image at the bottom.

There, in a gilded metal cage, was Torchwick. Clad in the most ridiculous patchwork of rainbow colours that could only be loosely described as a jester's motley and tights. His usual bowler hat had several bits of colourful cloth stitched to it, with brass bells attached to the end of each piece. Behind him in the picture, though, was another khajiit that looked like a healthier clone of Valeria, pulling a comical face at the camera at the time that the picture was taken.

"Let us say that Mr. Torchwick is...no longer in this world,"

* * *

"Hey, J'Bari, what's that?" Yang asked curiously, watching her stumble about with a heavy steel box that she was carrying into Team RWBY's room. It was stamped with a golden Imperial Dragon emblem on its front, and if Yang wasn't mistaken, the entire thing was covered in hundreds of tiny, tiny explosive runes; and the lid was locked by no less than seven padlocks, and dozens of magickal sealing glyphs.

"Orbital strike beacons," she said grimly, huffing as she dropped the crate with a loud crash at the foot of Weiss' bunk, "Her Majesty suggests that it might be safer to have it with students that she can trust, rather than leaving it inside her office,"

Yang's jaw dropped. "Wait, wait, wait. What did you just say?" she choked out, gawking, " _Orbital strike beacons_? What are _those_? Why do you even need it under so much protection?"

J'Bari opened her mouth to answer, but then closed it, frowning. There was simply only so many ways one could sugar coat the truly destructive nature of these devices. "This one thinks...that the easiest way to think of it is that these are tracking devices. These will allow Her Majesty's ship to track a target with its main gun, and shoot at it from the Void. This one will not lie; the destruction caused by a single shot can be...overwhelming. An entire city could be laid to waste with a partially charged shot,"

"Yeah, I can kind of see that. That ship's got a really, really big gun," murmured Yang, "Okay, let's just...you know, put it somewhere safe. I thought we had Torchwick locked up, though, so that should throw the White Fang off for some time, right? Do we really need that much firepower right now?"

J'Bari pressed a green, glowing rune on the side of the crate, and the entire thing simply vanished from sight. There was only a slight distortion in the air around its outline that gave its true location away.

"This one thinks that it is better to be safe than sorry. This crate should be secure now, from visual observation at least. As for firepower, this one doesn't know. Her Majesty has plans, but this one is not privy to them,"

"Well, that's as safe as safe gets, I guess. And I'm kinda curious about what she's got for us. Anyway, come on, we've got combat class today! You aren't skipping again, are you?"

* * *

The class was fuller than it usually was. Exchange students from other academies filled up what seats were usually empty, meaning that the amphitheatre was full to the brim. J'Bari caught quite a few odd – and rarely, somewhat revolted – looks from the exchange students, more frequently among those from Atlas.

"This one is curious. Is there something on this one's face?" J'Bari sighed, thoroughly vexed. Passing by a group of staring exchange students started to get a little old after the first twelve or so times. Especially after hearing them start to whisper among each other about a 'weird new cat faunus', or something along those lines.

"No, no! You look fine, J'Bari," Ruby said quickly, noticing the khajiit's discomfort, "It's just that...well, you're...your kind isn't exactly common around here. I mean, I don't think any of the other students have seen you or Archmage Septim at all. It's their first proper day in Beacon, after all,"

"This one supposes that is true. Still, this one would appreciate a bit more privacy. Perhaps invisibility would be in order, but that would draw even more attention when this one's pen starts to move on its own,"

When she noticed Yang's widening smile, she sighed and shook her head. "This one has just given Yang another idea for a prank, hasn't she?"

Whatever talk the group may have had was immediately silenced when Professor Goodwitch walked into the middle of the amphitheatre. "Students of Beacon Academy, and all the exchange students. Be seated,"

When the rest of the chatter in the room died down, Goodwitch waved her riding crop and a holographic display flickered to life above the amphitheatre. "Welcome to combat class. If any of you have not heard, I am Professor Goodwitch, the instructor for this class. Now, seeing as we are approaching the date of the Vytal Festival, perhaps this is a good time to revise combat against other huntsmen and huntresses. In the festival, as a competitor must continue no matter the condition of their teammates, it is important that we learn how to fight in an uneven context. For this, I will need a team, and a single member of another team. Do we have any volunteers for the single combatant?"

Faces turned as teammates glanced uncertainly at one another. Most shook their heads slowly, not wanting to be the one picked to fight four other huntsmen or huntresses-in-training.

"Very well, if nobody wants to volunteer, I will randomly select a person," Professor Goodwitch spoke, flicking her riding crop again.

And so it was that several random groups fought. Most of the students could not hold their own against the combined might of four other huntresses or huntsmen, falling rather quickly. Others fared slightly better; depending on how one looked at it, Jaune Arc fared rather well against another team from Atlas. After all, his vast reserves of Aura kept him in the fight for a _very_ long time, even if he could not dish out as much pain as he could soak up.

Then came the time for Pyrrha to go up against another team. The redhead was more than ready to fight anyone – or any team – that came down to the amphitheatre. After all, she did not earn the title of 'Invincible Girl' for nothing. She confidently stood in the middle, crossing her arms and smiling as she waited for the next team to be selected.

And then came the shock. The team display only indicated a single opponent.

"...Well, okay then. I suppose if she is registered as a team of her own, that is what it is," Professor Goodwitch muttered under her breath. "Would Miss J'Bari please come down to the stage?"

"This one is happy to do so," purred J'Bari, turning on her heel and vanishing in a puff of purple smoke. She reappeared moments later beside Pyrrha to the shocked gasps of every exchange student in the room, before giving her a friendly wave and a nod.

"Miss J'Bari, I have noticed that you...are not carrying a weapon. Do you need to go back to your locker and get one?" asked Professor Goodwitch, noting that J'Bari didn't have her usual shortsword strapped to her leg. The khajiit in question flinched and clapped a hand against her thigh, finding the weapon missing.

"This one must have left it in her dorms. But this one should be fine without it," J'Bari replied, smiling.

Goodwitch gave her a strange look. It was well known among the staff that the khajiit could wield arcane arts rather well, but this was a sparring match. A weapon was almost always necessary. After all, how could one defend themselves without a weapon?

"Well, if you are certain. This is a standard sparring match, after all. Now, you are aware of the rules. Bringing your opponent down to twenty percent of their maximum Aura is enough to be considered a victory. Please make your way to the opposite ends of the arena, so we can begin,"

"This one wishes you good luck, Pyrrha,"

"Thanks, J'Bari. Let's have a good sparring match,"

The khajiit calmly walked over to the other end of the ring, awaiting Professor Goodwitch to give them the signal to start the bout. Pyrrha, on the other hand, was quite uncertain about how this would go. It was well known that usually J'Bari would skip combat class to perform some task or another by either Professor Ozpin or Valeria, and as a result she was never seen in combat class after the first lesson that she had. Nobody had seen her actively spar before; at least, with another student.

"Begin!"

J'Bari held up her both her hands; a two-metre long ethereal greatsword fell neatly into her right hand, while from her left hand flowed tendrils of bluish-white icy flame, occasionally sending a small spark of lightning to the ground. Students gasped in awe as she lashed out with her whip, sending a wall of intense blue flames streaking towards Pyrrha.

Unfazed, Pyrrha vaulted over the flames, letting the magickal attack crash harmlessly against the safety barriers of the arena. Four blazing fireballs soared her way, which she barely blocked with her shield. The metal faintly glowed blue as it was struck by the flames and dispersed them; she would have to thank Ruby for enchanting Akouo with magic resistance later. The scorching heat still stung, but at least she was not set ablaze.

"This one is impressed. Not many stand their ground against flames," purred J'Bari with a smile on her face, causing Pyrrha to grin back at her friend. The khajiit's flame whip vanished, and she motioned for Pyrrha to come at her.

Excited by the furious start of the bout, Pyrrha charged at J'Bari, raising her spear to strike. The khajiit clenched her free hand in response; a wall of frost burst forth in front of her face and shattered, coating the floor in a slippery slick. Pyrrha, surprised, tripped on the ice and started sliding towards J'Bari, who now had her greatsword raised to strike with both hands. Undeterred, the three-time Mistral tournament champion switched Milo to its rifle configuration, firing off several shots and forcing J'Bari to parry them instead of striking.

A few bullets struck her, one glancing off her cheek and leaving a small gash, while the others bounced harmlessly off her armour. Her Aura had been activated, but it was rather weak; the single bullet had shaved a good third of her Aura reserves away.

"Excellent. Excellent!" J'Bari exclaimed, her tail flicking rapidly in excitement. She whirled around and teleported to the other side of the room. Brandishing the ethereal greatsword in one hand and a flame whip in the other, she roared and charged towards Pyrrha.

"What the-" the girl cried out, noticing J'Bari doing the unthinkable. Instead of striking with the sword, the khajiit had reared back and _hurled_ the weapon at her at full sprint. With barely a split second to react, she raised Akouo and barely blocked the ethereal blade, which sent her skidding back several metres by the force of the impact. The blade itself shattered into dozens of ethereal fragments, each one exploding into hundreds of minuscule bits of shrapnel.

"It didn't react to my Semblance," Pyrrha gasped quietly, realising that she couldn't simply slow down the weapon, much less deflect it. It wasn't made of steel, after all. But there was little time to think about the implications of this, as the khajiit was already upon her, one icy lash already racing upwards from the floor towards her crotch.

Every person in the room winced as they realised what was about to happen.

Stars filled Pyrrha's sight as a world of pain engulfed her mind entirely. Dust, she barely even registered being lifted a good foot or two off the ground by the force of the blow. She collapsed to the ground, clutching her nether regions with both hands while howling in agony. If the greatsword was ethereal, the icy whip was _definitely_ solid enough to cause pain. A lot of pain, it seemed, when directed to the right parts.

"This one forfeits," J'Bari spoke, her ears flattened against her skull in shame, "There is no honour in winning like this,"

Pyrrha's Aura indicator, while it was still most definitely in the green, did not show the blistering pain that she was in. Murmurs began to fill the hall as they watched the (previously) Invincible Girl brought down to her knees – and was now curled up and groaning in a fetal position on the ground, being tended to by her opponent.

And thus from that day on, the Invincible Girl was no longer invincible. But at least she didn't have a...less desirable nickname, unlike a certain khajiit that was her opponent.

* * *

"So, what's this that I'm hearing about a...'Dominatrix'?"

"This one asks you to kindly shut up," J'Bari muttered quietly, her ears flicking in annoyance. "There are...innocent younglings here,"

True, she preferred to use elemental whips in combat. But it was more for the purposes of being rather tricky to block with any shield or weapon, rather than...inducing ungodly pain. Well, maybe that was part of the reason, the khajiit thought to herself, blushing underneath her fur.

"What's a dominatrix?" Ruby asked innocently, "Is it some kind of toy?"

"Ruby," Yang said stiffly, not believing what her sister just said, "Please don't ask. Just...go to the cafeteria and grab some cookies for yourself. Weiss, can you cover for me for this week?"

"Really? Yay!" Ruby cheered, snatching up the twenty-lien chip that Weiss slid to her, "Thanks, Weissy!"

"This one is curious. Is Pyrrha alright?"

"Yeah, she'll be fine. She still can't walk straight, but she'll be okay by the time the dance comes around. You really got her good though. That was one really, really hard hit. Hey, isn't it another combat class tomorrow? Are you...coming to that one too?"

J'Bari mulled it over, tilting her head to one side. "This one...thinks that is...not impossible. Perhaps,"

* * *

Meanwhile, in another dorm in the school...

"You can't do this to me," gasped a boy with steel-grey hair. His face had paled to an ashen white, and his jaw hung slack as he cowered by the door with one hand on the handle. "I'm not fighting... _her_...just to learn about what the hell that Semblance is!"

When the raven-haired woman in front of him only frowned further, he turned to his mint-haired companion. "Come on, Emerald. Help me out, here?"

The girl in question looked at Mercury, and then at the raven-haired woman that he called Cinder. "Hm, let me think," Emerald hummed mockingly, "How about...no. There's not enough lien in your pocket to convince me,"

"OH COME ON!"

* * *

A/N:

Yusss, JESTER TORCHWICK! Now with 100% more cowbell. Did I say cowbell? I meant bell.


	18. 17 - Huntress or Hunted?

"Hey, looking good, Blake!" Yang cheerfully said, giving her partner an enthusiastic thumbs-up.

With Torchwick securely locked up in the Shivering Isles, the cat faunus had finally been able to wave away some of her worries. To the point where she was actually capable of thinking about the Beacon Dance night.

Well, not so much think about it as to have everything already decided for her by Weiss and Yang, requiring her to only agree on the plans they had for her and the rest of Team RWBY. Everything from what she was going to wear (which, really, was not difficult, given that she had only one formal dress given by Ra'shamarra), what she was going to have for the dinner; even what they were going to do _after_ the party. Considering the amount of worried thoughts running through her head for the past several months, Blake could only feel gratitude and relief that her teammates were looking out so much for her.

"Hmm, I know I'm hot, but to think that you're actually confirming it by staring? Thanks a lot, kittycat," giggled Yang, causing Blake to flush brightly. Before Blake could reply, however, Yang offered her an arm. "Well, Blake, should we get in and have some fun?"

Blake looked at the offered arm, and then at Yang's smiling face. How could she say no to such enthusiasm and cheerfulness? "Of course," she replied, looping her arm around the blonde's.

When both of them entered the ballroom, they noticed that virtually everyone was already on the dance floor, dancing to the slow, soothing tune that filled the room. Yang gasped at how magnificent Ruby looked. After Weiss had decided to ask Ruby to come to the dance with her, the heiress had taken it upon herself to bring the reaper's style 'up to expectations'. Which, apparently, had paid off.

With a little help from Ra'shamarra, they had managed to grow Ruby's hair to just below her shoulders over a few days. Short enough to be practical, and yet long enough for Weiss to consider it 'properly delicate'. A red-and-black silk ribbon kept it in a loose, flowing cascade down her back, with a healthy shine that would have made even Yang proud. The red dress that she wore had a large red silk rosette attached to the rear of a sash which looped around her waist. She was even wearing heels; six-inch long red heels, with what appeared to be a cork bottle stopper on each stiletto heel to give it slightly more stability.

"Wow. Just wow, Rubes. Never thought I'd see the day my little baby sister all so grown up!" Yang squealed, rushing forward to greet her sister. To her amusement, Ruby's eyes widened and she stumbled about, barely keeping herself up. If it were not for Weiss gracefully striding in and grabbing her arm, she would likely have fallen face-first onto the floor.

"Thanks, Weiss," Ruby sighed, struggling to retain her balance, "How do you even fight in these...stupid lady stilts? Every time I move, I feel like I'm about to fall over!"

"It's not that hard, dolt. Put the heel on the ground first, and then roll your toes forward to level your foot,"

"That's what I've been doing! And it's not working," Ruby whined, pouting, "Can I get out of these and into my boots now?"

"No, not yet, you dolt. You haven't even given me a dance yet!"

"Speaking of a dance," Blake said, interrupting the two, "I thought J'Bari said that she was attending the dance. I don't see her on the dance floor...or anywhere,"

"This one...doesn't like crowds," murmured a familiar voice. A flickering patch of empty space emitted a soft burst of sparks, before a disgruntled khajiit suddenly materialised out of nowhere, holding two glasses of punch. "Especially when there are so many unfamiliar people around,"

"Wow. I guess that makes the two of us," Ruby giggled, "Can I have one of those?"

"Certainly," J'Bari replied, smiling as her tail flicked from side to side, "To the socially awkward, we drink,"

"Yup!" replied Ruby, popping the 'p' as she clinked her glass against J'Bari's.

"Well, as nice as this is, I think I was promised a dance by a certain _someone_ ," Yang said, winking at Blake. "Come on, kittycat, let's enjoy ourselves,"

And so Blake and Yang ventured out onto the dance floor, mingling among the crowd of other couples in the room. Ruby had to be dragged out onto the dance floor by Weiss, still pouting despite dancing with her partner. Now left largely alone, J'Bari walked to the second floor balcony, content to be just watching. She didn't have a dance partner of her own, and neither did she want to dance. After all, it was simply a distraction to her primary mission that night; and considering how full the dance hall was, her work was definitely cut out for her. Observing the movements of hundreds of people simultaneously was not particularly easy.

Surreptitiously, she cast a noise-making rune on the staircase leading up to the second floor. If any student would walk up behind her, she would hear it first. She would simply watch over the entire event, pretending to be a student that was simply drinking a glass of punch while enjoying the music.

The information that Torchwick had given them indicated that there was at least one of his contacts present in Beacon, and that she was arriving under the guise of an exchange student. There was little other information that she had about her target's appearance, however; the criminal was not particularly able to provide any verifiable information by that stage of the interrogation, after unwittingly downing a shot of skooma-spiked greenmote liquor that was on the table. Somehow, a green-haired minx with flaming yellow and red mismatched eyes and a pink umbrella seemed very much impossible to encounter.

Still, that didn't mean that it was all completely untrue. Even in the most insane of madmen, there was always a sliver of truth among that which was imagined. And even now, she had her eyes on two particular people at the moment.

A green-haired girl with blood-red eyes, and a raven-haired girl with a rather bright yellow eye. The other she could not see, as it was covered by a rather dense fringe. Both, however, were behaving rather oddly, as their eyes were watching other students even as they danced.

For several minutes, J'Bari simply kept an eye on what they were doing. They did not make any overt moves to attempt anything, but their eyes still roved over the other guests in the group. Sipping at her nearly empty glass of punch, she decided to stay a few more minutes before refilling. Her patience was rewarded when a third person approached them as they finished their dances and settled down at a table in the far corner, beside a fire exit.

It was the teen with the steel-coloured hair that insisted on sparring with her on the other combat class. Judging by his stiff gait and the way he winced as he sat down, it seemed that her thorough victory over him still caused him quite a lot of pain in the nethers and on his legs. But before she could watch them more closely, she heard the telltale squeak of the noise rune on the staircase; cursing her luck, she slowly turned around, making sure to put up an act of finishing her drink.

"Hey, J'Bari. What are you doing up here?" Ruby asked, approaching the khajiit. Weiss was following closely behind, blushing beet red for some reason or another. "Wait, isn't that...the glass of punch you had from before? You don't normally drink that slowly. What's wrong?"

Her ears twitched in irritation. Sometimes, Ruby could be too inquisitive for her own good. But it had to be said that despite her apparent childishness, there was still a sharp mind behind those silver eyes. Sometimes, at least. "This one has just been...watching the dances," she said.

It wasn't completely a lie, but it wasn't entirely truthful, either. Weiss crossed her arms and frowned, not quite believing her. "J'Bari. You've been with our team for quite some time now, and we can tell when you're behaving oddly. That, and you are always one of the first to leave the cafeteria after eating. It never takes you longer than five minutes to finish eating anything,"

"Khajiit is not telling an untruth," J'Bari sighed, swirling the last dregs of punch in the glass, "Khajiit has been watching the dances. They are very interesting to watch closely,"

"Watching closely from the balcony? I don't think so, J'Bari," snarked Weiss. But as she noticed the khajiit's glare at her, she lowered her voice and added quietly, "You're doing something at the moment, aren't you? Something for...her?"

"Wait...Weiss, are you saying...?" whispered Ruby, finally figuring out what was going on, "J'Bari's...spying on someone? SHE HAS A CRUSH ON SOMEONE?!"

J'Bari facepalmed. These girls were sometimes too inquisitive for their own good – and Ruby could at times be a little dense. But if her mistress could trust them, then she could probably trust them too. At least, out of combat.

"Not here. Follow J'Bari," the khajiit mouthed, thumbing to the glass door leading to the outside balcony. When the other two girls followed her out and she was certain she was not being followed, she cast a silencing sphere over the three of them, "Now we may speak. Yes, khajiit is spying on someone. No, khajiit does not spy on a potential mate. That would be...most unsettling. Khajiit is doing an errand for Her Majesty. This one has information that suggests that there may be infiltrating agents of the enemy present in the ballroom,"

"An enemy? But there are only other students in the ballroom," Ruby murmured.

"Unless the infiltrators are also disguised as students. This one has observed at least three suspicious students in the room, but this one has no solid proof of any wrongdoing," added J'Bari, frowning, "This one will still continue to watch over the whole event. But this dance is not over yet, and a proper guest would be missed if one were to disappear for too long, and that would-"

Another squeak came from inside the dance hall, and J'Bari froze. "Stay still," she whispered, dispelling the silencing sphere and casting a quick invisibility spell over all three of them. They heard a set of soft, nearly inaudible footfalls on the hard tiled floor inside approaching their balcony. A woman strode quickly past their balcony; one with wavy ashen hair reaching down to her mid-back, wearing an elegant black ballroom gown and carrying herself with grace and confidence.

The footsteps then faded away, and they heard the squeak of another balcony door opening somewhere else in the ballroom; and before they knew it, there was a shadowy figure bounding across rooftops, away from the ballroom. J'Bari hissed and dispelled the invisibility field, grabbing the railing and preparing to jump off.

"Wait, J'Bari! What are you doing?" Ruby cried out in alarm, "Shouldn't we notify Miss Septim or something first?"

"This one will have to ask you to do that for her. This one will pursue the infiltrator," hissed J'Bari, "Go! Go now!"

"Weiss, you go. I'll help J'Bari," Ruby ordered her partner, who nodded and sprinted off. Ruby kicked off her shoes and typed into her scroll for her weapons locker. In short order, the device landed on the balcony; the reaper grabbed her scythe and a pair of comfortable, comfortable combat boots.

"Oh, my sweetheart," Ruby gasped, hugging both her scythe and the boots.

"This one is not certain if you are referring to your weapon or your shoes," J'Bari said, scratching her head, "But that doesn't matter right now. We must hurry!"

* * *

The infiltrator moved much, much more quickly over the rooftops than they did on the ground; but eventually, Ruby and J'Bari found the telltale trail of destruction that she left behind. A whole lot of Atlas soldiers near the Vale CCTS tower, all crumpled on the ground.

"They're still alive," Ruby gasped in relief, checking one of the fallen soldiers. The man's breathing was laboured, and he was unconscious, but he was still alive.

"Then you will stay here and guard the entrance to this tower until J'Bari comes out again. Watch out for any suspicious activity," ordered J'Bari, conjuring a pair of ethereal greatswords, "This one will deal with the infiltrator,"

"But..." retorted Ruby, though she recoiled in fear when J'Bari fixed her with a glare devoid of pity or mercy.

"There is no room for hesitation or error. This is a tower containing long-range communications equipment. The only one in Vale, and one that will cause your entire world's communications network to fail, should it fall. Yes, this one has completed her research," hissed the khajiit, "Now do as this one says. Please. This one must make sure the tower is safe, and this one also requires that no other infiltrators make it in. This one cannot be in two places at once,"

"Alright, alright. Fine, I'll stay put," Ruby huffed, shouldering Crescent Rose.

"Good. This one should return soon. Remain safe,"

Inside the tower, J'Bari noticed that there were several other fallen soldiers in the entry hall of the CCTS tower. All of them appeared to be unconscious, given how their chests were still rising and falling slowly; a benefit given by the presence of Aura in this world, of course, as nearly-lethal strikes would just render them unconscious. A flicker of movement caught her eye; the indicator above the elevator on the far side was rapidly ticking up, rapidly ascending the floors.

"Found you," she muttered under her breath, tapping the elevator button to go up.

Minutes flew past as the elevator took its sweet time coming back down to the ground floor. When it did, however, J'Bari wasted no time in rushing in and punching in the key for the top floor.

"If they built a tower this tall, khajiit does not understand why they could not have elevators that move faster," she grumbled. Despite not stopping at any other floors, the elevator _still_ took an age and a half to move all the way to the top floor. When the elevator finally arrived at the top floor with a soft _ding_ , she swore that never had she heard a sweeter sound.

But when the door opened, there was not a single soul to be seen anywhere inside the room. Instead, every computer console in the room was activated, and the operator's console in the middle of the room was showing only a single symbol.

A black queen chess piece.

"How...interesting," J'Bari muttered, approaching the console.

Her ears flicked as she heard near-silent footsteps approaching from her right. Instinctively, she lashed out with one greatsword, swinging where a person's neck would have been if they had been standing up. But her sword only cut the wind, for her intended target had crouched quite low to the ground, two blades seemingly forged of black glass in her hands.

The female infiltrator was masked and clad in a black bodysuit, but she was certain that she had seen that same ashen hair somewhere earlier. Without so much as a grunt, the infiltrator let loose a flurry of deadly strikes with her blades; so fast that J'Bari was forced to back away as she parried the blows with difficulty. One strike, however, passed far below her rapidly weakening guard, and her eyes widened as the point of the blade raced up towards her unarmoured ribs-

She hissed in agony as stars filled her vision. The blade ripped straight through her as though it were merely tearing through paper, the point emerging clean through her back. She slammed her other greatsword's pommel into the woman, forcing her to drop the other blade as she tried to block the powerful blow and sending her sliding back several metres and into a console.

With a snarl of rage, J'Bari hurled both of her swords, willing them to shatter mid-flight into hundreds of razor-sharp fragments. The other woman dodged and weaved under the deadly storm of projectiles, but even her fluid movements could not stop her from taking a good portion of them from peppering her arms.

"Stay...still...you filthy skeever!" wheezed J'Bari, throwing a thunderbolt across the room, which struck a table. Another one missed her target by less than an inch, before smashing into the windows on the far side and causing three glass panels to shatter. She was vaguely aware of the faint dripping of blood on the floor; the coppery taste of blood started to fill her mouth, and her head was starting to pound from her inability to draw a deep breath. She had to finish this quickly before she would fall to blood loss.

The infiltrator, this time, had flash-forged another set of glass blades from what seemed to be parts of her suit, and was rapidly rushing towards the khajiit. Unfazed, and this time aware of where her target actually was, J'Bari conjured a pair of ice whips and lashed out, forcing the elemental lash to bloom into a wall of icy blades just as it was about to strike. Her opponent hesitated and attempted to parry the whip; but the magickal tendrils simply curled around the blade, and she ripped it out of her opponent's hands with a hard yank.

 _Ding._

Somebody else had come up the elevator. Who it was, J'Bari didn't know. Nor did she care, not while the infiltrator in front of her had flash-forged a bow of molten glass and an arrow, of all things. The khajiit's eyes widened as the single arrow in the infiltrator's other hand split into three.

The whips in her hands fizzled away as she hastily erected a barrier, deflecting the arrows away from herself. Two shot off and skittered away on the polished tiled floor, while one ripped into her right leg, breaking bone with an loud crack and sending her tumbling to the ground. She then heard footsteps rushing hastily away into the distance, followed by several loud bangs and shouting. Silently, she cursed to herself; the infiltrator would likely get away, given how skilled she was.

Another set of footsteps approached her from the direction of the elevator. A dull buzz was filling her hearing by now, and whatever the newcomers were saying came through as an indistinct haze of jumbled words. The last thing that she saw before everything faded to black was Ruby and Weiss' horrified faces, as well as Valeria's infuriated expression as she stalked after the infiltrator, several Dremora lords in her wake. And a completely shocked General Ironwood behind both of the huntresses.

* * *

A/N

Silly khajiit, one does not simply detect a sneak-thief without Life Detect. And now you've failed to put a big enough chip in Cinder's plans! Good job on making a mistake. It didn't have to be you. Nobody else would make that mistake. Even Mordin knows.

MeleeSmasher: Cinder moves where the power is greatest. She's a bit of a black hole of potential energy that way.


	19. 18 - The Plan

Despite the best efforts of huntsmen, professors, Vale Police Department – and even Valeria herself, utilising a horde of conjured wolves to try and track the scent of the infiltrator, she had gotten away, much to Valeria's chagrin. The infiltrator was far too experienced; the scent vanished abruptly in a fire escape tunnel under the Vale CCTS tower which led directly into Beacon Academy's dance party. Given the description that J'Bari had managed to croak out before she was sedated, the woman had long, dark raven hair and golden eyes; traits that were neither particularly specific nor telling, considering that Blake could very well fit that description, as could several other faunus students.

And so she was back empty-handed – and with a critically wounded apprentice in tow, being treated aboard her dreadnought. Team RWBY had been permitted to come with her at their insistence to accompany their injured friend; they could not stop themselves from wringing the khajiit's limp hand as she was moved about telekinetically. Valeria had to give the girls some credit, however. All four of them were channelling the best healing spells that they could as she moved her apprentice to a waiting Imperial shuttle.

She commended them, of course, for doing so. After all, allowing her to focus on the telekinesis and stasis spells allowed her to move J'Bari with minimal movement of the fallen khajiit's body, and their healing spells combined did replenish enough of her blood to stabilise her.

"Will she be alright?" Ruby asked quietly, listening to the quiet beeping of the various medical devices that the healers had attached to the khajiit's arm.

"I am informed that...she will most certainly live," Valeria sighed, carefully wording her response, "Thanks to your swift healing intervention, she was not completely deprived of blood. That...would be most unwelcome. And for that, I truly thank you all,"

"I'm sensing that there's more to it," Blake added, eyeing the way that Valeria was holding herself stiffly. That, and there was the ever-present chill in the air near her. So much so, that there were little icicles dangling from her whiskers, and that her tail looked as though it were a brush made of solid ice and frost. Not that any of them would tell her, of course, for fear of their lives.

"Ah, but of course you would notice, Miss Belladonna," Valeria growled, cradling her face in exasperation, "You were ever the perceptive one of your group. Suffice to say that J'Bari's raw magickal potential far outstrips my own at her age, and that she has...interesting mutations from exposure to a substance known as Element Zero,"

"Element Zero? And what mutations?" asked Weiss warily.

"Element Zero. Or as the miners call it, eezo. A strange element in the vastness of the Void. Exposed to lightning or any other form of electricity, it may either reduce the physical mass of an object, or greatly increase it, depending on what effect one desires. An essential element for the creation of mundane vehicles that do not require vast amounts of captured souls or stored magicka to function...and yet, so very highly toxic. A fraction of a pound inhaled would render one dead within minutes,"

"So if it's so poisonous, why is she alive...?"

"She was fortunate. Her mother was a lowly miner in a mining colony in the remote reaches of the Empire when an asteroid bearing large quantities of Element Zero impacted upon her station. Several bulkheads that were meant to contain breaches failed, and the entire colony was exposed to eezo dust through compromised air recycling systems. Those that were not instantly killed by exposure to hard vacuum were exposed to potentially lethal doses of eezo,"

"Oh, Dust..." Blake gasped, shuddering. Faunus were no strangers to accidents in mining, given how that task was often relegated to them, often with little or no safety equipment. It was a terrible way to go, no matter how one looked at it.

"Her mother survived for long enough to give birth to her, ever on the threshold of the afterlife for the last three weeks of her life. I was simply on a state visit to offer condolences and solace to those who had lost their loved ones when I encountered J'Bari. Left among the orphans, her mother departed for Aetherius hours after her birth. Her magicka...her reserves...they were nothing like I had ever witnessed before. Even as a child, her magickal signature was a blazing, blinding star burning brightly in her soul. A trained elite battlemage would have been hard-pressed to match her sheer magickal potential as a little kitten. Her mutation, as far as I can tell, permits her to store vast quantities of magickal energy in her body, much like a living soul gem,"

"Wait, you aren't saying...?" Weiss gasped, putting two and two together. She was immediately silenced by a deathly glare from Valeria, who cast a powerful silencing and darkening sphere over all of them.

"What you are about to hear," she growled lowly, making sure that all of them heard the implied threat behind her voice, "Is not to be repeated to _anyone_. Not even Professor Ozpin, not to any of your classmates. Especially Miss Valkyrie. Do I make myself clear, Team RWBY?"

The girls all looked at each other and gulped. Never have they seen the Archmage like this before.

"I say this, as you are all as much my apprentices as J'Bari is, and thus I trust you four with this secret. I adopted J'Bari as my own child, seeing a rare potential that I have not seen in a thousand years. I raised her as though she were simply another apprentice of mine, so that she would not feel so prideful as to think herself above her peers. I allowed her to rise through the ranks of the Imperial Legion on her own, so that she would know the struggles of those who serve to protect our Empire. I inducted her into the Imperial Inquisition, so that she would know that the forces of darkness operate ever in the shadows, and that she must be ever vigilant,"

Valeria took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "She is, to be proper, the Crown Princess of the Nirnian Empire. Kintyra Septim, the third of her name. My daughter in all but blood,"

Silence fell on the group. Ruby and Yang were gawking in shock at Valeria, while Blake looked merely mildly surprised. Weiss had covered her mouth with a hand, her mind racing at a million miles an hour as she tried to process the bombshell that had been dropped on them.

"So..." Yang muttered, shaking herself out of the stupor, "Why hide this? Why not tell her? This isn't right. Hiding something this big from her,"

"Yeah!" Ruby echoed, her cheeks puffing up in indignation. She had been raised without her mother for most of her childhood; and here was another young woman who had been raised as though she had no mother, despite her actually being there for most of her life!

"I only wished for her to live without the threat of assassination for another five years. Another five years until her true maturity in mind, body and spirit. Do not judge me as though I had abandoned her, Miss Rose," she growled, gritting her teeth, "You could not begin to fathom the plots upon the lives of my inner council and immediate dependents. Every year, dozens of assassination attempts targeted upon myself or my council are thwarted by the efforts of the Inquisition. I would sleep more soundly knowing that the daughter that I...that I love...would not be subjected to such threats for a few more years. Just a few more years,"

And then came a voice that Valeria had least expected to hear. "This one...is this one hearing the truth?" came J'Bari's voice; weak and raspy, though still trembling with palpable emotions; Valeria froze, blood draining from her shocked face, "This one...finds it hard to believe that this one is not in the realm of Sheogorath,"

"Don't jinx it," mouthed Weiss, shaking her head frantically. The last thing that they needed was Ra'shamarra appearing suddenly in their midst just because she heard her title spoken aloud. J'Bari flashed her a weak grin, though she soon turned to face Valeria with a confused and hurt expression.

"This one has always wondered why Your Majesty has been so...distant, and yet keeps J'Bari always close at hand. How Your Majesty was seemingly present at each ceremony that J'Bari was in, without fail, yet never speaks to her," J'Bari croaked hoarsely.

"How much did you hear, J'Bari?" Valeria murmured, after a brief moment of silence, "How much of our previous conversation did you hear...?"

"This one has heard...virtually all of it,"

The beeping of the machine beside her grew faster and higher-pitched. "This one has heard more than she needed to. All this one wishes to know is...does she truly have a mother...?"

"I'm not sure if I understand the question. You are my daughter, even if not by blood," Valeria replied, her expression one of shock and disappointment.

"This one has heard tales from other khajiit in the Legion. How their mothers loved them so, even after they had left their home. Showered them with gifts and comforting words, even through the hardest of missions," rasped the injured khajiit. "Where was this one's mother, when she needed support most? Silence and cold greeted her ears on those days, and only a lukewarm welcome when she returns after a successful mission!"

If Ruby's eyes were not fooling her, J'Bari's fingers were clenching around the bedsheets as hard as she could in her weakened state – and that a thin layer of frost was starting to form on them. Just as Valeria did when she was angry.

"Where was this one's mother, when she needed her most!?" repeated J'Bari, raising her raspy voice as loudly as she could, spitting out a few flecks of thick, drying blood. A wild burst of raw magicka sent bottles and equipment falling from nearby tables and onto the floor. Ruby, Yang and Blake were thrown to the ground by the shockwave, while Weiss' chair flipped over and deposited the heiress unceremoniously on the ground.

Valeria simply stood there, encased in a spherical barrier, weathering the storm even as ship alarms blared; her expression was completely inscrutable. J'Bari's magicka was wild, lashing out with frost and lightning at everything that drew near, and yet Valeria stood there, taking every hit.

"Your mother was always there...watching over you from a distance," the archmage whispered quietly, approaching J'Bari despite the frost, fire and shock. She waved a hand, and the fallen equipment righted themselves back to their original locations; a second shield enveloped the two of them afterwards, to prevent more damage. "From the shadows, ensuring that you were safe. That she would take the blades of assassins before they would reach you. That you would grow as a normal child would, without the corrupting trappings of royalty. That you would understand what it means to serve others out of love for them. Watching proudly as your abilities grew faster than she could ever hope for,"

"...What about now?"

"I..." she muttered, hesitating. How else could she show her sincerity? She was never one for affectionate physical contact; and yet, Yang and Ruby's insistent glares and their vehement nods convinced her to follow through. Gently, hesitantly, she wrapped her arms around her apprentice's shoulders. No, her _daughter_ 's shoulders. "Your mother is here, by your side, at this very moment," Valeria whispered, shedding a tear.

"Guys, I think we should leave. Now," Yang said to the rest of Team RWBY, who all nodded in agreement and quietly sneaked away, leaving Valeria to cradle J'Bari in her arms.

* * *

"HA!" cackled a madgod, back in her throne in the Shivering Isles, "Took her long enough to come clean! My daughter has a daughter of her own. Pity it wasn't her own. Or Serana's. Or both of them!"

"I believe that both of them would have improper...ah, plumbing...to do that, my lady," Haskill drawled, cocking his head to one side as he watched the scrying orb in front of Ra'shamarra.

"Improper plumbing? Why, that's absurd! None of them are made of pipes, you silly old goofball! And even pipes can be changed. Unless you mean THAT kind of plumbing. Wait, scratch that! Even THAT can be changed, at least for a little while. Alteration does have its perks. Oooh, now there's an idea! Let's give them the spellbook,"

"That spellbook, milady?"

"Yes, THAT spellbook! I believe that is what I said. Give them THE spellbook. Do it quickly, do it quietly, and get back here in time to watch their reactions! With me!" cackled the madgod, "Oooh. And do make sure that you aren't seen. It would be very inconvenient if I had to piece you back together, if my daughter catches you in her chambers,"

"...It will be done, milady," grumbled Haskill, displeased by the order and yet compelled to do it regardless. Sometimes, serving a Daedric prince had its downsides. Well, maybe most of the time.

* * *

"Thank you, Miss Rose, Miss Xiao Long," murmured Valeria, stepping out of the hospital room after several healers rushed to the scene to check on what had happened. "I suppose...that I have left that for too long. I am fortunate that she has taken the news rather well, even if it was not in a manner that I desired,"

"If you really cared about her, then you really should have told her a lot sooner," Ruby said firmly, "It's not nice to grow up without a mum,"

"And I should know that as well, young Rose," Valeria smiled ruefully, "With my mother taking the role of Sheogorath, and myself being left in the care of Archmage Polus. I should have seen this coming. However, what is done is done, and I can only hope that she will recover and forgive my mistakes over time,"

"Yeah...about that..." Yang mumbled, scratching the back of her head, "What's going to happen to J'Bari, Archcat? Are you going to let her...you know...call you-"

"No. Not yet, Miss Xiao Long. She will be able to, in time, when I am confident that she is capable of defending herself from assassins," Valeria spoke sharply, silencing Yang, "You have seen that though powerful, she is still too headstrong, hot-headed and inexperienced to truly take the threat of assassinations seriously. For now, it is better to hide her true identity,"

"That makes sense. If they don't know who she is, then nobody has any reason to target her," spoke Weiss, nodding in understanding, "I mean, you two don't even look alike,"

"That much is true, Miss Schnee. For now, she will be safe. Now, on to other matters at hand..."

Her gaze hardened as she stared out of a nearby viewing port at Remnant. "A threat to myself, I can forgive. A threat to my people, I will pursue," she growled, "A threat to my immediate family? I will crush the perpetrators until even not a single memory remains of them,"

"But how are you going to do that...?" Ruby asked, "We couldn't catch that infiltrator last night, even with so many people looking,"

"That may be so, Miss Rose. We could not find them when we searched for them ourselves. So, we will allow them to reveal themselves to us. Given the amount of Dust stolen, and by Torchwick's own testimonies, our enemy is hoarding a significant amount of firepower. What better way to lure them than with more firepower. Tell me, Miss Rose, have you or any of your team told anyone about what J'Bari is keeping in that secure lockbox of hers?"

"An orbital bombardment beacon...? No, haven't told anyone. J'Bari told us not to,"

"Very good. Then that makes what I am about to ask for a lot simpler. Return the lockbox to my alchemy classroom. I shall activate it and place it back in the box, thus allowing myself to determine its exact location at any given moment. Tomorrow, in class, I shall demonstrate an alchemically modified Fire Dust-based explosive, in the presence of the exchange students,"

Both Ruby's and Blake's eyes lit up at those words. "No, you will not have the recipe for the explosive. It is...ah, let us say...volatile. Extremely so, at this point. A slight breeze or tremor would be sufficient to detonate it, if it was not submerged in voidship-grade coolant,"

"Aww,"

"So...why demonstrate it if it's not ready?"

"I will do so in a way that creates the illusion that the explosive is stable and ready for deployment," Valeria spoke, grinning maliciously, "That way, in the event that our infiltrators are too curious for their own good and have somehow determined that the targeting beacon is not the weapon that they are after, then the next best thing happens,"

"Let me guess," Yang chuckled, returning the grin. This was a prank on a whole new level! "They steal the explosive, and it blows up when they pick it up?"

"Precisely, Miss Xiao Long. You are learning quickly,"

"What can I say? I'm just that good,"

* * *

A/N:

IT'S A TRAP!

AnotherGuest: Yep! The elevators are back with a vengeance - and an insatiable thirst for your time.

MeleeSmasher: Possibly. But I would think that stabbing someone's apprentice is probably not the best way to introduce yourself to the only person on that world that can teach the matter!

Quintain: -provides seashells for experiments-


	20. 19 - It's a Trap!

"Uh...guys?"

Ruby was the first one to have found the strange, unmarked spellbook that had been left on Team RWBY's dorm room. Out of curiosity, she found herself leafing through the pages, which were surprisingly still entirely written in untranslated Daedric. From what diagrams she could see, it was some sort of Alteration spell targeted on a person's body. But exactly what it was, she didn't know.

"What's that, Rubes? Some new textbook that Archcat gave you?" Yang asked, yawning.

"No. I mean, it was here, on our desk. It's...different,"

"What do you mean, it's different?" asked Weiss, raising an eyebrow. She strode over to Ruby's side and looked over her shoulder, scanning the lines of neatly-printed Daedric. "That's...oh, hold on. I'm going to need the translation book for this,"

"Whoa, you mean you actually have to read it in those weird letters? Didn't think that the Archcat would do that, even for your fancy Conjuration classes,"

"No, not for the level that we're taught, you brute," Weiss sighed, carefully flipping through the books under her bed, "Introductory Destruction...Restoration...Alteration...ah, here it is. The Daedric dictionary, translated to Remnant Common. We should be able to read it with this,"

"Oooh, let's see what it says then!"

Alteration, it seemed, stayed true to its philosophy of altering the world of those who wield it. Though in this case, it appeared that the School had more in common with Illusion than was believed, as the worldview of one particularly innocent huntress-in-training and her almost equally innocent partner was forever warped and twisted by the revelations held in the magickal manual. Let it be said that their views on what was male and what was female could never be the same again, for with sufficient effort and Alteration expertise, there was little distinction between the two; one could be the other, or one could be both simultaneously.

* * *

"Apprentices. I trust that there is a...reason for your distress?" Valeria queried, noticing how both Ruby and Weiss walked into the Destruction class early – and with thoroughly mortified expressions on their faces as they approached her. Both of them nodded silently, their faces burning a bright red. It did not take long before Valeria noticed the unmarked book held tightly in Weiss' hand; deducing that the book was the source of their distress, she held her hand out expectantly. Weiss immediately thrust the book into her hands, happy to be rid of the rather disturbing tome.

"What do we have here," Valeria murmured, flipping through the first few pages. Her expression, however, changed from curiosity, and then to disgust, and then to downright embarrassment. Eventually, she set aside the book and covered her face with her hands. "Where did you...where did you find this?" she growled out quietly, her blush showing even through her white fur, "I do not recall giving you...this sort of...spellbook,"

"I don't know!" Ruby replied, in a shrill, high voice, "Ijustwalkedbackintomyroomandfounditthen-"

"Calm down, Miss Rose," she muttered, rubbing her sore ears. Sometimes, sharp khajiit hearing could be rather painful around the little reaper. "When you can speak slowly again, please do so,"

"Okay. Okay," she huffed, breathing in deeply and regaining her composure, "I...well, me and Weiss were returning to our dorm rooms when I noticed that...that book on our desk. I opened it up...and then it was written in all this weird language,"

"Daedric," corrected Valeria.

"Okay. Yeah, that language. Daedric, Anyway, we couldn't read it, so Weiss took out her translation book and we started to read it..."

"Very well. So you have read it," sighed Valeria, hoping that the worst did not come to pass. Reversing a spell was possible; reversing a miscast spell, however, was a different story. There was a reason why the rather intimate spellcraft of Crantius Colto's mage daughter was only ever provided to those who had proven themselves at least experts of Alteration. The results of a miscast body alteration spell, to say the least, could be...disturbing. "Did you require the effects of the spell to be reversed?"

"What? NO!" both of the girls yelled, their faces burning up even more brightly than Valeria ever thought possible.

"Thank Akatosh that you have not. The reversal ritual would have been...rather awkward. Still, I trust that you have...learned the spell?"

"If by learning it you mean...reading it and understanding the...concepts?" Weiss replied uncertainly, "Then...yes?"

"Well then, the answer would be yes. It appears, Miss Schnee, that you must also master the concepts of Alteration alongside Miss Rose. Not that you have would have to learn much more; I have noticed that your papers written on the topic back in the University were of the highest standard, despite not being formally enrolled in the Alteration classes,"

"Thank you, Archmage. But...why would I need to formally study Alteration as well?"

"Because..." Valeria hummed, racking her mind to form the proper response to what she could sense. But before she could respond, purple smoke burst forth from a portal in the middle of the classroom, where a gleefully cackling Ra'shamarra stood, clapping her hands slowly.

"JUST SPIT IT OUT, YOU PRUDE!" she laughed, still clapping. She glanced once at a dumbfounded Ruby, and then at a stunned Weiss, giving them an amused smirk, "Why, have you a cold? Is your nose so blocked that you cannot smell their pheromones? Oh, why am I even asking. OF COURSE YOUR NOSE IS BLOCKED! By an ice block. A big ice block. Given how much you've used your magicka to conjure ice!"

"Ph-pheromones?" Weiss stammered, flushing and glancing at Ruby; the scythe-wielder was completely nonplussed, not knowing what the word even meant, "What...pheromones?"

Ra'shamarra zoomed up to Weiss and poked her nose, causing the heiress to let out an indignant 'eep!'. "Ha! Got you. Just kidding. Or maybe not. But who am I to decide!? I'm not Dibella, and Oblivion knows I'm not Mara. I don't have to match people up, you see? But given how SHE seemed to like feeding you from her own fork last time, and how YOU didn't even object, I felt like I had to give you two a chance. You know. Find love, all of that stuff that mortals seem to like to do in their spare time,"

Comprehension dawned on Weiss, and her face contorted in disgust. "Wait, _you_ sent _that_ book to _us_? Why? Why would you do...that!?"

"Yeah...ewww...gross, man-bits," Ruby whined, covering her eyes and shaking her head as she unwillingly recalled the things that she read about in that spellbook.

"Well, then I'm wrong, aren't I? Giving you something that you won't use," Ra'shamarra said, grinning, "Except I'm NEVER wrong! Oh, you will use it. Maybe not today. Maybe not in a week's time. Maybe not even in a year! Ah, what am I saying? Just keep it. A little knowledge never hurt anyone! Well, except those that wander into Mora's realm, but that's a different story,"

"Mother," Valeria said, interrupting her mother's almost-ranting monologue, "Is there a particular reason why you have decided to appear now?"

"Oh, how rude! I was just making sure that my gift has reached you,"

"Sending myself a gift, through my apprentices? One of whom is barely even considered an adult?" Valeria growled through gritted teeth, "This...I am loath to even call it a spellbook...is filled with filth. FILTH! Spare their eyes from such...material...next time you decide to send something like this,"

"Fine, fine, fine. Maybe. But it's so much fun, watching them get embarrassed. And yet they couldn't stop reading it!"

"You know...could we just...skip to the class now?" squeaked Ruby, who had by now curled up into a ball and wrapped both Weiss and herself in her cloak to spare themselves from further embarrassment.

"I believe that would be the best course of action," growled Valeria, glowering at her insufferably cheerful mother.

* * *

Thankfully, Destruction class went without another incident. She felt that her students were now ready to learn about shaped Destruction spells; flaming whips, swords and bows, lances and spears of lightning, or warhammers of elemental ice. When her assembled students cheered in enthusiastic approval after her announcement about their readiness, she felt her ears flatten against her skull. Teaching a motivated student in Destruction was already a hair-raising experience, with stray fire, frost and shock flying every which way; a crowd of overly excited students was likely twice as dangerous.

Her caution proved to be well-founded, and for once she was thankful that the outdoor amphitheatre that they used for Destruction class had finally received shielding on the seats. If it were not for those, she was certain that many of the students packing the seats would have been frozen solid by stray jets of ice; she herself had taken more than a few wayward whips of flame. One in particular, cast by one hot-tempered blonde, had left her whiskers and the fur on her ears well and truly singed by the heat of a flame whip that turned into a flaming tornado.

"Miss Xiao Long," she whispered in a dangerously sweet voice, her charred whiskers twitching, "I believe that I was clear about maintaining your concentration and keeping your temper in check. Especially during the casting of Destruction spells,"

"Oops," the blonde said sheepishly, "Sorry, Archcat. I guess I got carried away,"

"That will not do. You will write for me a four-page essay on spellcasting safety and shaping theory. The rest of you will be required to give me a two-page essay on shaping theory. Now, class is dismissed; any of you who are also enrolled in Alchemy, please remain behind. Everyone else may go, unless you are inclined to watch and learn,"

One by one, the extra students filed away back through the portal back to the alchemy classroom. Most of the exchange students left, though Valeria noted that there were still quite a few that remained behind; most were looking at her expectantly, as though waiting for more displays of spellwork.

"I trust that you are all remaining behind to observe the alchemy class?" she called out, asking the remaining students. They all nodded vigorously; she grinned in response, feigning happiness at their apparent enthusiasm. "Miss Belladonna, if you would be so kind as to fetch the equipment I require for today's demonstration, I would greatly appreciate it. Search under my desk in the alchemy laboratory for a steel crate,"

"Okay," the cat faunus responded, standing up and walking through the portal in the back of the amphitheatre. Within a minute, she returned, dragging a heavy crate behind her.

"Thank you very much,"

Valeria checked her scroll. Break time was over, and there were her usual Alchemy students filtering in through the portal; some were whispering among themselves, likely wondering why the class was being held in the amphitheatre, and not in the usual laboratory. There did not appear to be any more exchange students among them, and she surreptitiously took a photograph of the assembled class using her scroll.

"Now, it appears that it is time for the Alchemy class to start. Let us begin..."

* * *

"...Now, by the gro-Larga's Third Law of Matter-Magicka Conservation, can any person present explain why there is an absolute limit to the amount of essence extractable from any given ingredient?" Valeria spoke, watching the dazed looks on most of the class with more than a little frustration. Granted, they had not been taught the fundamentals from their childhood, as was mandatory for all Nirnian children; but as the supposed 'best and brightest' that Remnant could offer, she expected them to make up the difference in their spare time. Which, evidently, was not the case.

A snickering caught her attention. She narrowed her eyes and focused on the source of the noise; it was a silver-haired transfer student from Haven Academy. "I am sorry if your teachers from Haven Academy have not been entertaining enough to ensure that you are properly educated, young man. I assume that you have the answer, given your apparent amusement. Please, do explain to the class your answer,"

He immediately shut up, though the smirk on his face did not vanish. "Oh, sorry...ma'am. It's just that name was...very absurd,"

"Indeed, his name is rather unfortunate. You would not be the first to respond in such a manner," Valeria answered, frowning, "But I still expect an answer. If you would disrupt my class, please ensure that you have an answer,"

Turning back to the rest of the class, she grinned evilly. "Now, as for the correct answer. Gro-Larga's Third Law of Matter-Magicka Conservation states that matter may not be converted into more magickal essence than the sum of all the essence contained in the compounds converted. It is a rather verbose manner of saying that you cannot extract a powerful potion or poison from mundane items; if one wishes to produce powerful concoctions, one must provide something equally as powerful in exchange. Now, who wants to see an...experiment that I had completed to prove this point?"

Every hand in the room that belonged to her students shot up immediately, while the exchange students all raised their hands uncertainly. Grinning excitedly, Valeria rubbed her hands together.

"Very well," she spoke, slamming the tip of her staff against the faintly-glowing runes on the ground. A triple-layered shield materialised itself around the amphitheatre stage; another snap of her fingers, and an ice atronach walked in through a swirling purple portal.

"This ice atronach will be the target for today," she announced, causing the icy conjured creature to look at her strangely and then fall to its knees, slapping its stubby arms together as if to beg for mercy. "No. You will do as I say. You will return through Oblivion again regardless of whether or not your physical form is destroyed,"

The class stifled some laughter as the ice atronach seemed to glare at her. Without warning, it smashed bits of ice from one of its clubby hands, forming a crude impression of an extended middle finger.

"Yes, how charming," she said dryly, "Stand there, in the middle of the amphitheatre. And hold this for me,"

She pulled out a small reddish-white glowing tube from the steel crate and gently placed it into the atronach's hand. "There is only a minuscule amount of purified essence inside that vial. Perhaps less than a third of the mass of a single cookie from Beacon Academy's cafeteria-"

"COOKIE? Where!?"

"Miss Rose, please behave yourself," Valeria sighed, motioning for the red-cloaked reaper to sit back down, "Not a literal cookie. It was simply a comparison, seeing as most of the class has sampled the snack in question. However, my point still stands. There is only a very small amount in that vial. Given that it is an explosive, just how large do you all believe the explosion will be?"

"Can't be that big. That much Fire Dust? My boots fire more Dust than that with every shot," scoffed the silver-haired exchange student, now reclining on his chair and crossing his arms lazily behind his neck, "Come on, just show us what it does already. I'm dying of boredom here!"

"Your bravado seems to be only matched by your certainty. Let us see if you are correct, then,"

Valeria tapped her staff on the ground again, and made a triple-layered energy barrier around herself. Another tap, and a fourth layer of pitch darkness shot up between the audience and the stage, eliciting much protest from the gathered students.

"How are we supposed to see through this? It's like looking into Coco's sunglasses!" cried out Velvet, a chorus of agreement following her statement soon after.

"Shield your eyes, students. It will be brighter than bright," Valeria chuckled. "It appears that the barriers are ready. Assistant, if you would please break the vial with your head,"

The students were spared from seeing the atronach give its conjurer another obscene hand gesture before it was compelled to do as it was ordered.

* * *

Elsewhere in Beacon Academy, students were going about their own business when a tremendous tremor rocked the entire school, accompanied by a deafening blast. A searing hot wind rushed through the academy grounds, flipping seats and tables, and knocking over any potted plants and anything that wasn't secured by a bolt to the ground; students shrieked in fright when a miniature sun flashed into existence in the outdoor combat amphitheatre on the distant part of the school grounds, accompanied by an enormous fireball and a rapidly-rising mushroom cloud.

Ozpin looked out of his window when he saw the flash, shaking his head in disapproval at what could only be Valeria's doing. His scroll was already ringing madly with dozens of concerned students and several staff members asking about what exactly had just happened.

"We will need to talk later, Valeria," he murmured, typing an all-clear message and sending it to each of those who had decided to contact him.

* * *

"Now, I trust that you have all seen that the quantity of concoction does not necessarily correlate with its potency," Valeria said calmly, dispelling the barriers in the amphitheatre.

Many students had fallen over their benches in shock on the initial detonation; others were still covering their eyes, temporarily blinded even with the quadruple layer of shields that was between them and the explosion, one of which was specifically tinted black to guard against the flash. A red-hot glowing crater had been blasted into the marble floor; the edges had been turned to glass by the sheer heat released. Only a narrow strip of the original floor remained unscathed, blocked by Valeria's personal barrier.

"Miss- I mean, Archmage Septim?" Ruby squeaked, picking herself up from the ground; the girl's eyes were filled with stars, and she was bouncing up and down with excitement. "That. Was. AWESOME!"

"Indeed, Miss Rose. Overwhelming firepower in the smallest of devices. Without the shielding present in this building, I would daresay that likely all of us would have been turned to ash instantly. But it is dangerous to have out, and I would prefer that it remain in safe storage. I will expect all students of Alchemy to produce for myself a two-page essay on each of gro-Larga's Laws of Matter-Magicka Conservation, due by next week. That will be all for today; Miss Belladonna, if you would please come down to assist with returning the box to where you have found it, I would greatly appreciate it. As for the rest of you, you are free to leave or speak to me if you require further guidance on the subject of Alchemy,"

Blake was still covering her eyes from the blinding blast, but nodded to show that she heard Valeria anyway. As the cat faunus walked down, Valeria watched the students; most of them were now filing out of the room in various states of disorientation, including the exchange students. A mint-haired girl was assisting the rather rude young man from before with walking to the portal back to the original alchemy laboratory; she was glancing towards Blake, while avoiding the cat faunus' gaze. Neither of them looked like the infiltrator from before, but neither did they have a reason to be following Blake's every movement so carefully.

"Hm. Perhaps our infiltrator has underlings," she whispered under her breath, making note of the exchange students' physical appearances. Both were from Haven Academy, if she recalled correctly; she would have to check in with Professor Ozpin to determine their identities later.

* * *

A/N:

IT'S A TARP! *throws a blue piece of plastic cloth over the exploding potion* ...Hmm, maybe that's not secure enough for a miniature thermonuclear warhead. *tosses more tarps on the exploding potion* Good enough.

Also, E = mc^2 in Nirnian Empire, where m is not the mass to be reacted. Since Dust is almost pure elemental essence...I'll let you guys fill in the rest.

crimson katana: Yes, it has 'that' kind of spells. The Madgod is a bit of a troll that way, and I do have something planned with that book.

Mpopl2: I've said this a few times before, but I suppose it doesn't hurt to repeat it. The characters and universe of the Nirnian Empire are taken from my Mass Effect x Elder Scrolls crossover, "Imperium Aeternit". While there may be bits and pieces taken out of the Mass Effect universe, this will be almost completely about the Elder Scrolls x RWBY side of things.

Reaver17: No significant biotics here. Just a benign mutation caused by eezo exposure.

Quintain: Seashell: Effects found: Resist Feels, Resist Cute, Resist Poison, Restore Feels.

ivanruzic: Cinder isn't stupid, but her underlings might be. Either way, there's some more trolling coming around the corner! As for that transformation, we'll just have to see, won't we? After all, an adopted heiress to an Empire is likely less legitimate than that who is actually descended by blood from a true Septim line.


	21. 20 - Hook, Line and Sinker

"Archmage Septim. Thank you for visiting as soon as you could,"

"There is no issue with that, Professor Ozpin. One must always be punctual, after all," Valeria replied crisply, conjuring a floating cushion of ice in front of Ozpin's desk and seating herself, "Is there a reason for this meeting? I would not think that you would be one for idle chatter; after all, you are a busy man,"

"Yes, that would be correct. There are...quite a few things that we must discuss. The first is that while I understand Alchemy can result in some rather dangerous products, yesterday's explosion was perhaps a little much. Do try to avoid blowing up the school with your experiments. Miss Belladonna had already almost done so in her own dormitory,"

Valeria smiled wryly despite herself. That little potion crafted of highly refined Fire Dust and purified Fire Salts was quite something else. The yield of the explosion was far stronger than what she had expected, but the shielding that she had installed in that amphitheatre was fit to resist even asteroid impacts. It would hold, even if she had thrown in ten times as much. Still, the headmaster had a point. While the shielding on the _sides_ of the amphitheatre had been sufficient, the building had an open roof – and a floor that wasn't made of magickally-damped composite materials. No doubt the blast could have been seen and felt from Beacon, if not Vale itself.

"The second is that it appears that you have had a break-in at night, in your rooftop laboratory. Whoever the culprit is was thorough; every single surveillance camera had been disabled for almost a full eight hours,"

Valeria held up a hand to stop Ozpin from saying anything more. "I am well aware of that, Professor Ozpin," she spoke calmly, "And it was entirely to plan. Given the pattern of thefts of military-grade Dust crystals and munitions from all the shops all throughout the Kingdom of Vale, and Roman Torchwick's own admissions, I suspected that whoever is behind the attempted assassination of my apprentice is after a very significant amount of firepower. What better lure do we have than an explosive that may well level most of Vale if used in large quantities?"

Ozpin frowned and shook his head. "That would be too much. Was that really necessary?"

"No, not really. I simply wished to test a sample that I had crafted. No other sample exists at this moment. The thief, whoever he or she is, has taken the bait, however. Both the cases under my desk have been stolen, though nothing else was taken aside from...an ingot of silver,"

"Silver?" asked the headmaster, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, silver. An important ingredient in curative potions, where it serves to catalyse the removal of all negative residual essence from the initial extraction. And if I am guessing correctly, it is as valuable on Remnant as it is in my Empire. Whoever our thief is cannot resist the lure of wealth,"

"I see. So our thief lacks sufficient self-control to keep him or herself from taking other objects, even if it would deviate from their main objective. What about the stolen cases? You said that there were no other samples of the highly explosive compound that you had created. What were in those, then?"

"Orbital strike beacons. Both have been already activated with my authorisation," she replied, grinning when Ozpin's eyes widened, "Do not worry. I have informed my troops that they are to hold fire until I say otherwise. My personal vessel, however, can pinpoint the exact location of these cases,"

"Hmm. Interesting. A homing device that the enemy is unwittingly carrying. What if they open the cases and discover them?"

"Then our thief will be swiftly introduced to the afterlife," she replied simply, shrugging, "Opening the magickal combination lock requires proper training in Destruction. Failing to disarm the locks with the correct combination will cause the entire case to detonate in fire, frost and shock. In any event, we will either discover where they are taking the explosives, or at least one of our culprits will be very much dead,"

Ozpin took another sip from his coffee cup, his expression still inscrutable. Given what her students had said, however, Valeria was certain that he disapproved of how little she regarded the potential killing of a thief. Not that she cared in the least. After all, while the road to Oblivion was paved with good intentions, the road to Sovngarde was paved with much action. Some of which were bloodier than others.

"Can you tell me where the cases are, at this moment?"

"An excellent question. Let us see," she hummed, pulling out a dataslate from one of her robe pockets. "Hm. It appears that whoever our thief is, they are moving quickly. Six hours ago, both were still in Beacon Academy. Four hours ago, I was informed that they had started to move towards Vale's harbour. And now, I am informed that the beacons are now quite some distance southeast of Vale. Surface scans confirm that the signal is coming from underground, under what appears to be a ruined city that is thoroughly infested by Grimm,"

"Mountain Glenn," Ozpin commented, deep in thought.

"If that is the name of the location, then yes. Are there any civilians still living there?"

The professor raised his eyebrow. "What are you trying to suggest?"

"If there are no upstanding citizens residing there, I would recommend simply erasing the target from existence. A half-mile wide blast should be sufficient. After all, it would also remove a potential Grimm habitat as well, saving your huntsmen and huntresses from risking their lives there,"

Ozpin blinked in disbelief. "Absolutely not. You will do no such thing," he replied, "We do not know for certain what is there, and erasing a reminder of the past is not something that is to be taken lightly,"

Frowning, Valeria stood up, dispelling the icy chair that she was sitting on. "Very well then. As difficult as it makes my task, I shall respect your wish as Vale is ultimately under your government's jurisdiction, and not mine. However, make no mistake; if there is a dire threat that lurks there that threatens many citizens of Vale, and I am unable to destroy it on my own, then I will call down an orbital strike on it. The lives of those living in the present are more valuable than those who have died in the past,"

"Fine. I trust that you will exercise proper restraint in use of force," sighed Ozpin, taking another sip from his coffee.

Proper restraint in use of force. What a foolish idea, Valeria thought to herself. There was only one acceptable level of usage of force. Enough to completely annihilate a threat. If the threat still existed afterwards, one simply did not use enough force. And judging by the fact that the Grimm had overrun most of the planet, perhaps it was a good time to remind them of that simple fact.

* * *

"Oooh, so this is the day! The day when we go on our FIRST PROPER MISSIONS!" squealed Ruby excitedly. "Come on, guys! Come on! Let's go and see what we can choose,"

"Well, she's starting the day with a _Yang_ ," grumbled her sister; Ruby had squealed _very_ loudly, right next to her ear, "But yeah! Let's go and check it out. First one gets all the good ones and all that, right guys?"

"I suppose that's true," Blake mumbled, yawning widely as she pulled up behind Yang. The blonde suddenly turned around and pulled in the cat faunus into a tight hug. Or rather, _tried_ to; Blake hissed and slapped Yang on the cheek out of reflex. Hard.

"Oww. No coffee makes Blakey grumpy," Yang groaned, rubbing her stinging cheek. Judging by how Ruby was giggling, there was probably a red handprint there.

"Sorry, Yang. I'd prefer to...wake up first before doing anything like that," Blake apologised, crossing her arms, "You know that I've been up all night, right?"

"Yeah, we know. Making healing potions again. Thanks for that, Blakey, we really love you for it,"

This time, a scratch behind her bow elicited a very quiet purr. Just loud enough for Yang to hear it. When Blake wasn't paying attention, Ruby took a peek inside the satchel that she was carrying.

"Uh, Blake? What's...all these? I thought healing potions were always red?" Ruby asked curiously, pulling out a strange large vial containing a brightly-glowing ice-blue liquid. There were seven crudely-marked lines on the side in permanent marker, splitting it into doses.

"That one's for Yang," yawned Blake, covering her mouth with a hand, "Seeing as she was keeping me awake-"

"-More like all of us awake at night. Except Ruby," Weiss grumbled under her breath, recalling the loud purring and shaking that came from Yang and Blake's shared bed every night for the last week. Among other unmentionable noises. Why she was not a heavy sleeper like Ruby, she would never know; but now, she hated being a light sleeper more than ever.

"-She's going to be carrying our stuff. And I mean _our_ stuff. Otherwise...well, let's just say that she'll be losing a few privileges at night,"

Now it was Yang's turn to gawk at Blake. "Oh come _on_ , Blakey, you can't be serious? That's a lot of camping gear that I have to carry! Four bedrolls, two tents; water, food and potions...and...whatever Rubes is carrying?"

"You don't need to carry this!" Ruby answered quickly, holding up her hands and waving frantically as she stepped back, "I'll...uh, I'll just keep it on me. Yeah,"

Yang looked strangely at her sister for a moment, but eventually shook her head. If she was going to carry that herself, that was fine.

"Still, even without that, that's a whole lot of gear. And you want me to carry _all_ of that, for the next what, a week?"

"Which is why I've read up a bit further into the Alchemy manual and made some strength-enhancing potions. After a bit of trial and error, it looks like Gravity Dust and some of this glowing purple jelly works for that effect. Well...aside from...some minor side effects,"

"Wait, _Gravity_ Dust?" Ruby asked, cocking her head to one side, "Where'd you get that? I mean, Weiss doesn't use any Gravity Dust, and Yang uses mostly Fire...wait..."

"Uh...I might have taken a few Gravity Dust magazines from Crescent Rose...and emptied out the propellant from the cartridges..." Blake said cautiously, watching Ruby's shocked expression with more than a little bit of fear.

"You touched _Crescent Rose_? Without telling me first?! And took apart some cartridges?!" shrieked the team leader, scandalised, "HOW COULD YOU?!"

And thus began a nearly endless game of tag; the red reaper's Semblance of speed allowing her to almost reach Blake, but never quite quick enough to catch her before she left behind a shadow clone; yet Blake was never able to run quickly enough to properly escape from the very fast-moving red blur that was tailing her. Eventually, however, they were both brought to a halt when Weiss decided enough was enough and froze their feet with judicious use of Ice Dust and Myrtenaster.

"Alright, you dolts, enough is enough. Ruby, you still have enough gravity ammunition to work with, and if you don't, I can always order some more when we come back. Blake, you need to ask first before you take things. So, put this aside for now, and we can sort it out later. Otherwise, I'll have to cool both of you off. Deal?" she spoke, conjuring a misty ball of frost in her free hand and letting it coat the ground in a menacing slick of icy spikes. The black and red girls both gulped and hobbled slowly back towards Weiss, their boots still caked in ice. She made a mental note to thank Valeria for teaching her that little trick about intimidation later. "Good. We have to be assigned our missions first, before everyone else gets the good ones,"

"Hey Blakey, when you said...minor side effects," Yang asked slowly, stroking her own hair, "...What sort of side effects are we talking about here?"

"The kind that makes your...urine glow in the dark. A really, really, intense blue," she answered slowly, grimacing at the memories of testing it on herself.

* * *

A few minutes later, Team RWBY entered the Beacon Auditorium, where all the other teams had already assembled. Several computer stations had already been set up around the perimeter of the hall, around which teams gathered to select their missions. On spotting an empty one, Ruby clapped her hands together and zoomed over to it, leaving a trail of rose petals in her wake.

"Mine!" she sang, tapping a single finger on the screen. She pouted when she saw that several other missions had already been selected by other teams; mostly those that were in easier, low-Grimm-density areas, like Forever Fall and the outskirts of Vale. Scrolling down, however, she noticed that there were several missions located in none other than Mountain Glenn. One set of coordinates, however, caught her eye.

"Hey, guys," she said quietly, motioning for the others to come to her, "Isn't that...you know, the place that Torchwick said that he was storing lots of Dust? Somewhere in the southeast of Mountain Glenn?"

"Yeah. That looks about right," Blake murmured. The cat faunus pulled her scroll out of her pocket and pulled up the map of Vale. Several locations were marked with red circles; those were the ones that Torchwick had admitted to having Dust stashes. And the mission coordinates pointed squarely on one of the circles.

"Well. That's...not disturbing. Not at all," Weiss said, glancing at Ruby and Blake's questioning expressions, "What sort of mission is it?"

"Looks like it's a Search and Destroy. With lots and lots of Grimm on site. Supposedly, the level of Grimm activity makes it unsuitable for first-year students,"

Ruby fell silent, lost in thought. There were other missions in the areas next to that particular site. If they finished their mission quickly, maybe they could check out the location of the other mission. Quietly, of course; Ozpin didn't need to know about that.

"Maybe...we could sneak there? You know, after finishing another mission?" she suggested. When her teammates all frowned at her, she snapped her fingers and came up with an even brighter idea. "Or maybe, we could mail ourselves there!"

"You know, dolt, sometimes I wonder how you got into Beacon. That's...got to be one of the worst ideas that I've heard so far,"

"Good morning, girls. Staying safe, I hope?"

That was definitely not a voice that any of them wanted to hear. "Eeep! Professor Ozpin!" Ruby yelped, spinning around so fast that she smacked Blake with her backpack, "Um...hi?"

"Good morning, Miss Rose. I assume that you are so excited for your first mission, that you wish to take on a more difficult mission? One that is supposedly more difficult than what first year students are capable of handling?"

"Uh...maybe? Yeah, maybe. Um, Professor? How much of...you know...did you hear?"

Ozpin chuckled lightly. "Almost all of it, Miss Rose. Though I must admit that I am not shocked that you are aware of the locations of the Dust caches that Roman Torchwick has stolen. You are, after all, four of the closest students to Valeria, and she had brought that information to myself some time ago,"

Yang and Blake shared a look. They had helped to extract that information from Torchwick. Of course they would know! But that was something that Ozpin did not need to know.

"That particular mission is in a location that is highly infested by Grimm. So much so, that I believe that it would be nearly suicidal to send first years to such a site. However, knowing your determination to reach your target once you have set your mind on it, Miss Rose, you would find a way to reach it anyway. So, how about we bend the rules a little,"

Ozpin tapped on the console a few times, and the mission card lit up with a green light. It was still the same Search and Destroy mission; but instead of being assigned to Team RWBY, it indicated that there were two huntsmen assigned to the mission, with Team RWBY attached as observers.

"Oh, thanks Professor Ozpin!" Ruby said cheerfully. Now they would not have to sneak around anything or anyone to get to their intended destination!

"Do not thank me just yet. You must survive first," he said, taking a sip from his coffee cup, "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have other things to attend to,"

"Hmm, so...two huntsmen. Who do you think we've been assigned to?" murmured Weiss, cupping her chin in deep thought. Professor Port would likely bore them all to death before the Grimm could reach them; Professor Peach didn't look like the type that would venture out on a journey, and Professor Goodwitch had to be at Beacon to help Professor Ozpin take care of the academy. That left...

"Oh my Dust. Kill me now," Yang gasped, noticing the man in the explorer's khaki outfit beside a stony-faced Valeria. The shock of green hair and thermos could only belong to one particular huntsman in the entire academy.

* * *

A/N

MeleeSmasher: Exploding plans are par for the course :D

Quintain: I wonder if there's a hermit crab Grimm somewhere out there...that would be an epic seashell to run tests on.

Reaver17: But you still haven't read the book where cats can be bats can be rats can be hats can be gnats can be that's can be thises. And that doors can be boars can be snores can be floors can be roars can be spores can be yours can be mine. Wabbajack. Wabbajack. Wabbajack. Wabbajack is glorious :D


	22. 21 - Stress Relief

"Professor Oobleck? You're the huntsman assigned for this mission?" gasped Weiss. Not once did she ever think that Oobleck was the type to engage in _any_ sort of combat. The man seemed so gentle and caring in class; less preoccupied with the destruction of Grimm than the betterment of society and the reconciliation of faunus and humans. She found it very difficult to even imagine him being out in the field, destroying Grimm. After all, how could someone so absorbed in his own studies be a proficient huntsman as well?

"Yes. I am the huntsman assigned for this search-and-destroy mission. While I do prefer scholarly pursuits over the hot and bothersome task of eliminating Grimm, I am still capable of doing this when required! And Miss Schnee," the green-haired huntsman said quickly, before zooming to glare at Weiss so closely that their noses were touching. "It's _Doctor_ Oobleck. I didn't earn the PhD for fun, thank you very much!"

Ruby shared an awkward look with Blake, while Yang was doing her best to stop her urge to gag. Team RWBY was _definitely_ having second thoughts about the mission now. Classes with Dr. Oobleck were hard enough to follow; the man was as quick with his mind and speech as Ruby was with her feet. Not a single student was left without a headache after one of his gruelling classes, and that was only for an hour at a time. To be stuck with him for up to a week? That was horrifying to think about.

"So uh...if you're the first huntsman...who's the second that's coming with us?" Ruby asked, tilting her head.

"That...would be myself, Miss Rose," Valeria answered, crossing her arms. She was not wearing her usual purple-and-gold robes. Instead, she was wearing some kind of very heavy armour that covered her from neck down. Each piece of black plating seemed to be moulded to fit precisely to her form, with some sort of mesh filling in the flexible gaps between the plates. Even her tail was encased in overlapping scales of the same material, so well-fitted that it looked like it was impossible to slip a knife in between two scales. The only part of her that was not armoured was her head, and even that was shrouded in an ornate black-and-crimson hood. Her usual gold-and-red staff was gone, replaced by a jet-black staff topped by a statuette of a black dragon spreading its wings around a large violet crystal.

The red lines etched on the scarred surface of the armour periodically glowed with a sinister light; and every time it did so, Weiss swore that _something_ was looking at her, peering into her very soul. Was that the bulky pistol at her hip? The one with what looked like the snarling face of a wolf in the place of a muzzle, brilliant blue arcs of energy sparking in its jaws?

"Miss Schnee, it is rude to stare,"

Valeria's stern voice snapped Weiss out of her reverie, and she shook herself to clear her mind. "Sorry, Archmage Septim. It's just...what is with the armour? I haven't seen anything like it before,"

"While I am certainly capable of defending myself without armour, Miss Schnee," she spoke, "I will take no chances on a mission. Especially with a skilled fighter on the loose capable of wounding my apprentice present in the vicinity of Vale. As for your second question, this is my personal suit of Daedric armour,"

"An interesting design," Oobleck murmured, "Looks like a suit of medieval plate armour. Yet well articulated, beyond technology expected of that era! I should like to examine it, if-"

"No, this armour is not available for any one of you to examine. Yes, that includes you, Miss Rose. Especially you," Valeria said flatly, "And yes, Doctor Oobleck, you would be correct that this would be designed after plate armour from early Fifth Era, before I had united all of Nirn under one nation. It is perhaps a thousand years old, if not longer,"

"One thousand years old. Simply astounding! An ancient artifact such as this should belong in a museum, for all to see!"

"Perhaps one could think so. But so long as there is war within and without my realm, and I still live and breathe to defend my subjects, then I shall have need of it. And there is another reason why displaying it for all to see and approach is a terrible idea, which I shall explain later, without other ears to eavesdrop on our conversation. We are bound to travel to the site of a mission, are we not? Then let us go,"

* * *

Valeria was staring out the window at the rest of Vale. If she had her way, she would have called in a frigate to take them to the mission site. The primitive airships that the denizens of Remnant used were far too slow for her liking, and infinitely too noisy as well. Even with the muffling enchantments on her hood, she could still hear that incessant drone of the vehicle's turbines.

"So uh, I didn't take you for someone that goes down into the field very often, Archcat," Yang spoke to Valeria.

"One must be prepared to lead from the front at all times," she said tersely. Racking back the slide on her pistol, she examined the shaped soul gem that was held within, wiping away a small speck of dust that had gotten inside. "And, if I must say so, I am looking forward to destroying Grimm. Or anything else that may be in between myself and my goal for this mission,"

"That's not all, is it?" the blonde huntress teased, earning her a deathly glare from Valeria.

"No, indeed it is not, Miss Xiao Long. Let us say that after what has happened to my apprentice, I am after a little bit of...stress relief. Of the sort that involves the destruction of some unworthy lifeforms,"

Ruby and Weiss looked at each other and shivered. The simmering rage that was barely audible under the khajiit's otherwise calm voice was truly, truly terrifying. Not even Goodwitch had managed to drill that into them after the food fight that left the entire cafeteria thoroughly trashed.

"Though I must admit," she murmured, eyeing Yang and the vast pile of bags beside her, "I am uncertain as to why you have so many bags. Am I correct in assuming that your teammates have somehow coerced you into carrying their belongings as well on this trip?"

"Well, I can't just leave them _Yanging_ without their stuff," joked Yang. Valeria shook her head disapprovingly, and simply waved her hand over the whole pile. In a puff of purple smoke, every single bag vanished.

"There. You have no reason to be carrying so much equipment on your person," Valeria said; Yang looked as though the Winter Solstice Festival had just come early, while Blake silently fumed as her punishment had just unravelled completely.

"Wait, if the bags are gone...where have they gone?" Yang wondered aloud, prompting Ruby to pat her own back to check for her bag. Her face paled as she realised it was no longer on her shoulders.

"Which other Daedric Princes do you believe would allow such trivial uses of their realm?" deadpanned Valeria.

* * *

Meanwhile, in the Shivering Isles...

"HASKILL!"

"Yes, milady?"

"HASKILL! Where have all these bags COME FROM?!"

The Seneschal of Madness sighed and walked to the source of his mistress' voice. In her private chambers were a pile of satchels and rucksacks, some of them almost bursting at the seams with Mora knows what.

Well, make that literally bursting at the seams, as one particular bag burst open. Out of it came a sealed box of toiletries, all of which were strawberry-scented, along with dozens of cans of dog food and a can opener – and the dog itself.

"A dog? Somebody packed a _dog_ in a bag? Why, this is ridiculous!" cried out Ra'shamarra, picking up the black-and-white corgi by the scruff of its neck. "Only I pack dogs in bags! Or was that cats? Never mind, the cats must be out of their bags by now. Who puts cats in bags anyway? Oh wait, that would be me!"

The dog, sensing Ra'shamarra's excitement, began to wag its tail rapidly and licked the khajiit's nose. She blinked once – twice – and then burst into uproarious laughter.

"Oooh, I like you. Such cheek! Such impudence!" she cackled, spinning the dog around, "Giving the Daedric Prince of Madness a kiss? Why, such a thing hasn't happened for...years! Well, unless you count myself giving myself a kiss. But that's only because I had a mirror! Which broke immediately after, but it's the thought that counts, am I right? I'm great, and I know it! Don't you agree, you cheeky little mutt?"

"Arf!" it barked, giving her another lick.

"Oh, alright. I'll let you down. Stay. Don't move. Haskill! Is there SOMETHING that tells us where this mutt has come from?! Or whose these bags are?"

"It appears that these bags belong to your daughter's students. They appear to contain sleeping bags and many packages of food and water,"

Ra'shamarra's jaw dropped. "A camping trip? And I wasn't invited? I WASN'T INVITED?!" she gasped, scandalised, "Well, that won't do, will it? I'll just...invite myself then! HASKILL! Get me my staff and my travelling gear!"

Haskill sighed. This was going to be a long day.

* * *

"Ladies! You still may be students, but as of this moment, your first mission as Huntresses has begun! From this point forward, you need to do exactly as I say! Do you understand?"

Each of the members of Team RWBY nodded, though they noticed that Valeria was frowning in concentration. The red jewel in her amulet was shining exceptionally brightly, as if it were reacting to something in the air.

"There is...something very wrong with this ruined city," she hissed, her eyes livid, "The air is thick with the souls of those long dead. Something here is preventing them from moving on. They cry for help, to release them from their torment,"

"How do you know this, Valeria?"

"The crown jewels of the Nirnian Empire are not simply decoration. The Amulet of Kings, for example," she pointed to the amulet on her breast, "Aside from being a symbol of Imperial authority, is quite literally a soul gem of limitless capacity. Every citizen of the Empire, who has sworn fealty to myself through birth or oath, lends a small piece of their soul to this jewel. It reacts to unbound souls; especially to those who have not been able to find eternal rest,"

Oobleck raised an eyebrow and zoomed towards her, inspecting the blood-red jewel closely. He flared his Aura; if it were a receptacle of souls, it should react very strongly indeed to that.

Which proved very much true, as the jewel shone as bright as a star for a brief moment. All manner of colours intermingled in a brilliant lightshow, as though countless rays of sunshine were passing through innumerable minuscule diamonds. "Incredible," he said slowly, "I've never seen anything like it! It's like...touching upon millions – no, _billions_ – of souls!"

"Sadly, this is not the original," she spoke, pressing a hand to its warm surface, "The first Amulet of Kings had been shattered by my father in the Battle for the Imperial City, during the Oblivion Crisis,"

"What? Why would he do that?" gasped Weiss. She had read about the basics of soul binding in her studies of Conjuration; the destruction of the receptacle would release the energies of whatever creature or creatures were bound within.

"I was not yet born during the Crisis, so what I am to tell you is what I have heard from eyewitnesses. Supposedly, the original Amulet of Kings held a portion of Akatosh's powers, gifted by him to Saint Alessia. Smashing the jewel transformed my father into a literal god for a few minutes; more than enough to banish the Daedric Prince of Destruction and his forces,"

"Transformation into a god...infusing a soul with another soul," Oobleck murmured, wondering about the potential applications of these revelations, "Incredible, yet disturbing. Are you saying that the destruction of what you call a soul gem empowers its user?"

"Miss Schnee, or Miss Rose, you may answer this question. Arsindis of High Rock's Prime Limitation on Enchantments,"

"Uh...the prime restriction...err...hang on a second! I've got it!" Ruby cried out, pursing her lips in deep concentration. Eventually, however, she sighed, slumping her head down, "No, I don't,"

"You would do well to remember this one, as you seem to be very attached to your Crescent Rose. Losing it to an improper enchantment would not be in your best interests," Valeria spoke, "The receptacle of an enchantment must be equal or greater in potential than the source of its energy. Exceeding its innate potential will result in the degradation of its physical form at a rate directly proportional to the amount that is exceeded,"

"So you're saying...that the stronger the enchantment, the stronger the material required?"

"Precisely. Now, consider that a god is literally capable of manipulating reality in whichever way he desires. This is a very powerful being, with powers beyond our comprehension. Even the slightest sliver of divinity is still immensely powerful. By smashing it, he accepted its power. Do you recall the dragon statue in the Imperial City's Temple of the Nine, Miss Rose?"

"Uh, yeah, I don't think any of us missed that. Here, Doctor, I have a photo of it on my scroll,"

"That statue is not exactly a statue. Upon banishing Mehrunes Dagon to the deepest pits of Oblivion, my father's body could no longer withstand the overflowing energy that he embraced. The price of his use of Father Akatosh's power was petrification,"

Yang whistled lowly. "That just got really dark, Archcat. So why are you carrying that around, then?"

"Because, Miss Xiao Long, unlike the original, this particular amulet is a lesser copy, and will not have that same reaction. But enough talking for now. We have a mission, and I desire some stress relief, not a lecture on Nirnian history nor magickal theory. Bartholomew, I believe that your mission was to exterminate all Grimm in the area?"

"Yes, that would be correct. We really should get started, ladies, before the sun goes down and we must make camp,"

"Very good. Then I shall provide assistance from the air. My search for whatever binds the souls of the fallen to this world can wait for later,"

"From the air? I thought that the Council of Vale banned your vehicles from entering Valean airspace after formal complaints from Atlas?"

Valeria gave the bemused doctor an amused grin. "Vehicles, yes. They did not prohibit me from riding creatures of my homeworld. **DURNEHVIIR**!"

A vast circle of purple flames burst forth in the centre of the open plaza that they had landed in. All of the girls moaned in disgust when they caught the stench of rotting flesh and putrefying skin. Slowly, a massive, shadowy silhouette began to form in it, growing more and more solid. Eventually, the hulking form of a dragon took shape. Its wings were wider than three Bullheads side-by-side; dripping sticky green pus from its decaying scales, its putrid breath even causing the usually unfazed Dr. Oobleck to turn a little green.

"Dragon," Weiss whispered in shock, fighting back the urge to retch, "A-a real dragon!"

"Ah, _Qahnaarin_. It has been too long since you have last called me from the Soul Cairn," he spoke, in a deep, reverberating baritone, "Yet the _lok_ – the sky – it is not that of Nirn. I do not feel the bindings of the Ideal Masters as strongly here,"

" _Drem yol lok_ , Durnehviir," she replied, "You are correct, in that this is not Nirn. This world is called Remnant. And I have brought you here for a reason,"

"Speak, and I shall listen, _thuri_. If it is within my power to grant your wishes, it shall be done,"

"Ah, but this is a request that benefits us both," she spoke, smiling, "Do you not wish to hunt from the skies, as the _dovah_ of old did?"

He chuckled in amusement. "Of course, _thuri._ Though I suspect that you have a request to make of myself, and not simply offer a gift for nothing?"

"Indeed, old friend, indeed. I wish to ride upon your shoulders as we hunt,"

"Wait, wait, wait," Ruby said quickly, interrupting the two, "You're riding on him?"

Valeria shot her a glance and nodded, igniting the tip of her staff and forming a scythe-blade of energy. A wave of her hand, and an ethereal saddle fastened itself about the undead dragon's neck. With a burst of energy, Valeria launched herself high and floated down onto the saddle.

"Let us make this hunt interesting, shall we?" she shouted to the rest of the students, "A friendly competition, and a wager. Team RWBY, against myself and Durnehviir,"

"Valeria, I do not think that is appropriate-"

"What sort of bet?" Yang shouted, interrupting Dr. Oobleck.

"The sort that incentivises you to slay Grimm efficiently. Whoever slays the most Grimm before sundown is the victor,"

"What happens if we lose?"

"I will...double the amount of work that you must perform in your spare time for the rest of the week,"

"And if we win?"

"I shall grant each of you a wish, provided that it is not for misdeeds or of excessive value,"

Yang hummed, pondering about the possibilities. Looking at the rest of her team, she noticed that Weiss was shaking her head; Blake simply shrugged, while Ruby was bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet in excitement. Grinning widely, Yang approached Valeria and offered a hand.

"You're on, Archcat!"

* * *

A/N:

Auntie Sheo never goes without an invitation. She will ALWAYS invite herself, whenever she damn well pleases! :D

Shamwoohoo: As Aura is quite literally a projection of the soul, a full-blooded vampire will still be able to have their Aura unlocked. They are, after all, still 'alive' in the sense that they still have their souls, though they are actually undead. However, owing to her diet of animal souls...let us say that I have plans for how that will turn out in future chapters. Durnehviir is in this chapter, of course.

Dragon Man 180: Auntie Sheo is the type of person you'd expect to just troll and prank everyone whenever she can, just to drive them insane. Giving Pyrrha something risque seems to be something that she might do...but you should never take a Daedric Prince's gifts at face value. ;D

A catnip mouse? Just a mouse? How about stuffing a mattress full of catnip when J'Bari is scheduled to guard Valeria?!

As for the 'book', yes. That spell intends to properly alter 'plumbing', so to speak - in every way possible. Lusty Argonian Maid's writer's daughter seems to have inherited his...eccentricities.

I think the content of this chapter answers your question about Martin, though. It's pretty clear from the ending of Oblivion that Martin actually pays for the use of Akatosh's power with his life, but it's safe to say that he would still not be a Divine. That requires either mantling an existing deity, or achieving CHIM - which so far, only Tiber Septim has done.

Drunkle Qrow vs Sanguine? Better stock New Sheoth Palace's cellars!


	23. 22 - The Wager

Hunting Grimm in an abandoned urban setting did not lend itself well to fighting from the air. Despite demolishing several city blocks with fireballs in an attempt to destroy as many hiding spots as possible – and to give Durnehviir a clear flight path – the dragon simply moved too far and too fast. Many times she had a cluster of Grimm sighted, only for her mount to pass by too quickly for her to throw a fireball or a thunderbolt. Eventually, tiring of hitting nothing but rubble and crumbling buildings with her spells, she ordered Durnehviir to land.

And thus began the greatest hunt of the year, in which any surviving Grimm learned to never, _ever_ approach the ruins of Mountain Glenn again. For fear of a cat that threw fire, frost and lightning whichever way they went, demolishing entire buildings when it could not get to them.

"Charge!" she roared, ordering the dragon to charge through a mass of beowolves. A swing of her scythe sent a blade of blue energy whistling through the air, ripping apart the frontmost Grimm and those directly behind them. Those few that still remained standing were promptly devoured by the undead dragon as he passed. An ursa that dared approach too closely to Durnehviir's rear ended up being swatted skywards, causing the dark beast to howl in confusion as it was given a crash course in unpowered flight.

"Ah, _thuri_ , it has been too long since we have last enjoyed ourselves on the battlefield," rumbled Durnehviir happily as he crushed another beowolf under one of his feet, "The rush of blood, the thrill of the hunt, and the glory of the kill. This world possesses some fine hunting grounds to throw so many creatures our way,"

"Indeed, old friend," she chuckled, raising a hand and hurling a lightning bolt at an approaching overgrown nevermore, "It has been too long. Far, far too long. The blood runs strong in every _dovah_ , and my soul sings in joy at this wanton destruction,"

"Perhaps it is so, _thuri_. But you must mind the little _joorre_ that were following you,"

"There is no need to remind me. However, I must say that night is rapidly closing in upon us. Have you kept count of how many you have slain?"

"By my last count, I have struck down one hundred and five of these creatures,"

Valeria smiled smugly. There had to be no way that Team RWBY could have killed more Grimm than she and Durnehviir had. Especially when she herself had killed a vast, vast number of them.

"Excellent work, friend. Now, I must bid you goodbye for now, as I must join my students for the night. Perhaps another time, I shall summon you again," Valeria spoke, levitating off the dragon and landing on the cracked concrete sidewalk beside the dragon.

"Thank you for this opportunity to stretch my wings, _thuri_. May the next time come sooner, rather than later,"

And with that, the dragon vanished into nothingness, leaving behind only wisps of purple smoke. "Now, where did they say that they would meet me...?"

With a quick application of Aura Whisper, Valeria quickly found Team RWBY and Dr. Oobleck. The girls had decided to set up camp high in an abandoned building, where they believed that the Grimm could not reach them. When she emerged from a portal in their midst, the girls immediately jumped up from around the campfire that they had – and clamped their fingers to their noses.

"Eww. Archmage, you...uh...stink!" Ruby whined, backing away from her. She blinked twice, and then looked down at her armour. Despite having a saddle on Durnehviir to protect her legs and rear from his rather disgusting skin, she had failed to account for the fact that flapping his wings about had thoroughly coated her in decaying slime.

"Yeah...I think I don't want dinner now," Yang concurred, also backing away as far as she could. Blake and Weiss had rushed to the nearest balcony, retching and heaving out what was left of their lunches. Dr. Oobleck, luckily, was on watch; though given how Team RWBY reacted, he was glad that he was not at their side at the time.

Another portal opened up beside Valeria before she could respond. "OH! What's this? This isn't a camping trip? Wait, I see weapons. Weapons?! Ooh, how exciting! A hunting trip. It's a good thing Hircine isn't invited. The man would just spoil every single attempt at fun we might have with his wolves!"

"Mother? What are you doing here?" hissed Valeria, turning around only to bump her nose against Ra'shamarra's own.

"What am I doing here? What are YOU doing here?" giggled the elder khajiit. Her smile faltered, however, when she took a deep sniff, and her face contorted in disgust. "Sewage and morgues. My, now I know why your apprentice brought soap and deodorant! You should be ashamed of smelling like that! Except if you're planning to follow Namira. Which you aren't, are you? I couldn't STAND to think of having to invite that antisocial harlot to my revels!"

"I hate to interrupt, Archmage, but who exactly is this?" Dr. Oobleck spoke up.

"This," Valeria sighed, "Would be my _mother,_ "

"OF COURSE I'M YOUR MOTHER, YOU FOOL! Oh. Ooooh. You meant that for this mortal here, didn't you. Of course you did. Anyway, enough of that. You are coming with me-" Ra'shamarra said, pushing Valeria's hood down and pinching the tip of one ear. Ignoring her daughter's pained whines, she dragged her back through the portal by said ear, "-and you are going to get CLEANED UP! No daughter of mine is going to look like she's prepared for one of Namira's feasts!"

Her head popped through the portal again and she winked at Team RWBY.

"And you are as well! I've been looking forward to meeting you again, my little cookie destroyer – you and your friends. A feast of cookies awaits you! Right after a bath, of course,"

Ruby's eyes lit up with excitement as she heard cookies. Without warning, she seized the hands of the rest of her teammates and zoomed through the portal, leaving a confused Dr. Oobleck behind. By the time the man had recovered from his shock, the tip of Ruby's cloak had just whipped past him and into the portal.

"Wait, ladies. Allow me to accompany-" the portal closed in his face, "-you,"

* * *

After they had bathed and cleaned themselves up (especially Valeria), Team RWBY found themselves back in the dining hall of New Sheoth Palace for a meal. To their amusement, Roman Torchwick was still in a golden cage on the table, making the best impression he could of a candelabra. He sat cross-legged on the floor of his cage, as though he were in a meditative position; though his bowler hat was studded with a dozen candles, while in both his hands he held an actual candelabra containing half a dozen candles each. On seeing him, Ruby's face cycled through an amusing array of expressions; from shock, to pity, and then to laughter as the man's hair started to change colours rapidly.

"Alright, laugh it up, Red," groused Roman, "When I figure out how to get out of this infernal cage, I swear..."

"Ah-ah! Nobody gets out of the cage. Unless you're me! And I don't see any reason why I should be in a cage," Ra'shamarra laughed, waving her hand absent-mindedly, "Remember what happens to those that disagree with me, Roman! A smart mouth, a little disrespect...and I start to skip rope with you!"

"Alright, alright, I get it! I get it!" he quickly replied, shifting to become more comfortable in the cage that seemed to have shrunk a little.

"Auntie Sheo, I thought you said there were cookies?" Ruby asked, pouting. The Madgod took one look at her puppy face and grinned widely.

"Did I now? Ah, yes. A feast of cookies! Or was it a cookie of feasts? Ah, why do I even have to decide? One can always make both true at once, am I right? Of course I am right. I'm always right. Haskill, you level-headed bore! Tell the kitchens to bring their greatest creation yet!"

"As you wish, milady, and already done," he droned, motioning for the kitchen staff to come forward. Three argonian porters were crouched down underneath the weight of the gigantic silver platter that they were carrying on their backs, with another three tall nords at its edges to help them carry the monstrous serving dish. And when Ruby saw what was on top, she gasped in delight.

"Seeing as how much you liked my baked goods, my little cookie devourer," Ra'shamarra purred happily, "I had my cooks try to create a masterpiece. A delightful little meal, if I might say so myself!"

"Little?" Weiss murmured in disbelief, eyeing the gigantic piece of confectionery. It was an enormous cookie, seemingly formed of both white and dark chocolate in a spiral almost as wide as she was tall. On top of it were wads of glossy white-and-black chocolate drops – though to call them chocolate drops would be a gross understatement, as each one was perhaps a drop that would fit inside a large bucket – though one strangely appeared to be mottled black and white, and uncharacteristically fuzzy.

"OhmigoodnesscanIhaveabite?"

"Certainly, my little cookie destroyer. Though I would say that something else has had a bite before you have,"

The fuzzy chocolate drop uncurled itself with a happy bark. "Zwei!" yelped Ruby, catching the little corgi when it leaped out of the cake and into her arms, "Wait, how are you clean?"

"The Alteration spell to make items non-stick is not only for cookware!" laughed Ra'shamarra, who threw a glob of water onto Zwei. Sure enough, the water formed a rounded blob on the surface of his fur, which slid off almost as quickly as it had stuck.

"You know, this would really help in rainy weather," Yang hummed, running her fingers through her hair. Water and her hair did not get along well at all. "Rubes, can you learn that one for me?"

"Mmmph," she mumbled through a mouthful of cookie, "Mm...nuh-uh!"

"Manners, you dolt!" grumbled Weiss, closing her eyes in irritation at how uncouth her partner was behaving. Though maintaining that image soon became unimaginably difficult for the usually prim and proper heiress as the red-clad reaper held up a slice of cookie to her lips.

That, and she had her best impression of a puppy on. Which, with Zwei sitting in her lap with a piece of vanilla cookie in his mouth, only served to double the sheer cuteness that was radiating from her.

"Mmmph—" Ruby spoke, muffled by the cookie in her mouth before she swallowed, "Come on, Weiss, it's delicious!"

"Hmph. I suppose a taste wouldn't hurt," she sniffed, leaning forward and taking a dainty bite from the offered piece.

Her eyes widened as her tastebuds were assaulted by the divine taste of perfection in baked form, and she soon found herself devouring the offered cookies by Ruby with abandon. The balance of fragrant vanilla and delectable strawberries, the subtlety of the hints of almond chunks hidden inside the creamy yet somehow crumbly, buttery cookie – she doubted that even her father's best cooks could ever hope to match it.

"Ha! I knew that she couldn't resist my cooks' creations!"

"Are you sure you haven't laced them with anything?" Blake said suspiciously, eyeing how Weiss was literally devouring the cookies as quickly as Ruby did – and Yang as well, beside her.

"Well, there _may_ have been traces of refined greenmote in the previous batch. Always adds a kick to any flavour! And a dash of double vision," Ra'shamarra giggled. On seeing Blake's eyes narrow to slits briefly, she added, "But that was for me! I'm sure that my cooks are careful enough to clean their own utensils. After all, one does not want to eat a vanilla cake that was flavoured by clouds! Or was it clowns? No, must be clouds. Clowns don't taste particularly good,"

Blake swore that she saw Roman Torchwick twitch a little at that comment.

"Anyway! I'm far too amused by your antics to poison any of you, if that is what you want to know,"

Mildly reassured, Blake leaned back into her seat, though still carefully watching the rest of her team's abnormally voracious appetite. Valeria gave her a pointed look from across the table, motioning for her to take a bite of what was left of the giant cookie.

"Please be a good guest and eat what is provided for you, Miss Belladonna. As eccentric as my mother is, you know better than anyone else that she means no harm to any of you," the archmage said, her cheerfully airy voice holding an unspoken warning. Reluctantly, Blake took a piece of cookie from the plate and popped it into her mouth.

"As nice as seeing you all well fed is, I'm getting bored. Very bored. And a bored madgod is something that is not pleasant to see. If you ever see her at all, that is. I missed your hunt! Tell me how that went, hm?"

"The creatures of Grimm that we were present on the hunting grounds were of little challenge, mother. You would not be entertained by tales of such unworthy creatures," Valeria said dismissively. Turning to the girls, however, she smiled. "However, I have challenged my students to a wager, in an effort to make the hunt a little more interesting. Come now, ladies; how many Grimm did you slay? I and Durnehviir have brought down three hundred and forty Beowolves and Ursai before they fled the field,"

"Uh...Weiss, I think you were keeping score?" Yang mumbled through a mouthful of cookie. The heiress raised her head momentarily from the platter; Valeria chuckled a little as she at least had the decency to use a napkin to wipe clean her mouth – and most of her face – before speaking.

"By my last count, we were up to one thousand and three hundred Grimm between the four of us," she declared with a smirk, suppressing laughter when Valeria's jaw dropped in disbelief.

"I can hardly believe what you say, Miss Schnee. One thousand and three hundred Grimm, between the four of you? That is an absurd number of Beowolves and Ursai, if I might say so myself,"

"Who said that they were Beowolves and Ursai?" laughed Yang, "Archcat, you said that we were hunting Grimm. You didn't say what kind, so we went after the tiny little Nevermores and Creeps. Those still count towards our bet. You didn't say anything against those!"

Valeria groaned as she realised the loophole that she had forgotten to close in their initial agreement. Though she wanted nothing more than to call off the bet, she had no option but to honour it. After all, it _was_ her fault for challenging them to begin with, without properly examining the terms of said bet.

"Oh-ho~!" guffawed Ra'shamarra heartily. The elder khajiit had fallen off her throne and started to roll about on the carpet, clutching her stomach, drawing concerned stares from Team RWBY. "An agreement that was not properly drawn up is it, my daughter? Why, this amuses me. You're losing your touch! I simply must tell Clavicus next time we have a meeting of the Daedric Princes,"

Valeria looked about ready to burn a hole through the carpet. Such was the intensity of her glare at her mother, that even her ever-persistent grin seemed to fade a little.. "Fine," she groused stiffly, "I suppose that it was my fault for not checking what species of Grimm were present on the site. But for now, I assume that you have had your fill of cookies, Miss Rose? And you as well, Miss Schnee?"

"But Iph only phiniphed one phlice!" the little Rose choked out through a mouthful.

"Then you may take the rest home. Mother, these young ladies are on a field trip and a mission. They ought to learn what it means to take watch during the night, without you distracting them with these feasts of yours," she spoke. Picking up her staff, she conjured a return portal to their camp. "Well then, my students, we are leaving. Now, Miss Rose,"

"Aww," Ruby pouted, but otherwise swallowed down the piece she was chewing and grabbed another piece before skipping through the portal. "Bye, Auntie Ra'shamarra!" she called out from the other side. One by one, Weiss, Blake and Yang followed their leader – and much to Valeria's chagrin, each of them had quite a large chunk of cookie in one hand. But before Valeria could also follow, a small, plaintive bark caught her attention.

"Hm. I do believe that this is Miss Rose and Miss Xiao Long's pet," murmured Valeria, stooping down to run her fingers through the diminutive dog's fur, "I doubt that taking it along with us on our mission would be of any benefit. Mother, I assume that you are able to look after this dog until the young lady wishes to collect it?"

She grinned broadly at Zwei, who simply tilted his head in confusion. Oh, how she had plans for the little, amusing pet. "Of course, my daughter! What a ridiculous question. Now, didn't you say you had someplace to be? Well, go on, then. Ta-ta!"

* * *

At first, when Dr. Oobleck saw the portal close in front of his eyes, he thought that Valeria and Team RWBY had simply absconded from their mission. He was about to call in a Bullhead for extraction and call off the mission, when another portal burst open in front of his eyes. Tumbling out came Team RWBY, clutching on some rather out-of-place pieces of confectionery; and behind them came a fuming Valeria, whose death grip on her staff told of quite a bit of stress on the other side of the portal.

Though how confectionery and stress mixed together was still beyond him.

"Ah, there you are, ladies! I was about to call off the mission-"

"Stop," Valeria commanded, sighing as she clamped her hands over her ears, "Just...stop. Please. I wish to take a walk to clear my mind,"

She stalked off into the darkness, muttering something about 'cookies', 'mother', and 'irritating'. None of which made a lick of sense to the green-haired scholar. When she had rounded a corner and vanished into the darkness with a glowing dataslate in hand, he turned to face the rest of Team RWBY and asked, "So, who wants to start explaining what that was all about?"

"Oh, the Archcat's probably just a bit sore about losing a bet with us," Yang said, shrugging nonchalantly.

"As much as I disapprove of any sort of wagering on these desperate missions of life and death, I am curious as to _how_ you young ladies have managed to destroy more Grimm than a woman who levelled several city blocks on her own. Would you care to enlighten me?"

"Archmage Septim didn't specify what _kind_ of Grimm were counted. We killed many lesser Grimm while she went for the larger ones," Blake summarised for them all. Dr. Oobleck blinked once as he processed what Blake had just said, and then burst into amused laughter.

"Genius! Taking the path of least resistance so that you would be able to fulfil your objective in a most expedient manner!" he cried out loudly. Then, as soon as he calmed down – which was to say, nearly instantaneously – his face turned serious. "Now, speaking of the path of least resistance, the best thing to do at night is to get some rest. A huntress cannot fight properly against both Grimm and exhaustion at the same time, so unless any of you wish to find yourselves with some serious problems for our hunt tomorrow, I will suggest that you get some rest. I shall take first watch while I search for my colleague,"

And with that, Dr. Oobleck promptly sat down in front of the campfire and took a sip from his thermos. Ruby shared a confused glance with Weiss. Shouldn't a huntsman – or really, _anyone_ who was supposed to take watch – have a weapon with them? Regardless, the two of them shrugged it off as another one of Dr. Oobleck's eccentric behaviours. But as they looked around for a place to sleep, they realised that they had forgotten something critical, back in New Sheoth Palace.

"Um...so...uh..." Ruby stammered, looking around the camp, "How are we supposed to...you know, sleep?"

The answer to that was a sigh. "Well, ladies, I _did_ have five bedrolls before we left. But it seems that Valeria's excessive use of force has left us with only three. Unless Valeria has taught you how to somehow create additional bedrolls from nothing, then sharing is a necessity for this mission,"

"What happened to the other ones?"

"Let's just say that fire and cloth do not mix very well. I was only able to salvage two from the conflagration that she had created near our drop zone,"

* * *

While Blake and Yang were happy enough to share a bedroll, Ruby had found Weiss flatly refusing to share the remaining one with her. Something about 'personal space' and how she had found her 'adorability' to be 'insufferable', especially in such close contact. And so she decided that perhaps it would be better for her to take the second watch after Dr. Oobleck, seeing as then Weiss could sleep first on her own without Ruby.

"I wonder where Archmage Septim's gone?" Ruby whispered to herself. Dr. Oobleck had already returned to the camp, signalling the start of her watch, but Valeria was still out somewhere in Mountain Glenn. It had been hours since she had left with the dataslate in hand; and no matter how annoyed she had been at her mother, Valeria had never taken this long to cool herself off. Had she been ambushed by the White Fang? After all, they had been

Regardless, she had a duty to make sure that her teammates could have a good night's sleep without being attacked by Grimm; and so, she shook those thoughts out of her head and picked up her Crescent Rose and took up her watchpost behind the camp.

The night was nearly silent, with the lack of people around. She could only hear the faint crackle of the campfire behind her, the rest of the dead city being filled only by silent Grimm. How she wished she could have brought Zwei along from Ra'shamarra's palace before they had abruptly left. At least keeping watch wouldn't have been so dreadfully boring with the adorable dog around.

"Ugh, so...boring," she yawned, after another hour of watching nothing but the occasional skittish Beowolf walking around the destroyed city's streets. Peering down Crescent Rose's scope again, she gasped when she saw something that most definitely wasn't a Grimm.

It was a person. A White Fang agent, if the white Grimm mask was any indication. He gestured to somebody else around the corner, and another two agents came strolling out of the bushes on the other side of the street. And between them was what looked like a heavy steel box. Eyes narrowing, Ruby zoomed in with her rifle's scope on the box.

"Those are..." she murmured to herself in surprise. It had all-too-familiar glowing runes on its surface. "They're Archmage Septim's missing boxes!"

Too intrigued by her discovery, Ruby vaulted off the watchpost and landed with a soft thud on the streets below. She quietly crept to the street corner nearest to the White Fang, careful to make sure that the shattered moon cast as little light on her as possible. When she was satisfied that she could not hear the White Fang's footsteps any more, she peeked around the corner.

A pair of metal doors on the other side of the street had just slammed closed.

"That must be where they're hiding. This is it. This is it! Got to get the others-"

She stuck her hand into the pockets of her combat skirt, intending to pull out her scroll to call her teammates. However, before she could do so, she noticed that the ground beneath her was shaking. Loud cracking noises could be heard, and she could see a faint spiderweb of cracks starting to form in the asphalt at her feet. Panicking, she tried to dash away, swinging Crescent Rose in an effort to hurl herself away from the cracked asphalt.

Not that it worked. She shrieked in fear as the ground gave way completely and Crescent Rose slid out of her hands, embedding itself in the wall of a nearby building as she fell into the hole. Her fingers found the edge of the ledge. Gritting her teeth, she tried to pull herself up to the surface; but the crumbling asphalt simply broke into hundreds of tiny pieces under the strain.

Falling through the darkness, she bounced from wall to wall, until she eventually landed at the bottom of her cavern. Her aura had shielded her from most of the damage, but she still groaned in pain as she tried to stand. A nearby door burst open, revealing a pair of White Fang guards with their guns trained on her.

"Freeze!" they shouted. Ruby's eyes narrowed and she backed away; the White Fang continued to advance on her, until she found herself at the edge of a massive drop.

"You're a long way from home, little girl," one of them growled, swiftly grabbing her arm.

"Hey! Hands off!" she yelled, trying to jerk her arm free, to no avail. For her trouble, she received a solid punch to her face.

"I would suggest that you unhand my apprentice. Now," she heard an icy voice growl out.

Valeria was floating over the edge of the cliff. Her eyes were narrowed in fury, and there was a white-hot ball of sparks in her pistol's jaws. The White Fang grunts immediately pulled Ruby close, throwing her in front of himself as a human shield.

"You're not a human. Why are you defending her?" demanded the one holding Ruby.

"I do not have to answer to you, criminal scum. Unhand her, and perhaps I will show some mercy,"

The other one, that was not holding Ruby, was starting to falter. His faunus nose was literally screaming at him to flee as fast as he could from this woman. Or appease her by giving what she wanted. Whatever kind of faunus she was, her pheromones roared utter dominance; demanded utter submission. As though she were an alpha among alphas. But his colleague, whether through stupidity or having a blocked nose, insisted on holding on to the little human girl.

A girl that this alpha seemed to have taken a liking to.

"You have five seconds to comply," she spoke, her tone still glacial. The ball of lightning in the pistol grew larger; she flicked her thumb, and a laser dot appeared on the forehead of Ruby's captor.

"Four,"

"Three,"

"Perry, man, come off it," pleaded his partner, "Let the girl go, man. This isn't worth it,"

"Two,"

"One,"

A blinding white lightning bolt streaked out from the pistol and struck the man squarely in the head. He did not even have time to scream as his body disintegrated into a pile of smouldering ashes in a flash. Without another word, Valeria pointed her pistol at the other faunus, who had dropped his weapon and held up his hands in surrender.

"Hey, I didn't sign up for kidnapping. We can talk about this...right?" he said, trying to muster up as much courage as he could. Valeria, however, simply glared into his eyes coldly.

"There is no quarter for the blight that ruins this garden world," she growled, pressing the trigger on the pistol and vaporising him with another thunderbolt.

"Oh...Dust..." choked Ruby, watching in horror as Valeria killed two of the White Fang without so much as a second thought. It was in her defense; but that did not change the fact that she had _killed_ so casually. Even the one that had surrendered was not spared. How anyone could do that so remorselessly was beyond her. Her train of thought, however, was broken when she felt a firm hand grip her shoulder.

"Miss Rose. Have you lost your mind?" she heard Valeria growl angrily, "Your mission is with Dr. Oobleck. To exterminate Grimm on the surface, inside Mountain Glenn. Instead, you have chosen to pursue the White Fang! Without your teammates, no less!"

"I'm sorry!" she shouted back indignantly, "I mean, I couldn't just sit back and watch them take one of your boxes to Dust knows where,"

"And you thought that I was not aware of where exactly my belongings have gone? Did you not see the dataslate in my hands as I left the camp? I was already following them for the past few hours, and even infiltrated their base and discovered their plans. Had I not intervened here, you would have been in the enemy's hands. You, child, would do well to learn more restraint!" snarled Valeria, causing Ruby to quail and shrink into a quivering ball. Sighing, Valeria regathered her composure, though her lips were still drawn tight in frustration. "I had intended to perform this mission with as little bloodshed as possible, but now I am certain that the enemy present beneath the city is now well aware of our presence. The absence of patrols does not ever go unnoticed, no matter who you are fighting,"

She held out her hand and conjured an ethereal greatsword, tossing it at Ruby's feet. "And that means that we must destroy each and every last one of them to stop their nefarious plan,"

"Do we really need to do that? Kill them, I mean. Shouldn't we...just arrest them? Does this have something to do with J'Bari?"

Valeria sighed exasperatedly. Ruby was far too innocent for this, and yet her irritating desire to achieve some good seemed to bring her into situations that she should never see for another few years at least. "Yes, and yes. But whatever questions you may have, I shall answer later. For now, we must stop the White Fang from executing their plans. Every second that is wasted is a second that may be used to save the citizens of Vale!"

Ruby's eyes widened. "Vale?!" she gasped, jogging after the Archmage when she had dashed through the door that the two deceased White Fang had come through. "What's going on?"

"Miss Rose, do you not see the train tracks?" Valeria growled, throwing a ball of magelight at the ground. There, inside the tunnels in front of them, were a set of old and rusty train tracks. "All the Dust heists of the past few months. The experimental explosives that they had believed they had stolen from my alchemy laboratory. The attempted theft of my own requested Dust supplies, which had been purchased from the Schnee Dust Company. These were not for the ammunition of a military force. These were materials for sufficient explosives to level an entire city,"

Ruby's face paled at the implications. The Dust stolen must have amounted to hundreds of tons by now. If a single pound of Fire Dust was sufficient to blow a small crater into concrete, then hundreds of tons of Dust would create a truly catastrophic explosion. And they were standing on an ancient, but still serviceable, rail line.

Mountain Glenn was an extension of Vale.

Connected by an underground rail line.

And rail cars could carry massive amounts of cargo without problems.

* * *

A/N

Not much more to say here. Shiz is about to come down - hard!


	24. 23 - As a (Blunt) Scalpel

A loud explosion shook the ground and woke the sleeping team of huntresses-in-training with a start. Blake was the first to leap to her feet, clutching Gambol Shroud in hand as her eyes darted wildly to check for any Grimm coming closer.

"Yang? Weiss? Are you two up?" she called out to her teammates, who had likewise scrambled to their feet. Both the blonde and the white-haired heiress nodded their heads groggily.

"Dr. Oobleck? What's going on?" Yang mumbled, unfolding Ember Celica. Another loud explosion rocked the city, causing a nearby building to collapse. "Wow, what the hell is going on? That can't be good,"

The green-haired doctor in question cast a glance at the road below. There were numerous Grimm fleeing in terror from something. It did not matter what kind of Grimm it was; Nevermores, Beowolves, and even Ursai were fleeing as fast as they could move. And even more strangely, there were a few masked White Fang faunus scattered in among the Grimm with their hands over their heads, though the dark creatures paid them no attention at all.

"It appears we have a mystery on our hands! In all my years of observing Grimm, I have never seen them run from a fight," he commented; though on seeing a White Fang member get backhanded by an Ursa as both ran, he added, "Or refused to attack a human or faunus in close proximity. That hit was likely accidental,"

"Ruby's missing!" Blake called out from above them, having checked the watchpost for any sign of their team leader.

Yang paled in shock. "What?" she blurted out, "You're serious?"

"Yang, do I look like I'm joking?" Blake replied tersely, rolling her eyes, "Yes. Ruby isn't in the camp. I've looked,"

"Then it seems that we have a task ahead of us, ladies! We must find where our team leader has gone!" exclaimed Dr. Oobleck. He narrowed his eyes at the streets below, trying to find out more about what was happening; but as he did so, he spotted an all-too-familiar red object that was stuck to a nearby building. "And it appears that we have a lead! Let us- wait, what is that?"

Three narrow, intensely bright beams illuminated the night sky; pillars of light reaching down from as far up as the eye could see. Slowly they began to converge on a single point in the distance; in the open space that Valeria had carved out of the ruined city with her dragon earlier. A fourth beam joined the three as soon as they converged fully – and then, with a thunderous crack and a blinding flash, a powerful blast of energy shot to the earth from above. Such was the power of the blast that all of them were knocked to the ground by a wave of searing winds.

"My eyes! What the hell was that?" groaned Yang. When she regained a little of her vision, she noticed that Blake was curled up in a ball on the ground, whimpering as she clutched at her sensitive eyes. Weiss was slightly better off, having been behind a wall at the time, though by the way she was gawking at something, there had to be something terribly, terribly wrong.

"Well, I suppose that answers any questions as to what had happened to your sister," Dr. Oobleck muttered. The man stood up and pointed straight into the half-mile wide crater that had been burned into the ground by the energy blast, where a floating figure shrouded in white light was hurling bolts of lightning. "I shall have to speak with Valeria about the importance of maintaining the integrity of historical sites later. For now, if one of you could collect Miss Rose's weapon from the street, it will likely prove useful. I suspect that she and Valeria have a hand in this!"

The team nodded and leapt off the building and onto the ground below. Yang snatched up Ruby's Crescent Rose from its resting place in a nearby wall as she left.

* * *

"Fire control, there was far too little power in that shot. The rail line is still intact," Valeria growled, "Abort all further fire missions. Additional bombardment has too high a risk of collateral damage,"

Ruby gaped as she saw the destruction in front of her. The railway had to be at least twenty metres down from ground level, protected by layers of concrete and rock – and yet, a single shot had stripped all that away. She could see the broken moon from what was once deep underground; and judging by the slack-jawed expressions on the rest of the White Fang in the underground rail terminal, she was not the only one that was shocked.

"Confirmed order, Your Majesty. The _Wrath of Talos_ is standing down," the operator on the other side spoke.

"Prepare a ground assault team for contingency purposes if this mission fails. Ready the Sixth Legion for deployment in case damage control is required in Vale,"

"Acknowledged. Sixth Legion standing by,"

Valeria exhaled as she slapped the dataslate on her hip, terminating its connection to her flagship. "I had dearly hoped that I could terminate this insurgency with a single, silent strike, but it is evident that will not be the case. If the enemy was unaware of our presence before, they are well aware now. It is likely that they will set the train on its way soon,"

"Then we have to stop them!" cried out the young girl, who gripped the conjured greatsword tighter.

"Archcat! Rubes!" called out Yang from well above them. The rest of Team RWBY – and Dr. Oobleck – landed near them with loud thumps. "You're both safe! What's going on?"

"It seems that I have discovered what the White Fang were planning with the Dust that had been stolen over the past few months," Valeria said grimly, "So I had taken it upon myself to destroy their operations. Or rather, attempted to,"

"By destroying half of Mountain Glenn?" Dr. Oobleck said incredulously.

"You may thank Miss Rose for forcing myself to use my warship to destroy half the city," sighed the archmage, who cast an annoyed glance at Ruby, "After all, if she had not been curious enough to stalk a few White Fang members on the surface, I would have killed every last one of them before they could act,"

It was then Blake's turn to be horrified. "Killed them? They're misguided faunus! You can't just kill them-"

"I can, and I will, if it means saving many more lives than I would take," replied Valeria coldly, "They plan to move this train under the Kingdom of Vale, and detonate it beneath the busiest section of the city. The resulting explosion would kill thousands of innocents, and likely cause a security breach in the city perimeter that would be impossible to fill. The destruction of an entire kingdom, or a large part of it, is an unacceptable outcome. Subduing them without killing would take far too long, and time is something that is not on our side. Especially not when they are now alerted to our presence,"

She lifted up her pistol and fired a blinding white beam at an oncoming group of White Fang soldiers. They did not even utter a single sound before they were erased from existence, reduced to piles of smoking white ashes. "Now if you will assist me with preventing the deaths of thousands of innocents, I would greatly appreciate it,"

A brief moment of tense silence followed those words. Team RWBY – and Dr. Oobleck – looked at Valeria with a mix of fear and revulsion. How could someone so casually speak of killing dozens, if not hundreds, of faunus? Even if they were misguided and sought to kill as many humans as possible in Vale, didn't everyone deserve a second chance?

"We'll help, but I'm going to ask for something," grumbled Blake, "You said that if we win the bet earlier, each of us can have a wish. I'm asking for you to not kill any more of these faunus. Just...knock them out,"

Growling in frustration, Valeria otherwise nodded stiffly. "That is a wish that I do not appreciate granting, Miss Belladonna. But I have given my word, and I will honour it, even if the outcome is...less than desirable. Do know that if they escape and attempt another attack in the future, the blood they spill is in your hands,"

Blake nodded, wondering what she had meant by that. But for now, they had a horde of faunus to subdue – and a train loaded with highly unstable Dust explosives to stop.

* * *

"My daughter is one rude girl, isn't she? Leaving a feast so suddenly! And with my other guests too!" cooed Ra'shamarra to the corgi in her lap. She was running her fingers through Zwei's fur, while the dog in question barked happily every time she scratched behind his ears, "And you know it! You know it, don't you, boy? You're one smart dog, that likes to listen to the Madgod, aren't you? Why, yes, I know that you like being spoken to. As does everyone else. They all listen to me!"

"Except your daughter, milady," coughed her smirking seneschal. The manic grin immediately vanished from Ra'shamarra's face.

"Yes. Except my daughter. Buuuuut...we will simply have to fix that!"

She held out her hand, and Wabbajack flew from its mount above the dining hall's fireplace and into her palm.

"Come, Haskill! Let's make her listen!"

* * *

Valeria's day was changing from bad to worse. She had to honour her agreement with Blake, and so she had to refrain from throwing spells that could be lethal. While paralysis spells and conjured chains and ropes worked to restrain one or two targets, restraining dozens to hundreds of targets was a different matter entirely. Simply put, Destruction spells were far more lenient on the mental capacity of its caster; after all, they did not require the user to maintain mental tabs on what each target was supposed to be feeling.

Which proved to be infinitely vexing for Valeria. Despite centuries of practice of casting various illusion spells, she found dividing her attention between many targets a truly bothersome task. Why bother incapacitating so many useless underlings when one could simply be rid of them forever?

"Archmage Septim! They're getting into the train!" yelled out Ruby, who was busy shooting those that were fleeing with Ice Dust rounds.

She cursed under her breath as she saw two people climb into the train's engine carriage – a pink-and-white dressed woman and a masked red-haired male. With a loud groan, the train began to shift slightly. Its rusting wheels started to turn; sparks shot out as ancient brakes broke under the strain of its engines beginning to shift its enormous bulk forwards.

"Getting into the train? To leave for where, I wonder, hm?" said a giggling voice from behind her, accompanied by the tearing noise of a portal appearing.

"Mother. This is neither the time nor place for jests," she hissed. That was one person she hoped to _not_ encounter again that night.

"Auntie Ra'shamarra!" cried out Ruby happily, "Could you help us? We need to take out all of these bad men and women before they do something really, really bad to Vale!"

The elder khajiit took one look at the train before her face split into a wide, wide grin. "A battle! Why, my little cookie monster, I did not think that you would be one for such rowdy parties! This is one that even randy old Sanguine wouldn't touch. But as you're asking sooooo nicely, I suppose I'll help. By turning this into a SLUMBER PARTY!"

Flicking her hand out, she sent out a rolling cloud of garish neon-pink smoke from her palm, covering the entire battlefield in a haze. Every White Fang soldier that was still standing in the open started to sway unsteadily on their feet, before eventually falling to the ground, snoring.

Sleeping gas. An invention of Vaermina's, adapted for her use. Valeria growled in frustration. Why did she resort to a magicka-intensive and mind-exhausting series of paralysis and binding spells when she could have simply put them all to sleep? Sometimes it was frustratingly difficult to tell whether her mother was simply a madwoman, or a veritable genius.

"Well. That was a very elegant solution. Sleeping gas! A most unique semblance indeed!" Dr. Oobleck exclaimed, noting that the chaos of the battlefield had mostly descended into silence.

Mostly.

The dull thudding and grinding of the train engine stirred them from their daze. "The train's still moving!"

"And we can't reach it because of the sleeping gas. How do we stop it?" Blake added in horror, her bow drooping.

"It's a train. Trains move! That is what they do, correct?" Ra'shamarra laughed, waving her hand absent-mindedly, "Why would one even want to stop it?"

"Mother. That train is loaded with thousands of tons of highly explosive Dust,"

"Exploding dust? Very odd. Last I checked, my palace did not explode when the maids did not clean. So why would a very dirty train explode?"

"Dust is an explosive compound only found in Remnant,"

"Oh. Oooooh. I see. Or not! I still don't see a reason why a train shouldn't be allowed to move around explosives. After all, when it goes boom, it's a giant firework! And mortals do love their fireworks. You have tried it before, have you not? You really should!"

Team RWBY gawked at Ra'shamarra's strange – and rather disturbing - statement, while Valeria filed that away as something to discuss they met under better circumstances. Which was to say, quite some time away.

"I will pretend that I did not hear that, mother. But for now, stopping that train is our highest priority. Ordinarily, a powerful fireball would do the trick, but detonating several thousand tons of explosives in a narrow tunnel is hardly the best of ideas. Might you have any suggestions?"

"Suggestions? Oh, ideas! Of course I'm full of ideas, you silly little kitten! After all, madness is only genius touched by overwhelming inspiration!" cried out Ra'shamarra, clapping a hand to her chest in feigned shock. "As the Wabbajack can prove! One should be aware of the fact that cats-" she shot a ball of red energy at a cat faunus on the ground, causing him to sprout a rat's tail, "-can be rats, can be hats-" she shot another bolt of red, this time dropping a bowler hat on top of him that looked eerily like something Torchwick would have worn, "-can be thises and can be thats! Trains can be brains-"

"NO! EWW, GROSS, NO!"

"...Okay then. Trains can be rains," she shot another bolt at the rearmost carriage, turning it into a miniature raincloud, "can be...oh, you know what? Forget it! I want...a duck. A mother duck. With lots of cute, fluffy, tasty little chickies behind her. Hmm...care to donate?"

As she said that, she hurled an enormous red bolt from her staff that enveloped the entire train, from back to front. For a moment, the train slowed and stopped; it glowed an eerie blue, before vanishing in a puff of smoke along with the pink cloud of sleeping gas. A plaintive, disgruntled quack came from where it once was; and when Ruby threw a ball of magelight into the now-empty tunnel, she squealed in delight when she saw a decidedly confused mother duck with a flock of little yellow ducklings behind her, standing on the middle of the train tracks.

"...Mother, I know how that staff works," Valeria murmured, frowning, "It substitutes items from another location in a given material plane. Should I be concerned about where that raincloud has come from? Or where these ducks have come from?"

Ra'shamarra hummed in thought for a moment, before shrugging her shoulders with a broad grin on her face. "Don't worry, be happy! After all, it's no longer YOUR problem, is it?"

Somehow, that answer gave her very little reassurance...

* * *

A/N:

Sometimes, there is method to her madness! And in madness, lies a solution.

Quintain: Lol, I can actually see that happening xD Mordin. Mordin everywhere. Now if only Oobleck and Mordin were in the same room...

Kalomin: More as a matter of protocol than anything - and a way to see if fear can leverage the White Fang to let go of Ruby first before she would shoot them dead. It makes for a much easier negotiation if her opponent has nothing to bargain with except their lives. That, and it's much easier to shoot a spell at a target without a human shield.

Dragonman: Well, it's likely possible - but more likely that she would transform into a Vampire Lord and start throwing lifedrain blasts everywhere. Considering that she's deliberately restraining herself from drinking the blood of her subjects, drinking the blood of those who are _not_ her subjects would probably be too great a temptation to risk.

Playwars5: Somehow, I don't think a bomb weighing 20,000 tons could be considered anything less than a superweapon xD I mean, it's not like you could classify a train-mounted bomb an IED XD


	25. 24 - Winds of Change

"Breaking news. A large explosion has been reported last night in the vicinity of Mountain Glenn. Eyewitness reports from huntsmen and huntresses first responding to concerns about a potential Grimm invasion indicate that a large section of Mountain Glenn about half a mile wide has been completely obliterated, and that there was a notable total absence of Grimm in a large radius around the site of the explosion. Rumour from night owls in town has it that they saw a 'blinding white light' coming down from the sky before the explosion. Vale Council and Atlas have been contacted for comments as to what could have caused this level of destruction, but they have so far refused to comment. Back to you, Cyril,"

"Thank you, Lisa. Now, on other news. A farmer expanding a dam on the outskirts of Patch has reportedly been hospitalised after an entire train car filled with high-grade Dust fell from the sky and promptly exploded. Whether this was an elaborate hoax, or an illegal and highly dangerous use of Dust, we will never know; but experts suggest that the crater left where the dam once was is certainly larger than what could be expected of a single train car's worth of refined Dust. The case is certainly a mind-boggling mystery, and police that are investigating this are thoroughly stumped. And now, for weather..."

Yang clicked off the television in the students' common room, where the rest of Teams RWBY and JNPR had decided to hang out. They looked at each other awkwardly; Ruby wanted to tell them all about what had happened in Mountain Glenn, but Valeria had said to not breathe a single word about it until she said otherwise. Something about 'sensitive information' and 'only for those that need to know'.

One thing for sure, however, was the fact that Valeria was definitely under quite a lot of scrutiny now. Her classes had all been suspended for the time being; the outdoor amphitheatre had been locked down under a triple-layered energy shield, as was the alchemy laboratory on Beacon Academy's rooftop. A large crate of alocasia fruit had been fortunately left out for the students who took some every morning from the labs for breakfast, giving them no reason to even attempt to break into the heavily warded room.

"So...did you guys find something really nasty on your mission or something?" Jaune asked, breaking the ice.

"I can't tell you, Jaune. Archcat said that we shouldn't say anything about it at all, and she's not someone that I want to make angry," Yang replied slowly, shuddering at the memories of the level of destruction that Valeria had wreaked on the White Fang forces. Ruby had been worst affected, seeing as Valeria had to kill the faunus who was holding her hostage; but she had recovered well after Ra'shamarra visited them at night and spent some time playing with her. That, and an offering of divinely-delicious cookies had also helped. As did seeing Zwei in a harlequin jester's costume, decorated with dozens of golden bells.

"Hm. If you say so. Say, I think I saw her earlier going to Ozpin's office again. Wonder what they're discussing this time?"

* * *

"Valeria,"

"Ozpin. And I see that you have invited half of Vale's council to your office...and General Ironwood as well," Valeria said smoothly, surveying the people gathered in front of her, "May I assume that this meeting is to do with what has transpired in Mountain Glenn last night?"

"That...would be correct," replied the headmaster, who took a sip from his mug of coffee, "Though the news crews report that they are not aware of what has caused the destruction of half of Mountain Glenn, we on the Council of Vale are aware that your ship was the only vehicle capable of that level of destruction in Remnant. While I am sure that you have your reasons for firing very close to the actual present borders of Vale, the rest of the council is not so easily convinced. They want to know why exactly have you fired such a highly destructive weapon so close to their borders. Close enough that anyone at night could have seen it for many miles around,"

"Indeed. You have no idea how much unrest you have caused," the man in a suit beside him spoke angrily, glaring at a stony-faced Valeria, "People are running scared, and the rumour mills are going into overdrive about some conspiracy theory or another. Just last night, we've had more calls to Vale's police department than we have had in _years_. Years! Do you know how much trouble this would cause for our city's defenses?!"

Ozpin took another sip, and added, "And I am sure that your apprentice has relayed to you her notes from Peter's Grimm Studies classes. Negative emotions attract Grimm, and what you have done there could have well triggered a mass panic in the city,"

"Perhaps then you should consider yourselves lucky that there was not a mass panic, and that my dreadnought's orbital bombardment has only nearly triggered one," Valeria replied, her face still betraying no emotion, "After all, I would daresay that twenty thousand tons of refined Dust munitions detonating in the railway tunnels beneath Vale would have had far worse consequences,"

Murmurs echoed around the room as the councillors whispered to each other in disbelief. "Do you have any proof of this?" one of them asked.

"As a matter of fact, yes, I do indeed. I believe that approximately a hundred White Fang members are now languishing inside my dreadnought's prison cells, awaiting their execution or release. A few that I have...interrogated...have testified to plotting against Vale, and conspiring to commit mass murder. They have also been complicit in the Dust thefts over the past few months. Something which I believe has been made quite clear, given the testimony of Roman Torchwick,"

"What testimony? What are you talking about?" another council member blurted out, prompting both Ozpin and Ironwood to stiffen.

Valeria's eyes narrowed on the two. "There was an attack on Vale harbour by White Fang members, targeting a shipment of Dust that I had ordered. Roman Torchwick was captured in the battle that ensued, along with approximately thirty White Fang criminals. Torchwick's interrogation yielded much information regarding the numerous caches of stolen Dust; the summary of which I have forwarded to both Professor Ozpin and General Ironwood," she spoke calmly, though a fine sheet of frost was starting to form on the floor around her, "Though by your surprised reaction, it appears that none of you have been informed of this matter. Is there a reason for this disinformation, Professor Ozpin?"

The man, to his credit, remained mostly calm as he answered. "I had believed that perhaps with their partner arrested, the White Fang would remain dormant for some time. Thus, I believed that it was likely better to keep this quiet until a time that we could safely retrieve the Dust, rather than risk a panic attack by mobilising military forces,"

"A terrible mistake, as you have now found out. Casting an issue into a corner and draping a veil over it merely hides the issue, not solve it,"

"That still doesn't excuse firing a weapon of mass destruction so close to the Kingdom of Vale!" the suited councillor shouted, crossing his arms, "We allowed you to teach in Beacon Academy due to Ozpin's recommendations. This was when we first became aware of your existence when that ship of yours suddenly appeared above Vale. At the time, we believed that perhaps your mission was benign, and that you weren't out to conquer us. Now? I'm not so sure any more,"

"Then perhaps it is best that I take my leave," Valeria said icily, turning around and walking back towards the elevator, "If my presence offends your sensibilities, then parting ways before we come to blows would be best for everyone. My students can continue to learn on their own; they do not require my guidance any more, as they have proven themselves more than mere novices of the Art; and I have neglected matters of state for far too long,"

But before she entered the elevator, she looked over her shoulder and glared at Ozpin. "As for you, Professor Ozpin, I shall give you one piece of wisdom hard-won through centuries of ruling. Peace is merely an illusion; it is merely a ceasefire before the next war. Whether you choose to strengthen your arms until the next inevitable conflict is up to you, but I can assure you that the victor of any conflict is one that never remains idle in times of peace. And you have an enemy at your doorstep; an enemy within, one that lurks in the shadows. See to it that you do not become the vanquished,"

"Are you- the nerve! Are you threatening us, in our own kingdom!?" growled one of the councillors indignantly.

"No. I am merely giving you advice. Your kingdom holds neither strategic nor economic value to my Empire, and a planet overrun by hostile wildlife is not one that I would settle without resculpting the entire world in a manner that I would find pleasing. Now, if that is all, I bid you all good day,"

* * *

"Hey, guys...it looks like Archmage Septim's class is back on," Ruby said, flicking through her scroll when a notification pinged on it.

"Yeah. It has. But why are the rest of the classes still cancelled?" asked Blake, "And not just for this week. Look, it's every single class from now until the end of the year,"

"I hope nothing bad's happening. I mean, I liked Archcat's classes. At least we're learning something _useful_ , not like listening to Professor Poop talk about himself for days on end,"

A round of sniggers came from Blake and Ruby as they recalled Ruby's stick figure drawing in that one memorable class with the portly old huntsman professor.

"Well, let's go then," Weiss sighed, shaking her head in disapproval of her teammates' antics, "Class is in five minutes,"

When they arrived at the usual door leading up to the rooftop alchemy laboratory, they had found a gaggle of students gathered around the doorway. Mostly exchange students.

"Excuse me? We're going to be late for class! Coming through, coming through!" Yang cried out, parting the crowd for the rest of the team. By the time they got to the front of the crowd, they noticed that there was a Vacuan exchange student crumpled on the floor in pain. Most of the skin on one of his arms was a brilliant vermilion, looking as though he had dunked it into a pot of scalding water; and yet, it was encased in a thick slab of ice. Given how he was also twitching uncontrollably from time to time, maybe he had even been struck by a powerful electric shock. "What the hell?"

"Wait, you guys are Beacon students, right?" an Atlesian student asked, "We were thinking of dropping in to see what's in this class, but the door's been...well, you can see what happened to Dusty over there,"

There were three layers of shields placed in front of the doorway; a brilliant green one, a bright red, and an electric blue one. And nailed to the wall beside it by an icy spike that absolutely refused to melt was a note, written in Daedric.

"Oooh. What does it say?" Ruby asked, scratching her head. Weiss was muttering under her breath as she deciphered the message. "Come on, Weissy!"

"Oh, be quiet, you dolt! I'm trying to remember what this symbol is!" she replied sharply. After a few more moments, she pursed her lips and crossed her arms, "Well, the bad news is that the shield isn't coming down. As in, it's permanently there. The good news, for some of us at least, is that it's selective,"

To the surprised gasps of everyone, Weiss put her hand into the shield and moved it from side to side without any apparent harm. "It doesn't affect anyone that it's keyed to. And according to the note, that's any student that's been with Archmage Septim for the last few months,"

"She can't do that! We're exchange students here, we're supposed to be given the same choice of subjects as the others from Beacon Academy!" an exchange student exclaimed angrily, echoed by several murmurs of assent. All, however, were silenced when a dreadful winter chill fell over the air. The student that said it was grasping at his throat as he was lifted up into the air by an unseen force; and then he was thrown clear across the hallway to the other end.

"I will do as I please, young man," Valeria growled irritably, "Especially since of today, I am no longer a teacher at Beacon Academy, due to matters beyond my control. I have been given one last class to set my affairs in order, and then I must leave,"

"Archmage Septim!" gasped Ruby, "Does this mean that you won't be teaching us any more?"

"I will explain everything inside the class. You are the last of my students that have arrived; the rest of your colleagues are already inside. Go on,"

Ruby noticed that there were portal runes on the edge of the doorway. And judging by Weiss' raised eyebrow, she had likely noticed as well. Nevertheless, they continued on as Valeria was prodding them on with an invisible force.

What greeted them on the inside was incredible, to say the least. No longer was there an alchemy laboratory on the rooftop. They were inside a hangar of some sort, and the rest of the class were seated on a number of metal benches to one side. Various holographic training dummies had been set up all over the cavernous room; from lumbering mammoths to tiny, zippy little birds.

Pyrrha waved to them, motioning for them to sit beside Team JNPR.

"Please sit," Valeria said curtly, pacing in front of them with a staff clasped behind her back, "Now, I have no illusions that none of you are unaware of the events that has transpired in Mountain Glenn two nights ago. You would have likely seen my dreadnought fire a shot from space to ground, in what is likely the first orbital bombardment that you have ever seen – and that I hope Remnant will ever see. However, it was a true necessity to perform such an action. Had I not done so, half of Vale would have likely been destroyed by the detonation of twenty thousand tons of high-grade Dust, packed into a train,"

"That's a lot of Dust. Did the White Fang really steal that much?" one of them asked.

"No. Not entirely, at least. I am certain you have all heard of one Roman Torchwick, who has been implicated in a string of Dust robberies over the last six months. Every single scrap that has been stolen has gone towards the creation of that monstrous train-mounted bomb, I would surmise. The White Fang were merely the ones to deliver the bomb to its target, via the underground rail network running beneath Vale. The details are no longer relevant, as the perpetrators are all in custody. However, what is important is what must happen in the future,"

She continued to pace in front of them, her lips drawn so tightly that they were almost lines. "As you should now be aware, I am no longer welcome in Vale. The orbital bombardment has caused quite significant outrage among the members of Vale's council, and they have called for myself to be removed from Beacon Academy. Which, in the interest of preserving peace, I have complied,"

Yang tilted her head. "Wait, wait, wait. So you're _really_ not teaching us any more?"

Valeria gave her a wry smile. "They merely said that I was to be removed from Beacon Academy's grounds, and that I could no longer teach at Beacon Academy or visit Vale. Not that I could not teach at all, Miss Xiao Long. I am, after all, the Archmage of the Imperial City's Arcane University, as well as the ruling monarch of a sovereign nation. Thus, I can continue teaching you, regardless of what Vale's council may have to say. The portal to my alchemy laboratory is a portal to one of the _Wrath of Talos'_ hangars,"

"Yay! So you're still going to teach us?" Ruby cheered, jumping up from her seat, "Is J'Bari coming back? Is she alright again?"

"Unofficially, yes. I will still teach you; it would be most improper for a teacher to leave her students before their all of their curiosity is satisfied. Officially, I am no longer on Remnant, and thus cannot possibly be a teacher at Beacon. And, if you meant whether J'Bari may return to Beacon Academy with you, I am afraid that J'Bari is, like myself, not welcome in Vale any longer. However, should you wish to visit her, feel free to come and ask one of the Legion soldiers if you could see her. She is certainly hale and healthy now,"

Valeria turned around when a red-cloaked soldier tapped her on the shoulder and passed her a dataslate. Grumbling a little after quickly reading it, she nevertheless pocketed the device and turned back to the class.

"Very well. Thank you for relaying this information to me. Miss Schnee, if I could borrow you for a moment after class to discuss business matters, I would greatly appreciate it. Now, as you are officially no longer students of mine, I would ask you all to take good care of the study materials provided. I will not be able to provide any replacements until Remnant stands unified and I may request the College of Archmages to appoint an Archmage of Remnant,"

Weiss perked up on hearing this. "There are more archmages out there?" she said in awe.

"Indeed there are, Miss Schnee. I am simply the first and foremost among them. Nirn itself is a special case, having nine archmages. But as for the others, the other planets have only one. Until Remnant can prove that it stands under a single flag, I am unable to request the Mages' Guild to establish a branch on Remnant. I must ask; why do you ask this?"

"Oh...nothing," she replied innocently, though her fingers were twitching excitedly. Valeria smirked, knowing the Schnee heiress' endless ambition.

"Well, perhaps one day, one of you may become the first archmage of Remnant. But that day is neither here, nor close by. There is a growing darkness in Remnant, one that I fear your headmaster is hiding from the rest of the world,"

"Professor Ozpin wouldn't do that..." Jaune cried out, though he quailed when Valeria cast a stern glance at him, "...uh, he wouldn't...would he? He seems like such a nice guy,"

"I should suggest that you ask yourself that, Mr. Arc. Those who appear to do no wrong often hold the darkest of secrets," replied Valeria darkly, "Question everything you see, for nothing is true until you are certain for yourself that it must be. I know not what this darkness is; only that it involves the White Fang, from what I have been able to ascertain from interrogating their captured members,"

"I knew it! The faunus scum are at trying to get us all killed again!" shouted one of the less tolerant members of the class, echoed by a few others that held the same sentiments.

" **IIZ SLEN NUS!** " roared Valeria angrily, encasing him – and half the hangar floor – in a solid glacier. "No. The enemy is not the faunus. You are all brothers and sisters in arms, training to become the shield and the sword of civilised life on Remnant. Stand by their side, or not at all. The choice is yours, and it is simple,"

She breathed in deeply and closed her eyes. "Aside from letting you all know of the new location of your magickal classes, I wish to let you know that unlike any location in Remnant, the Empire never sleeps. You may come here at any time of day or night to practice, either on your own or with friends. If I am not present, feel free to ask one of the Legion battlemages present. They are those wearing blue cloaks, and will be pleased to assist you with your questions. Other than that, I implore you all to remain cautious. Not all on Remnant is as well as it appears to be. Class...dismissed. You may return to Beacon Academy, or you may remain behind to explore this room; the choice is yours. Miss Schnee, if I could have a word with you?"

The glacier shattered and melted away as if it wasn't there, releasing the trapped class member. Grumbling, the boy picked himself up and limped towards the portal. Others slowly trickled out through the portal again, though a few remained behind to talk to the various Legion battlemages scattered around the hangar. Weiss, however, approached Valeria, wondering what she had to say.

"No, Miss Rose. What I am about to discuss with Miss Schnee is for her ears only," Valeria said, lifting a hand when Ruby followed Weiss. She cast a black shrouding sphere around herself and Weiss, as well as a strong muffling glamour, ensuring that nobody other than themselves could hear each other.

"So, Archmage Septim, what did you need to discuss?" Weiss asked, trying her best to act businesslike.

"The preliminary results of my Legion's experiments on Dust crystals have come back, and are promising," she chuckled, smiling broadly.

"Oh? Please, do continue,"

"Well, let us begin from the basics. Have you conjured a Fire Atronach yet, Miss Schnee?"

She nodded slowly. The flaming creature was difficult to control, having an unruly mind that was wild and hot-tempered; it took a large amount of effort on her part to stop it from rampaging, and yet she could not deny its effectiveness against Beowolves. Due to the firestorm that continually surrounded them, they proved to be untouchable by anything that could not attack at range.

"Very good. Then you will know of the difficulty of binding it to your will, even as an intermediate caster. They are not the most compliant of all atronachs, though they do require the least effort for the initial binding,"

"Yeah, they weren't that much more difficult to summon than wolf familiars,"

"As they always have been. However, if there is one thing that must be said, it is that the hordes of Oblivion are endless in number. For centuries, the Mages' Guild have laboured to find a way to safely bind them to objects, so that they may act as guards around locations; and the last shipment of Dust has finally allowed us enough insight to break that puzzle for good,"

"You mean...?" Weiss gasped, realising the implications of what she had just heard. Valeria smiled, and produced a flat disk-like object of polished silver, with a single glowing Fire Dust crystal embedded in its centre. Pressing on the crystal once conjured a flame atronach with a burst of flames; and with another press, the creature vanished as suddenly as it had come.

"This is the very first of its kind, Miss Schnee. An atronach anchor, if you require a name. A permanent way to bind these elemental guardians to the material plane," spoke Valeria proudly, "At first, I had believed that this breakthrough was a gain for our armed forces. However, after seeing the plight of your world, I believe that it could be put to a greater purpose. Tell me, Miss Schnee; why have you chosen to become a huntress?"

"I...uh, I chose to become a huntress because I had to. I'm a Schnee. It's expected that I honour my family,"

"So, duty, then? To your family. It is a...honourable enough goal. However, what if I told you that you have here the means of ending the Grimm threat once and for all?"

"What?"

"Let me simplify the situation. Currently, as I understand, all civilisation on Remnant must rely upon the work of huntsmen and huntresses to eradicate Grimm in order to survive. However, that which has already been cleared would eventually be overrun once more by the Grimm that have not been slain. What if we were to post guards where the Grimm had been eliminated?"

"Guards that...don't need to eat or sleep...or be paid...or even risk their lives," breathed Weiss, looking hungrily at the disk. This was larger than what she had ever imagined. If those could be mass-produced, they would never have to worry about a Grimm attack ever again. Even in outlying, far-flung villages.

Valeria nodded, but then pocketed the disk. "If I were to mass-produce it, I could ask the Imperial manufactories to do so. However, what then? If I were to hand these to Atlas, to Vale, to Vacuo and Mistral, they would surely be able to eradicate the Grimm by simply dispensing these disks where they could,"

"Yes. The Grimm wouldn't be a threat any more! But...I'm sensing that there's a 'but' in there somewhere?"

"Indeed, there is. You are, of course, well aware of the way that men covet wealth and power over all else, do you not? Distributing these to the four kingdoms would simply trigger a world war as each would seek to conquer the others for domination. In the end, they are their own worst enemies, never content with what they have. What is truly required is someone that would take power not for its own sake, but for their fellows who do not. Someone like a huntsman, or a huntress,"

"Are you suggesting that _I_ take control of Atlas – and then the rest of the world? That's absurd!" Weiss gagged, nearly falling over in shock from the sheer absurdity of the statement, "I mean, the Schnee Dust Company may be the most influential and powerful of Remnant's businesses, but we don't exactly have the clout to take control of a government, let alone _all_ of them!"

Valeria frowned. "Then perhaps I was wrong about you, Miss Schnee. If one does not believe they can change the world, then it shall never be so,"

She waved her hand and the dark sphere vanished, along with the muffling field. "Our discussion here is over, Miss Schnee. Should you change your mind, I shall be waiting. Oh, and one more thing,"

She leaned closer, so that their noses were almost touching. "I have not forgotten your promise that you would speak to your father regarding the ill-treatment of his faunus labourers. See to it that I receive an answer soon, or I shall visit him myself,"

* * *

A/N

So, the die is cast. Valeria faces the repercussions of ordering an orbital strike too close to a city, and a certain all-business-owning old man received a free expansion to his dam. The White Fang have taken quite a few blows so far, and Cinder is likely getting more than a little nervous. Or not. After all, if her plan was to cause mass panic in Vale, Valeria's done a very damn good job of it herself with her dreadnought. Move over, Season 2 material; it's time for Season 3 (and to make poop hit the proverbial fan!)

Quintain:

Chibi chapter might be appropriate for that meeting xD

ArtyomXIII:

Yup, pretty much! It's a giant directed-energy weapon capable of destroying asteroids in a single hit.


	26. 25 - Thus Kindly, I Gather

Much to Professor Ozpin's chagrin, the portal to the rooftop proved to be extremely stubborn when it came to removing it. They had tried everything; burning it, burying it under a ton of bricks, shooting it, even throwing a demolition ball at it with Professor Goodwitch's telekinesis. Yet the portal still remained behind its triple layer of shields, only accessible to Valeria's students if they chose to walk through. Everything else tended to disintegrate very, very quickly on touching any part of the shields.

"This is pointless. She hasn't done anything to harm our students," sighed Professor Goodwitch, after attempting to remove the portal for what felt like the umpteenth time that day, "Maybe we should just let her be. The students are not complaining, and they are learning new things every day,"

Ozpin took a sip from his mug and gazed resignedly at the portal. "Maybe. But the other academies will not be happy about being excluded from this class, Glynda. And you know very well that envy is effective at attracting Grimm. Especially from so many students at once,"

"Well, you'll just have to find a way to distract them. The Vytal Festival fairgrounds are up, and I think that should be enough to distract the exchange students from these thoughts,"

"Let us hope so,"

* * *

Meanwhile, in a secluded part of Patch, Ruby stood over a white memorial stone overlooking a calm stretch of sea. A gentle breeze rustled the red autumn leaves of the trees around her; and amid the falling leaves, little rose petals danced in the wind from under her cloak.

"Hey, mum," she whispered, pushing up her cloak's hood so that it was no longer covering her head, "Sorry I haven't come by in a while. Things have been...well, things have been...pretty busy. Oh, Dad's still here, too. He's uh, you know...Dad,"

She shrugged mildly, at a loss as to what else to say about her father. Sure, Taiyang did look after them well enough, though it was mostly Yang that did the work around the house with Summer gone.

"He's still teaching at Signal. But he says he's going to be on a mission soon. I think he misses adventuring with you. I miss you, too,"

She sniffs, feeling tears well up in her eyes. But before she could wipe it away, she heard a plaintive whine of a dog, and a pair of large, fluffy arms wrap around her shoulders from behind. A bright neon-green patchwork handkerchief crept into her sight, and she felt it gently wipe away her tears.

"Oh, what's got my number one cookie fan so depressed, hm?" Ra'shamarra cooed, standing up and teleporting in front of her, sitting cross-legged on top of Summer's memorial stone. She looked curiously in concern, though her ever-present grin slowly morphed into confusion when Ruby's sad eyes widened in surprise. "What? Is it me? But you just had a cookie! Is it another one you want? Of course it is. Haskill!"

"No, no, no, nothing like that, Auntie Ra'shamarra!" she said hurriedly, "Um...you're kind of...sitting on my mum's grave,"

The elderly khajiit gasped and immediately leapt to her feet with a yowl, quicker than if somebody had lit a blazing fire beneath her. Brushing down her harlequin robes, she spun about and made a theatrical bow towards the gravestone.

"Oh, my most _sincere_ apologies, my cookie monster's mother! Never before has the mortal world created such an adorable little minion-"

"Hey!" Ruby cried out indignantly, "That's not nice,"

"But it's true! You are one of the most adorable little ones that this old khajiit has ever seen!" Ra'shamarra said, grinning broadly, "Why, most of the others tend to run when dear old Sheogorath comes into view. Saying something about not wanting to have their cabbages, or take needles to their yarn,"

"Um...okay then. Anyway, mum, I'd like you to meet Auntie Ra'shamarra. She's...a little strange," Ruby continued, trying to ignore the faces that Ra'shamarra was pulling. Eventually, however, she conjured a stack of ethereal bones and started to juggle them, causing Zwei to bark excitedly and jump up and down, trying to catch them. "Okay. Maybe more than a little strange. But she's nice. I really wish you could meet her. Or Archmage Septim,"

"You know, you still have a wish to make, right?"

Ruby's jaw dropped when she heard those words.

She still had a wish.

Archmage Septim owed her a wish. And she was a master of all schools of magicka.

She had heard Weiss talking in awe about how masters of the Restoration school could keep even a mortally wounded person from slipping away into death.

She knew that some of them actually _cheated_ death by becoming immortal. Like Valeria with her vampirism; or Ra'shamarra, by apparently becoming a deity of sorts.

Maybe one of them could bring her back. No, they _had_ to know how to bring her back.

"Auntie Ra'shamarra," Ruby asked slowly, thinking about what she was about to ask, "Can you bring the dead back to life?"

Ra'shamarra's face wore a thoughtful expression. "Hm. It's been a long time since someone's asked me that! Too long. Maybe, though. If they were bound to my service in life, then I can just bring them back from the dead! Back in the Shivering Isles, of course. Not here, in a plane that doesn't belong to me,"

"So...no?" Ruby continued, her shoulders slumping in disappointment.

"I haven't said no yet!" snapped Ra'shamarra, startling Ruby. "It's possible. Like anything else. You don't worship the Nine, which means that your souls don't go scurrying off to the Dreamsleeve to be cleansed and recycled after your ticker stops beating. And you're definitely not worshipping a Daedric Prince, otherwise the other princes would be at my throat right now for talking to one of their worshippers. Except if you're mine, of course. Are you?"

"Uh...I don't know?"

"Ha! Just messing with you. It'd be nice, of course, if you did. But you don't want to sign off your soul to a Daedric Prince. Nasty creatures. Unless it's me! Or Meridia, but that's beside the point. Still, if you don't worship the Nine, Arkay can't pull your soul to Aetherius once you're dead. And if you don't worship any of us Daedric princes, that means your souls don't go to us,"

"I don't get it. What does that even mean?" Ruby murmured, perplexed, "Where do they go then?"

"The answer is..." Ra'shamarra spoke, conjuring a ball of purple light and throwing it on Summer's grave. The sphere fizzled and vanished, causing a bright white light to illuminate the grave, "Ha! I knew it. Her soul's still here,"

"Really?!" exclaimed Ruby, "Can you...you know...?"

"Bring her back to life? Ye—no! Like I said before, she's not my follower. That means her soul isn't mine to deal with, and us Daedric princes can't touch mortals' souls unless willingly given. Blame my daughter for that rule. And my husband, too. Actually, make that the whole Septim line, all the way down to Alessia the slave queen! If she didn't beg Akatosh to make that pact, I _would_ be able to do it,"

Ruby was crushed. Here she thought that magic could fix anything. Thought that maybe, just maybe, she could see her mother again. She sniffed, and then cried loudly, sitting down on the grassy ground below. Curiously, however, Ra'shamarra's ears pricked up, and she turned to face the gravestone again.

"Huh? What's that? Oh. You want your kid to stop crying?" the khajiit said, seemingly to nobody in particular. "Okay then! My number one cookie fan, if you can stop crying right now, you can have a cookie! A giant one. Hmm...what was that? She likes...oh, how delectable! Vanilla, chocolate, strawberries and stuffed with whipped cream? Four sugars dusted on top?"

Ruby gawked at Ra'shamarra, her grief overwhelmed by shock. That was a recipe that _nobody_ should know, except for her and Yang – and maybe her dad, if he even paid enough attention when they cooked. "H-How'd you know that?"

"I said I couldn't _touch_ her soul. Doesn't mean I can't listen to what she has to say!" giggled Ra'shamarra, "Oh, stop that. You're making me blush. Anyway, she says that since she can't bake you any, for obvious reasons, she's asking _me_ to make some for you! Oh? With sliced strawberries on top? Easily done!"

For once, hope flooded her mind. Those were things that nobody else should know, except her immediate family, and yet the khajiit spouted them off as though she was actually having a conversation with her mother. It was true that Ra'shamarra was a madgod, and if Weiss were around, the heiress would likely just chalk it up to another bout of her madness. But there was also an equally good chance that she was telling the truth-

"What, you actually think I'm lying?!" gasped Ra'shamarra, clutching at her heart, "How rude!"

Okay. Maybe she _was_ telling the truth.

"So um...do you know anyone that could bring the dead back to life?" Ruby asked tentatively.

"I know my daughter can shout dead dragons back to life, but that's because she has the bloodline of Akatosh in her veins, and has won that right through her victory over Alduin. But your mother isn't a dragon, is she?"

"It's worth a try anyway," Ruby said, "I think I still haven't wished for anything yet,"

* * *

"...You wish for me me to do WHAT?" shrieked Valeria, startling several other students in the hangar. Knowing of Valeria's vicious temper once angered, many of them scooted as far away from her as possible. Lowering her voice, she leaned in closer to Ruby, glaring into her eyes, "No. I cannot – will not – do that,"

"No! You said that you'll grant a wish if it's within your power. And if it's not evil," Ruby retorted indignantly. "Auntie Ra'shamarra said that you can bring dragons back to life. Why can't you do it for me? I'm not out to do bad things!"

For a few moments, Valeria glared at Ruby; though to the little reaper's credit, her love for her mother held firm and she refused to budge. Finally, Valeria relented and sighed, cradling her temples with both her hands.

"You do realise the trouble this will cause for myself, correct? I have agreed only yesterday that I would not set foot in Vale, and Patch is considered a dependency of Vale," grumbled the archmage.

"But you said you'd grant a wish if it's in your power. And it's not like I'm going to tell on you or anything,"

"I really should not offer open wagers. Fine, if you keep insisting, I suppose I have no way to get out of this obligation of mine. Students, please keep practicing with my battlemages. I shall return in approximately an hour. Come, Miss Rose,"

Before she could even respond, Valeria threw a purple ball of energy at Ruby, throwing her into a portal. Having not expected being hurled into a portal, she felt as though she were thrown into a washing machine and bounced around like a rubber ball.

"Think of where you would like to go. If you cannot focus, then it will be very difficult for myself to create a portal to where we must go,"

"That—mmmphh-might be a bit hard!" Ruby sputtered, her head spinning from being tumbled about. Eventually, she managed to think of her mother's grave for long enough that Valeria could latch on to the thought. Ruby had been ejected much less gracefully than Valeria; she rolled about on the grass, catching a mouthful of grass and dirt before eventually coming to a stop by Valeria's feet.

"Mother," Valeria spoke exasperatedly, "Did you...of course you did. She wouldn't have known otherwise about that particular Shout. Why? Why would you reveal that?!"

"You know why, little kitten. I won't have my only daughter dragging my family's name through the mud because you can't uphold a promise," she giggled in response, a manic glint in her eyes, "That, and I do so enjoy seeing you annoyed! Brings a little bit of warmth to my heart. Maybe a little bit more than a bit. But that would make it a lot! Aaaanyway. You know what you have to do, so snap to it!"

Growling angrily, Valeria otherwise turned about to face Ruby. "Meridia will have your head for this, mother, and we can ill afford another war in the Shivering Isles. We will have to speak later, as to how we shall make amends with our ally for offending her. So, Miss Rose...as I understand, you are wishing for your mother to return to life? You are asking for a resurrection?"

Ruby nodded.

"You are aware, of course, that most branches of necromancy are illegal in the Empire, and have been illegal, for the last fifteen hundred years. And for good reason, I might add. Tampering with the souls of the dead is not a simple matter, and should not be taken trivially. Do you understand this?"

Ruby nodded again, though more slowly. Valeria slowly turned to the gravestone and closed her eyes, conjuring the same purple flames that Ra'shamarra had cast before on the grave. Though unlike Ra'shamarra's flame, there was something more...powerful...about her one. Something hungrier, something more commanding. As though even a touch of it could bind a person or creature to her will. The grave flashed white again on touching the gravestone; Ruby gasped as she saw a misty, unfocused apparition rise up and push itself up from the grave.

Her mother. Or at least, her ghost. Semi-transparent, tinged blue, but it was still recognisably her mother.

"Mum?" she breathed, taking a step forward. Valeria hissed and snapped out her hand, barring Ruby from taking another step forward.

"Her soul, bound to my will and given a rudimentary physical form," murmured the archmage, "Touching her in this state will kill you. In what would invariably be a slow, painful death as your own soul is slowly devoured by hers,"

"But I wanted her to be alive!" wailed the little reaper, stamping her foot, "I want her back. I wanted our family to be whole again. I wanted-"

"SILENCE!" she shouted, letting her thu'um flow into her words and causing the ground to quake. "Yes. I am well aware of what you want. It is always the same with every single person that asks of me this favour. But the right to return her back to life lies not with you, nor myself. What if she desires not to return? What if she finds comfort in the eternal sleep of death? Would you then deny her will, to impose yours?"

"But..."

"And this is why I have brought her back temporarily. The right to return her to her physical form is neither yours nor mine. The decision is hers, and hers alone; and therefore, I must ask her," Valeria spoke, her eyes reading the gravestone's inscription, "Very well. Summer Rose. If you are capable of comprehending what I say, please nod,"

The ghost nodded.

"Very good. I am sure you see your child beside myself. She is the reason why I have brought you back to this mortal realm, at least temporarily. The ritual to rebind you to the physical realm is within my knowledge, as distasteful as it is for myself to remember it. However, the choice of whether or not you wish to return is not for myself or your daughter to decide upon. If you do choose to return until you die once more, nod again,"

The ghost nodded again.

"Very well. Your consent is noted. Let it be known by the gods that your return is sanctioned by your own will," sighed Valeria. Turning to a delighted Ruby, she frowned deeply, "This next portion of the ritual is one that I utterly detest. Though dragons I may return without it, to return the corporeal form of a man, mer, or beastfolk requires a sacrifice of flesh and blood. For the creation of a body requires the sacrifice of something of equal worth,"

"Sacrifice of flesh...and blood?" Ruby squeaked, backing away a little when Valeria produced a silver dagger from under her robes.

She fingered the edge for a little while, before suddenly slashing open the tip of her finger. Blackish-red blood began to bubble from the open wound, which the khajiit used to draw a ritual glyph upon the white marble headstone. It was like some macabre work of calligraphy; the jagged letters of Daedric written in the red ink of her lifeblood.

"The invoker completes her written plea, in a bargain sealed with her own blood," Valeria intoned, "Let the liminal barriers weaken; let the energies of Aetherius flow through. The exchange of energies requires the offering of flesh and blood. Let the supplicant present her offering!"

Turning to Ruby, Valeria looked at her seriously. "This is your last chance to reverse your wish, Miss Rose. I shall require a little of your blood, and a finger, in order to complete the ritual,"

"A finger?!"

"Yes. A finger. The darkest of the dark arts requires terrible offerings of one's own person. As I have stated before, Necromancy has been banned for many centuries for many good reasons," sighed Valeria.

For a moment, Ruby looked as though she were about to run. But she did not; instead, she nodded vigorously, with determination burning in her eyes. She wanted her mother back, at any cost. Her left hand trembling, she held it out to Valeria, who had chilled her silver dagger with a jet of frost.

"Now, now, my little cookie devourer. We can't have you biting your tongue, can we?" she heard Ra'shamarra whisper in her ear, while waving a strip of leather in front of her. "Bite down on this. It'll help, if you don't want to be without a tongue,"

Gratefully, Ruby took the strip of leather between her teeth. Ra'shamarra started to cast a numbing spell while purring comfortingly in the brunette's ear, while Valeria slowly lowered her knife closer and closer to her pinky. In a flash of silver, the finger fell cleanly away, almost painlessly; Ruby was only vaguely aware of the slow throbbing of its stub as blood spurted out onto the gravestone.

Which, to Ruby's shock, erupted in a sickly greenish-white flame. The letters that were written in blood; the circle, the glyphs; even her finger and blood vanished as if they had never been there before.

"The ritual is complete, and the offerings are consumed," Valeria spoke, "May the gods both new and old deem it sufficient. Now, Miss Rose, please stand back. Mother, if you could heal her wounds, it would be most appreciated. **SLEN...TIID...VO!** "

A pulse of energy shot out from Valeria's mouth as she roared out the last syllable of the Shout. The gravestone cracked and shattered; the ground trembled and shook; and the sky itself darkened momentarily, as if the rising sun had been driven back into hiding. The ghost of Summer Rose slowly faded and winked out of existence, leaving only wisps of ethereal energy behind.

And then as soon as it came, the darkness left. It looked as though nothing had happened. The headstone was still there, albeit severely damaged. The blood, both hers and Valeria's, vanished completely.

And yet, there was no Summer Rose standing there.

"Did it...work?" Ruby asked uncertainly. Valeria nodded, waving her hand and breaking away chunks of the headstone. When she finally lifted away the last chunks of stone, they could hear weak, muffled shouts coming from below – and the pounding of fists on wood.

"Mum?!" she gasped. Valeria narrowed her eyes in concentration and slowly ripped the coffin out of the ground with careful use of telekinesis. Nails popped away, wood splintered and iron bandings ripped apart; and with a slight bang, the coffin's lid broke free – and along with it tumbled out a gasping, sputtering Summer Rose, still wrapped in her burial shroud. "Mum!"

"Ruby? Ruby!" she gasped out, still breathing heavily as she stood up, right before a bawling Ruby tackled her about the midriff. The woman was a spitting image of Ruby herself. The brunette had red tips on her hair, just like Ruby; she was a little on the short side, and...

"Oh. Oh, my!" Ra'shamarra giggled, as the burial shroud wrapping Summer's body fell away, "Don't mind me, I'm just admiring the view. I really don't mind the view! It's a great view! Really is!"

"Ewww. Auntie Ra'shamarra! That's my _mum_ you're talking about there!" Ruby sputtered out, blushing a brilliant shade of red. One that was mirrored by Summer after she realised her problem: a distinct lack of clothing. A plaintive 'oww' followed a resounding thwack as Valeria gave her mother a slap behind the ears. The archmage took off her travelling cloak and draped it about Summer's shoulders to preserve her modesty.

"So, the ritual is...complete," Valeria spoke, her voice low and dripping with distaste, "Miss Rose, I hope that you are satisfied. Your mother has been restored to life – and I hope that you shall never have to call upon me to repeat this again. After all, one has only so many fingers to sacrifice. But, ah, I believe that we may have a...slight issue,"

Valeria looked into Summer Rose's eyes. They were a bright, burning gold, just like her own.

"Yes...definitely a slight issue,"

* * *

On returning to the _Wrath of Talos_ , Valeria opted to teleport into her private chambers. It was most unladylike, after all, to strut about with nothing but a travelling cloak on; and if she had teleported into the usual practice room for Beacon's students, there was a good chance that one of them would recognise a long-dead huntress and report back to Ozpin. Or the Nine forbid, to the gossip circles of Beacon Academy. At least in her room, Summer could go and find a spare robe to wear without being bothered or spotted by anyone, even if it was far too large for her small frame.

"Aww, so she can't come back home? Why not?" Ruby pouted, as she sat down on the edge of Valeria's bed.

Currently, Ra'shamarra was sitting across Summer, who was eating a fruit salad ravenously. Or rather, was being _fed_ a fruit salad, if one had to be precise, as the Madgod seemed to take great delight in levitating pieces of cut fruit into her mouth for some reason or another.

"There is a good chance that your mother has turned into some form of half-vampire, owing to the use of my blood for the ritual," mused Valeria, noting that the white-cloaked Rose's eyes definitely displayed the traits of a pure-blooded vampire. Golden irises, burning with ravenous hunger; though she was still capable of eating normal food, it seemed. "I cannot recall any prior instance of this happening. For all I am aware of, she is the first-"

"Nope! Second one. Or at least, not the first," Ra'shamarra butted in, looking over her shoulder at Valeria, "First one I've seen was the Grand Champion of the Imperial City Arena. Agronak, I think his name was,"

"Very well. She is not the first, then. Regardless, my diagnostic magic reveals that her soul is still anchored to mine. Until I can be certain that her soul will not attempt to leave her body when I venture too far away, I shall have to keep her aboard this ship, at my side,"

"Oh, but I really wanted to come with my little Ruby," Summer said, pouting. The resemblance between Ruby and her mother truly was uncanny; they even had similar mannerisms. "Still...I can't thank you enough! It's...different being back. Everything isn't hazy; I can smell again, I can breathe again, I can touch and taste and hear things clearly! I feel like a new woman!"

She winced as she remembered something important. Something _very_ important. "Ruby, how many years has it been? How old are you now? And how's Yang doing? She must have missed me so much,"

"Mum, I'm...almost sixteen now. Yang's doing great, actually! We're in the Vytal Festival,"

"Which, if you are in the first round of matches, Miss Rose," Valeria interrupted, checking her dataslate, "Miss Nikos has just sent me a message informing me that your match is scheduled to start in ten minutes. As much as I am sure that you wish to speak at length with your mother, it would be unwise to be late to a tournament,"

"Eep!" Ruby gasped, bolting out of the room in a trail of rose petals. Valeria sighed, while both Summer and Ra'shamarra chuckled in amusement.

* * *

A/N:

Well, Ruby better appreciate what Valeria just did. Breaking her own laws just to satisfy a wager. It must really suck to have two conflicting obligations and having to pick one of them.

Also wow, guys. Didn't think that many people were reading this. 50k views already? I'm humbled.

Akshka: There's no issue with that, but colonising a planet is a very, *very* lengthy endeavour, costing trillions upon trillions of septims to complete. It would likely require entire planetary surveys to be completed before that could go ahead - and that's only if they found minerals or a biosphere which makes it economical to settle there. Terraforming, of course, is another option - but infinitely more expensive than simple settlements.

Allard-Liao: Yep! About par for the course. As Carl von Clausewitz puts it, " _War_ is not merely an act of policy but a true political _instrument"._ Conflict is simply a natural result of differing interests which could not be resolved through diplomatic means, therefore requiring the use of force to assert the correctness of one's own beliefs through warfare. After all, history is written by the victors. Anschluss ALL the clay!

Dragon Man 180: Well, we'll have to see if Weiss can get brave enough to challenge her father first, won't we? Can't have a puppet of an archmage, after all. Wouldn't do to have a weak-willed mage lead a college or university!


	27. 26 - The First Match

While Ruby had been off with Valeria, the rest of Team RWBY had already seated themselves inside Amity Colosseum, waiting for the first match to begin. As the clock counted down, Weiss grew more and more concerned about whether or not Ruby was going to return on time; Yang had said that their father was going to drop her off at Amity Colosseum after she had finished her annual visit to Summer Rose's grave, but apparently now she had decided to go with Valeria. And now, they only had ten minutes left before their first match against Team ABRN from Vacuo.

"She's going to be back in time, right?" whispered Weiss nervously to Yang, who nodded to reassure her that everything was fine.

"Yeah. I mean, Archcat can kind of make portals anywhere she wants. It's hard to be late like that,"

"But she's been banned from coming down to Vale," Blake added, frowning, "She can't take Ruby down here any more. Not unless she wants to risk an incident. Even Professor Ozpin can't do anything about that,"

"This one thinks that would be true," rasped a familiar voice from beside them, "Except this one has _not_ been prohibited from coming,"

A tall, hooded khajiit in a richly-embroidered black-and-red robe stood beside Weiss. She had a hacking, sickly cough, leaning heavily on the silver staff that she held in one hand. Ruby was holding on to the other, helping her stay upright.

"J'Bari? Is that you?" Blake gasped, standing up and looking under her hood. There, exhausted and looking rather worse-for-wear, was J'Bari; with a wan smile on her lips and bandages barely visible beneath her robes.

"This one believes that was this one's name. And still is," purred J'Bari. Weiss scooted over on her seat and motioned for her to sit down; something which she did very gratefully. "This one thanks you, friend,"

"So, why'd you end up going with Archcat, Rubes-" Yang said, turning away from the current exhibition match between Atlas and Mistral. Her eyes fell on Ruby's bandaged hand and she frowned, pointing at it. "What the hell? Rubes, what happened to your hand?"

"Oh, it's...it's nothing. Nothing much! Honest!" she said, trying to hide it from them. Not quick enough, however, as Weiss grabbed her left hand and pulled it to eye level.

"Ruby," Weiss said slowly, her eyes narrowing, "I don't think missing a finger is 'nothing much'. What exactly did you get into?"

"Missing a finger?" Yang yelped, jumping up from her seat. Her eyes blazed a furious red. "Who did this? I'll make them pay!"

"Unless Yang wishes to duel Her Majesty, this one thinks that is a most unwise declaration to make," said J'Bari, shrugging her shoulders, "This one also believes that Ruby was complicit in deciding to do that. But this is not a matter to discuss in an open space,"

The cold glare from J'Bari told Yang that this was something that she could not argue against. Grudgingly, she nodded and dropped back into her seat. "Alright. Have it your way. But you owe us an explanation later,"

"This one believes that Ruby owes Yang an explanation. This one, after all, was still in the hospital wing when the event occurred. In any case, this one believes that your match is about to start. Should you not prepare first?"

"You know, she's right. We probably should get going," Blake muttered, "Being late is an instant disqualification,"

"That would be correct. This one wishes you good luck, dear friends. May you remember every lesson that Her Majesty has taught you so far, and you shall emerge victorious. Today, this one will simply watch and enjoy herself,"

* * *

"Hello! It seems that we have another astonishing bout ahead of us! Wouldn't you agree, Professor?" Port cheerfully declared.

"Doctor," grumbled Oobleck, who promptly switched back to his usual excited manner, "And yes, Peter, I think it's safe to say that this match may be the closest we've seen of the four-on-four round of the tournament!"

"For those of you just now joining us, welcome to the Vytal Festival Tournament, broadcast live from Amity Colosseum! If this is your first time watching, allow us to break down the rules..."

Ruby tuned out of Professor Port's explanation of the rules. They'd all read it before, after all. Many times over, considering Weiss' obsession with proper observation of rules. What she was more concerned about, however, was her left hand. Sure, having no pinky at all on her left hand was less critical than say, missing an index finger on her right. That would have made it _very_ problematic indeed when it comes to firing her Crescent Rose.

"You better come clean later, Rubes. What in Oum's name did you do?" Yang said, putting her in a friendly headlock while rubbing a knuckle against her temples. "Or you'll be getting a lot of this later tonight after the tournament!"

"Ow! Yaaaang! Stop it!" whined Ruby, who was fruitlessly batting away at the brawler's arm.

Weiss was the next to comment, crossing her arms and standing in front of her. "Yes. After all, it's not every day that someone decides to cut off their own finger,"

"Guys. We probably should get into position. Our round is about to start,"

Nodding, each of the members of Team RWBY took up their places on the stadium floor. The terrain randomiser was still spinning; eventually, the two randomisers settled on ice and fire. Promptly, the arena began to shift; a field strewn by Ice Dust crystals and glaciers on one side emerged from the floor, while on the other was a simulation of a volcanic battlefield, complete with miniature eruptions and many explosive Fire Dust crystals.

"Three! Two! One! BEGIN!"

"Weiss! Conjuration!" Ruby cried out. The heiress smirked, calling forth a ball of purple eldritch flame in her hand. She hurled it at the ground, causing a pair of flame atronachs to burst out in a whirlwind of dark smoke. Ruby did the same, calling forth an enormous ghostly wolf the size of a horse.

"Oh-ho! This is something new!" Port commented, echoed by gasps from the audience as Ruby mounted the wolf and started to shoot at their stunned opposition from atop its back, while Weiss' flame atronachs danced about over the ice while flinging a storm of fireballs at them. "Bringing new allies into the mix! How will Team ABRN deal with this new development?"

Yang grinned as she watched Ruby's conjured direwolf bound with her on its back. Snow and ice were no issue for a creature with such massive, massive paws; a benefit that her sister mercilessly exploited, firing round after round at Nadir while the other huntsman was slipping and sliding on the ice. On the other hand, Bolin and Reese were having a hard time keeping up with the pair of flame atronachs. The white-hot fireballs that the conjured creatures were flinging proved to be highly effective against Aura; a single direct hit easily shaved a good ten percent from them, as well as throwing them about from the explosive force. Weiss herself was flinging spears of ice from both her free hand and her rapier, suppressing her two opponents under torrents of magickal fire and frost.

"And that means you and I get to dance," chuckled Yang, getting into a fighting stance. Arslan, the last remaining member of their opposing team, growled and readied her rope dart. The two circled each other, waiting for the other to show an opening in their stances.

Yang struck first, lashing out with her fist. Arslan caught it with a blow of her own, their fists clashing together with an earth-shaking slam. A flurry of blows were exchanged, with both of them dodging and blocking faster than any of the others could see; but eventually, after a punch which left her overextended, Yang found her leg tangled in Arslan's rope dart. A sharp yank launched her from the centre of the arena onto the ice.

"Blake! Shadowcat!"

Arslan raised an eyebrow as she heard the command from Ruby. Looking around, there was no Blake in sight. Not on the volcanic part of the arena, nor on the icy glaciers on the other side. And definitely not in the middle of the arena. And yet, despite the explosions of the fireballs and the sharp stabbing impacts of the icy spears being thrown around by Weiss, Arslan was certain that she could hear footsteps.

Footsteps that were far too close.

She whipped around towards the source of the sound. Only to see a shimmering patch of air in the shape of a person. To her shock, the shimering patch flashed and revealed a smirking Blake.

"Hello," she heard Blake whisper, before she felt a sharp pain in her gut. A faintly-glowing black blade was there, the point just a sliver of a hair away from piercing her skin. "Goodbye!"

Arslan gasped for air, dropping her weapons and clutching her stomach in agony. "Ouch, that must have hurt! Arslan Atlan is out by Aura level! How Miss Belladonna has turned invisible for half a minute is a mystery, but it is no doubt extremely effective for a sneak attack!"

Yang had finally managed to stagger to her feet despite the ice, though she found herself unable to hold any form of combat stance. A fact that was exploited by Nadir, who had ducked behind a glacier and was currently safe from Ruby. Raising his assault rifle, he lined up a clean shot at the unsteady brawler- and was promptly knocked over from behind by something very large, growly, and covered in thick, shaggy fur. His assault rifle clattered away on the ice, largely forgotten as the wolf dragged him out into the open by his leg.

Ruby had dismounted her wolf earlier, and was now perched on top of one of the glaciers. Smiling as she looked down into the scope of Crescent Rose, she had a good, clear shot at Nadir's head. Who needed spotters when you could drag the enemies out into the open with a conjured direwolf, anyway?

Both Bolin and Reese came to the rescue of their teammate, the hoverboarder jumping up before slamming the board's blades down on its back, and the staff-wielder smacking the wolf's jaws with hundreds of rapid strikes from his staff. With a pained howl, the wolf let go of their teammate and snapped at both the staff wielder and the hoverboarder. When the wolf lunged forward, however, it vanished into ethereal smoke before it could touch either of them.

"Aww," Ruby whined, pouting. Sometimes she wished she could hold the Conjuration spells for longer, but her magicka reserves were depleted as it was.

Weiss' atronachs had also vanished, banished back to Oblivion before they could break their bindings. The rest of Team ABRN looked somewhat relieved; Yang was still sliding around on the ice, unable to move. Ruby was perched out in the open, on top of a glacier peak, without a wolf to carry them about. And Weiss-

Weiss.

Their jaws dropped as they saw her hold a swirling vortex of white, violently roiling ice and snow in between her hands. Her eyes were closed in concentration; every second, the vortex grew larger and larger, until it grew so large that it looked as though it were about to engulf half the arena. When she opened her eyes, she had a wicked smile on her lips. One that spoke of untold pain about to be dealt.

"RUN!" Reese shouted, attempting to move both her other teammates using her hoverboard. Which, in hindsight, was perhaps not the best of ideas. With both of them panicking, the hoverboard could hardly stay stable; it pitched this way and that, eventually tossing all of them onto the ice when the board shot off into the distance. And that was when they heard the howling winds of a blizzard rushing towards them. Their vision whited out as wintry chill gripped at their fingers and limbs – and eventually their entire bodies were frozen solid by a wave of unimaginable cold.

"Uh...guys, I don't think our weapons can cut through that much ice," they heard Blake say.

They were vaguely aware of Blake, Ruby and Yang grunting and wheezing as their frozen forms were slowly pushed to the edge of the ring – and then out. If they were not so furious about being thrown out of the ring in such a way, they might have found the ensuing argument between the members of Team RWBY amusing. Something about how the heiress didn't want to pull her own weight when it came to hard labour.

"And that's the match! Reese Chloris, Nadir Shiko and Bolin Hori are eliminated by ring out!" Professor Port shouted, "An incredible display of skill by our up-and-coming huntresses. Team RWBY is victorious!"

* * *

"We did it!" Ruby cheered, leaping high into the air. Moments later, however, her seemingly inexhaustible energy apparently found its limits, and she fell down and hunched over, clutching at her stomach. "...Is anyone else starving?"

"Well, I _may_ have worked up an appetite..." Blake concurred. Her usual calm and cool demeanour, however, was betrayed by the rumbling of her stomach. A rumbling that an alpha beowolf would have been hard-pressed to match, much to her embarrassment.

"This is a fairgrounds, after all. This one believes that there is much food to enjoy," J'Bari commented from behind them, causing them all to spin around in surprise. "This one is impressed. There has been much improvement. Well done,"

"J'Bari~!" Ruby giggled, wrapping her arms around the khajiit's waist, "You were watching our match, weren't you? How did we do?"

"This one thinks that you did well. Mounting an oversized wolf familiar is something that is perhaps not advisable, owing to the difficulty of maintaining control over it and wielding a weapon at the same time, but you have done well in doing both," purred J'Bari. Then, turning to Weiss, she chuckled, "This one thinks that you have spent too much time with Her Majesty,"

"Hmph! It worked, didn't it?" Weiss harrumphed, turning away from the khajiit.

"Regardless, this one has been curious about the food that is present in the fairgrounds. Hospital food has not been kind to this one's tastebuds," murmured J'Bari, clutching at her stomach.

Ruby and Yang looked at each other and shivered. If there was one universal constant that seemed to apply everywhere, it was the fact that hospital food was unanimously considered terrible. "We'll have to fix that! C'mon, I know just the place,"

Moments later, they arrived at a noodle stand. J'Bari tilted her head in confusion when she saw the face of the elderly man who was manning the stall. She was certain she had seen him around the town before; placing up banners, sweeping the streets – even driving delivery trucks for a certain Dust shop that Valeria had visited once. Did he have numerous identical siblings, or was he somehow capable of being everywhere and anywhere at once? This was a mystery that she filed away for later investigation.

"I'll have a bowl of the regular, please?" Yang said, smiling as a massive bowl of noodles instantly appeared in front of her.

"Oooh," Ruby said, eyeing the massive bowl with wonder, "I'll take the same,"

"Hmm...do you have anything with a low-salt-"

Weiss' request was stopped when an equally large bowl slid in front of her, with notably less soy sauce drizzled on top. "Ah! Umm...okay?"

Blake, however, merely nodded to the old man in charge of the shop. Seemingly understanding what she needed, the man bolted into the back of the stall. As quick as a flash, he returned moments later with an enormous bowl of noodles – topped by several very large, crisply-grilled fish. Fish that were cooked to perfection, and smelled utterly divine – to everyone of the feline persuasion.

Let it be known that Blake was not the greatest fan of grilled fish on noodles among them after that day. For the old man later found himself with a pouch full of solid gold coins – and a distinct lack of fish to cook for the rest of the day.

* * *

A/N:

Cats and fish. The two go together oh so well. It's almost a crime to not have the two together; like having pepper without salt! :D

MeleeSmasher: Yep, Ra'shamarra is that pervy old person :P Move over, Master Roshi. As for their reactions, we'll have to wait and see, won't we? Especially seeing as Summer may possibly have been brought back with a slight...issue.

Dragon Man 180: Lol, seeing someone brought back from the dead is a whole new can of worms. Imagine how many huntsmen/huntresses/everyone in general has lost a relative, friend or loved one, and then they see this one particular huntress brought back thanks to a gamble that was won by her daughter. Nek minnit, Valeria gets dragged into a gambling den by a bunch of hopeful people who have lost something, all wanting to have someone resurrected... .

And yep, technically Valeria didn't break laws as such. It's just that there are other beings that may take offense despite not breaking the laws, seeing as now she's pissed off Meridia by performing necromancy.


	28. 27 - Oblivion Hath no Fury

While RWBY was on Remnant, Valeria was up in her private quarters, speaking with Summer as the recently-resurrected woman sat and relaxed on the four-poster bed inside. Ra'shamarra had long since left, saying that she had some cabbages to distribute among her subjects. It was a statement that Summer raised an eyebrow at, but Valeria assured her that was apparently 'normal' for her rather odd mother. A part of her still questioned whether the cat faunus – or rather, the _khajiit_ , as Valeria had said before – was truly insane; but all questions were put to rest when Valeria walked in front of her again, holding a small purple flame and holding it rather closely to her skin while muttering some strange incantations as she did so.

Eventually, she leant back and exhaled a deep sigh.

"Well, Mrs. Rose, there seems to be a...slight complication," Valeria spoke, sitting down on the chair at her desk and pulling out a dataslate. She tapped away, evidently writing down a few notes for herself.

"I'm not dead again, am I?" chuckled Summer, still getting used to the idea of being back among the living. It was strange, being brought back; as though one were being awoken from a deep sleep, dragged up to one's feet by a powerful binding force. One that she now recognised as what Valeria termed a 'soul trap', which was apparently a method of holding a soul bound to one's will.

"No. However, to call you truly living would be a misnomer until further investigation. I do not believe that Remnant has any equivalent of what is called a 'vampire', and even that would not be correct in classifying what you are now,"

"You mean those creatures in fairytales and legends? The ones that drink blood while you sleep? They don't actually exist, do they?"

Her smile faltered when Valeria's expression remained blank. "Wait...don't tell me. They _do_ exist?"

Valeria bared her teeth, revealing the extra-long fangs in her mouth. "They certainly exist, and I must inform you that I am one," When Summer recoiled and shrank back from her in fear, Valeria held her hands up placatingly. "If you are worried about being bitten, I assure you that I no longer require blood, as I have found an alternative source of nourishment many centuries ago. It would not do for an empress of an empire to devour her own subjects, after all,"

"Then...what do you eat? Cookies?"

"If, in the event that I discover a way that I should become able once more to consume mortal sustenance, your cookies should be the first I would try," said Valeria wistfully, "Young Miss Rose insists that your cooking ability is something that does not fall short of legendary. No, I drink...this,"

She picked up a golden goblet from the shelf above her study desk, along with a crystal flask of white wine that was beside it. When the stopper was lifted from the bottle, she could smell the heady, fruity perfume of overripe grapes and pears from it; of this, the archmage poured out a generous glassful. Summer looked at the archmage curiously when she took out an opalescent crystal from a box and crushed it to dust in a mortar and pestle.

The wine bubbled and roiled rather violently after the powdered stone was poured in, much like a soft drink.

Valeria took a sip and shuddered. "Yes, this will do. If my hypothesis proves true, then you should derive some effect from this mixture. Go ahead and drink it,"

Summer tentatively reached for the offered goblet and took a sip. She fought the instant urge to spit and gag. The drink tasted nowhere near as good as it had smelled. It was chalky, gritty, and tasted remarkably like a chicken that had been grilled to a blackened crisp, and then powdered with an excessive amount of salt added as an afterthought.

"Yes, I had a similar reaction when I first drank this," Valeria chuckled lowly, smirking.

"Ugh, that was foul," choked out Summer, gagging as she tried to keep the drink down, "What was that?"

"A powdered soul gem. Specifically, that of a chicken, subjected to a brief flame spell before I crushed it and added it to a glass of wine,"

Horror would have been too mild a word to describe the utter revulsion that went through Summer's mind. "You made me drink a _soul_!?" she gasped, her face paling.

"An animal one. What difference does it make? Devouring its flesh for sustenance and devouring its soul for sustenance. Both result in the creature's death, and yet mortals seem to find one more objectionable than the other. A sentiment that I find most contradictory," Valeria said dismissively, "Now, I am well aware that you were very much weakened on resurrection. Your soul was still adjusting to your newly regenerated body, and was still latched on to mine as an anchor to the material plane. After drinking that, I sense that your soul is still anchored to mine, though not as strongly as before,"

As much as Summer didn't wish to admit it, drinking the soul _did_ make her feel better. That was, if she could ignore the strong alcohol burning down her throat, and the dry, chalky feel on her tongue and lips. Her arms and legs felt more... _alive_. Her vision was clearer, and her mind could think with perfect clarity instead of being the jumbled mess it was for the last few hours. That being said, it _still_ did not ease away the guilt in her mind about literally drinking a soul. Even if it was only a chicken's one. "I feel a lot better now. Thanks," she replied sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

"Think nothing of it. You have your daughter to thank for no longer feeling like a dead corpse," Valeria chuckled dryly. Her expression softened immediately somewhat after – though soon it morphed into something akin to fear. "Would you care for a...ah. Hello, Serana, my love. I assume that your shift was uneventful?"

Summer spun around to follow Valeria's gaze. There, in the now-open doorway, stood a statuesque woman. One with flawless pale skin covered by a thick, fur-trimmed robe, luscious locks of straight raven hair cascading down her back – and blazing golden eyes, with unmistakable rage burning within them.

"You could say that my shift _was_ uneventful, _darling_ ," the woman called Serana spoke, her voice dripping with ice-cold fury, "Though what happens _after_...remains to be seen. Especially with a stranger in our private rooms,"

"Do not assume incorrectly, Serana. She is here only as a guest. There is nothing more between us than that,"

"I will assume what I want, _darling_ ," snarled Serana, advancing on Valeria with a menacing stalk in her gait. "You had sworn before that you would not bite another person! You would not turn another into a vampire! Just as you had asked myself to stop making thralls of prisoners! And yet, here you are, in _our room_ , with a complete stranger. One that smells of YOUR blood! Why, she's even wearing one of YOUR robes!"

"I did no such thing, Serana. I have remained true to my word," hissed Valeria through gritted teeth, standing up from her seat.

"Do you take me for a fool? She _smells_ of your blood. She has the eyes of vampiric royalty! Of which only you and I, and those in Castle Volkihar are! And this ship has been moored here for quite some time, meaning that if I did not turn her, YOU did!"

"That much I am aware of, Serana. And let me reassure you, that Summer Rose has only partial vampirism – or perhaps something completely undocumented at all. Would a vampire be able to consume mortal food, instead of souls or blood? That is not a trait of the Daughters of Coldharbour. Or of any extant vampire, to be precise,"

Still glowering angrily, Serana turned to face Summer. Her eyes spoke of imminent murder, if Valeria's words could not be proven true. "Well then. I suppose since she is still here, she should prove it to me," Serana growled. Spotting one of the cookies that Ra'shamarra had left behind on Valeria's study desk, she snatched it up and thrust it out to Summer. Valeria nodded to the worried huntress, who hesitantly accepted the offered cookie and took a bite out of it.

"See for yourself. She displays no distaste for mortal food," Valeria said, noting the look of absolute bliss on Summer's face as she took another bite out of the cookie.

Bliss was far too weak a description for how Summer reacted to the cookie. It was her own recipe, to be sure; vanilla, strawberries, cream and plenty of sugar on a crumbly buttery base. But there was true refinement in it; crafted to perfection, without a single lump or burn anywhere on it. She was lost in confectionery heaven, unable to stop savouring each piece that she bit off the cookie.

"...Perhaps that worked a little too well," Summer vaguely recalled hearing someone speak, as she descended slowly into a sugary daze.

* * *

By the time Summer regained some semblance of conscious, rational thought, no longer addled by thoughts of baked goods again, she was first faced with the odd sight of the statuesque woman – Serana – reclining on Valeria's bed, with her head in the khajiit's lap. Valeria herself was running her fingers through her partner's hair, smoothing out any tangles as she applied some sort of sweet-smelling liquid to it.

"Hm. I suppose that should be enough of an apology," huffed Serana. She lifted her head up a little and looked straight at Summer, this time with far less anger than before, "She's finally awake again,"

"What happened? I feel really light-headed," Summer groaned, rubbing her head. Serana grimaced and pointed at the crumbs of cookie on Valeria's desk. "Oh. That's right. I was...eating a cookie...and then..."

"You had fallen asleep for nearly fifteen minutes after eating the cookie, but otherwise showed no ill effects. I would not have been surprised if my mother had added a dash of moonsugar rum to the cookie," commented Valeria.

"True vampires are immune to poisons of any kind. And that is a relief for me, because that means Valeria hasn't done anything that she would regret," Serana added. Though by Valeria's expression, the khajiit may have been more relieved than her partner. Summer had already seen enough of lovers' quarrels in her time, particularly between Taiyang and Raven. The results of the quarrels, suffice to say, put the most ferocious of Grimm attacks to shame. And if there was something that proved to be true everywhere, it was the fact that a scorned woman had no equal in her fury.

But that still didn't explain exactly _why_ Serana had reacted in such a way. "Um...okay? So why were you so hostile to me before? And so angry to her?"

Serana shifted uncomfortably in the archmage's lap. "The act of turning one into a pure-blooded vampire is...intimate, to say the least. Not in a wholesome way, either. Let's just say that it normally requires a lot of rather vigorous bedroom activity involving chains and blindfolds, and a lot of spilled blood from the living person that is to be turned. And by that, I mean draining them completely of blood before injecting our own into the dead and abused body,"

Summer turned a little green at the description of how vampires were created. "I think I'm going to be sick. That's too much information,"

"Indeed," Valeria murmured, clenching her fists and staring at the ground, "It is never quick, and never clean. Serana's ritual took well over a week, and I myself was killed, brought back to life and tortured by unspeakable acts more times than I could count before the Daedric Prince of Domination chose to complete the ritual. Now, I am certain you now see why my soon-to-be wife would be most upset with me if I had chosen to take advantage of another in that way for any reason at all. She is...ah, protective,"

"Yeah...I can see that. Thanks for...you know...not doing that to me,"

"Rather difficult to when you're in a coffin six feet underground, and likely just a pile of bones before my love shouted you back into the world of the living," Serana drawled sarcastically, "Yes, Valeria has explained the circumstances of your resurrection. Though I'm not impressed that your daughter has chosen to coerce my betrothed with a gamble, what's done is done. I hope you're satisfied,"

"Hey! That's not fair. I didn't exactly get a say in what Ruby did, you know," whined Summer, pouting much like her daughter.

"No, indeed you did not. However, you did agree to be returned when I offered you the choice. Therefore, you do hold partial responsibility. Serana, I would ask you to at least afford our guest at least the courtesy of not questioning her every move. She has done nothing to warrant your ire; if we must argue over this, then at least we should do so only between the two of us. Be civil to her,"

Stiffly, Serana nodded and sat up. "Fine. I suppose I'll go and check on the paperwork that's just come from Nirn. Apparently, they've found a new Elder Scroll that was thrown out of the other side of the Nirn-Remnant portal,"

"Very well. Inform me of any major developments," purred Valeria, rubbing her forehead affectionately against the back of her betrothed's head, and giving her a quick lick on the cheek. Serana gave a brief smile and slid off the bed, before morphing into a cloud of shrieking bats and disappearing through the doorway.

"Is that normal?" Summer asked, raising an eyebrow, "I mean, I've seen Qrow turn into a crow, but that's just...too weird,"

"One becomes accustomed to it after some time,"

"This is sooo weird. Wait...if Serana says that I've got your blood...does that mean I could do that too?" she said excitedly.

"Possibly. However, until your soul is firmly anchored in your body once more, I would strongly suggest against exploring that possibility. After all, having your soul removed once again would result in your death, and I, for one, am not keen on performing the resurrection ritual again. Now, on to more pleasant matters. I suppose that you may wish to know that your daughter has succeeded in winning her first match in the Vytal Festival Tournament. As did their sister team, I must add,"

Summer gasped and clapped her hands over her mouth. "Oh, that's right! It's that time of year again, isn't it? Can I watch?"

"I do believe that I can obtain a data stream from the Vale CCT. Let us see if I can find a spare dataslate for you to use while you are aboard my ship. We may yet be able to find a replay of that match,"

* * *

"She's here..." Weiss gasped, watching an airship approach the Beacon Academy docking bays. "Come on!"

Much unlike the usually reserved heiress' behaviour, Weiss bolted as quickly as she could to the shuttles headed for Beacon Academy. The rest of Team RWBY only barely made it on the shuttle before Weiss asked the pilot to return to Beacon, having been so stunned by her uncharacteristic excitement that they simply almost forgot to follow.

"Wait. Where's J'Bari?" Ruby asked, looking around the shuttle. There were only Weiss, Yang and Blake on the other seats, and no khajiit to be seen.

"Uh...I think we may have left her behind?" Blake slowly said, pointing at the airship dock that they had left from. Sure enough, there was a confused khajiit mage in robes on the edge of the airship dock, rapidly shrinking into the distance as the shuttle flew away.

"Shouldn't we go back and get her?"

Yang waved Ruby off. "Nah, she'll be fine,"

Somehow, the way that she was waving her staff and stomping her feet angrily gave the young reaper the impression that _they_ would be the ones that were not going to be fine in the near future...

* * *

A/N:

Well, Valeria is probably going to have to sleep with one eye open tonight...or if the ship has it, in a khajiit-sized cat tree.

MeleeSmasher: What about Pyrrha and Penny? o.O


	29. 28 - (Not a) Drunkle Qrow

"Weiss!" panted Ruby, chasing after the heiress after she had bolted off the shuttle, "What's the big deal? Who is it? Who is she?!"

Weiss, however, only bothered to give her partner a quick one-word reply. "Winter," she said, smiling at her elder sister.

"Wait, your...sister?" Ruby murmured, watching the other silver-haired woman approach them, a squad of Atlesian Knights and Atlesian soldiers in formation behind her.

"Winter! Winter! I'm so happy to see you!" Weiss happily cried out, running towards her elder sister as though she were about to hug her; but then, recalling the proper decorum that every single Schnee had been raised with, she suddenly halted and gave a short curtsy. "Oh...Your presence honours us,"

Winter, however, simply looked past Weiss and gave her teammates a once-over. If the downward twitch of her lips were any indication, she was somewhat unimpressed. "Beacon...it's been a long time. The air feels...different,"

"I mean, it is fall, so...eh, it's probably colder," Ruby replied, oblivious as to the actual meaning of what Winter had just said. Weiss gave Ruby a quick punch on the shoulder, embarrassed that her team leader could be such a dolt at times.

But whatever they were about to say was immediately interrupted when a tear in reality opened up to their side, and spat out a familiar grey tabby khajiit, who staggered about when she landed a little too roughly on the paved floor of Beacon Academy's main walkway. The Atlesian Knights immediately raised their weapons, as did the soldiers behind Winter; but the woman simply raised her hand and motioned for them to lower their weapons.

"This one thinks that what you have done is foolish, rash and careless," grumbled J'Bari to Weiss. She straightened out the wrinkles in her robes before hobbling over to the younger Schnee, leaving a trail of embers and sparks behind her. "Running away like a childish _ja'khajiit_! At the very least, this one would have appreciated a warning as to where you would have disappeared to! There is at least one assassin in this school, and you have the lack of wits to simply abandon your group?!"

"Sorry," Weiss replied, hanging her head apologetically, "I guess I just got too excited,"

J'Bari took a deep breath and exhaled, attempting to calm herself while clutching at her side with her free hand. Her ribs were still tender, and even that little bit of overexertion caused her a world of pain. "That you have. And...ah, Specialist Schnee. This one greets you warmly. This one asks if your journey has been uneventful?"

"As peaceful as can be. Although, I am more interested as to _why_ you are here, Inquisitor J'Bari. Is there a reason that you are not guarding your empress? And what do you mean by an assassin?"

"You may ask your general for further clarification, as he was present at the time. J'Bari was almost killed when this one stopped an infiltrator in Vale's communications tower," J'Bari replied in a low growl. She reached to the side of her robe and loosened the sash holding it tightly closed, revealing the bandaged gash underneath.

"I see," hummed Winter thoughtfully, her expression somewhat troubled. "However, I believe we should not speak of this matter in the open. Fear attracts the attention of Grimm, and any talk of an assassin present at a festival may well cause panic. But I have a question to ask. Is it wise for you to walk around with a severe injury? Particularly as you have been targeted once?"

"J'Bari is not worried about the assassin. This one has...safeguards...should she be attacked. However..." she said, trailing off as she watched a seemingly drunk man approach from behind Winter; a single swift movement, and one of her robotic soldiers had been decapitated, "...I do not believe that your guards would be as fortunate,"

"Hey!" cried out the drunken man, tossing the head of the decapitated soldier at Winter's feet, "Yeah. I'm talking to you, Ice Queen!"

"Hey! Who do you think you're talking to!" Weiss shouted back angrily, her fists clenched around Myrtenaster.

"Halt!" Winter called out, though J'Bari was far quicker and snarled, lashing out with a powerful thunderbolt from her staff. The thunderbolt blasted a sizzling crater at the man's feet, causing him to merely smirk and take another swig from his metal canteen.

"J'Bari, stop! That's my uncle, Qrow!"

The khajiit looked in confusion at Ruby, and then back at the drunken man in front of her. This was her uncle? For the life of her, she could not see _any_ resemblance at all between Ruby and the drunk. Oblivion, she could smell the stinking alcohol on his breath, and she was still quite some distance away. There was no way that the adorably childish hooded reaper was related to him. There couldn't be.

"Fancy lightshow, kittycat. Quick, too," he drawled, still swaying unsteadily on his feet. In mere moments, he had closed the gap and planted his hand on her face, earning an angry growl from her. "But I'm not here to talk to you. It's Ice Queen that I want to talk to. Saw that gaudy ship in town. Guess she's here,"

"I'm standing right before you," Winter declared, gritting her teeth as she puffed herself up to look slightly more imposing. Only causing the drunk to look at her through squinted eyes.

"So it would seem,"

"You realise that you have just destroyed Atlas Military property,"

Then he looked at the severed Atlesian Knight's head on the ground. "Oh. Oh, I'm sorry. See, I mistook it for some sort of...sentient garbage,"

Both, however, were interrupted by a shockwave which knocked them both off their feet. "J'Bari!" Weiss cried out, horrified, as she rushed to her sister's side to help her stand back up.

"If both of you have a quarrel with each other, this one does not wish to hear of it," snarled J'Bari. Her free hand held a white-hot fireball; an unspoken warning as to what would happen next if either of them made another move to annoy the other. "Resolve it in private, at some other time,"

"Fine, fine. I was only going to deliver a message anyway. You see, Ice Queen, you Atlas Specialists think that you're so special, don't you? But do you know what you really are? Just a bunch of sellouts. Just like your boss,"

"Whatever you're implying, I would suggest that you stop speaking,"

"Oh, I don't think I will. You see, I don't think you've heard. I heard ol' Ironwood has finally turned his back on Ozpin,"

Winter's gaze turned icy. "Weiss," she said, gesturing to Weiss with her free hand resting on the grip of her sabre, "It's time for you to go,"

"Oh, sure. Listen to big sister, Weiss. She'll protect you. Just like how Atlas is going to protect all of us, huh?"

"J'Bari believes this one has made her warning clear. Evidently, not clear enough," growled the khajiit. Team RWBY took a few steps back as a cloak of flames wreathed her body, and the fireball in her hand grew to the intensity of a miniature sun. "Remain civil,"

Both Winter and Qrow looked at the blazing khajiit and gulped. Slowly, they lowered their weapons. Fighting against weapons was one thing, but how does one fight a literal wall of flames? But before they could say another word, another portal materialised to their side, spitting out a leopard-like khajiit wearing a robe of riotous colours.

"Civil? CIVIL? Why, this would've been an entertaining fight, and you want THEM to remain CIVIL?" cackled the colourful khajiit. Ruby's eyes immediately brightened and she leapt onto Ra'shamarra, giggling as she clung to her waist. "Oh, hello there, little reaper! I was expecting to watch a good fight today, but it looks like my granddaughter is as much of an ice queen as her mother! She's just no fun, wouldn't you agree?"

J'Bari visibly paled, and the shroud of flames covering her vanished. "What?" Ra'shamarra said, her ever-persistent grin still plastered on her face, "Did I say something wrong? Ooh, please do tell!"

"Sheogorath, please return to the Shivering Isles," muttered J'Bari, her ears flattening against her skull. That was _not_ something that was supposed to be public knowledge, and she had just screamed it out for all to hear. She dearly hoped that nobody around was sharp enough to put the two statements together.

"Weiss, who is this...interesting character?" Winter whispered to her sister. At first glance, she was about to say that she was the Empress of the Nirnian Empire; the colour and pattern of her fur, as well as her stately form did strongly resemble the cat-woman that Winter had seen before. But there was no way that such a formal, well-mannered woman would wear something like...well, like a clown's patchwork motley combined with a robe. That, and she was excessively formal last time they had met. This woman was quite a fool, if one were to go by her manner of speaking.

"That would be Nirn's Madgod, Sheogorath,"

"I can introduce myself, thank you very much!"

Before Winter could react, Ra'shamarra had somehow conjured a gigantic throne made of- was that _cheese_? -and levitated it so that she was sitting with her arms propped on her knees, holding up her chin as she smirked right in front of Winter's face.

"Yep! I'm Lady Sheogorath. Daedric Princess of Madness! And of geniuses, inspiration and pranks. Mostly pranks. And chaotic inspiration!" cackled the madwoman, a glint of mischief in her eye. "And I know what you think, mortal. I'm flattered that you would think that I look young enough to be my daughter! Why, it makes this old crone just a little bit flattered. Maybe more than a bit flattered. Maybe I should repay you. With a drink!"

Raising an eyebrow, Winter made a mental note to herself to thank Qrow that he had at least enough presence of mind to not be...well, whatever one could describe _that_ as. Whatever thoughts she had, however, were immediately silenced by a bottle thrust into her hands.

"What is this?" said the white-haired woman, staring down at the bottle. It was some form of liquor, if the crudely-drawn grapes and wine glass on the front were any indication, but it had few other markings aside from that. "I do not drink, thank you very much. Especially not while I am on a job,"

"What nonsense! Your colleague here seems to think otherwise," Ra'shamarra replied, waving her off with a knowing smirk. "Everyone knows that a bit of social interaction is great. Especially great for when you work. Schmooze with your boss! Schmooze with your friends! Booze them up, and let the friendly words flow,"

"Not quite what I wanted to hear, but she's got the right idea. You could use a few pointers from her, Ice Queen," Qrow added, "Hey! Where's my share of the booze?"

"Oooh, who's this then? A mortal, making demands of a Madgod? Brave. Bold. Too bold," grinned the madgod, who turned to face Qrow. Taking a sniff, her grin grew even wider. "And someone who can actually back up their words with proof! I like it. I love it! I should really introduce you to Sanguine. He'd love you at his parties. See which one of you can drink more! I think my record was five hundred glasses of wine, before I had to go for a couple of hundred wheels of cheese!"

Absent-mindedly, she waved her staff about. A bolt of red light shot out from its tip and struck a little crow flying overhead. It squawked once, before vanishing in a flash of purple light and smoke. A metal keg took its place, falling rapidly from the sky – on a direct collision course with Qrow's head. "There you go! Catch!"

The man didn't have a chance. "Catch what-" he managed to say, before the keg struck the back of his head with a dull thump. All of Team RWBY winced, while Winter wore a smug smile after seeing Qrow knocked out by falling barrel of drink from the sky. Despite everything that had happened so far, this was shaping up to be quite a fine day. After all, everything was a fine day to her as long as something happened to a drunken Qrow. Something so utterly outrageous that one could rub it in his face for a few weeks? That was a bonus.

"Sheogorath," growled J'Bari, unamused by the elder khajiit's antics, "Why have you come here?"

"Bah, so rude! I haven't even had my fun yet," whined Ra'shamarra, "My daughter informed me that she had something that she wished to show you all. Come on, now, I haven't got all day! Off with you all!"

She concentrated for a moment, before releasing a dense cloud of choking, purple smoke that smelled oddly of cheese and cabbages. And by the time that it cleared, neither J'Bari nor Team RWBY were anywhere to be seen; leaving behind only an unconscious Qrow on the pavement with a barrel of spirits under one arm, and Winter with a bottle of wine in one hand. Winter herself blinked and wondered whether or not she had actually dreamt all that; but a cough behind her caught her attention.

"Specialist Schnee," Ironwood said tersely, his gaze drifting to the wine bottle in her hand and the now-snoring form of Qrow on the ground, "Care to explain what has transpired here?"

* * *

A/N:

Nope. Nope, Winter, nope! Blocked by J'Bari! You can go bash on Drunkle Qrow some other time!

MeleeSmasher: That remains to be seen. I still haven't quite settled on how those two scenes will play out.

LordMesirix: Yep. That part's still coming! You can guess where Ra'shamarra is taking Team RWBY + J'Bari now :D

Dragon Man 180: The law of dakka also applies to cookies. There can be never enough of it, in either quality nor quantity; the entire universe could be made of cookies, and only then would there be ALMOST enough cookie.

Also, Sanguine has a batch of special brew, but is waiting for Qrow to be posted in Atlas while a certain specialist is also present.


	30. Valentine's Day Special: Heart's Day

It looked like a perfectly normal morning for Valeria. The sterile artificial lights on her cabin's ceiling greeted her eyes as she slowly awoke from her slumber, causing her to growl and turn so that she was face-down, pulling her fluffy pillow over her head. She had such a good night's sleep, wrapped up in the cool embrace of her long-time partner of many centuries. So good, in fact, that she refused to believe that a new day had come, and that she needed to get up and do some work.

"The lights are too bright," she hissed, waving to get the attention of her dreadnought's composite soul. Fortis, it seemed, was always vigilant as to what everyone wanted at any time, and he promptly dimmed the lights in the room. "Thank you,"

But when Valeria snaked an arm out to try and wrap herself around her lover again, she found herself patting a hand on an empty patch of linen. Again and again she tried, increasingly nettled when she could not find any part of Serana with her fingers, until eventually she cracked open an eye to see exactly why that was the case.

Serana was simply not in bed. She raised an eyebrow, wondering exactly why her lover had gotten up so early. It was common knowledge among every one of her closest retinue that Serana was particularly protective of her right to sleep in. It was most unlike her to be up earlier than Valeria herself. In fact, Valeria could recall the number of times that she had done so on her fingers.

Which, therefore, begged an immediate investigation. Grumbling all the while, the khajiit slid out of her covers, still half asleep. Putting on a simple apprentice's robe, she gave her puffed-up fur a quick brush with a hand. Even on an off-day, an empress still had to show a little decorum, after all.

"Fortis, please give me the location of Serana," she called out to the ship's spirit.

"I am afraid that Mistress Serana is no longer present on this ship," the ship replied, in its usual reverberating, bass voice.

"Then provide me the next best solution. Where has she departed to?"

"Mistress Serana has not provided her itinerary for the day. Current exact location unknown. However, her last known location still contains traces of Aetherial energy. Evidence suggests utilisation of trans-planar portal techniques,"

Trans-planar portal techniques. Valeria's brow furrowed, and she glanced at a clock on the wall. It was an off day where one of the other officers were to command the ship, and there was no way that Serana would forget that. Even if she did forget, it was far too early; her normal shift would start in four hours.

"This is intriguing. My betrothed would not be so careless as to forget her own days of leave," she murmured to herself. There had to be an explanation as to why she was missing. "Fortis, give me the location of my apprentices,"

"Apologies, Your Majesty. All of the Remnant natives designated as your apprentices are not currently present aboard this ship. Inquisitor J'Bari is also not currently present aboard this ship,"

"Give me their last known location,"

"Their last known location was your personal suite,"

Valeria closed her eyes and cast a quick clairvoyance spell. She could vaguely see their outlines; it was hard to miss Serana's tall form, with her locks of hair cascading down her back. Nor was it hard to miss Yang's almost equally well-kept hair – or Ruby's and Weiss' short forms, seemingly locked in some form of argument. Blake, naturally, remained a safe distance behind all of the rest, engrossed in a book.

All appeared normal thus far. Team RWBY was normally coming in and out of her private chambers, provided it was not locked for privacy; there were spellbooks in there that had copious amounts of useful notes, courtesy of her days as a novice mage. However, there were four other forms that followed them. The high ponytail of one of them, along with the round shield on its back, indicated that it was most likely Pyrrha; and if that were the case, the other three must be the other three members of Team JNPR, Team RWBY's sister team.

As to the question of what they were doing, crowding her quarters while she was still asleep – with Serana no less – that proved to be answered much more quickly than she anticipated. Her mother appeared in her vision, as clear as she would be if Valeria had seen her with her own eyes; seemingly exchanged a few greetings, with Ruby giving her an affectionate hug around the waist.

"Fortis," Valeria said curiously. The ship would have been able to tell her exactly _who_ had come into her room. "I assume that you are aware that Sheogorath had been present in my quarters earlier, while I was asleep. Please give an explanation as to why this was not reported to myself,"

"As per Your Majesty's directive, Mistress Serana has been issued the right to control surveillance in your chambers. She has ordered me to stop recording all activities for the last four hours. The block still has two hours and forty-five minutes remaining,"

"Cancel that order," sighed Valeria. There was quite a significant amount of investigation she needed to do now. Why would her betrothed leave her like that, so early in the morning? And a better question was, why did she require both Teams RWBY and JNPR with her? With her mother, no less?

At least the answers to that question were in an obvious location. She had to get to the Shivering Isles. But before she would do that, she needed to prepare. One did not venture into a Daedric Prince's realm unprepared after all, whether or not said Prince was friendly.

* * *

Summer was having a great time. Never had she been in a kitchen that was so well-equipped and so well-stocked. There was a seemingly infinite amount of perfectly ground white flour in the kitchens of New Sheoth Palace, dispensed from what looked like a gigantic horn made of silver suspended by heavy chains from the ceiling. Sugar and spices were in abundance, ferried about by walking, sentient trees that strongly resembled miniature fruit trees of every sort. Gnarls, if she recalled their names correctly. She could swear that a few of them even had apples and pears hanging off their branches.

An ice-shelf on the other side of the room had literally almost every fruit that she could think of, and then some more, kept in perfect freshness by ice magic. There was a teleportation pad near the stoves that led up into a sprawling herb and flower garden, giving her limitless access to any fragrances that she might ever need.

For her, it was heaven. Sure, she missed being a huntress and killing Grimm, but with Valeria's warning to her that venturing too far from her for too long at a time would kill her, cooking in Ra'shamarra's kitchen was the next best thing. She picked a golden mixing bowl and a silver whisk from a passing gnarl, who clicked indignantly when she didn't ask first. "Sorry!" she cried out after it, eliciting a happy chirp from the tree-like creature.

She cracked a couple of eggs into the bowl and stuck the whisk in. Pursing her lips in concentration as she channelled her magicka, she grinned like a madwoman when she saw the whisk move seemingly on its own accord, beating the eggs faster than she could ever have done herself. Having Valeria's blood in her proved to be rather beneficial when learning about spellcasting. Both Ruby and Yang had expressed quite a bit of jealousy when they heard that their mother could learn basic spells almost effortlessly, owing to the formidable magicka reserves that Summer had recently acquired.

"Ruby, are you done with the first batch?" she called out with a knowing smirk on her face, noticing the large cloud of airborne flour on the other side of the kitchen.

"Uhh...almost?" chuckled Ruby, who was nervously hiding the now-empty mixing bowl behind herself. Not that it would fool anyone; the usually black-and-red dress that she wore was as white as Weiss', thanks to the flour that covered her from head to toe.

"You know, I can see you spilled the flour. How about you start again, hm?"

Ruby pouted, but brought the bowl back onto the table. Ra'shamarra, grinning as always, waved her hand and cleaned up the flour that had so thoroughly coated Ruby. "Thanks, Auntie Ra'shamarra!"

"Just remember to give me a cookie! Or I'll skip rope with you, and make your mother and sister watch!"

It was rather unsettling, hearing the old khajiit's twisted sense of humour at first. Though Ruby's and Yang's stories had given her some expectations as to what she might expect in the Shivering Isles, it would prove to be not enough when she finally met and chatted with Ra'shamarra for the first time that she was invited to New Sheoth. She seemed to switch from maniacal pranks, to threatening to do gruesome things with the viscera of those around her at the drop of a hat. At first, Summer thoroughly feared for what might be done to her, until she eventually realised that for all the graphic bluster and the disturbing images that Ra'shamarra could put into people's minds, she was genuinely nice to those that pleased her.

Summer's thoughts were broken by the insistent tapping of the whisk on the bowl in front of her. It had completed its task of beating the eggs, perhaps with a little more vigour than she had expected. Taking the bowl over to the flour-horn, she tossed the used whisk to a nearby gnarl, which began to 'lick' the whisk clean as it walked to the sink at the other side of the room.

"Mum, I think...I might need a bit of help?" Yang asked, balancing a stack of three bowls loaded with cookie dough.

"For shame, Yang! This one would have assumed that you would have learned basic telekinesis by now," chided J'Bari, who had just come down from the feast hall above and stuck out a hand, levitating the bowls and setting them down gently on the workbench.

"Hey! It's not that easy, you know," huffed Yang.

"Nonsense. One simply requires a little practice to have it done correctly. And...is something burning?"

Summer turned around to find Serana at the oven, holding on to a tray of something that must have been once some sort of square-shaped confectionery. Whatever it was, it was definitely blackened and burned to a crisp. She sighed as she handed the tray to a passing gnarl, who flinched and turned away from it as best as it could, even as it carried the tray to the sink.

"You know, Serana, not everything has to be cooked at high temperatures," Summer said, checking on what the vampire woman was doing. The air near the oven was searingly hot; sweat beaded her face as she approached. Out of curiosity, she picked up a nearby thermometer and held it to the oven's surface. She yelped in surprise when said thermometer exploded in her hand as soon as it even got near the oven, scattering bits of glass all over the place. "Yeah. That was...too high. Can we have this cleaned up? Turn off the oven as well?"

"Maybe I just can't do it," huffed Serana, slipping off her heatproof mitts.

"Yes you can. What's in that, anyway? That doesn't look like cookie dough to me,"

"It's...a powdered soul gem. I soaked it in a little bit of moonsugar rum, which made it somewhat workable, and then...well, I tried to bake it,"

Summer pulled a face when she heard that it was a soul gem. True, it was one of the few things that full vampires could eat without ill effects, but _why_ someone would make a confection out of such a vile ingredient was beyond her. Still, she had an idea about who it was for, and she would be damned before she would let Serana give up.

"Yeah, I know. It tastes disgusting on its own. But a little bit of illusory enchantment here and there, and it'd taste much better. I've tried it on the powder, but I just can't seem to get it to cook without burning. Maybe I should just give up,"

"No. You won't do that!" exclaimed Summer, whisking away the vampire woman and taking her back to the mortar and pestle in the corner. "Not everything has to be baked. How about making it into a jelly? Or...an iceblock?"

The vampire woman looked thoughtful. "That's...not a bad idea. Maybe I could just pour the mixture into a mould and then freeze it,"

"Exactly! There's no way it could burn or spoil. It's foolproof!"

Serana gave Summer one of her rare smiles. "Thank you, Summer. I think...I will do just that,"

It didn't take long before Serana had crushed another set of soul gems and added half a bottle of sweet-smelling rum to the resultant powder. Selecting a heart-shaped mould, the vampire poured the mixture in and sprayed it with a strong jet of frost from her hand, instantly freezing it.

"What? Is something wrong?" Serana asked, noticing the strange look that Yang was giving her.

"Uh...no, nothing. It's just...well, I never had you pegged for someone that would...yeah, not that particular mould. But whatever floats your boat!"

"You know, you're not the only one with a feline lover. I was going to give you a hint about what might make your cookie special for Blake. Really, really special, since it even affects Valeria. But on second thought, I think I won't," said Serana, smirking at Yang's horrified expression.

"No! I'm sorry! Please tell me?"

"Hmm...Only if you ask nicely,"

Whatever antics happened between the two after that, Summer paid little attention. One of the gnarls was tugging at her sleeve, insistently pointing at her unfinished cookie mixture. "Ah! Thanks for reminding me!" she cried out, rushing to the mixing bowl that she had neglected. The beaten eggs were starting to shrink; she snatched up the bowl and shook the flour-horn, making a cupful of flour fall into the mixture. "Ruby, when you're done, could you beat some butter and sugar for me?"

"On it, mum!" the little red-cloaked girl sang, catching a block of butter that Ra'shamarra tossed to her and beating it vigorously with a fork. A helpful cherry-tree gnarl added sugar to the mixture as she beat it, saving her from having to do it herself. Giggling, Ruby petted the tree-creature, which happily chirped as it dusted some more sugar into the bowl.

"You know, I really like her," Ra'shamarra purred from behind Summer, "Such an adorable cookie devourer! Why, she would always take the first of every batch of anything that I would bake. It makes me feel wanted. Not that I would need to feel wanted, of course, seeing as I can make anything happen in my realm. Including clowns that would kiss my feet, if I would so much as ask! Still feels nice, anyway,"

Summer nodded, smiling. It did feel rather heartwarming every time Ruby and Yang would take freshly-baked items that she had just baked, and ate them with broad grins on their faces and smears of chocolate on their cheeks. That was something that she did miss, quite a bit; and as long as she could remain in the Shivering Isles, she could have many more chances to see exactly that.

"Milady. You have a visitor at Passwall," a voice behind Ra'shamarra drawled, causing Summer to jump. Even though she had been a resident of New Sheoth for some time, it still unnerved her as to how Haskill could seemingly appear anywhere and know everything that was happening in all of the Shivering Isles. "Your daughter is coming. She appears to be rather...furious,"

Ra'shamarra blinked. "Furious? Furious?! Why, this is an outrage!" she shouted, waving a hand about absent-mindedly, "We're only baking, for Sanguine's sake!"

"Regardless, she will be at New Sheoth Palace in approximately thirty minutes. I have activated the anti-teleportation wards throughout all of the Shivering Isles, as your instructions were to keep this event private,"

"Well now! Aren't you a useful little ant! Yes, yes you are. For once, Haskill, you've done something that warrants a little praise. Go on, then! Have a little break. I and my guests still have more than a little work to do,"

The khajiit then turned to every person that was still in the kitchen. "Well then! The challenge has been issued. Let's show my daughter that we can throw a feast without my servants, shall we?"

* * *

By the time that Valeria arrived on the steps of New Sheoth Palace, she was beyond furious. Her mother – or more likely, Haskill – had set up wards throughout the entirety of the Isles, preventing her from quickly travelling anywhere. And so she was forced to ride a conjured direwolf the entire way from Passwall to Bliss, fighting hordes of gnarls, elytra and other wild denizens of the forests that seemed intent on impeding her every move. The exertion left her panting and exhausted, and when she took a sniff, she growled as she realised she absolutely _reeked_ of sweat and ashes.

The Golden Saints and Dark Seducers all saw fit to part ways to let her through, however; perhaps more keen on preserving their own lives than obeying whatever strange order that her mother had issued. They still, however, did not help her push open the heavy gates that led to New Sheoth's throne room, preferring to smirk in amusement as the frazzled khajiit heaved and pushed open its heavy iron gates.

"Mother! What is the meaning of this!?" she roared, fully expecting Ra'shamarra to be in her throne, grinning her insufferably irritating grin, and clapping slowly like a true madwoman.

Instead, she was greeted by the sight of Teams RWBY and JNPR, seated at a long dining table that had been set up in the throne room. Ruby was happily hand feeding Weiss a batch of bright white sugar biscuits; Blake looked about ready to rub her forehead and cheeks all over Yang, even as she was nibbling away at a strangely green biscuit in the blonde's hands. Pyrrha was on one knee, offering Jaune an oddly ring-shaped pastry with an extremely large diamond-shaped caramel chip wedged in its top; Ren and Nora were decidedly engrossed in devouring heart-shaped cookies and pancakes respectively. Summer, as expected, was sitting in a chair beside Ruby, giggling at some joke or another that Ra'shamarra told.

But what was strangest to her was the way that Serana was approaching her, with swaying hips – and a golden plate in her hands, three love-heart shaped jellies on it, coloured a dull, greyish brown.

"Pipe down, little kitten! You're disrupting everyone's activities!" shouted back Ra'shamarra, who was about to gnaw on a chewy chocolate cookie that Summer was offering.

"Indeed, darling. Perhaps you should calm yourself. You look so terrible after a _long_ journey," cooed Serana, looping an arm around Valeria's waist. "Here, why don't you have a taste of what we've been up to?"

Serana popped one of the heart-shaped jellies into her mouth and leaned into Valeria, as though for a kiss. Valeria's face heated up; was her lover trying to feed her like this? Resignedly, she accepted the half of the jelly that Serana was offering on her lips, fully expecting the bitter, chalky taste of soul gems.

But that did not come. Instead, her eyes lit up as she tasted a flavour that she had never tasted for the last fifteen hundred years.

"Chocolate," gasped Valeria breathlessly, staring in awe at the jellies. Her anger at being forced to fight her way to the palace was completely overwhelmed by a profound sense of wonder. "Chocolate, and the finest Mistralian Moonsugar Rum. How...? How is this even possible?"

"A little research goes a long way, my love. You've been so engrossed in researching ways to improve the military and the nation as a whole, you've ended up neglecting research on how to make things easier on yourself," whispered Serana, popping another jelly in between her lips and leaning in again. Choking and gagging noises came from both Teams RWBY and JNPR, while Summer let out an amused giggle and a snort. As did Ra'shamarra, who was stealthily recording the entire exchange with a hidden dataslate.

"Ah...an illusion spell, woven into the soul gems' powder. Of course. That would work," Valeria murmured as she chewed, realising how it worked. "So simple, and yet...so elegant,"

"Hush. You're really killing the mood, lover. Leave your work behind, at least for today. Should we get you cleaned up?" Serana chided, "Or rather, should I help you get clean?"

Valeria looked at Serana and cracked a small grin. "That sounds...wonderful. Mother, I suppose I must apologise for intruding like this,"

"Nonsense! If I didn't pretend I was abducting all your apprentices AND your soon-to-be wife, you wouldn't have come to this celebration!"

Celebration? Valeria's brow furrowed in confusion. Ra'shamarra groaned, as did Serana.

"Heart Day? The one day of the year that you're supposed to show affection to your wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend? Ah, but of course! You don't know about it, because you've forgotten about it! For the last fifteen hundred years!" Serana said exasperatedly, her shoulders slumping, "I've been patiently waiting for you to actually come to Winterhold to visit me, year after year, but you seem to have been too busy to even visit for this special day!"

Fifteen hundred years. Has it been that long since she showed much affection to Serana? Guilt tugged at her icy heart. An apology would not suffice; not to such a loyal companion of hers. No, she would have to make up for it. And she needed to start now.

"I apologise, my dear," Valeria said simply, giving Serana a small smile, "I may not have been available for you all these years, but that will change. That must change. And what better time to change than the present, hm? I believe that I know a few ways that I might be able to make it up to you,"

"Archcat!" whistled Yang, who gave her two thumbs up and a shit-eating grin, "As much as I like the show you're putting up, I think that you two need to take this somewhere else. I mean, Rubes and Ice Queen look like they're both about to burn a hole into the ground. Get a room, you two!"

Serana chuckled as she turned to face the white and red partners of Team RWBY. Sure enough, they were both blushing a bright vermilion, their faces cradled in their hands. "Sorry! We'll take it somewhere private. Enjoy the rest of Heart Day, you all!"

* * *

A/N:

A fluffy Valentine's Day special episode here! :D Hope that you guys/girls with partners enjoy it, and that you lavish your attentions on that special someone. Remember that it takes two to tango, and that one cannot receive without giving.

As per the previous special chapter, this is not in continuity with the rest of the story.


	31. 29 - Breaking Down the Barriers

"Ugh. I don't think I'll ever get used to that," groaned Weiss, clutching her temples as she stumbled around. Teleportation was still something that disoriented her thoroughly, as it did for RBY. The others were far less fortunate, having been literally fallen on their tailbones as they were roughly deposited by the impromptu portal that Ra'shamarra had conjured. One that led straight into what looked like an empty hangar aboard the Nirnian dreadnought, if the black metal floor was any hint.

"Ha! What a baby you are, little white rose," giggled the elder khajiit, "Why, even a baby would still be snoring after passing through _that_ little portal. I remember doing that a few times when my little kitten was literally still a kitten. Still suckling, if I remember right. And she still held her meal in!"

"Eww. Gross. Too much information, Auntie Ra'shamarra,"

"Really now? I don't think it was too much-"

"You must learn when it is permitted to speak of such...inappropriate matters, mother," grumbled Valeria, causing Ra'shamarra to pout. "J'Bari. I trust that your visit to the surface was...entertaining?"

"If by 'entertaining' you had meant full of interesting events, Your Majesty, then this one must say that it has been," purred J'Bari, who was helping Ruby up, "This one has had a most delicious meal of a bowl of thin, dense boiled bread—"

"Noodles," corrected Blake.

"Ah, that is what they are called? This one must read on how to make it. Yes...noodles, topped by a very large, very plump fish. It was most excellent,"

Valeria nodded slowly. "I shall trust your word on it, as you are well aware that I cannot taste such things any more without suffering terribly for it in the lavatory. Regardless, I am glad that you are safe. My agents on the surface have reported an increase in Grimm activity in the vicinity of Vale. Whether this relates to the assassin that we hunt or the White Fang that we have raided, we do not know yet,"

"You have...spies on the surface?" Weiss asked, raising an eyebrow. Valeria merely surveyed her incredulous look and shrugged.

"Invisibility spells are standard for my infiltrators, Miss Schnee. With your world being woefully inadequate in the magickal arts, they are undetectable," she responded, "However, I will reassure you that they are merely seeking to ensure that the rest of this festival goes without any disruptions,"

Still unsure whether or not to believe the empress, Weiss opted to remain silent. A part of her said that maybe she was planning something for the conclusion of the festival. Which, considering the khajiit's legendary vindictive streak, was more than likely. Regardless of her thoughts, she found herself hearing soft, padded footsteps coming in from around the corner outside of the hangar bay.

Footsteps that were drawing ever closer. Footsteps that were rather light to be an armoured person, as was common elsewhere in the ship. And considering Ruby's ever-growing smile, the little reaper knew exactly who it was.

Yang's jaw dropped, and she slowly lifted a trembling hand up, pointing shakily at the doorway. Blake tilted her head when she noticed her partner's tearing eyes and shocked expression, then decided to follow her gaze. "Oh...she looks...really like Ruby,"

"Mum?!" Yang choked out, stumbling to her feet and slowly walking towards the white-cloaked woman in disbelief. When the woman held out her arms and smiled back, Yang openly cried and dashed towards her, wrapping her arms around her long-lost mother with a bearlike grip.

"Yep! It's really me, Yang. Uh...could you loosen up a bit?" Summer gasped, feeling that her ribs would crack if the blonde brawler continued hugging. "Dust, you really have grown up. Just look at you!"

"Mum...! I...you...you're real? This is real?"

"This is definitely real, Yang," chuckled Summer, who pinched Yang on the cheek, "See? I'm real, and I'm right in front of you,"

"Where have you been? I thought you were...that you'd been _dead_! I mean, Rubes even visited your grave every year!"

"That...well, I think I'd better let Archmage Septim explain that to you," Summer sheepishly said, rubbing the back of her head, "Just know that I'm back, and I feel great! Better than ever, actually,"

"Indeed. You should not forget, however, of the sacrifice that your daughter has made in order to secure your resurrection," spoke Valeria darkly, pointing at Ruby's missing pinky finger, "A sacrifice of blood and flesh is more than a trivial matter. When necromantic arts are involved, the sacrificed parts will never regrow, even if given the attentions of a master healer,"

Noticing Weiss, Yang and Blake's shocked expressions – which all slowly morphed into abject disgust – Valeria growled and added, "If you must know, I was the unwilling assistant to Miss Rose's desires. She had invoked her rightfully-won favour, compelling myself to assist her with this wish of hers. A necromantic ritual awoke Summer Rose's soul and bound it back to the mortal plane, and an application of my Thu'um restored her physical form. But to truly merge the two together; to fuse body and soul, I required a blood sacrifice from one of Summer Rose's blood relatives. Specifically, that of her biological offspring. The less recent the death, the more blood and flesh would be required. And it is most fortunate that her death was still relatively recent,"

"That's...just wrong," Blake murmured, her face an ashen white.

"Indeed it is so, Miss Belladonna. I am glad that you see it that way,"

"But why keep this secret, Archcat?" Yang said, letting go of Summer and turning to face Valeria, "And can she come back with us? Dad hasn't seen mum in years now, and he's getting a tad lonely now,"

Summer giggled and put a hand over her mouth. "Oh, of course he'd be lonely. He couldn't keep his hands off me whenever I'm not on missions. Poor Tai,"

"Oooh. Oooh! Sounds exciting. Very exciting. If you want to go down there-"

"No, mother," Valeria said flatly, casting a silencing spell over Ra'shamarra. One that the elder khajiit had almost instantaneously removed. "I know your intentions. You will not take Summer Rose to her husband in Patch, as that is unimaginably dangerous for her – and for everyone else on that island,"

"Dangerous? How?! Mum wouldn't hurt anyone else!" Yang cried out, clenching her fists.

"Perhaps if you read your books instead of playing video games on your scroll, Miss Xiao Long, you would learn something of worth," Valeria spoke loudly, letting a little of her thu'um into her voice, "Look into her eyes. What do you see that should not be there?"

Yang paused for a moment, and then her eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. "They're...mum's eyes were silver, like Rubes...this...why? How?"

"The invoker of a necromantic ritual must use his or her own blood to write a binding contract to a willing Daedric greater power. In this case, it appears that my vampiric blood, along with the Daedric power that I had contracted, had caused a slight issue with your mother's resurrection. That issue being that Summer Rose is now truly a partial vampire. One of my own bloodline, no less,"

A heavy silence fell over the room, as Yang attempted to come to terms with what she had just been told. "So, do you uh...need to drink blood, or something?"

"I...can. It smells sweet, and it tastes like a really fruity wine to me," Summer admitted. But when Yang balked, she quickly added, "I don't have to! I mean, I only had some when Archmage Septim wanted to see if I had any reaction to it. I can just eat normal food, like you can or Ruby can,"

"Okay. Okay," Yang sighed in relief, "At least you're not a bloodsucking monster-"

"Ahem. I am standing right here, Miss Xiao Long," Valeria growled irritably, her arms crossed.

"But you don't drink blood, Archcat. That makes you different,"

"The point still stands-"

"-That my daughter still has a stick up her arse!" cried out Ra'shamarra in a strangely jovial manner. Team RWBY looked at her incredulously, while J'Bari groaned and rolled her eyes. "What? It's true, isn't it? Lighten up, kitten! You really are a bloodsucking monster. But you're _my_ little bloodsucking monster,"

If looks could kill, Valeria would have been guilty of matricide. Many times over. "...If that is your way of praising someone, I do pity the person that you insult, mother,"

"Ha! Pot calling the kettle black. Why would a pot call a kettle black, anyway? They don't have mouths! They don't even have a nose! They can't even speak! And besides, my ones are made of gold. They CAN'T BE BLACK!"

Noticing the deepening scowl on Valeria's face, Summer cleared her throat and said, "Ra'shamarra, I think that's enough. These arguments shouldn't be happening. You're mother and daughter! Why can't we all just get along over a delicious sugary cookie and a warm glass of milk?"

"I cannot eat mortal sustenance, Summer," sighed Valeria.

"Oh...that's right..."

"Ha! Unlike my daughter, I can do so. And I happily accept. Now, where are those cookies?"

"I, uh, haven't made them yet," admitted Summer, though she looked at Ruby and smiled, "Ruby, would you mind helping me make some cookies? I know how much you loved them when you were so, so little,"

Ruby's face immediately lit up and the little reaper began to bounce up and down excitedly. Blake and Weiss looked at each other in confusion, only for Blake to notice that Yang had a vacant, drooling expression on her face at the mention of Summer's cookies. "Are they...that good?" Blake asked tentatively, not sure about _why_ Yang and Ruby seemed to be so enamoured by the prospect of their mother's cookies.

"What? Are they good? _Are they good?!_ " Yang and Ruby both gasped, scandalised. Turning to their mother with deadly serious expressions on their faces, they demanded, "We can't just bake _one_ lot. We have to make some for Blake and Weiss!"

"Yeah, for sure. But I don't think the ship has a kitchen we could use...or does it?"

"No, Miss Xiao Long, it does not. Though I can command my kitchen crew to leave one of the kitchens empty, it is not well equipped for what you intend to do. Nor do I wish to incur their ire, for my own meals are disgusting enough as it is, without them surreptitiously giving myself poor quality wine,"

"But _my_ kitchens are. Well, what are you waiting for, children? Come with Auntie Ra'shamarra!" cackled the elderly khajiit, who waved her hand and conjured a portal leading to the all-too-familiar colourful palace in the Shivering Isles. Both Ruby and Summer yelped as they were dragged by their hands by a somewhat insane khajiit lady, while Blake wore a smirk as she quietly followed after them with J'Bari close behind.

"If I may have a word, Miss Schnee," Valeria spoke quietly, so that only Weiss could hear, "While Mrs. Rose asked my mother to bring you all here, I had my own reasons to ask for you to be brought to me. It has come to my attention that Atlas has made some form of golem in the likeness of a young woman, and infused her with a soul. Miss Penny Polendina, if I recall correctly,"

Weiss raised an eyebrow questioningly. "How did you...?"

"I have eyes and ears throughout Vale, Miss Schnee. And the fact that there seems to be always several guards around an otherwise innocuous looking young lady draws quite a significant amount of attention. But know that with the liminal barriers around my home plane of existence breached, the influences of Aurbis are beginning to seep into Remnant,"

"Influences of Aurbis? Do you mean...Oblivion?"

"Perceptive, as I would expect of my star student. Yes, the influences of Oblivion are beginning to manifest in Remnant. Even now, a mirror plane of Aetherius is beginning to form. I have seen it in my meditations at night. And to that end, it would be wise to not anger any of the Daedric Princes while I am unable to intervene. Your world does not yet have a Temple of the Nine where I may light the Dragonfires, and that would mean that should the powers of Oblivion choose to claim Remnant for their own, there would be nothing stopping them from tearing apart the faint traces of protection that I have placed upon this world,"

Weiss shuddered. The Oblivion Crisis was well-documented in the Imperial Library, and during her stay in the Imperial City she had quite a bit of time reading through the stories regarding that period. Needless to say, with so few cities present on Remnant and all of its wilderness completely inhospitable, an invasion by Mehrunes Dagon would _not_ be on the list of things she would ever want to see. It would not even be fit to call it an invasion; it would be a slaughter with no escape.

"So...what can we do?" Weiss asked, hoping that Valeria had a solution.

"Well, as it has occurred, I am familiar with two of the more benevolent powers of Oblivion. Three, if one could consider my mother a benevolent power, but whether that is so remains debatable. Regardless, I have petitioned both Lady Azura and Lady Meridia for assistance with protecting Remnant from the powers of Oblivion. Azura had refused, citing that she had other pressing issues to attend to at this time. However, Meridia has informed me that she is willing to distract the other Daedric powers until I can erect a permanent barrier,"

"I'm sensing that there's a catch in this? It's not like they do anything for free,"

"Quite so, Miss Schnee. You are, of course, aware of Meridia's sphere of influence. The protection and preservation of life. The creation of golems with living souls is something of a sore spot for her, and it would be wise to desist from creating any more creatures like Miss Polendina. For now, as your world is still ignorant of her presence, she is willing to overlook these transgressions. However, be warned that she retains a vendetta against those who have offended her. Sometimes for hundreds of years on end,"

"I...see," Weiss murmured, thinking about what in Oum's name she could possibly do to convince the Atlesian Council to stop all research into Aura-infused androids, on the grounds that a supposed deity had taken offense to that particular line of research. Which was, to those uninitiated to the mystical realms of Nirn, an absurd and ludicrous concept. "Thanks for letting me know about this...I suppose?"

"For now, you have little to worry. I am merely informing you of what must happen in the next few decades, should Remnant's continued survival be desired. Go on, join the rest of your team in the Shivering Isles. I daresay that Miss Rose would appreciate your company,"

"Okay, then. Aren't you coming along?"

Valeria's eye twitched as she suppressed an angry sigh. "No. While I will tolerate my mother, I would much prefer my sanity intact. In any event, I must go and give the Sixth Legion an...inspirational speech,"

She said the last two words with such revulsion that Weiss could not help but chuckle. "I take it you aren't fond of speeches?"

"I despise them more than you can imagine, Miss Schnee. But a monarch's work is never done,"

* * *

"Cookies! Cookies for EVERYONE!" laughed Ra'shamarra, collecting a plate of the delicious baked sweets from Summer's hands and popping one in her mouth. "Mmm! How delicious. I would never tire of eating these!"

"And there's plenty more where that came from!" Summer giggled, barely holding back laughter as she watched Ruby shovel in cookie after cookie from her plate.

"Ruby, could you...act a little more civilised?" grumbled Weiss, who was beet red with embarrassment as she watched her partner munch on a particularly large and chunky cookie with her mouth open.

"Sowwy Weiph!" she mumbled out, her mouth still packed full with cookie.

"Did she just call Weiss 'wife'?" Blake commented, smirking. The comment had its desired effect; Ruby froze and choked, struggling to swallow, while Weiss looked absolutely mortified. "That would explain the comment she made on that day of that food fight,"

"Yep! What was that that she said? 'Sisters, friends...wife'?"

"She never said that, you brute!" Weiss cried out, clenching her hands around the hem of her skirt and staring at the floor.

Ruby swallowed what was left of her cookie and pouted. "Yaaaaang! I didn't say anything like that!"

"Suuuure. I'm sure everyone else heard it, right? What about Team JNPR? They'd back me up on this,"

"Speaking of which, wasn't Team JNPR supposed to have a match soon? Like, right after us?" Blake said, pulling out her scroll and checking the time. "Oh. We missed their match,"

"Wait, if we missed their match...what about our team's? We were supposed to be up against that team from Atlas Academy before them, weren't we?"

"Uh...yeah...about that," Blake said, flicking her cat ears behind her ribbon, "It looks like they forfeited for some reason. So we've just been pushed ahead to the singles round without an actual fight,"

"How dreadfully boring!" groaned Ra'shamarra, "And here I was thinking that because you all went to a combat academy, that you'd be able to show me something interesting to watch! You know; blood, guts, explosions, fireballs! That sort of thing,"

"The Vytal Festival isn't a bloodsport, Ra'shamarra," said Summer, pursing her lips as she picked up another platter of strawberry pastries from a passing gnarl, "They fight, but because of our Auras and the safety measures in place, severe injuries generally don't happen. Still, I'm curious about this match. From what I heard from Valeria, Team JNPR is another promising team from Beacon. Do you happen to have a scroll feed from the Amity Colosseum, by any chance?"

"Do I? DO I?! Of course I do, you foolish little twit," the elderly khajiit said flippantly. Raising her hand, she threw a ball of purple energy at the centre of the long table in the dining hall, causing it to be shrouded in darkness. For a moment, there appeared to be nothing but blackness; but soon after, the darkness lifted, revealing a translucent of the Amity Colosseum, along with all the sounds coming from the arena. "Now, let's see what's all the fuss all about. If it's not worth my time, I might just drown the festival grounds. And the colosseum, too. Nice that they shaped it like a bowl. Makes it that much easier,"

"Drown it?" Summer asked, confused, "It's in the middle of a park in Vale. How would you drown that? With water?"

"You're just thinking like Haskill. And Haskill is a dull man. Don't be like Haskill. What, did you think that I meant drowning it in water? I could do that, but that would be just _boring_. No, last time I drowned my daughter's laboratory, I did it with-"

"Baked stuff. Delicious stuff. Cookies!" Ruby cried out, throwing her arms up in the air excitedly, while the rest of Team RWBY groaned.

"Cookies?"

"Long story," Blake spoke, cautiously eyeing Ra'shamarra, "Let's just say that we didn't eat anything but pastries for a couple of weeks,"

"And neither did half the students," added Yang, shuddering as she recalled the way that the shared students' kitchen was packed with all manner of bread, pies and cakes for an age and a half. Nora practically lived in there for a week, munching away on everything that she could get her hands on.

A loud horn interrupted their conversation, however; and immediately afterwards, the pompous voice of Professor Port blared out from the projection of Amity Colosseum.

"It looks like our first contender is...Penny Polendina, from Atlas! And her opponent will be...Pyrrha Nikos, from Beacon!"

* * *

A/N:

Diverging from RWBY canon here for a bit. Penny vs Pyrrha will be before Yang vs Mercury.

Dragon Man 180: Ra'shamarra has no reason to do that. Remember that Ra'shamarra is, at the end of the day, Sheogorath - and a Daedric Prince never does anything for free. Their motives are largely unknowable, but there is no direct benefit for Ra'shamarra to grab Taiyang and bring him to Summer, and thus Ra'shamarra does not do so. The antics of Team RWBY provides entertainment, and unknowingly, Ruby herself *is* slightly touched by madness, therefore endearing her to the Daedric Princess.

As for the soul gems, they do not exactly taste like the creatures they have come from. It's more like tasting burnt ashes of the creature in question, with a very faint hint of what it might have tasted while it was alive. And with a touch of illusion magic, as with the previous special chapter, it is entirely possible to make it taste better.

Next up, Penny vs Pyrrha. *tosses coin to determine whether Penny lives or dies*


	32. 30 - Man-Machine Interface

Deception was not one of Valeria's strong suits. Dishonourable conduct with honourable parties always left a bitter taste to her, having spent a rather large part of her life in the company of honourable Nords; and lying to her apprentices about what she had to do was precisely that. She had no inspirational speech to give to the Sixth Legion, for that unenviable task was left to the general of the legion itself.

Rather, the task that she had at hand was...slightly more important. The news of a synthetic lifeform being present on Remnant was worrying. The Geth back home had pledged their loyalty to the Empire, having been disowned by their still-unrepentant creators. So far, the synthetic creatures have been nothing less than model citizens of the Empire, seemingly ecstatic with merely having their sapience reaffirmed. However, they had been created as servants to their original creators, and their original directive still ordered them to assist their masters, in whatever way they were required. Provided, of course, it did not require the synthetics to destroy themselves.

The feminine synthetic that was named Penny, however...she was an entirely new lifeform. Not a collection of minor white souls forming a greater whole, as the Geth were; but a fully-fledged, wholly synthetic soul. She was even capable of generating Aura! Something entirely unheard of when created by technological means – but entirely within the realm of necromantic bindings. While golems were simply animated by the power of a soul gem, they did not truly possess a soul of their own; they were dead, only capable of whatever simple instructions had been issued to them. Synthetics created through tampering with the souls of the dead, however, intruded on the sacred realm of Meridia.

Something which the jealous Daedric Princess of Life protected very, very closely.

Producing a bottle of refined glow dust, Valeria bit the tip of her finger and watched as a fine droplet of blood appeared. Carefully, she inscribed a summoning glyph on the floor of her suite, and then poured the glow dust on it after she had finished.

"Meridia. I require your immediate attention," she called out, shielding her eyes from the blindingly bright that always came with summoning Meridia.

From the light stepped out the shapely form of a slender woman. Her long, blonde tresses were seemingly lit by an inner fire, while her inhumanly flawless ivory skin was draped in nearly-transparent delicate silks. "Valeria. I had wondered when you would speak to me again," she spoke coldly, her blazing white irises glaring angrily into Valeria's own, "Or rather, whether you would _dare_ to summon me at all. Have you come to apologise for violating the terms of our truce? Would you so willingly throw away the alliance we have forged over hundreds of years, for the sake of a mere woman who you have never known?"

Valeria suppressed a grimace. That wager of hers was starting to prove very, very troublesome. "I do apologise for that transgression. However, in my defense, I had offered a mere youngling a wager, which I had lost,"

"And how does this relate to your use of a forbidden necromantic ritual?" Meridia spoke, her tone still menacing.

"My wager was...I offered to grant a single wish to her, provided it was not for evil purposes. Never did I imagine that she would ask for something of the sort. I am honour-bound to honour every agreement, as you are well aware; and this puts myself at a truly unenviable position of having to break at least one agreement,"

"And? You had believed that our alliance was less important than the affairs of a single mortal? You are foolish, Valeria. The agreements between immortals transcend those of mortals. While every life is precious, their wishes are as fleeting as their lives,"

To that, Valeria truly had no answer. She pursed her lips, trying to think of an answer – until she heard Meridia giggling.

The Daedric Princess of Life, giggling like a schoolgirl.

"Oh, Valeria," she laughed, her lips curling into a smile, "You should have seen your own expression. Do you truly think that our agreement – and our alliance – which has lasted for hundreds of years, would be so easily destroyed? I know that you have kept your word for all these centuries, enforcing it among your subjects with a zealousness I have never witnessed in any other mortal that still walks upon Nirn. For this transgression, I am willing to overlook it, just this once,"

Valeria breathed a sigh of relief. Meridia was not usually the most forgiving of Daedric Princes, and her punishments could last months or years. Or even decades, in the case of a certain lich that dared to call himself the King of Worms.

"...But don't think that you have escaped all punishment, my ally. I would say that Clavicus would be greatly amused by this news," continued the goddess, whose smirk grew ever wider as Valeria's look of relief morphed into that of horror. "Why, the Empress of the Nirnian Empire, Scion of Coldharbour, outwitted by a mere mortal girl? His amusement would last for _weeks_! And I have little doubt that Sanguine would find it a most worthy tale to regale his guests with at his dinner parties,"

"You wouldn't dare!" growled Valeria, clenching her fists. Her reputation would be _ruined_! Cunning, strength and impeccable intelligence were required to be taken seriously among the greater powers of Oblivion. It would take _years_ to rebuild her reputation, should word of this go to the wrong ears!

"I am most insulted that you would think I would so easily forgive, Valeria. Ordinarily, I would have demanded far more than your reputation among the Princes for breaking an oath of alliance. Let us leave it at that, and resume our prior relationship. Now, I am aware that you are not one to call for immediate attention if it was not of dire importance,"

Swallowing any further words of anger that she would have spoken, she closed her eyes and calmed herself down. "I have found something that is truly disturbing. A golem exists upon Remnant that appears to contain a black soul. Normally, in Nirn, this would be suspected necromancy, and I would send my inquisitors to deal with it as they see fit. However, the men of Remnant are largely ignorant of magic, and thus I highly believe that this golem was not born of necromantic rituals,"

"I see. A most intriguing discovery. Go on,"

"If the golem's soul was not bound into its body by necromantic rituals, but was created from nothingness, then is it an affront to yourself? Must I seek its destruction, in accordance with our pact regarding necromantic artifacts and creations?"

Meridia stroked her chin and paced about. "A...difficult position. The Geth of your Empire are not creations of necromantic rituals, and have come about through their own means. A happy accident of technology. They are no more an affront to myself than any child born of a mother in your Empire. Why, some of them have accepted my Light and have constructed altars to my glory upon their world, when I had revealed myself to them. They are as much my children as any other child of your Empire,"

Meridia then turned to pick up a crystal sphere from Valeria's desk, rolling it in her hands thoughtfully. "However, a soul bound into a construct by force is twisted in agony as it is coerced to remain behind, controlling a body which was never theirs. Do you have any further information regarding the golem?"

"If you meant whether the golem had a soul forcibly bound into it, magickally or otherwise, I have no further reports from my agents,"

"Then what must be done is clear. Determine whether this golem has a tormented soul. If it does, then you must destroy it. The laws of nature transcend those of any nation. If it does not, then it is a living creature like any other, and should be spared. This is, however, quite a substantial discovery. You have my gratitude for bringing this to my attention, Valeria,"

"Does this gratitude also extend to buying your silence regarding my...failure?" Valeria asked hopefully, to which Meridia chuckled as she replaced the crystal sphere.

"That remains to be seen. I am not so cruel as to antagonise, without good reason, one of the few who have remained faithful to my instructions for longer than an age. Prove yourself worthy of my trust in the coming months, and I may just forget about your indiscretion,"

"Excellent," purred Valeria, "That would be all that I have to discuss for now, my ally. May your realm remain ordered, and may your followers be legion,"

"Thank you. May your Empire remain true to my Light,"

With a blinding flash, Meridia vanished from Valeria's suite, leaving the Empress to plot out what she should do next. Deciding that perhaps it was best to communicate with the golem with a synthetic, she pulled a dataslate from her pocket and dialled the bridge.

"Admiral Servilius, I require you to send a message to the armoury. I require a Prime platform to come with me to the aft transport hangar, preferably with a complement of lesser trooper platforms as escorts,"

* * *

"Sal-u-tations, Pyrrha Nikos! It's an honour to finally meet you!" Penny cheerfully said, bouncing on the balls of her feet like she normally did. "This is going to be so much fun!"

Pyrrha, however, had things on her mind other than the tournament. She didn't acknowledge the overly-happy android girl. Rather, she was clenching her fists rather tightly, pondering over her answer to a most important question that Ozpin had asked before. To anyone that had seen the humble Mistralian champion fight before, this was most unlike her.

But she did not have so great a burden to bear as she did at that very moment.

She looked to the stands for support. A conspicuous gap beside Team JNPR's seats in the stand showed her that her friends in Team RWBY were absent. Where they were during the tournament was anybody's guess; the last that she had seen of them was Weiss dragging Ruby along with the rest of her team, with J'Bari limping along after them as fast as the crippled khajiit could. A little bit of sadness crept into her heart, but was swiftly banished when she heard Doctor Oobleck begin the countdown.

"Three!"

"Two!"

"One!"

"Begin!"

She slipped into tournament mode. This was a fight like any other. No more, no less.

The audience was just a distraction for her. They may as well be silent, no matter how loudly they scream in excitement.

Raising her sword and shield, she narrowed her eyes and focused on Penny's weapons. A set of eight blades, seemingly held aloft by nothing; though a brief use of her Semblance caused her to raise an eyebrow.

There were very thin, very strong wires connecting them to Penny, almost like how a puppeteer would control his or her puppets. Yet for the life of her, she could not see where they were being held.

Meaning that she could not easily disarm her opponent. Gritting her teeth, she charged in towards the Atlesian android, parrying single blades as they were thrown. But those single blades were thrown ever more quickly, forcing her to back away before she could even land a single strike on Penny.

"Oh-ho! What a splendid display of offensive skill by Miss Polendina! Quite a magnificent barrage of attacks, forcing Miss Nikos on the defensive!" Port commented, to the thunderous applause of the gathered crowd.

If Penny's growing smile was any indication, she was greatly entertained by this match. And if she were being entertained, Pyrrha was not one to disappoint. There was a reason why she was called the 'Invincible Girl', after all – and a reason why she was the four-time champion of the Mistral Tournament. She would not back down from a challenge so easily.

Gathering power in her Semblance, she wrapped her sword and shield in metal-repelling fields. It was much easier to deflect projectiles if they were simply pushed away from her shield, after all. Something which proved decidedly true as she began her counterattack on Penny.

"And Miss Nikos proves once again that she is a formidable fighter! Just take a look at those perfectly executed parries and those masterful strikes of her sword. It's as though Miss Polendina's many swords aren't helping her much!"

Many swords. Eight were difficult enough to block for her, but it brought a smile to Pyrrha's face that someone could actually prove to be a challenge to her. Penny brought all of the swords to strike at Pyrrha at blinding speeds. The red-haired duelist only barely managed to block the powerful blow, though even her shield was sent flying to one corner of the arena by the sheer force of the impact.

 _I can't block another hit like that,_ Pyrrha thought to herself, even as she summoned the shield back to herself. Her Semblance drained her Aura with every use, and that block had cost her a good chunk of it.

"One cannot simply attack all the time. For a corpse, burned by spellfire, cannot ever fight back. It is imperative that one must learn to defend," Pyrrha muttered to herself, recalling the advice that Valeria had given to the whole magicka class during their introduction to combat spells.

Motionlessly, she willed a barrier to form a sphere around her. Magicka barriers were not as protective as Aura-based or Semblance-based ones against physical weapons, but at the very least they didn't drain Aura as they were used. Another four blades impacted against the barrier, which flashed as they deflected each blade; but the lightweight blades veered off away from Pyrrha, just as she had hoped.

A slight headache worked its way into her mind, and she swore that her shield and sword appeared to warp. Blinking once, twice, she cleared her vision, and found that her weapons were absolutely normal. But when she looked up at Penny, she gasped in shock as the eight blades multiplied into dozens, then probably hundreds. There had to have been enough to cover the entirety of the colosseum, given how it was blotting out every light that was shining upon the arena floor!

Blotting out every light? Or was that the sun that was being blocked out by millions of blades? She didn't know for sure. It could have been a luminous wheel of cheese in the air studded by dozens of knives, for all she knew.

"No...way," she gasped, taking a step back. Penny smiled and raised her hand; the blades righted themselves and all pointed towards Pyrrha. Pyrrha knew that her magickal barriers could block four, maybe five blades; but hundreds? It may as well not exist.

However, something strange caught her attention. Where there was once a headache, a slight wave of clarity passed over her, and she noticed that the hundreds of blades flickered in and out of existence, as though they were not there. Only the eight that were hovering behind Penny remained solid, causing the duelist to tilt her head in confusion. A sudden wave of nausea struck her again, causing her vision to swim and blur.

"What's going on?" she slurred, trying to make sense of what she was experiencing. The blades were there, and yet were not there; but at the rate that they were speeding towards her, she would soon be impaled. She needed to make a decision, and _fast_.

* * *

"Mother!" Valeria roared, bursting into the throne room of New Sheoth Palace through an inordinately large portal. "The team – Team RWBY. Where are they?"

"Right here, Archcat. We're watching the first of the finals matches," Yang asked nonchalantly, poking her head up from behind the mountain of fluffy pink beanbags that filled the throne room. Her expression, however, turned to confusion when she noticed the grim expression on Valeria's face. "What's going on? What's with the full armour that you're wearing?"

"There is an emergency in the arena. Three of my agents are present in the stands, and they detected an extraordinarily powerful illusion spell being cast on Miss Nikos,"

"Wait, what? She's doing fine though," commented Ruby, who took another look at the holographic display in front of her. Pyrrha was deflecting every one of the swords being hurled at her by Penny; despite the vicious barrage of blows, she had yet to take a single direct hit.

Weiss, however, narrowed her eyes. She noticed that Pyrrha was swinging her shield with far more strength than normal. Especially considering the light weight of each of Penny's blades, last time she asked the android to show her one of her flying swords. "No. This isn't normal. Pyrrha doesn't waste energy like that. She's throwing her shield around like she's blocking at least a dozen swords at a time,"

"You're right. This isn't normal," Blake added, catching on to the heiress' comment.

"That would be due to the fact that Miss Nikos is currently experiencing a very powerful bit of illusion magic – or a Semblance analogue of it, at the very least," growled Valeria through gritted teeth, "Three of my Inquisitors in the stands are attempting to counteract it as best they can by casting calmative and mind-numbing spells at Miss Nikos, but it is also causing her concentration to drop. The danger of either her or her opponent doing permanent harm to each other is very great at this point,"

"What? Why would anyone interfere with a match like this?" Ruby cried out, jumping up.

"I do not know, but I have attempted to contact Headmaster Ozpin to stop the match. All direct communications to and from Vale's CCT to the Amity Colosseum have been jammed by something,"

"Can't your agents tell them to stop or something? I mean, they're already there, aren't they?"

"No. The mental assault on Miss Nikos is too powerful, and it requires all their attention to cancel out the damage caused by this rogue's Semblance. And in any event, they would simply be thrown out for attempting to interfere with a match," Valeria spoke, impatiently tapping her staff on the marble floor. "But now is not the time for these discussions! I am not familiar with the Amity Colosseum's layout, while you are. I need an image to teleport myself down there and stop this match, before something truly regrettable happens!"

"Okay. Team RWBY, let's go!" Ruby said.

Ra'shamarra giggled excitedly and snapped her fingers; instantly, Team RWBY found their weapons in their hands. "Well, this looks like it's going to be so much more fun than just watching! You get front-row seats to whatever madness is about to happen. I'm almost jealous!"

"Mother. This is not a matter to be joked about," sighed Valeria, "One of you girls, take my hand and picture a location in the Amity Colosseum. Summer, you are to return to my suite until we return,"

"But I can help my girls if something goes wrong!" protested the white-cloaked reaper, who was promptly silenced by Valeria's glare.

"No. Your soul is still improperly bound to your body. Of what I recall of Remnant's fighting styles, your usage of Aura – an outward projection of your soul's energy – may very well rip your soul from your body, if it is tested too early. Remain in my ship. This is not negotiable,"

"Sorry, mum, but I think you'll have to trust her on this one. I mean, she _kinda_ knows what she's talking about when it comes to souls. They're her snacks, you know," Yang said apologetically, though she flashed an unabashed grin when she heard an irritated grumble from Valeria.

"Fine. I'll stay back. Just...stay safe, yeah?"

"We will, mum,"

Waving goodbye to everyone present, Summer stepped through the portal back to the _Wrath of Talos_. A metallic clang and a pained yelp later, and they were treated to a sight of Summer jumping up and down in pain, clutching at her toe.

"Summer-Visitor. We apologise for the collision," a deep, warbling synthetic baritone called out. A gigantic golden synthetic stepped through the giant portal, bowing down as it stepped through. Ignoring the shocked gawks that every member of Team RWBY were giving it, it turned to face Valeria and nodded, "Valeria-Empress. This platform is ready to serve. The additional trooper platforms requested were not able to be present on time,"

"At the very least you are present, Infinity. I pray to the Nine that we will not require any additional firepower," she spoke. Closing her eyes, she focused on a spot in the Amity Colosseum – a tunnel or corridor of sorts, if the cold grey walls without end were any indication – and conjured a portal.

Yang was the first to recover from shock. "What the hell is this thing?" she croaked out hoarsely, looking up at the gigantic synthetic. It had a black-and-gold chassis, seemingly made of the same armour plating material as the rest of the military starships of the Empire. Its frame towered well over all of them, standing perhaps nine feet tall, though a gigantic shoulder-mounted cannon easily added another foot and a half onto its already considerable height.

What could only be described as eyebrow flaps raised themselves on hearing Yang's apparent confusion. "Yang-Student. This Prime platform is designated Infinity," it droned, its one flashlight eye shining on the blonde. "State your enquiry,"

"Uh, are you asking if I have a question? I don't have a question, I guess. But what is a Prime platform, anyway?"

"Enquiry detected. A Prime platform is a command chassis for Geth runtimes, designed as a mobile command unit for field use,"

"Team RWBY. The portal is now open and stabilised. Go through, find Professor Ozpin, Port or Doctor Oobleck, and request them to terminate the tournament," Valeria interrupted them, grimacing. A question-and-answer session could wait for later. "Infinity, you are to support them if anything goes wrong. Ruby Rose, the girl in the black-and-red battledress is the team's leader. Follow her, and follow her instructions until further notice,"

"Directive processed. Designating organic humanoids as friendly. Observing and escorting humanoid designated 'Ruby-Student',"

"Go, all of you. I shall follow you soon,"

As she watched Team RWBY and Infinity walk through the portal to Amity Colosseum, she could not help but notice the way that J'Bari was looking at her. She took a sniff of the air and her ears immediately flattened to her skull.

"J'Bari. You will remain on the ship and ensure that Summer Rose does not get into mischief," she ordered J'Bari, her fury rising. Khajiit pheromones never lied. The air was thick with the scent of a rebellious adult. "Now, if you will,"

J'Bari snapped off an insincere salute and stalked off through the portal back to the ship, leaving behind a fuming Valeria. She was the alpha, the head of the family – and she would not tolerate her daughter disrespecting her like that. There were words to be had later. But for now, she had a match to stop, before a disaster happened.

* * *

Pyrrha was thoroughly confused and exhausted. One moment she had a blistering headache, and another had her mind swimming in a sea of blissful tranquility. Only to have the tranquility broken after a few seconds, replaced by overwhelming nausea. And then the cycle would repeat again, and again, and again. It was a wonder that she had not passed out by now, being assaulted by hundreds of blades at a time.

Or was it really hundreds? She tried to recall the times where her thoughts were truly calm, and there were only eight blades. Every time her shield made contact with those, she felt the impact. She could see them bounce back. And yet, every time she saw hundreds, she swore there was no impact from the blades – but there was a definite impact when one of the flying baguettes struck her shield, ringing oddly like she had struck metal and not bread.

Her mind was once again assaulted by a fresh wave of nausea, and she dove to the floor to avoid another wave of blades – and eight baguettes. Calmness overtook her, and the hundreds of blades vanished, and the baguettes turned into blades. Staggering to her feet, she willed her shield to her side once again, and bashed aside the baguette-blades as they rushed back towards her from behind.

She couldn't continue like this. Whatever is happening, she needed to end this match, right then.

Summoning her Semblance's power again, she prepared for a single overwhelming strike. When there were hundreds of blades, surely she could block them all with one gigantic repulsive pulse. And sure enough, when her headache returned, the hundreds of blades reappeared once more, rushing towards her. She was ready this time, and sent out a gigantic repelling pulse.

The blades were hurled back at speeds greater than she had anticipated. Surely hundreds of blades could not be so light as to be thrown back like mere paperweights in a storm? But whatever doubts she had about whether the hundreds of blades were real were answered as she saw the effect of her Semblance on Penny.

Or rather, her Semblance on Penny's swords and wires. Pyrrha watched in horror as the wires wrapped themselves around Penny's arms and legs – and even one around her midsection. The blades, still travelling at tremendous speeds, were hardly slowed when the wires could no longer tighten around Penny's limbs; instead, the wires simply sliced through her metal limbs and body as though it were nothing more than tissue paper.

Pyrrha dropped her weapons in shock as she registered what had happened. The crowd's gasps of horror and disbelief were little more than passing winds to her. There, on the ground, lay the dismembered remains of a girl – an android, but still a girl. And she was the one that did it.

A murderer.

The Invincible Girl was a murderer.

So shocked was she that she barely noticed the swift approach of Team RWBY from the direction of the changerooms, with Archmage Septim and a strange, gigantic synthetic behind her.

* * *

" **Meyye! Mey joorre!** " shouted Valeria, rushing as fast as she could towards Penny. She saw the blades fly over and around the synthetic girl, but was far too late to stop her from being dismembered by her own control wires. Crouching down, she glanced at the sparking wires on what was left of the girl's upper torso. The girl's eyes were rapidly switching in and out of focus, and greenish-white fluid was leaking out of every stub of her limb.

She was no mechanic or engineer by any means, but from what she understood, machines ran on electricity. The sparks being emitted from the largest, thickest wires running down the girl's 'spine' looked as though they could take quite a bit of power. Taking a deep breath, she conjured the smallest, weakest stream of sparks from her own fingers, carefully guiding it to touch the ends of the frayed cables.

The effect was immediate. Her eyes brightened slightly, remaining slightly more in focus. An application of some chilling cold to the stumps of her limbs sealed the leaks, albeit temporarily. As Valeria ramped up the electrical stream from her fingers, she looked to Infinity for a solution.

"Infinity! I require your assistance!" Valeria cried out.

The giant Geth platform stooped over and focused on the remains of Penny's upper torso, scanning it quickly.

"Valeria-Empress. This synthetic platform's physical integrity is severely compromised," it stated simply.

"I am well aware of that, Infinity. Is there something that you can do to preserve it?"

"Negative, Valeria-Empress. This platform is not equipped with repair equipment. Geth simply transfer to another platform when one is irreparably damaged, and thus field repair equipment have been found to be unnecessary,"

Transferring to another platform. That only worked for Geth!

Valeria gritted her teeth in frustration. She had an alliance to maintain with Meridia; one that required her to destroy this synthetic if it proved to be created by the forced transfer of a soul, or to preserve it if it was not. If it perished and it was a genuine synthetic with an unbound soul that was undiagnosed, Meridia would likely find her efforts inadequate. And yet, if this was a synthetic with a bound soul and she preserved its life, Valeria could simply dispose of the corrupted synthetic later. She needed to preserve its life, one way or another.

Then a stroke of brilliance struck the archmage.

Infinity was the first Geth Prime platform created through Nirnian magitech. It possessed a core of a massive synthetic soul gem which acted as its heart. Even its chassis was forged of an alloy infused by crushed soul gems, allowing it to act as a true living creature, though made of hundreds if not thousands of souls.

One that always had room for souls to come and go as they pleased.

"Infinity. Begin soul transfer procedures, on this damaged synthetic. Immediately," she ordered. The Prime platform raised its one eye-flap, but otherwise complied.

The last thing that Penny saw before darkness took away her visual sensors was a gigantic metal hand looming over her, crackling with some dark purple force field.

* * *

A/N

So, I flipped a coin - and it landed side-on in my bowl of noodles and stayed like that. It was neither heads nor tails.

Penny is now a confirmed Schrodinger's Cat experiment!

So, this story is winding down to a close as the Battle of Beacon is approaching. Time for explosions! And more explosions! Did I mention explosions? ... ... Sheogorath, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!

LordMesirix: You bet Meridia is pissed off at Valeria. But Daedric Princes all have twisted senses of humour. Even the 'good' ones...


	33. 31 - The Fall

Ruby could hardly believe what she was seeing.

There, in the middle of the arena, was Penny's dismembered body. Pieces of her were scattered all over the stone floor, and fragments of her wire-controlled blades lay strewn haphazardly about the place. The giant synthetic – Infinity – stooped over what remained of her body, while Valeria was channelling lightning into an exposed bunch of thick power cables hanging from Penny's 'spine'. From what she could see, Penny's eyes were unfocused, her green irises wide open in shock. Eventually, however, Infinity stopped channelling the purple glow from its three-fingered hands; Valeria also halted her lightning spell, shaking her head slowly.

"Penny...no!" cried out Ruby, though she was drowned out by the spectators' horrified screams when they realised what had truly happened in that match. The vast screens placed on top of the stadium were still zoomed in on Penny's body for some reason, adding to the weight of the tragedy that had happened.

Silence fell on the arena, however, when the screens abruptly cut out to a blank red screen, emblazoned with a black queen chess piece.

"This is not a tragedy," Cinder's voice spoke, in an almost gleeful tone, "This was not an accident. This is what happens when you hand over your trust, your safety, your children, to men who claim to be our guardians. But who are, in reality, nothing more than men. Our Academies' headmasters wield more power than most armies, and one was audacious enough to control both,"

Valeria shifted slightly, her eyes narrowed on the stands. Following her gaze, Ruby saw General Ironwood, looking absolutely livid as he stormed away from the VIP box.

"They cling to this power in the name of peace, and yet, what do we have here? One nation's attempt at a synthetic army, mercilessly torn apart by another's star pupil,"

"Valeria-Empress, the soul transfer is complete. Penny-Synthetic has been inducted into the Consensus," Infinity spoke, "We do not see an issue with Penny-Synthetic's original form being torn apart. A replacement platform would be sufficient to restore her to her previous condition,"

Sighing, Valeria cradled her face. There were simply some things that Geth still do not understand properly – such as the fact that non-synthetics generally equate the dismemberment of a body to death. After all, organics did not have the luxury of having multiple identical platforms to transfer to if their bodies were destroyed.

"We believe our assessment was correct, yet Valeria-Empress shows signs of disapproval. Was our assessment incorrect?"

"It...lacks nuance. I shall explain later,"

"What need would Atlas have for a soldier disguised as an innocent little girl? I don't think the Grimm can tell the difference,"

"But she wasn't a soldier! She isn't a soldier!" Ruby ranted indignantly, stamping her feet.

"And what, I ask you, is Ozpin teaching _his_ students? A method to slay another student? Huntsmen and Huntresses should carry themselves with honour and mercy, and yet I have witnessed neither,"

"A cowardly villain without a face has no right to comment on honour, nor mercy," growled Valeria, her hands gripping her staff ever tighter.

"Perhaps Ozpin felt as though defeating Atlas in the tournament would help people forget about his colossal failure to protect Vale, when Faunus-driven attack nearly managed to blow half of Vale to pieces. Or perhaps this was his message to the tyrannical dictator that has occupied an unsuspecting kingdom with armed forces. Honestly, I haven't the slightest clue as to who is right and who is wrong. But I know the existence of peace is fragile, and the leaders of our kingdoms conduct their business with iron gloves,"

Valeria noticed that the crowd, though nearly silent before, was starting to hum with low murmurs. There was a palpable sense of dismay, and from what she knew of the Grimm, they were drawn to negative emotions. Emotions which were running high in the stadium at the moment; and considering that this was likely broadcast everywhere in Remnant, it was likely that even the citizens of every city was starting to panic. A very, _very_ good way to draw in massive amounts of Grimm.

"As someone who hails from Mistral, I can assure you that the situation there is... _equally_ undesirable. Our kingdoms are at the brink of war, yet _we_ , the citizens, are left in the dark. So I ask you...when the first shots are fired, who do you think you can trust?"

The screens over the stadium immediately cut to static. A wailing alarm blared through the entire facility, causing every spectator to look around in total confusion. "Alert. Grimm attack. Threat level: nine. Please seek shelter in a calm and orderly manner,"

A pop and the warping of air beside them informed Valeria and the others of a certain arrival. "A calm and orderly manner? How crude! Why, panic and madness are truly superior," tutted Ra'shamarra, who stepped through a small portal onto the arena, closely followed by J'Bari in a suit of powered ebony armour, "Speaking of madness...ooh, there is an _exquisite_ level of panic here! Even my Duke of Dementia would struggle to contain his despair in these conditions,"

A deafening caw coming from above them alerted them of the presence of a giant Nevermore. Having landed on the stadium's shield bubble, it was repeatedly pecking at the barrier in an attempt to get at the people inside. When it locked eyes with Ra'shamarra, it only redoubled its efforts to get through, peppering the shields with a vicious barrage of pecks.

"Oh, just look at you! What do you want, you pretty little birdie? A little morsel to eat?" cooed Ra'shamarra, who was seemingly oblivious to the incredulous stares of everyone else around her, "Here, have some cheese!"

She snapped her fingers and what looked like a yellow raincloud appeared high above the Nevermore. The overgrown bird-Grimm, seemingly confused as to what was casting a shadow on it. Not that it ever figured out what had happened, as it was soon bathed by a cascade of steaming hot molten cheese from the sky.

"Ha! Aren't you now the queen of cheese! Look at that golden crumbly crown, so yellow, so gooey, so delicious," Ra'shamarra cackled gleefully, dancing a happy little jig while watching the Nevermore squawk and flap its wings fruitlessly in an attempt to remove the sticky, burning-hot substance. "Well, unfortunately for you, there can be only one queen of cheese. And that is ME! Nobody else can wear a crown of cheese. Ta-ta!"

Snapping her fingers again, Team RWBY watched in shock as the sticky molten cheese burst into white-hot flames, causing the Nevermore to drop and roll on the shields while ablaze. So hot were the flames that the Nevermore was simply reduced to a pile of ashes after a few seconds.

"Wow. Uh, I...don't think I can see cheese on toast the same way, ever again," mouthed Yang.

"Yeah...me neither," added Ruby, her face slightly green as cheese-coated and well-charred feathers drifted down from above.

"Valeria-Empress. We are receiving transmissions from your ship that Atlesian air units near this position are committing friendly fire," Infinity spoke, standing up, "We are also informed that there is an overwhelming number of the creatures identified as 'Grimm' converging on the city of Vale. We suggest immediate extraction back to the ship,"

"Overwhelming numbers. How many exactly, Infinity?"

"Sensor scans indicate the presence of at least five thousand airborne units of various sizes, and an estimated hundred thousand of ground-based units that are man-sized or larger," intoned Infinity.

That comment drew horrified stares from the girls. A few dozen Grimm they could each deal with in short order. A few hundred, maybe over the course of a day. But thousands? They didn't have enough huntsmen in all of Vale to deal with that!

"Then I suppose we must return to the ship to plan our next move," Valeria said impassively, "Come, Infinity,"

"Archcat! You have to help us fight these Grimm off,"

The khajiit turned to face Yang. "Truly, do I? Under what right do you claim that?"

"You have to! I mean, there are innocents out there. We have to save them!" Weiss cried out, echoed by the rest of Team RWBY.

"They are no subjects of mine-"

 _Smack_.

Ruby's jaw dropped – as did Weiss', and literally everyone – when she saw what had just happened. J'Bari had marched forward, giving Valeria a very, _very_ hard slap on the cheek with an armoured gauntlet. For a much smaller khajiit, J'Bari's slap was something to be reckoned with. She had very nearly sent Valeria tumbling to the ground with one hit. It was only by Infinity's quick reflexes that she did not, as the Geth caught her about the shoulders before she could fall.

"This one had believed Your Majesty was more than a craven who would stand idly by as innocent civilians were under threat," J'Bari snarled, "It is comforting to know that Your Majesty would abandon those that she had stayed with for several months. Especially when they needed her most,"

"Watch your tone with me, **kiir** ," growled Valeria, letting her thu'um into her voice and shaking the entire arena.

"J'Bari has followed your orders faithfully for every day that she has been in your service. J'Bari regrets not a single day of it. But if Your Majesty will choose to abandon J'Bari's friends and their families, this one will not stand for it. What of the months that we have spent here, food and lodgings provided for us? Is the guest-right that you have been afforded utterly meaningless?" shouted back J'Bari over Valeria, causing the elder khajiit to bare her fangs in a display of dominance.

"I will not be spoken to like that, you insolent, ungrateful child!" Valeria roared, raising a hand to slap J'Bari. Only for a white snowflake glyph to appear out of nowhere, blocking the strike before it connected. Surprised, Valeria turned her head towards Weiss, who was slowly approaching her.

"Archmage Septim, stop. I think I know what my wish is," Weiss spoke, looking pointedly and J'Bari and motioning for her to step back. "I wish for you to annex Vale, effective immediately,"

"Are you crazy?!" shouted Ruby, Yang and Blake in unison. Weiss merely shrugged.

"If her objection to helping is that the people of Vale aren't her subjects, then the next best option is to make them her subjects. Then she has to help them out, as she is obligated to as the Empress of Nirn. Isn't that correct, Archmage Septim? Imperial Charter, section five, first clause?"

Grudgingly, Valeria nodded. "That would be...correct, Miss Schnee. I see that you have read more on your visit to Nirn than I had believed. But what makes you think that I would agree to such a request? The annexation of a city-state by force can hardly be seen as a good deed, even if it is for the benefit of the people as a whole,"

"The way I see it is that the Grimm have already eliminated the majority of Vale's defenses. There can be no annexation by force if the city is already entirely defenseless, as you would not need any force to annex it to begin with. Instead, you would be saving the people of Vale by preventing the Grimm from razing it to the ground. Liberating the city, instead of conquering it,"

Valeria looked thoughtfully for a moment, before she relented with a frustrated sigh and nodded. "It appears that your mind is quicker than I have given it credit for, Miss Schnee – and that I should no longer offer open-ended wagers. I may come to regret this decision in time; I would be sentencing thousands of innocent people to their deaths if I do not act, and I would be seen as a warmonger by all the other nations of this world if I do act. But my reputation can be restored over time, while the deaths of thousands cannot be remedied so easily. That, and it will become significantly harder for myself to convince Meridia to distract the other Daedric Powers if Vale were to be destroyed with all its people. Infinity, contact Admiral Servilius. He is to deploy the Sixth Legion on the city of Vale. Request for orbital support from the Third Fleet, which is currently above Nirn. They should be able to assist in short order,"

"Understood, Valeria-Empress. The command has been transmitted. Estimated time to arrival, thirty minutes,"

"Then this one will begin earlier. Team RWBY, this one believes that there is a city to defend. Let us be off!"

"Let you be off!?" shrieked Valeria, who looked rather close to bursting a vein in her temple, "No. You will remain aboard the _Wrath of Talos._ I will see to it that this is dealt with properly myself. I order you, as your Empress, to remain in the safety of my flagship!"

Not that her orders mattered any more to J'Bari, who simply turned about and vanished in a puff of purple smoke. Furious at the disobedience of her daughter, Valeria let off an animalistic shriek which shook the very ground she was standing on – and caused a few lightning bolts to strike the shields from a sky that suddenly turned dark with storm clouds. Whatever rant she was about to veer off into, however, was interrupted by Ra'shamarra tapping her on the shoulder.

"Looks like a wild independent streak runs in our family!" she cackled gleefully.

"Truly, was I so rash and hot-headed when I was young?! I should hope not,"

"I think you know the answer to that, little kitten! To try to bind Molag Bal when you were so young, so inexperienced, and expecting that the King of Rape would bow to your will? Yep! Definitely rash and hot-headed,"

"And still are, Archcat," joked Yang, "Come on, we have a city to save!"

* * *

General Ironwood was having a bad day. A really, _really_ bad day. It started out just fine, watching a few of the up-and-coming, promising huntsmen and huntresses fight it out in the Vytal Festival. Everything seemed to be under control, until that damned black queen took control of literally everything, right under his nose. He believed that bringing a large portion of the Atlesian fleet to guard the Amity Colosseum – along with a vast contingent of Atlesian Knights, Paladins and normal soldiers – would have been enough to ensure the safety of the entire event.

Now, he wasn't sure if his entire army would have been enough. The sheer number of Grimm that were pouring through Vale's defenses were immense. Vale's walls, on the end of the edge of the large valley that it was sitting in, had been breached by a vast number of Goliaths. Thousands of smaller Grimm poured into the breach from the direction of Mountain Glenn, overwhelming the sentries he'd posted up on the edges of the kingdom. And even three of his four Atlesian cruisers had been destroyed. Not by Nevermore; those ships' plating had been specifically designed to withstand even the largest Nevermore's feather barrage attacks. Sketchy reports from ground observers said that the last remaining cruiser had opened fire on the other three, and was now shooting at parts of Vale itself.

"Damn it," he growled through gritted teeth, clenching his cybernetic fist. He had gone down to Vale to assist with the evacuation of civilians, only to be met with suspicion and outright hostility by those that he met. Faunus, human, it mattered little. They took one look at him, and his attendant Atlesian troopers, and all of them would run away as fast as they could. "We're huntsmen, damn it! We're here to help!"

Not that anybody else aside from his troopers could hear him. The Valean street that he stood in was empty, littered by dead bodies and Grimm.

"Search for survivors. Send them to the safe zones!" he barked out to two of the soldiers behind him, who nodded and promptly searched the burning ruins of the buildings to his right.

"Nevermores! Take cover!" one behind him shouted, prompting all of the group to dive into the ruins of the buildings.

Without air supremacy, his troops' advance had been slowed to a crawl. They couldn't fight in the open without the blasted birds strafing them, and fighting inside buildings was an invitation for the hordes of Beowolves and Ursai to tear them to shreds. If he had some more ships, he could retake this city in an hour; but whoever had orchestrated this attack on the city had been entirely thorough about crippling his forces. The CCT tower had been knocked out within minutes of the attack starting, and he couldn't even request reinforcements from Atlas if he wanted to.

Reinforcements. He was certain that at the end of Pyrrha's deadly bout against Penny, he had seen that cat-woman Empress of Nirn on the arena floor, doing something to the android girl's body. She had a huge warship parked in orbit above Vale.

Never mind the fact that she was in Vale despite the ban on her presence in the city and the surrounding areas. He needed her forces to assist, and right at that moment. The details could wait later.

He opened up his scroll again, and quickly found the contact number for Winter Schnee. Without a CCT tower to boost signals, it was impossible to contact someone back in Atlas. But Winter was likely still in range, and her sister was quite close to the Empress from what he had seen. "Winter," he commanded, as soon as the scroll link became active, "I need you to contact your younger sister. Vale is under attack, and I need her to ask for reinforcements from that cat-empress,"

Her response was slightly delayed. "Vale is under attack?" she said, incredulously. Perhaps realising the gravity of the situation, she added, "With all due respect, should we not ask for reinforcements from Atlas first?"

"They'd take too long to get here. Our fastest transports would take ten hours to load and move, and by then Vale might as well be wiped off the map. And even if we did, the CCT system is crippled. You wouldn't be able to send a message to Mantle, let alone all the way to Atlas,"

"Understood. I shall send a message to my sister immediately," she said crisply, "Do you require all forces in the area to return? I am still only an hour or two out from Vale, and can still return quickly enough,"

"Yes. Come back, and bring the troops that are with you. We'll need everyone we can get,"

"Very well. I will return soon with reinforcements,"

The scroll link cut out, and Ironwood peeked out of the ruined building he was in. "And this is why you lose if you do not move, Ozpin," he grumbled, looking at the burning city in front of him.

* * *

Valeria had been in her element, erecting a gigantic portal in the centre of Vale's largest plaza, near the harbour. A portal that led straight to the main hangar of her dreadnought, allowing vast numbers of Imperial reinforcements to flood through. A safe zone was soon established, with the Sixth Legion setting up a perimeter of tanks and anti-aircraft guns. Three entire blocks of buildings around the portal had been levelled by Imperial combat engineers, preventing any sneak attacks by any hidden Grimm that might have avoided detection. To top it off, two dozen battlemages had erected a shield projector near the portal, providing a triple-layered shield dome that stretched for at least fifty metres out in all directions.

"Just how many men are on that ship?" Weiss gawked, watching another hundred soldiers march out through the portal, flanked by a colossal armoured vehicle with a massive twin-barrelled cannon and monstrously thick armour plating.

"The Sixth Legion numbers fifty thousand men and women, Miss Schnee. Not including armour and artillery support. And you are likely well aware that there are vast numbers of crew that attend to the ship itself," murmured Valeria, taking a dataslate from a Legion officer and reading it, "If you could stop Miss Rose from interfering with the tank crews' operations, it would be most appreciated,"

Weiss rolled her eyes and marched up to Ruby, who was pestering an incredibly patient orsimer tank commander about his tank and how it worked. The orsimer was staring at something inside his tank, with only the top of his head barely poking out of the vehicle's turret. Considering how the little red reaper was nearly shouting into the man's ear, it was a surprise that she had not been punched yet. "Come on, Ruby," she sighed, grabbing Ruby's ear and pulling hard, "Leave them to do their work. You'll have plenty of time to ask later,"

"Oww. Oww! Weiiiisss. Let go!" whined Ruby, "I haven't even managed to ask him about anything yet! He hasn't replied to any of my questions-"

The orsimer in question looked up from his tank and raised an eyebrow when he noticed Ruby. Putting two sausage-like fingers to his ear, he popped out a small black earpiece. "You whelps askin' somethin'?"

"Waiiit...you hadn't heard a single word?" Ruby asked. When the greenskinned man grunted and shook his head, her shoulders slumped in disappointment. "Aww,"

"If you ain't gonna help, then get out of the way," the man said tersely. Hearing a bit of chatter from the earpiece he was holding, he immediately popped it back into his ear. A few more grunts later, and his face cracked open into a twisted smile as he popped back into the tank and started hollering at whoever was inside. "Alright, maggots! Time to make yourselves useful. We've got an order to move with the Twelfth Company, to support their push into the northern part of this sorry city. Kill everything that's hostile,"

"That would be our signal to begin retaking the city from the Grimm," Valeria spoke, flaring up the energy scythe on the top of her staff. "Well, Miss Schnee? Those that request assistance must help themselves first. Let us see you assist with clearing this city of all hostiles. I shall remain here, to coordinate my troops. Move with the Twelfth Company and assist them in any way you are able,"

"Uh...which one's the Twelfth Company?" Ruby asked, scratching her head. Valeria mentally slapped herself upside the head; of course the huntress would not know the Legion's hierarchy or markings.

"Follow that tank. It would be much simpler than teaching you about the Legion's identification system at this point,"

"Okay, Archcat. What do you want us to do if we find survivors?"

"Send them back here. I will have my forces spread out in a circle so that the safe zone gradually becomes larger, until we take control of the entire city,"

"Legionaries! Form ranks! Shieldwall!" shouted one of the Legion commanders – a centurion, as the girls had found out, when they asked about the crest of bright crimson feathers on his helmet – and the soldiers in front immediately knelt and locked their large square shields together, with the second rank of soldiers behind them raising their own and propped their shields on top of those of the front ranks.

"Marksmen! Rifles front! Charge fire, medium intensity!"

"That also means you, pipsqueak," the tanker orsimer groused from his command cupola, poking Ruby and causing her to squeak in surprise. The little reaper had decided to simply sit on the tank as it trundled through the city streets, finding that it was easier than just walking.

"Y-yeah. Of course!" she stammered out, raising Crescent Rose and firing at the nearest beowolf. The centurion in charge of the company spared her an odd glance, but otherwise remained silent.

One by one, the beowolves dropped – but only to Ruby's shots. The soldiers with shields had formed a line which blocked the whole width of the road, with others that had rifles and what looked like enormous crossbows aiming in the gap. Their rifles – if one could call it that, considering that their barrels were simply solid rods of what looked like soul gems – began to glow red with energy, emitting faint embers from their ends.

"Steady, lads. Don't let their howls get to you. Marksmen! Hold your fire!"

Only when the beowolves came to the last ten metres to the shield wall did the centurion fire, shooting his own sidearm at the onrushing tide of Grimm.

"Now!" he roared, firing several bolts of ice at his enemies. The marksmen likewise followed, unleashing a tide of flaming lances and exploding crossbow bolts. Dozens of dead Grimm dropped to the ground, slowing down their advance; but there were still hundreds left.

"Inferno shells, four rounds, twenty metres. Block their retreat!" the tanker bellowed to the crew below him. Ruby nearly fell off the tank when the turret swivelled to one side, firing a large-calibre shell at the edge of the street. The inferno shell proved to be aptly named, liberally coating the ground with a slick of sticky blue-white flames. Three shells later, and half the street was ablaze, preventing the Grimm from retreating – or for any others to come past, as an unfortunate Ursa discovered.

The bear Grimm attempted to sprint through the flames, only to find that the blue flames consumed flesh at an alarming rate. It had scarcely taken three steps into the fire before it was reduced to a pile of scorched bone and ash, causing the other Grimm behind it to falter and stop.

"Give them nothing – but take from them everything!" roared the centurion, clipping his pistol back to his belt and drawing a razor-sharp longsword. "Push! Push forward, and feed them to the flames of Oblivion!"

It was cold and mechanical. Nothing fancy or elegant about their movements. The marksmen in the third and fourth ranks let loose an unyielding barrage over the shields of their fellows in the front ranks. Like a great wave shoving aside broken flotsam, the shieldwall marched forward, forcing back the Grimm. Their powered armour afforded them great strength; something that they used to great effect, tossing Grimm into the raging inferno like one would toss mere trash into an incinerator.

"That was stone cold," Yang huffed, folding up Ember Celica. She had hoped to get a punch or two in on the Beowolves, but with the shields of the troops being locked together like that, it was impossible to slip in even a single punch.

An unearthly shriek behind them caused Yang to look up at the sky. A shockwave of air from behind caused her to stumble forward; three Nevermores were fleeing in terror, chased by an enormous red dragon that was spewing white-hot flames at their tails. Two green dragons followed the red dragon, spraying torrents of fire and lightning at the Grimm on the ground as they passed.

"What the hell was that?"

"Ha! Looks like she's ordered the big guns in," chuckled the tanker, "If Odahviing is here, that means the rest of the dragon corps have answered her call to arms. Oi, gunner! Load up ice shells and put those damn fires out. We push forward in ten seconds!"

* * *

Elsewhere in the city, Team JNPR was having a very rough time fighting back against the Grimm. Or rather, just Ren and Nora; Pyrrha and Jaune had gone missing after the fighting had started down in Vale, having been dragged off by Ozpin on some important mission. The two were now in a residential district of Vale, following a large contingent of Atlesian Knights

"So, where's Pyrrha gone?" Nora asked Ren, crushing an Ursa's skull under her hammer.

"No idea. Ozpin wasn't very forthcoming with any information," sighed Ren, who was reloading his pistols, "We really shouldn't—wait. Get to cover!"

Ren quickly dragged a protesting Nora behind a parked car. No sooner had he done so, a pair of giant Nevermores passed overhead – squawking in agony as it flew with what looked like molten, steaming cheese coating their feathers from beak to tail.

Definitely cheese, given the smell of the stuff dripping onto the pavement as they passed.

"Cheese? Wait...there's only one person who would use cheese in a fight,"

Sure enough, Ra'shamarra's mad cackling resonated throughout the entire street. The Atlesian Knights that were with them immediately raised their guns as they detected a horde of approaching Grimm; but even their IFF systems were utterly befuddled by what their visual sensors detected. There were a group of Beowolves approaching them, that much was certain; but they were being chased by rats.

Rats the size of large horses.

And behind the rats was a very peculiar-looking cat-woman with a set of patchwork robes, playing a very disjointed and badly played song on a flute while prancing about, seemingly without a care in the world. The song seemed to be driving the giant rats berserk; one of them tore apart a Beowolf in a frenzy of teeth and claws, before it moved on to another.

"Go on and feed, my dears! Plenty of food to be had in this part of town, after all. If you could count these nasty creatures as food, that is," she cooed to the rats, which issued a chorus of disconcertingly high-pitched squeaks in approval and redoubled their efforts to catch the Grimm.

The Beowolves yelped and whined as they sprinted as fast as they could away from the insane woman and her monstrous pets. They even completely ignored the Atlesian Knights and the stunned Nora and Ren as they sped past. One of the Atlesian Knights, however, held up its hand to try and halt Ra'shamarra.

"Halt, citizen. This is an active combat zone. Please return to-o-o-"

The Atlesian Knight froze mid-speech, seizing up and standing up as stiff as a board. The others behind it did the same. Then, without warning, they jolted back to alert and lifted their weapons up, aiming at Ra'shamarra. Their visors, once green, shifted to an ominous red.

"Threat detected. Eliminating," they droned emotionlessly, firing their guns at Ra'shamarra, who simply stood there. The lasers ripped into her body, leaving smoking holes in her robes; Ren and Nora both gasped as they saw the khajiit crumple to the ground in a puddle of her own golden ichor. The giant rats around her vanished as soon as she had been shot down, leaving her completely defenseless.

"Additional threats in area. Searching,"

"Crap. Crap. Crap. I really, _really_ should have stuck with Pyrrha," Nora groaned, peeking over the bonnet of the car that they were hiding behind. If she wasn't imagining it, Ra'shamarra started to stir again despite the massive blood loss that she would have sustained.

Nope. Definitely not imagining things. Ra'shamarra stood up again with a growl, her manic grin clashing horribly with her furious voice. "Now, that's just rude!" she cried out, snapping her fingers as she picked herself up. A cascade of lead weights poured from a portal above the synthetic soldiers, crushing them beneath several tons of heavy metal. "Any more? Any more that wants some? Come get some!"

A giant Nevermore swooped down on her, thinking her to be easy prey. But she turned around at the last moment, and lashed out with a bolt of red light. The overgrown bird glowed purple for a brief moment, before it started to rapidly shrink – so much so, that by the time it reached Ra'shamarra, it barely larger than a pea. She deftly snatched the bird out of the air, pinching it between two of her fingers.

"How adorable! A sneak attack? I'm almost honoured! But...why don't you pick on something your own size? Actually, why don't I even the field a little. In Mundus, you eat food. In Oblivion, food eats YOU!"

Another puff of purple smoke later, and the shrunken Nevermore was fleeing in terror from a golem made of waffles and pancakes, smothered in honey. "BIRDIE!" the waist-high construct boomed out in a truly earth-shaking voice, its arms outstretched as it stomped after the terrified miniature Grimm.

"Okay. That's just-"

"Delicious," Nora droned dreamily, stars in her eyes.

* * *

"Honourless Atlesian scum!" snarled Valeria, barely resisting the urge to throw her dataslate to the ground in fury. She had received numerous reports in the last minute or so that the Atlesian Knights on the ground that they had encountered had suddenly turned on everyone that _wasn't_ Grimm. Civilian, legion soldier, huntsman or huntress, it mattered little. They shot everything that moved except for Grimm. Dozens of Legion soldiers had suffered injuries by supposed friendly fire before the rogue synthetics could be hacked to bits by their vengeful squadmates.

If that was the way the treacherous scum wished to play, that was fine by her. She could raze their entire pitiful city-state to the ground with a single orbital bombardment from her flagship. But for now, she had more pressing matters to attend to.

Such as the Atlesian frigate that was still in the air above Beacon. If the Atlesians were not allies of hers, then they had to be eliminated. Air supremacy was needed to purge the city of Grimm, and she could not do that while her own ships and dragons were threatened by a potential enemy.

" _Wrath of Talos,_ " she growled, "I hereby rescind the order marking Atlesian airfleet as friendly. Atlesian frigate-analogue in Valean airspace is a priority target. Terminate it with extreme prejudice,"

* * *

A/N:

And that is the first part of the Battle of Beacon. Atlas screwed up big time, and both Valeria and Ra'shamarra are now majorly pissed at the Grimm - and whoever controls them. -Valeria checks her book of Executions for Dummies-

LordMesirix: Yep, Beacon students may have taken different schools of magic, but a semblance is slightly more difficult thing to detect than straight magic. Note how Valeria's agents couldn't simply block out Emerald's semblance, because it's not a simple matter of pulling up a ward and shaking it off like a normal illusion spell. They had to overwhelm it with other illusion effects which are a direct counter to it, but are still harmful to the person being hit (calmative spells). They would also have not had enough experience with detecting subtler illusion effects, as basic illusion spells tend to be very obvious.


	34. 32 - A Septim Always Pays Her Debts

"Hmph. Didn't think that Cinder could actually find someone who could get things done," snorted Mercury, as he disembarked from a stolen shuttle with Emerald in tow.

The two had watched with glee from a rooftop as the Atlesian cruiser destroyed all the other air units, guaranteeing that the Nevermores would have free reign over the skies. After a shuttle with Atlesian reinforcements landed in Vale – and promptly got shot to pieces by their own androids – Mercury and Emerald decided to appropriate the shuttle to rendezvous with their other remaining colleague.

Which so happened to be the mute that always seemed to follow Torchwick around. The pink-and-chocolate themed girl smirked as she noticed the two boarding the last remaining Atlesian cruiser, giving them a brief wave in greeting.

"Huh. You never found Torchwick again?" asked Mercury. When Neo shook her head in response, he sneered and added, "Good riddance. Couldn't stand that idiot. All talk, no action,"

Neo puffed up indignantly, brandishing her umbrella at Mercury. The grey-haired assassin merely laughed and shrugged. "I'm only saying it like it is. Obviously, if he got captured, he's not as good as Cinder thinks that he is,"

"Enough. Neo, is it done? Have you finished what Cinder told you to do?"

Neo stuck out her tongue at Mercury, before turning to face Emerald and nodding. She held up her scroll, which displayed a black queen chess piece on a red background. "Good. Now, how about we watch what's happening down below? If everything is going right, we should be feeling _pretty bad_ about what's going on in Vale,"

"Oh, don't you know it," drawled Mercury sarcastically, "All those poor, innocent people, getting slaughtered by the Grimm. My heart _bleeds_ for them,"

Shaking in silent laughter, Neo tapped away on her scroll and changed to a hacked video feed of all security camera outside the ship.

Having expected to see complete chaos in a disorganised Vale, all three of them were stunned by what they saw.

The streets burned, as they had expected; buildings lay in ruins, and there were many civilians still fleeing from the Grimm. The Atlesian Knights were also destroyed, as they had expected. There were members of the White Fang interspersed among the Grimm and shooting at anything that moved that wasn't part of the White Fang - as they had also expected.

But what they did not expect were from other camera feeds. Specifically, from those near the centre of the town. There was an enormous gate in the shape of a giant, pulsating circle of energy in the centre of the plaza – and an enormous army that was pouring out of said gate. Complete with armoured vehicles, artillery and other pieces of war equipment that they did not expect to be brought out so quickly, or at all.

A switch to another camera feed revealed a burning street. Not that the buildings on the street were burning; but the street itself. A tank with a twin-barrelled turret was launching incendiary shells on an oncoming wave of Grimm, while dozens of soldiers with towering shields steadily pushed the Grimm that were already in front of them into the unnaturally blue flames. Flames which seemingly devoured bone and flesh with alarming rapidity, melting the Grimm into nothingness almost on contact.

"Uh...was that supposed to happen?" Emerald said, raising an eyebrow at Neo. The mute girl simply shook her head and shrugged, pointing at another camera feed. The new army was destroying any Atlesian Knights that they encountered with great prejudice, incinerating the androids as soon as they were spotted. Atlesian soldiers were stunned by thunderbolts seemingly from the fingers of some of the soldiers in robes, before being hauled roughly off to Dust knows where. "Huh. At least they're against Atlas. But I haven't seen any army with that uniform before,"

"Against Atlas, huh? If there's a big army busy fighting Atlas, that works to our advantage, right?"

An alarm blared through the Atlesian cruiser as something blasted into its hull, knocking all three of them to the floor. "Warning, impact on aft deck. Hull integrity compromised. Engineering, please report immediately," the shipboard AI called out.

"What in the Dust was that? The Atlesian cruisers are as big as any airship gets. It'd take a really hard hit for this ship to even rock!"

Something really large and powerful to even make it rock. Neo's eyes widened and she bolted out of the command bridge, leaving Emerald and Mercury behind. Soon enough, on another surveillance camera, the pair saw the pink-and-chocolate thief flying down using her parasol as a parachute. She didn't even look back, seemingly focused on trying to glide down without being eaten by a Nevermore. If they weren't dreaming, they could both swear that the thief had vanished in a puff of purple smoke – and bits of cheese.

"Wait," Emerald said, realising something that she had missed. Something terrible that she had missed. "Those soldiers. They were shooting at Atlesian troops..."

"...And we're in an Atlesian cruiser," Mercury finished, his eyes widening in horror.

* * *

" _Wrath of Talos,_ you are clear to fire. Zero-point-zero-five percent strength on primary cannon," Valeria spoke into her dataslate, watching the hijacked Atlesian cruiser with murderous intent. Sure enough, three narrow beams of light – the tracking and targeting lasers – converged onto the top of the Atlesian cruiser. And then, with a blinding flash and a thunderous roar, a beam of superheated plasma shot down from orbit and pierced straight through the centre of the ship, blasting the ship into twisted metal shards.

"Target destruction confirmed. Stand by for further orders," Valeria spoke calmly, ignoring the horrified cries from the rescued Valean citizens present in the central plaza. A message arrived on her dataslate with a beep, and she tapped it open.

"Hm. How interesting," she murmured, "The Valean Council has been discovered dead in the town hall? How...unfortunate. Infinity, are you capable of broadcasting signals to all local electronics?"

"Affirmative, Valeria-Empress. This platform is equipped with wide-spectrum communications equipment,"

"Very well. I want you to broadcast a message to all devices within Vale. For scrolls and other personal electronics, I want you to hijack them. I wish for everyone to hear my speech,"

The synthetic tilted its head for a moment, and then nodded. "Task received, and completed in three-point-five-five seconds. Hostile worm in many personal devices discovered and eradicated,"

"A hostile worm?"

"Affirmative, Valeria-Empress. A self-replicating program, which attempted to forcibly gain access to the Geth network. We have overwhelmed it and purged it from all electronic devices in the area,"

"Excellent work. Should you discover any further threats, I assume that you will do your utmost to remove them. Now, then, to my broadcast,"

She turned to her own dataslate and cleared her throat. "Attention, citizens of Vale! I, Valeria Septim, the first of her name, Empress of the Nirnian Empire, do hereby this city annexed under the auspices of the Nirnian Empire, and placed under martial law. With the destruction of the treacherous Atlesian air fleet and the betrayal of their synthetic soldiers, I have had no choice but to order my own soldiers to eliminate every last Atlesian soldier in Vale. A regrettable decision, but one that is necessary to preserve order in this time of chaos,"

Shocked murmurs echoed through the plaza. "You can't do that!" cried out one of the citizens, followed by muttered agreements from others in the area.

"Right at this very moment, the Sixth Legion of the Empire is scouring the city and eliminating every and all Grimm encountered. I am informed that the Council of Vale has been destroyed by the Grimm, leaving the city without a proper government. For the time being, your safety is of the utmost importance. Should you encounter Grimm, remain calm and stay hidden. Once you have encountered my troops, surrender yourselves immediately to them and you will be escorted to a safe zone inside the city centre. Those that resist risk grievous bodily harm, up to and including death. You have been warned,"

She took another deep breath, convincing herself that the annexation was necessary. "Once this siege has lifted and the city has been liberated of the Grimm threat, citizens that wish to depart for other cities in Remnant may do so without hindrance. For those that wish to remain behind, and those that are unconvinced of the benefits of joining my empire, I shall share with you my vision. A vision of a Remnant united, free of Grimm and bound by brotherhood, unfettered by shackles of fear and prejudice. A vision of a Remnant without war, where all are free to pursue their wishes in peace,"

"I will admit, that at the moment that I had arrived on Remnant, my perception of the world was dim. A world that was overrun by dark creatures. A world that was plagued by discrimination against the faunus. A world where life barely clung on, eking out a meagre existence in tiny patches of land that were deemed safe. A world that was barely worth saving, fit only for purging and terraformation, and then colonisation,"

A few angry cries of dissent resounded in the plaza. Ignoring them, Valeria continued. "However, those views were those of the past. My encounters with the huntsmen and huntresses-in-training of Beacon Academy had proven to me that perhaps there was something more than meets the eye. These young men and women train to rid the world of the Grimm threat as best as they are able, even with the limited numbers that they possess. Bravery beyond bravery, in a thankless, endless task that seems at first impossible. Yet they persevere, and even prevail. Their spirit is indomitable, and their strength admirable. They have proven that despite the darkness that pervades this planet, there is a spark of redemption that exists within it. Within its people, waiting to be awakened,"

"I have seen a Schnee support a faunus as a trusted battle-companion, helping to fight back against the darkness that threatens this world. I have witnessed faunus staunchly defend their human comrades against all threats, despite their ill-treatment at the hands of humans. I have seen misguided faunus murder both humans and faunus, in an attempt to advance their twisted goals. I have seen what can be done when one puts their minds to it, and what misfortune may happen when one does not. Cast aside your hatred, your fear, your preconceptions. Embrace a brighter tomorrow, as one people, one nation, united under a single banner. Together, we shall be able to achieve this, and build a future worthy of your descendants until the end of time!"

* * *

Ironwood grimaced as he heard his scroll blare out that broadcast from the khajiit empress in the square. The Atlesian troopers with him glanced at each other, uncertain of what they were to do. With the last Atlesian cruiser destroyed by what Ironwood believed was an orbital strike from Valeria's flagship, Atlas had no power to challenge the Empress' declaration of Vale's annexation. Even if Winter had managed to send out a distress signal to Atlas somehow, had the CCT systems not been disabled, their forces would have taken a full eight hours to arrive. Enough time for these Imperials to purge the Grimm from the city and entrench themselves.

Not to mention their numbers, and the sheer size of the Empire on the other side of that portal. From what public information that Jacques Schnee had gathered from his youngest daughter, the Empire spans entire worlds. Worlds, and not just cities scattered over worlds. Logistically, it was impossible for Atlas to contest the occupation of Vale, even if they wanted to. It would bleed the Atlesian economy dry, for little gain and much loss.

The telltale rumble of one of the Imperial armoured vehicles moving down the street was quickly approaching them. Scattered Beowolves, set ablaze by their incendiary weapons, yelped and whined as they ran back to where they came from.

No. This was not an enemy they could fight. Not today, and definitely not with so few men under his command. This day was theirs.

"Stand down, men," he sighed, holstering his revolver. Uncertainly, his soldiers all lowered their rifles. The Nirnian tank slowly crawled into view, its escorting infantrymen scanning the ruined buildings around them with balls of floating light. Slowly, Ironwood approached, holding up both his hands in a universal gesture of surrender.

* * *

Cinder was absolutely livid. This was not how it was supposed to go. Many of the White Fang forces around the city were surrendering when they were found. Those that were ferrying in Grimm with their bullheads were shot down by anti-aircraft weaponry, and those that continued to resist were killed in short order by a merciless enemy. Even those that surrendered after resisting had been summarily executed.

And especially after the wide spectrum broadcast from that damned cat, even more of the White Fang were surrendering without a fight. She even heard reports from scattered communication channels that Adam had been killed. That rumour alone had caused large amounts of panic in her own forces. "Useless animals," she growled under her breath, shutting down her scroll and ignoring the rest of the reports coming in.

She looked at Beacon Academy. Initially, her plan had been to sow enormous amounts of chaos in Vale in order to bring about a collapse of the kingdom. Seeing as that objective seemed almost impossible with the arrival of an unrelated third party, she focused on the other important objective in her mind.

The acquisition of the other half of the Fall Maiden's powers. The half of the soul that she possessed called out for its missing half, revealing its location deep within Beacon Academy's bowels. While the distraction was still present in Vale, at the very least she could complete this objective.

Or perhaps she needed a little more of a distraction. The earth shook and trembled as an ancient terror awoke from beneath a mountain in Mountain Glenn.

The Grimm Dragon had awoken, roused from its slumber by the mass chaos in Vale.

"Hrm. So it seems that I must contend with a vile abomination of the Grimm," growled Valeria, clenching her fist around her staff, "A lowly Grimm in the shape of a noble _dov_! How vexing to observe, and infinitely insulting if it is allowed to exist. Infinity, I entrust to you the care of these people. Ensure that they remain safe,"

"Understood, Valeria-Empress. We will do so to the best of our abilities,"

Valeria observed the flight of the Grimm dragon. It was heading towards Beacon Academy, ignoring everything else around it. Several of her dragons had attacked it, but they may as well have been hatchlings attempting to pester an ancient drake. Not a single one managed to so much as char the dragon's hide, let alone wound it. " _Wrath of Talos_ , I request tracking on an overgrown Grimm dragon on a direct flight path to Beacon Academy. Hold fire, but be ready to fire on my command. Instruct dragon corps to return back to Vale,"

Whipping around, she teleported herself to the base of Beacon Academy's tower.

"Uh...Archmage Septim? What are you doing here?"

"I should ask you the same question, Miss Nikos. The city of Vale is burning, and yet you...and Mr. Arc...are both at Beacon Academy. What is the meaning of this?"

Jaune sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. "I was kinda worried about her, so I thought I might go with her. You know, to see if she needed any help,"

"Miss Nikos is a very capable combatant, Mr. Arc. But it would do no harm to assist her, regardless. A noble companion you have here, Miss Nikos. See to it that his loyalty towards you is...thoroughly rewarded,"

Pyrrha blushed furiously, as did Jaune. "I—no, we're not like that. I-I mean, it's not like that," she stammered out.

"Or is it? Your reactions say otherwise. A word of advice, _kiir_. One who tries may fail, but one who never tries will never succeed. Now, this is hardly the time or place to be conversing so casually. There is a Grimm Dragon on the way to this very location. One that is almost as large as an Atlesian cruiser. Unless you have a reason to be present, I would suggest that you flee to a safe location,"

Pyrrha visibly paled. "Oh, no! That means that we have little time left,"

"Little time? What are you planning, Miss Nikos?"

"Maybe it's better to show you, Valeria," Ozpin spoke, coming towards them from inside the tower. The man's eyes spoke of great distaste; evidently, he had not taken the annexation of Vale kindly.

Valeria narrowed her eyes at the man, but understood that now was not the time to be questioning anything. Who knew when the Dragon Grimm would arrive?

Down the elevator they went, to a floor that she never knew even existed. Beacon Academy's central tower was so large, Valeria never even bothered to check what was on the floors other than those that she was required to visit from time to time. Looking at her students, however, she noticed that Pyrrha was rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet. Something that the calm and collected Pyrrha never did; and something that made Valeria even more suspicious as to what exactly did she know that made her so nervous.

When the elevator finally reached the room that was far beneath the academy, Valeria sensed a soul in the room. A fractured one. And one that was exceptionally powerful, even for a soul of Remnant that was already more potent than others in her empire. She snarled as she marched towards the pair of pods at the end of the room that was radiating the soul energy that she detected. On reaching the pods, however, she ran her fingers through the fur on top of her head and yowled in frustration.

"Ozpin," she snarled, an energy scythe erupting from the top of her staff, "Explain yourself. Experiments upon a soul are an abomination. An affront to the gods and all laws of nature. And an offense that is particularly repugnant to one of my allies, who would surely demand retribution for even thinking of this. Why is there a fractured soul in this...this girl?"

Ozpin chose his words carefully. "Do you believe in legends, Valeria?"

"Every legend contains a grain of truth hidden behind fanciful words. Continue,"

And thus Ozpin retold the story of the four seasonal maidens to Valeria. The Empress merely stood there, listening to every word without a comment. Finally, when Ozpin finished his tale, she shook her head and growled in disapproval.

"Enough. The protection of these maidens, while a noble goal, is misguided. Simply trying to erase them from written history does not make them invisible. Nor does it protect them from those who are sufficiently determined to discover their existence – or those remember their existence in the first place,"

Ozpin blanched. "Remember their existence...?" he mouthed.

Valeria gave a short, mirthless laugh. "When one is cursed with the burden of immortality, one tends to remember things differently from mortals. I, and my soon-to-be wife, are functionally immortal. We recall things that have not been written, and we remember the old legends. Who is to say that there are no such beings in Remnant? After all, I have serious doubts that every part of the planet has been explored, given the prevalence of Grimm,"

She leaned in and narrowed her eyes dangerously, peering into Ozpin's eyes. "I will say this once, Ozpin. There is only one truly permanent solution to a problem. Death. Unless you exterminate the problem once and for all, the threat will still exist, even if you were to hide the motivation for it existing in the first place. Now, enough of this. Why have you specifically asked for Miss Nikos to come with you?"

Pausing briefly, she looked at the pods. One was empty, and one evidently had a dying maiden inside. A hose connected the two, with some complex machinery in between them. Piecing the evidence together, she abruptly smashed the empty pod with her energy scythe.

"I know what you seek, Ozpin, and I will not allow it. A body was never meant to live with the energies of two souls bound within a single form, and a half-soul will tear apart the whole, given time," snarled Valeria menacingly, "Miss Nikos still has a life ahead of her, and you would consign her to such an ignoble end? Are you even aware of how the soul functions, and how it behaves in a body? How the animus strains against a corpus it was not made for, and how it will tear the corpus to pieces in time?"

"I'm afraid...that I can't answer that," admitted Ozpin, "The soul is sacred to the people of Remnant, and this Atlesian technology is experimental at best. We do not know if it will even work yet,"

Groaning in frustration, Valeria rummaged in one of her robe's inner pockets. How these people decided to tamper with something so volatile without truly understanding what they were doing was beyond her. She pulled out a handful of small, pearlescent crystals, all of them white – and one much larger one, of midnight black, gleaming like a starry night sky.

"What is that...?" Pyrrha asked, noting how closely it resembled the white crystals. Yet the white soul gems, as she knew they were called, looked completely innocuous. The black one, on the other hand, radiated pure malice, as though they threatened to suck her in.

"Black soul gems," Valeria said darkly, "Soul gems capable of capturing the souls of a sapient creature. Highly restricted in my empire, and I hope that by the Nine you will never see them in use on a battlefield,"

"What do you plan to do?" questioned Ozpin warily. Those crystals sounded extremely dangerous – especially for those with activated Auras, considering that the Aura was literally the outward projection of one's soul.

Valeria muttered a few words under her breath, and a soft purple glow emanated around the comatose maiden. "I will capture the Fall Maiden's soul in this gem. She will die, but it will be a mercy compared to living with a fractured soul,"

"And then...?"

"Why, I will have to seek the other half and reunite it. A fractured soul seeks its other half, as a soul must remain complete in the laws of the gods and nature," Valeria spoke. "Simply bringing the partially filled soul gem near the bearer of the other half of the soul will tear it out of them. With an...exorbitant amount of pain, of course, but it would be more painful for the seeker to have to scour the entire world for the missing half. But stand aside-"

The whistling of an arrow caught her hearing, and she deftly stepped aside. The arrow – made of a familiar black glass, she noted – pierced the pod's cover cleanly, embedding itself in the Fall Maiden's chest. The comatose maiden gasped once before expiring, her eyes glazing over in death. But instead of racing to the other half of her soul on dying, her soul found itself being compelled to enter the black soul gem held in Valeria's hand.

"Thank you, vile assassin, for completing that which I was about to do myself," Valeria spoke loudly, turning around.

There, holding a bow of black glass, was a stunned woman. One wearing a dress seemingly infused with Fire Dust, if the faint orange glow of the red material was any indication. Shaking herself out of her shock, she fell back towards the elevator – only for the elevator doors to be sealed by a wall of blue flames. She flared her Aura in an attempt to walk through the flames, only to cry in shock when the fingers that had touched the flames were severely burnt. Her Aura had not even protected her in the slightest.

"You will not escape this time. No shadows will hide you, no corner will shelter you. Face your doom with dignity, you craven scum," declared Valeria, advancing on her. Pyrrha and Jaune drew their weapons, intending to help; but Valeria stuck her staff out to the side, stopping the two from advancing any further. "No. You will remain out of this matter. This is personal,"

Valeria continued to advance calmly towards the assassin. With every step she took, she left a wide trail of frost and ice on the floor; a wave of her hand saw glacial walls shoot from the floor to ceiling between the pillars of the underground vault, turning the enormous hall into a single, ice-bound corridor.

"Nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide," snarled Valeria, flaring up the blade on her energy scythe. A single sweep of it sent a blade of emerald green flames down the corridor. The assassin, evidently not content to simply give up, somersaulted over the flaming blade, which carved a deep gash into the stonework behind her. Twisting around, the woman conjured a set of three glass arrows, firing them in quick succession at the advancing empress, enhanced by the fire of the Fall Maiden.

" **FUS RO DAH!** "

A shockwave erupted from the empress' mouth, causing the entire chamber to tremble. The arrows in flight crumbled to dust on contact with the shockwave, scattering glowing embers into the air. The woman was launched at bone-shattering speeds against the wall behind her, colliding with a sickening crunch and sending spiderweb cracks running through the stone wall. Groaning, in pain, she fell forward, barely catching herself from falling flat on the floor.

"Get up," growled Valeria, flinging an ice shard at the prone assassin. Perhaps seeing the blue ice reflected on the polished floor, she just barely dodged it by rolling to one side, watching in horror as the icy spear shattered where her head was but a few seconds ago. Another three ice missiles and a fireball were already on the air by the time she looked up again; she barely shot these down with arrows of her own and countering with a fifth arrow aimed at the cat's face.

Or what she thought was the cat's face. The arrow merely passed straight through her and embedded itself on the wall on the far side of the vault. She noticed, however, that there was a very faint distortion in the empty space to the side, and narrowed her eyes. Before she could nock another arrow, a thunderbolt struck her and sent her to her knees in pain.

"GET UP!" Valeria roared, her illusory form in the middle of the hall fading away, and the distorted patch of air to one side darkened and revealed her true location. When the crumpled assassin on the ground simply lay there, hacking her lungs out, the khajiit raised a hand and clenched it, slowly lifting her telekinetically by the throat.

"Valeria, that's enough! She's in no condition to fight!" barked Ozpin out, disturbed by the sight that he was seeing. He had known that Valeria was prone to fits of rage; but to see her engage in a cold, sadistic manner of combat was unnerving. And judging by the greenish faces of both Pyrrha and Jaune, he was not the only one that was disturbed.

"Where was that mercy when this vile woman was intent on murdering my only daughter in cold blood? Where was that mercy when this pile of filth decided to slaughter thousands of innocent civilians and reduce many more to homelessness?" Valeria spat, clenching her fist tighter. The woman had by now dropped her bow and started to scrabble helplessly at her throat, trying feebly to resist the invisible force that was crushing her windpipe, "Those that show no mercy should expect the same. For the crime of attempted regicide against my daughter; for the crime of high treason against the Kingdom of Vale, while it existed, by conspiring to destroy its defenses; for the crime of murder against an innocent maiden for the sole purpose of acquiring a power that was never hers to wield; the punishment is **DEATH**!"

Consumed by blind rage, Valeria raised her staff. A pulse of magicka shot out from its tip, forming a wall of thousands of icy spears which floated in front of her. Another pulse, and the wall of icy projectiles shot forward, converging on the woman. Or rather, her legs. With a final cry of anguish, the woman fell to the ground, unconscious. Her legs had been severed cleanly at the knees; there was little blood thanks to the way that the gaping wound had been frozen solid on contact with the ice.

"Well," Jaune said awkwardly, "I...guess that really shows the...intent part of Destruction magic,"

"Y...yeah," Pyrrha agreed, "I really didn't need to see that,"

"And I had hoped that neither of you would have needed to see anything like that," sighed Ozpin, "Valeria. Please. Stop. This woman is in no condition to fight. Bring her for trial in Vale. Don't do this,"

His only reply was a venomous glare from the khajiit archmage. "You are correct about one thing," replied Valeria, "She is in no condition to fight. That does not make her any less of a threat once she has recovered, however. Her crimes are grave, and the evidence is damning. She will not be afforded a trial. Those that wish to play the game of power should know the rules well. You will either win, or you will die,"

Advancing on the unconscious woman, Valeria produced the black soul gem that she had held earlier. Holding it so that the dagger-like point on the lower half of the soul gem was pointing downwards, she plunged it into the woman's stomach. A thunder-like crack echoed through the hall, and all of them witnessed strands of purplish-white light streaking from the woman's body into the crystal.

"Is that...?"

Valeria nodded. "The soul of the Fall Maiden is whole once more, and is contained in this crystal. If I should shatter it, the soul would be free – and it would simply latch on to this cowardly woman here. That leaves only one solution to allow the true Fall Maiden's soul to rest in peace,"

A dull roar sounded from somewhere above them, and the walls seemed to tremble and shake.

"What was that?" Pyrrha whispered, looking up toward the source of the noise.

"That," Valeria said grimly, "Would be the largest Grimm that I have seen thus far. A Dragon Grimm had emerged from the direction of Mountain Glenn, according to my flagship's scanners, heading towards Beacon Academy. That tremor would indicate that it has finally arrived. As the Dragonborn, it is my duty to bring all of Akatosh's children to heel – or destroy them, if they will refuse to obey,"

"...You're thinking of fighting one of the most ancient of Grimm?" Ozpin said quietly, "That is suicide, Valeria. Not without the powers of the silver-eyed warriors could we bring down a Grimm that is so ancient and powerful,"

"Miss Rose is quite talented, I will agree. But even her abilities are not sufficient for this battle. I would suggest that you find and escort any survivors still present in Beacon Academy to the safe zone in Vale,"

"Wait, you're serious. You're taking that thing, alone?" Jaune gasped in shock.

Valeria rolled her eyes and shook her head. "I never mentioned that _I_ would be fighting it, Mr. Arc. There are other uses for my dreadnought, after all. Such as killing overgrown lizards, birds and other such pests,"

Pyrrha looked uncertainly at Jaune. "Did she just...tell a joke?"

"I...think she did?"

* * *

The Grimm Dragon had a strange feeling.

It felt like it was being watched.

Felt like it was being watched _very_ closely.

It looked around. It couldn't see any pesky humans.

Or any pesky faunus.

It broke down the weird dome on top of the weird tower that its mistress had instructed it to go to.

There was supposed to be someone coming there. Someone friendly.

Minutes passed.

It was bored.

Very bored.

But it now saw a narrow beam of light coming from above.

It batted at the beam of light. It didn't burn.

There were two others. They also didn't burn.

Totally harmless and not worth its time.

* * *

A/N:

City of Vale: 0 hitpoints.

Valeria moves Modern Nirnian Legion into Vale.

City of Vale captured! Would you like to Annex, Puppet or Raze this city? [ANNEX] PUPPET RAZE

City of Vale annexed. Warmonger penalty: Egregious.

Atlas to Nirnian Empire: Fears that the Nirnian Empire's warmongering would plunge the world into a new Dark Age!

Krazyfanfiction: I don't think she would give a skeever's arse about whether or not Atlesian forces had been hijacked :P They weren't on particularly good terms to begin with.


	35. 33 - Epilogue: End of the Beginning

"Professor Ozpin. For the last time, I am not relinquishing control of Vale to the Vale Council," sighed Valeria. For what seemed to be the umpteenth time that week, the headmaster of Beacon Academy had petitioned her to restore Vale to what he called its 'rightful leaders'.

Not that he had any authority any more, in any case. The planetary bombardment ordered on the Grimm dragon had all but annihilated Beacon Academy. Only the initial rune circle used to anchor the transplanar portal and the amphitheatre beside it had survived; partly due to the thick shielding around both structures, and partly due to the distance. The rest of the Academy had been reduced to a smoking crater nearly half a mile wide, much to Ozpin's chagrin.

With the arrival of the Nirnian Third Fleet, which had parked itself above Vale, the rest of the Grimm had been obliterated in twelve hours of fierce fighting. The Sixth Legion, finding itself relieved of combat duties by the naval forces in the air, began to put out the fires that raged in the city itself. By daybreak, every fire in the city centre was extinguished, though the structures in the outlying districts of the city required demolition, thanks to excessive damage. New fortifications had been erected where the old had been damaged or destroyed, bringing the city's defenses back up to a formidable level.

Huntsmen and huntresses, both in-training and active, also assisted in the search and rescue effort that followed. Some chafed under the strict chain of command that was exercised by the Legion; but most would tolerate it in order to assist many more people than they otherwise could on their own. Thousands of civilians, buried under collapsed structures, had been rescued by their combined efforts. While they would not acknowledge it, some of the commanding officers in the Legion found the free-spirited approach of the huntresses and huntsmen somewhat...refreshing. It was certainly different for those that were duty- and honour-bound to obey orders, to discover an order of warriors whose sole calling was to assist from the kindness of their hearts.

"The battle for Vale is won, and there exists no Grimm threat in the immediate area. Order has been restored. Don't you think that it's time to return control to those that held it?"

Valeria bit back a growl. "Order has been restored, but it has not been kept, Professor Ozpin. Until the Grimm have been wiped off the planet to the last, smallest Nevermore, the Grimm threat still exists. Relinquishing control to those too complacent to defend themselves properly will only result in another potential tragedy,"

"We have the huntsmen and huntresses to eliminate the Grimm that wander too close to our borders," argued Ozpin.

"A task that would have been made infinitely easier, had your people maintained a respectable military and deployed it to clear the wilderness," Valeria sighed again, tapping on a dataslate and sliding it to the headmaster sitting across her desk. "Observe,"

On the dataslate, he raised an eyebrow as he watched Weiss Schnee and Ruby Rose traversing what looked like the Emerald Forest. Weiss was carrying a stack of curious white-and-silver disks with a bluish-green glowing crystal in each one, while Ruby was hunched over with a crate on her back that he assumed was filled with the same things. In front of them, a squad of battlemages scoured the forest underbrush for any Grimm, eliminating even the smallest one with great prejudice.

But what he saw next made his jaw drop. Weiss pressed the crystal on a disk, before letting it fall to the ground. A conjured flaming creature in the likeness of a woman – a flame atronach, if he recalled correctly – emerged from the disk. Even as the group advanced, the atronach remained hovering above the disk.

"When you eliminate Grimm from a territory, it is in one's best interests that it remains clear of Grimm," Valeria explained, "These disks contain a conjured Atronach, which will stand guard where they are summoned. Day and night, without sleeping or resting. They will ensure that what ground we take back from the Grimm, we will be able to claim it for ourselves without fear of being overrun,"

"This is something that we did not have before,"

"Indeed, you did not. However, you still had the entire population of the city. How many of them volunteered to become huntsmen and huntresses, while the others would rather cower in their homes as they are attacked? There is a reason why every man and woman that is of age in my empire must spend at least two weeks in a year training under the Legion's banner, Professor Ozpin. It ensures that should they be attacked, they will not be defenseless; and that they may join their brothers and sisters in arms at a moment's notice,"

A brief pause ensued as Ozpin choked on his coffee. "Are you mad?" he coughed out, clearing his throat, "Putting helpless men and women in great danger? The Grimm are too dangerous to take on without constant training!"

"A little training is still better than none. I am certain that you, yourself, have noticed that the Grimm do not hesitate to attack people, whether they are armed or unarmed, a combatant or a non-combatant. If a citizen was to die during a fight, dying while eliminating several other enemies would be preferable to simply hiding and waiting to be slaughtered,"

The matter-of-fact way that Valeria had delivered her thoughts on the matter had caused a bit of anger to flash across Ozpin's eyes. "So, you see the citizens as nothing more than cannon fodder?"

"On the contrary, Professor Ozpin, I see them as people worth defending. But those that wish for help must be able to help themselves first, in order to buy some time. There is an apt saying among the humans of another nation of my plane of existence; it is that those that wish for peace, must prepare for war. Is there something more that you wish to ask?"

The two black-robed and hooded mages on either side of Valeria moved forward, as if to escort the former headmaster out of the newly repaired town hall. But Valeria herself held up her hand, and gazed into Ozpin's eyes, as though daring him to ask another tedious question that had been answered hundreds of times before.

"Just one," he said curtly. "Did you plan for this all along? When you first came here?"

"Truthfully, no. I had no intentions of even bringing in my legions to defend this city. However, Miss Schnee invoked a debt of honour that I owed her, and I was honour-bound to comply,"

"And what did she ask for, exactly?"

"Why, the annexation of Vale itself, in order to protect the lives of its citizens,"

* * *

High above Remnant – or was it even above, considering that the _Wrath of Talos_ was well out of Remnant's orbit? - the Empress' dreadnought was drifting along lazily in space. The lesser frigates and cruisers of the Imperial Navy had been assigned the dull task of providing fire support to the Legion soldiers on the ground, and thus the dreadnought was issued the task of surveying the local system for any resources that might be of use for the Empire, and breaking open asteroids if any valuable minerals were found locked inside.

That, of course, was only one of the objectives that had been issued. In one of the hangars, J'Bari was having a field day with a particular assassin that had been captured, now bound by ethereal chains to a metal crate. It seemed that Valeria's vindictive streak was something that had been passed on to her daughter; a fact that the crew had discovered after the younger khajiit had been given the privilege of administering Cinder Fall's punishment.

A punishment that J'Bari had been administering with rather disturbingly great pleasure, on her part.

"Six hundred and sixty five," she chuckled darkly, lashing at Cinder's naked back with an icy whip. The assassin barely flinched when the barbed ice spikes on the whip's end raked across her skin, all feeling had been reduced to numbness after the first two hundred or so lashes. "Six hundred and sixty-six, and this one is done with this portion of the punishment. Healer, please make sure that she yet lives. The final part of the punishment is yet to come,"

The healer, a priest of Kynareth, looked torn between helping the bleeding and dazed prisoner and simply putting her out of her misery. In the end, his fear of being whipped for insubordination won out, and he hurriedly rushed over to check on Cinder. "She...she still lives, Inquisitor,"

"Very good. You may take your leave, now,"

Those words could not have sounded any sweeter to the priest. He bowed and left, eager to take no more part in the torture of a prisoner.

"Excellent. Now, where was this one up to?" purred J'Bari, advancing on Cinder.

The woman was almost unrecognisable; her hair had been shaven off, and her Dust-infused clothes had been stripped away to rid her of any weapons that she could use. She had been issued a set of rough prisoners' rags to wear; rags that could barely stop the constant chill of the dreadnought's interior. Even now, she moaned in pain, half unaware of what was going on any more.

"Ah, yes. The execution itself. Her Majesty has informed this one that Cinder sought power. Power beyond her own understanding. Her Majesty, in her infinite wisdom, has decided to grant Cinder a chance to approach the greatest power in this star system,"

Smiling viciously, J'Bari walked over to the side of the hangar. There was a row of four escape pods there, each one large enough to fit exactly one person.

"Fire is power. And when one plays with a fire too large to handle, one is likely to be burnt. And what larger fire is there, than the blazing heart of a star system?" continued the khajiit, slamming her fist onto the door release button of one. The door immediately slid open, and J'Bari turned about. Snapping her fingers, an ice atronach burst to life behind Cinder; an unspoken command later, and the bound assassin was sent sliding across the room on an icy slick, straight into the open escape pod. "This one grants your wish to find the greatest power in the star system. And this is the vehicle that will take you straight to it,"

"No- this is madness! You can't do this!" Cinder whimpered incoherently, only vaguely having an idea about what the khajiit was about to do.

If it were even possible for someone already grinning from ear to ear, J'Bari's predatory grin grew even wider. "Madness? That is the realm of this one's grandmother. This? This is the Nirnian Empire!"

She punched the launch button on the escape pod controls, and watched with glee as the blast doors in front of her slammed shut. With a dull roar, the thrusters on the escape pod ignited, and the pod shot out into space. The pod was soon just a black speck against the bright yellow-white of the distant star, drawn inexorably to its blazing surface.

"Inform Her Majesty that the sentence has been carried out to this one's satisfaction," J'Bari spoke crisply into her dataslate. Her would-be assassin had been executed by her hands; Vale and her friends were safe and everything seemed to be returning to normal. Nothing could possibly ruin her day.

"Understood, Dominatrix-"

J'Bari blinked. "...What did you just call this one, Admiral Servilius?" she murmured incredulously.

"Domin- I mean, Inquisitor J'Bari,"

J'Bari groaned. She took it back. Her day had just been ruined.

* * *

Down in Vale, Weiss was having a shoutout session with her father – as had happened every day since the Battle of Beacon. Thanks to the 'hostile takeover' of Vale, the Council of Atlas had decided to boycott the Empire – and that naturally resulted in a terrible, terrible state of the Schnee Dust Company losing hundreds of millions of lien overnight, due to their Dust quarry expansions no longer being necessary. Her father had been beyond livid; he had believed that having Weiss as someone that was close to the Empress would have brought him great dividends in the way of favourable trades and guarantees, but instead he had heard about how she was directly the cause of all his troubles. Fighting back against the Grimm invasion was one thing, but to encourage the annexation of an entire kingdom?

"I do not care about your childish reasons. The people of Vale were not in immediate danger. They had huntsmen and huntresses to protect them, and our great army and air fleet! What possessed you to ask for something as unreasonable as that? You could have asked for a better deal for the Schnee family, and we could have both walked away from this richer! You are returning to Atlas with me, young lady, and you will _not_ have a say in this!"

Disgusted by the lack of concern for what happened to the people of Vale, Weiss finally snatched her hand free of her father's grip. Ruby had been right after all; taking care of other people felt better than having tremendous amounts of ill-gotten wealth. It was one thing to witness her father ignore the plight of numerous faunus, as that could be justified by the constant attacks of the White Fang on her family. It was another to witness her father simply ignore the plight of _humans_ , simply because rescuing them would offer little to no financial benefits in return.

"I'm not going back to Atlas," she said firmly, meeting his glare with one of her own. "And I'm certainly not returning with you,"

Jacques' face turned purple with rage. He raised a hand to strike Weiss' cheek; and to his surprise, Weiss did not make a single movement. She took the blow, and staggered to one side, an angry red palmprint on her pale cheek. Instantly, the Schnee patriarch found the cold edge of a blade at his throat from his left, and the searing heat of a greenish-glowing energy blade from his right.

"Strike my apprentice one more time, and I will personally ensure that there is not enough of you left to bury in a shoebox, Jacques Schnee. You are treading on thin ice," growled Valeria from his right. She flared her scythe blade one more time as a warning, forcing him to take a few steps back.

"Yeah- I mean, um, that wasn't very nice, what you did to Weissy!" echoed the shrill voice of a red-cloaked girl to his left.

His daughter's partner. Ruby Rose, he vaguely recalled. And if rumours were correct, a different sort of 'partner' for his daughter.

"What I do to discipline my wayward child is none of your business, Miss Septim. And it is certainly none of yours...Miss Rose. Now, you will come along quietly, Weiss, or we will have a rather terrible disagreement once we arrive home,"

"You may wish to update your records. The last I have checked, young Miss Septim is not your dependent any longer. She is her own woman, of sound mind and body, and legally a citizen of the Empire as of three days ago,"

Jacques gave a small, nervous laugh. "Excuse me? Did you just call my daughter _young Miss Septim_?"

"I do believe that your hearing is still functional, Mr. Schnee. I should not need to repeat myself," sighed Valeria, casting a dirty look at a grinning Yang. The blonde even had the nerve to return a double thumbs-up, causing the ancient archmage to give her a withering glare. "Now, before I do something rash that we would both regret, I would suggest that you remove yourself from Vale. I have had one attempted regicide upon a daughter of mine, and I would prefer not to have to deal with a second regicide attempt within a month,"

A squad of heavily-armoured troops stepped up behind Valeria when the khajiit motioned for them to come forward, and at that point Jacques Schnee knew that he had overstayed his welcome. To his surprise, however, Valeria handed a single large datapad to him as he left.

"Though our business dealings may be at an end, Mr. Schnee, I have not forgotten that your company has delivered the Dust as agreed. On this datapad, you may find a cheque for the sum of lien that I owe you. Let it be known that a Septim always pays her debts," Valeria spoke, giving the man a warning glare, "Either financially, or through fire and blood. And for both our sakes, let us hope that the latter never comes to fruition,"

Jacques nodded stiffly, gritting his teeth. That was as thinly-veiled as a threat could ever be. "I should hope so," he replied, inwardly plotting how he would get back at this arrogant cat that dared to think she was above the Schnees, "I...will return to Atlas,"

"That would be best,"

A few minutes later, Jacques had been ushered into a transport ship and ordered to leave Valean airspace. As his airship departed, Weiss let out a sigh of relief that she never knew she had been holding back. "I'm so glad that he's finally off my back. No more having to do things because _he_ wants me to,"

"So proud of you, Weiss! You're finally doing things for yourself!" Ruby cried out, practically tackling Weiss into a tight hug.

"Indeed, Miss...Septim. Or I suppose I should call you Weiss," Valeria grumbled, glaring at a totally unrepentant Yang. "I am pleased that you have finally taken control of your destiny. Your potential would have been stunted indeed, had you remained under control of that short-sighted man that you once called father,"

"I suppose that is true," Weiss said, smiling as she pried herself away from Ruby. She was somewhat relaxed, for once, knowing that no longer would she have to be worried about having her credit card locked out whenever she refused to answer her father's calls. No longer would she have to worry about whether her future was endangered by the whims of a megalomaniac father that was bent on global economic domination.

"That being said," sighed Valeria, turning to face Yang, "I still wonder whether I should be concerned by your apparent attempt to assist your teammate,"

Yang waved a hand airily. "What? Ice Queen got to be a real princess, and Rubes gets to stick around with her partner and get to be a little more lovey-dovey-"

"Hey!" Ruby and Weiss both exclaimed, their faces burning beet red.

"-and that means I don't have to think about how I'm actually going to use my wish any more! A win-win situation for everyone, right?"

"Hm. We shall see what the future holds, then. Weiss, do be aware that despite being taken in my household as a ward bearing the Septim name, you will not be eligible for succession. Still, I do expect you to behave in a manner befitting a princess of the blood,"

"I understand. I shall not disappoint you," replied Weiss in her best, haughtiest voice, earning a barely-stifled laugh from Yang.

"I should have you know that courtly etiquette is a fine art, Miss Xiao Long," grumbled Valeria in response, "At the very least, Weiss is behaving much like a proper lady, other than a few minor details. But we are not here to discuss the finer points of refined interaction. Beacon Academy is destroyed, and many of its professors have said that they would have little interest in teaching under the supervision of the Legion. This leaves many fine huntsmen and huntresses-in-training without proper tutelage,"

"Yeah, uh...about that...what's going to happen to us? Are you just...going to send us home or something?"

"Not unless you wish it, Miss Rose. The Empire believes in the right of self-determination for every law-abiding citizen. As the closest equivalent to a huntsman would be a member of the Fighters' Guild, I have requested that the Fighters' Guild establish a branch in Vale so that they may continue the training of any huntsman or huntress that wishes to continue on their chosen path. However, for education on Grimm-specific topics, I must admit that we are not particularly well equipped. Professor Port has mentioned that he is willing to teach, but I am...not convinced of his ability to teach,"

Both Ruby and Yang snorted. "Yeah, you could say that again! He's boring, he only likes to talk about himself, and he really only tells us things worth listening to in the last five minutes of class!"

"Then my fears are vindicated. The other alternative is that I request assistance from Signal Academy. From what I understand, your father is a teacher there; as is your...uncle," Valeria muttered, shuddering as she recalled the first and only meeting she had with Qrow. The man was likely less sober than Sanguine at a party in full swing, and that was saying something. "If you could ask whether he would be willing to teach some extra students twice a week, it would be most appreciated. Remuneration is, of course, assured,"

"Sure, I'll get in touch with dad. Hey, Archcat – speaking of dad, I told him about mum being – well, you know, alive again,"

Valeria's ears twitched. "I should not be surprised that you have done so," she groaned resignedly, "Allow me to guess. He has requested that he be allowed to meet her, yes?"

"Uh, more like, he wants to know when she can come back home,"

"Within a year, I believe. I am still uncertain of the true nature of half-vampires, and for everyone's safety, she must remain in my custody until we can determine the extent of her...changes. However, if he desires to meet her, I may be able to arrange a meeting in the coming days,"

"Awesome. Thanks,"

"If that is all, you should all make your way to the Fighters' Guild Vale headquarters. That is the fortified encampment just on the outskirts of Vale, near the ruins of Beacon,"

* * *

In the Shivering Isles, Ra'shamarra was cackling gleefully. She had spotted through her scrying that her jester's partner had wisely jumped out of the doomed Atlesian airship. Whether through a bout of brilliance, or just lunacy born of desperation, the pink-and-brown haired girl had used her parasol as a way to try and glide down safely to the surface. Whatever the case, the inspired way that the girl had decided to escape danger had piqued the ancient khajiit's interest. And so she decided to bring her in to the Shivering Isles, bound in thick ethereal chains.

At first, Ra'shamarra was confused as to why the girl only responded with a glare every time she asked a question. But then she realised what was the problem. The girl was mute!

Well, muteness never stopped anyone from talking. At least when the Daedric Princess of Madness wanted you to talk. Then you talked, even if you didn't want to – or in this case, physically could not. So with a clever bit of restoration magic, the girl could talk. And talk she did, even as she strained against her bindings, cursing like a flea-bitten swashbuckling pirate with a bad case of rum withdrawal. So much so, that Ra'shamarra's grin grew wider with every passing moment. This 'Neo', as Ra'shamarra found she was called, was a particularly amusing specimen of a mortal.

She decided to bring out her jester to obtain more amusement from her.

On seeing Roman Torchwick in a golden cage and wearing a jester's motley, the girl stopped and her face paled – and then grew purple with rage. She looked as though she were about ready to strangle Torchwick; especially as the jester had completely embraced the essence of the Shivering Isles and no longer recognised her.

"That settles it! I haven't seen this much fury, this much anger, this much rage in centuries. Brilliant! Simply brilliant!" crowed Ra'shamarra, clapping slowly as Neo continued to spew out profanities at the thoroughly befuddled Torchwick. Grabbing Neo's shoulder, the cat spun the pink-and-brown girl around. "You are amusing. More so than my jester. Tell me, what do you think of chaos? Disorder? Getting fun out of others' misery?"

Neo paused, raising an eyebrow.

"I've got a Duke of Dementia that's proving to be boring. Too boring. Not enough chaos, not enough destruction. I've been watching your antics in Remnant, and I think you could actually amuse me! Replace him, you will!"

"I'm not your plaything, you damned insane cat! Find a chew-toy or ball of yarn to amuse yourself with!"

Which proved to be a bit more true than Neo ever anticipated. Ra'shamarra actually summoned a gigantic ball of yarn out of thin air – and promptly rolled Neo in the middle of it, before she proceeded to roll it about the throne room while purring loudly, ignoring the terrified screams that Neo gave as she was tumbled about while inside the ball. Eventually, the ball came to a rest and vanished, dropping Neo unceremoniously in a heap at the Princess of Madness' feet.

"You see, you're wrong about one thing. You ARE my plaything! Everybody's my plaything in MY realm. I do as I please, as long as it pleases me!" giggled Ra'shamarra, giving Neo a long lick on her forehead. The diminutive girl blinked once, not quite sure of what exactly just happened – or whether or not what she was seeing was real. She could swear that the cat's robes were shifting colours, as did the carpets around the room. Whatever doubts she had, however, vanished when a large, heavy gold coin was dropped into her lap. Or rather, a whole bag of it.

"Ha! It's so predictable, what you mortals want. Women for the men, men for the women; gold and treasures for some, and food for others. But seeing as you seem to like gold, I think it's gold and treasures for you! And I can tell you that I have a _lot_ more than that...if you do exactly as I say!"

"Why are you doing this?" she asked, tilting her head. The more that Neo thought about whatever possible motives this insane cat could have for giving a thief a bagful of gold, the less she thought she could ever decipher.

"Shh. Don't think. Just do. Thinking is for stiffs! Like my daughter. I'm sure you've met her. After all, she was the one that blew that ship out of the sky! A magnificent bit of chaos she caused, I must say. But that's not relevant now! You took my gold, you're in my employ now. Isn't that right, Torchwick, hm?"

"Yes...mistress..." the orange-haired man slurred, his pupils dilated. A bowl full of moonsugar lay at the bottom of his golden cage, a telltale sign of what he had been using.

"See? Even my jester knows it!"

Neo frowned. As much as she thought of Torchwick as just an accomplice, leaving him to be this cat's plaything seemed to be a bit much for a punishment. "Alright. So a bit of gold, and you give me your...jester, and I'll replace this...Duke of Dementia,"

"Splendid! How truly delightful. Well then, off you go! Put that gold to use, and find out what you need to do from the people in Dementia,"

"W-Wait, you aren't going to point me to where I need to go?" Neo sputtered out, her eyes widening in surprise. How was someone supposed to do a job without instructions?

"Well, if I told you where to go by pointing exactly where you need to go at every second of the day, things would get boring pretty quick, I'd say. So just to spice things up, I'd say...nope. I'm not going to point you to where you need to go. Just know that Dementia is that-a-way-" she pointed at a purple-and-black door on her left "-and that the Dark Seducers will put you in jail if they find you doing something that breaks the law. And when that happens, you get put before me, for JUDGMENT! Oh, how I love judging people. Especially the pastrycooks. The ones that can't bake proper pies get PUNISHED! By baking them into a proper pie. Mmm...pie. Brain pie. Care to donate?"

Deciding that she was completely and utterly unnerved by the cat's ramblings, Neo zoomed out of the throne room and into Dementia. She didn't know what to do, but whatever it was that she needed to do was good – as long as she got as far away from that insane cat as was humanly possible.

* * *

Later that night, once Valeria had finished washing herself and had changed into her sleepwear, she walked into her private suite to catch some well-earned rest. The moment that she had slipped under her bedcovers, however, she found the gentle caress of a cool hand on her cheek.

"Serana, my love," she purred, returning the caress with a gentle bump of her forehead against the ancient vampire's own, "It has been too long since we have had some time to ourselves,"

"That would be the understatement of the century," Serana snarked. A silence fell between the two of them, broken moments later by their muffled giggles. "Years upon years. We've both been too busy, haven't we? You have a knack for dragging us into wars in one plane, and now in this one too. I'm starting to think that your chancellor and his diplomats aren't doing their jobs properly,"

"If only things could all be solved by words. But you are aware that war never changes, my love," Valeria replied, finishing her head-rub and giving Serana a wet kiss on her cheek, "Peace is only a temporary ceasefire between wars, and the only way to resolve it is to bring all under the rule of a single nation,"

"I never knew statecraft was a topic appropriate for pillow talk,"

"It is not. However, you were the one to initiate this line of thought,"

"Fine, I give. Let's move on to something more...interesting, shall we?" said Serana, licking her lips coyly.

"I think that's something that we could both agree on. A splendid idea,"

Before they were both lost in the flames of passion, several thoughts flashed through Valeria's mind. She had beaten back an enemy that Vale – and indeed, the rest of Remnant – had thought undefeatable for as long as they could remember. She saved most of the citizens from a gruesome death at the hands of the Grimm hordes, and the huntsmen and huntresses had been inspired to actually push back the Grimm and reclaim lands from beyond the walls of their kingdom. In a few years, where would they be?

A kiss silenced her any more of her thoughts that rose up. The future could wait, and Azura would deal with it anyway. What was in front of her was infinitely more interesting.

* * *

A/N:

And that concludes the Battle of Beacon and its aftermath - and the main part of this story. There may be additional discontinuous chapters which follow on after this point, depending on whether or not I find a particular inspiration to write a chapter.

To those that have reviewed, thank you for taking the time to do so. To those that have read, I hope that you have enjoyed reading this as much as I have writing it. Letting the inspiration of the madgod flow through you is a very liberating experience; writing totally non-sequitur things is incredibly, incredibly amusing.


	36. Extra 1: To a Brighter Dawn

"Weiss Septim. This is a letter notifying you that you will be required in the Imperial City on the first of Hearthfire, to bear witness to the wedding of Serana Volkihar and Her Majesty, Valeria Septim, the First of her Name. The bearer of this letter and the party accompanying the bearer shall be allowed access to the Temple of the One-"

"Ruby, what did I tell you about reading letters meant for me?" grumbled Weiss, rubbing her eyes as she walked down the stairs of their shared shop-apartment.

Valeria had given Weiss a supply of alchemical ingredients and useful plants, as well as a complete set of laboratory equipment as a parting gift. With it, and a small loan of golden drakes from J'Bari, she was able to set up an alchemical apothecary and garden next to the Mages' Guild of Vale, which doubled as both their home in Vale and a way for Team RWBY to support themselves financially. Though she was certain she could have just asked Valeria or Ra'shamarra for some cash, there were certain Schnee traits that were particularly difficult to erase overnight. Such as an overwhelming desire to prove oneself.

"Sorry, Weiss, but I couldn't resist! I mean, it even has that awesome wax seal on it and all, and it's in this fancy brown paper-"

"Parchment, you dolt. It's really hard to find in Remnant, but...wait, did you say it had a wax seal on it?"

"Yeah! One of the Imperial Dragon,"

"That's Archmage Sep- I mean, _mother_ 's seal. What does it say? She hasn't written to us in months,"

"We're invited to her wedding!"

"What? It's that time already? But I haven't finished my studies!"

Ruby pouted and zoomed up to Weiss, putting her in a friendly headlock and rubbing her knuckles against her girlfriend's temples. "Ah! Let me go!"

"You can study later. This is more important. Besides, it's in a week's time, so we've got some time to prepare,"

"Yeah, Ice Queen. Archcat's kind of more important than your studies. She's what, your mother?" Yang chuckled. Neither of them had noticed Yang walking up the stairs to their living area, with Blake following closely behind, dragging her feet as she went.

"Yang! How did training go?"

"Badly," moaned Blake, collapsing into a nearby sofa. "Legion training is nothing like any of Beacon's classes. They made us run around the whole city,"

"Around the whole city? That was all?" Ruby asked, tilting her head. That wasn't a particularly hard task for any of them.

"Yeah. Around the whole city, on the walls, five times. Made us go up and down ladders as we came to each guard tower. And you know how many there are in the city now,"

That was enough to make Ruby blanch. "Okay. That's actually quite nasty,"

"Yeah, go figure. At least I only needed to bench iron," Yang said lightly as she scratched Blake's ears. No longer did the faunus girl have to wear a bow; racial equality was strictly enforced in Imperial law, with offenders being locked in stocks for half a day for every individual offence. Progress for true acceptance among Remnant humans had been slow, but at least nobody dared to voice or display their hate for faunus any longer. "Sucks to be you, since you volunteered for infiltrator training. Everyone knows that Hides-in-Plain-Sight is a real hard ass when it comes to drills and exercises,"

"Keep rubbing it in, and you're going to find yourself sleeping on this sofa tonight, Yang," grumbled Blake.

The blonde was quick to make amends, picking up the cat faunus and giving her a light peck on her cheek. "Well, since you put it that way, I guess I'll stop. You guys don't mind if I and Blake use the bathroom first, do you? We don't exactly smell like roses at the moment,"

Weiss took a sniff and recoiled at the stench. How the two managed to work up such a terrible sweat in the cold of late Valean autumn was beyond her. Wordlessly, she waved them off, keen on ridding her living room of the horrible smell of rank sweat.

"Cool. Thanks,"

"Just make sure you don't make too much of a mess in there. Ruby had to clean up after you two last night,"

"And the night before!"

"And the night before, yes,"

Yang simply pretended to not have heard the two, slamming the bathroom door shut after she hauled Blake in. Ruby sighed, knowing that her sister would likely make another huge mess with the bath again. A mess that she would have to clean up.

"You know, sometimes I wonder how mum cooks, cleans, hunts Grimm and still had enough time to look after both Yang and myself," sighed Ruby, kicking at the wooden floor dejectedly, "I'm trying to do the same, and I sometimes can't keep a handle on everything,"

"Well, you'll eventually get there. I'm sure of it," Weiss said, prying Ruby's arms from around herself and turning to face the red reaper. Grinning evilly, she then added, "As you will when it comes to fashion. I will not attend a wedding with you wearing combat boots!"

Ruby's face paled. "Not the lady stilts! Anything but the stupid lady stilts!"

* * *

On the other side of the city, however, there was something different happening. Pyrrha had finally gotten her wish; the yellow-themed boy that was her team leader had finally realised what she was after. The two were alone in one of the city's new parks, out on a tiny island on a mirror-smooth lake.

Together. Alone. In a secluded grove, seated under a rose bush that had been shaped into a giant love heart. Totally, completely coincidental – or so she would have him believe.

"Hey, Pyrrha. You know, I couldn't help but think about what Archmage Septim said, way back then,"

 _Oh my. Is he actually...?_

"I mean..." Jaune said slowly, pausing after a moment. He rubbed the back of his head, the same way as he normally did when he was nervous. Was that a slight blush on his cheek that she saw? She held her breath in anticipation, "I mean, you've always been there for me. We're partners, right? Back then, I didn't even know how to swing a blade straight. But you spent your time at night teaching me how to fight properly. You unlocked my Aura, and you pretty much keep Team JNPR running,"

 _He finally noticed! My team leader finally noticed me! This is a great day!_

"So uh, I just thought back to what Archmage Septim said. You've always had my back, every single time; from the time we met during our initiation, all the way till...well, now. I, uh, don't think that I've ever done anything for you to thank you properly, so...I don't really know how to say this,"

Her cheeks felt like they were ablaze. It was happening! He was reaching into his pocket! She could see it now; a box, with a ring in it. With him on one knee, presenting the ring for her to take.

"...Ugh, I must've kept it in my pocket for too long,"

 _He's been planning this?! And I never noticed?_

"...It's kind of melted," he chuckled nervously.

 _What_.

"How does something like that...melt?" Pyrrha gasped in shock. Surely Jaune's back pocket was not the same temperature as a furnace. His Semblance was not fire.

After a few more moments, Jaune fished out whatever it was he had in his back pocket. Pyrrha let out a disappointed sigh as she saw a golden wrapping with gaudy red text on it.

Chocolate. Jaune only had a chocolate bar in his fingers. It was somewhat deformed, but it was unmistakably wrapped in distinctive the gold-and-red wrapping of the best chocolatier in Vale. He offered it up with a silly grin on his face, and she had no choice but to accept it.

"Thanks...Jaune," Pyrrha choked out, forcing a smile to her lips while fighting back tears. Perhaps she was expecting too much from him. Perhaps he wasn't even interested in her in that way.

 _One that tries may fail, but one that never tries can never succeed._

Maybe there was one more thing that she could do. She looked at the chocolate bar. It was long and narrow, and it was slowly melting in her hands. Yes, there was indeed one more thing she could do. One more try at something completely new.

Opening the wrapper, she gave the chocolate a slow, languid lick, making sure to smear her lips and tongue as much as she could. "Jaune," she spoke, in a low, sultry tone which made the young man raise an eyebrow. Before he could react, she threw her arms around him and pulled him into a deep kiss. One that he didn't break away from, or even show any form of resistance.

 _Maybe that chocolate was good for something after all_ , she thought to herself.

* * *

Ren and Nora had decided to take some time off, visiting Nirn on a long tour to see what a world without Grimm was like. A world that had seen unbroken peace for at least a thousand years, unburdened by war and monsters. What they had seen – the people that were well-fed and well cared for – touched them deeply. Only in the largest cities of Remnant could people be so joyful, so carefree; and at that point, Ren knew his calling in life. Spreading the Imperial Peace, the Pax Nirnia, on Remnant.

To give people a taste of what they had never had a chance to taste. To give people a second chance at a true life, unlike those of his birth village.

And to do that, he needed to enlist with the Legion. He had heard that they planned to purge the planet of Grimm, reshaping the land as they went. He had also heard that it would take a very long time; ten years, twenty years, thirty years – maybe even fifty – but he did not care. If at the end of it, no child had to witness their friends and family be slain by merciless Grimm, it would be worth it.

Nora had been all too happy to follow him. After all, what more did she want? Ren, his pancakes – and an opportunity to break some legs, all in one place. It was a dream come true for her.

* * *

Neo found herself smiling contentedly on her throne made of the swords, maces and hammers of those that she had eliminated in the dead of night. She had removed the old Duke of Dementia – which apparently made her into the new Duchess of Dementia – and she found that she loved the power that came with the title. The crazy cat that owned the entire island even kept her word, and gave Roman Torchwick to her to do with as she pleased.

Her inner council kept her half of New Sheoth running as efficiently as it should. For now, she busied herself by pilfering everything valuable that wasn't nailed down. It caused chaos, and made her a little bit richer every time she did so; and the crazy cat seemed to love it when open brawls happened in the streets, thanks to her actions. In any event, who was she to complain about a world where she was free to mess with people's minds – and was even encouraged to do so? She would have been mad to turn this opportunity down, especially when the alternative was a slow and painful death.

"Roman, dear, fetch me another blood sausage, would you?" Neo asked sweetly of the terrified Roman Torchwick. The man was now back in his familiar white trench coat and had his bowler hat and cane, but the shackles and chains about his legs showed everyone who owned him.

Her.

He was hers to do with as she pleased. As it was with every other one of her 'subjects'. Still, she had not found him boring yet. As long as he pleased her, she had no reason to replace him.

Replace him. Such an impersonal term. But appropriate. She held up her hand that was holding a goblet, and another shackled servant poured her another glass of wine.

Life was good. Power was even better. And she was certain of one thing. She would not share it with anyone.

"My precious," she hissed lowly, stroking the sharp edges of her throne of iron blades. This was hers. And hers alone. She would not give it up to anyone. Not now, not ever.

* * *

A/N:

And the first round of extra shorts has come about! There may be more inbound, depending on the amount of inspiration that I acquire over time. Sacrifice ALL the cabbages, yarn and cheese to Sheogorath, for madness is only the first step to inspired genius!


	37. Extra 2: The Wedding

Weiss took a deep breath as she listened to her partner's rapid-fire speech for what seemed to be the hundredth time that day. "Weiss! Weiss! Do I look okay? Is everything in place?" Ruby said quickly, virtually jumping up and down on the spot nervously.

"Yes, you look wonderful, Ruby," Weiss replied, her left eye twitching.

Valeria had been kind enough to supply them with formal dresses, and an entire staff of stylists to help them get prepared. They had been informed that they would be the maids of honour at the wedding only a week before the actual event, owing to a bit of miscommunication between Nirn and Remnant. And that meant that Ruby was _extremely_ jittery from all the excitement. More so than when she had accidentally included moonsugar in a batch of cookies, and ate half of them before she realised that something was terribly wrong.

For her part, Weiss was actually very much amazed by the sheer opulence that Valeria had opted for. Her dress was a strapless white silk gown, with deep pleats about the broad-bottomed flared skirt. The short train behind the skirt had been painstakingly embroidered in honest-to-Zenithar silver thread. Or rather, the entire back of the dress, as well as parts of the front. An Imperial Dragon decorated the elbow-length silk gloves on each wrist. Pearls and diamonds were liberally scattered over the dress, making the entire ensemble glitter as though stars had been woven into them. To top it all off, they had been given platinum tiaras; hers was crusted with diamonds and sapphires, the largest sapphire above her brow the size of a chicken's egg. Ruby's was nearly identical, though with diamonds and rubies.

She supposed that being an empress of an interstellar empire allowed one to purchase ridiculously expensive things on a whim; but Valeria was definitely not one for excessive jewelry or ornamentation. Dust, sometimes when she had to sit in some of the Advanced Destruction classes in the Arcane University, some of the Master-Wizards would wear more gold and jewels than she did. And from what little she had seen of the sessions in the Imperial Senate, Valeria could not get rid of her crown quickly enough at the end of each session, as though the golden crown burned her. Which likely meant that her soon-to-be wife – Archmage Serana – was the one that suggested, or perhaps even designed, the clothes that they all received.

"Alright, Ruby, there's still a few more minutes before we have to collect my mother from her carriage. Have you learned to walk gracefully with your heels yet?"

A small smirk graced Weiss' lips when Ruby nodded. The stylists had achieved the impossible. Well, maybe a few enchantments enhancing stability and comfort might have helped, but to think that Ruby could finally walk in them without tripping? She wished that she knew about the stability enchantments before the Beacon Ball.

"Alright, ladies, it's showtime!" barked a staff member. A gruff male orsimer, who was oddly enamoured by dresses, lace, lipstick and makeup. "Her Majesty's carriage has just passed the Market District. They will be here in less than five minutes; get to your positions in front of the Temple of the One. The other bridesmaids will be there as well. Hop to it!"

The man waved them along, flanked by the other female staff members who curtsied as they passed. Weiss felt Ruby's hand grip her own tightly as they scuttled past. It felt very strange – and somewhat improper – for the huntresses to be treated like so. Nevertheless, they were part of the imperial royal household now, and the people on Nirn seemed to treat the nobility and royalty with greater reverence than Remnant did their own.

"I don't know about wearing dresses and not having weapons," Ruby whispered nervously to Weiss. "It feels like I'm missing something really close to me,"

The heiress nodded, knowing exactly what Ruby was going through. There weren't any Grimm on Nirn, but there were still threats around. Threats like the Dawnguard, who seemed to bear a terrible grudge against Valeria and Serana. Their households and friends, likewise, had been targeted, but thankfully the Imperial Inquisition was as efficient as they said at rooting out the would-be assassins. Hopefully, the Inquisition would come through again on this even more important event.

Stepping out of one of the side exits to the enormous cathedral, Weiss caught a glimpse of the vast crowd that had gathered on the streets. Well, streets would not be enough to describe it. Every apartment that lined the Temple District's roads were draped in festive golds and reds, and flower girls on the roofs and roads alike were scattering rose petals onto the road in a shower of pink, red and white. Priests and priestesses with perfume censers lined the avenue that led to the great temple, murmuring their orisons to the gods and blessing all who were present to witness. The flagged stone walkway leading to the cathedral had a broad carpet of thick crimson velvet rolled out, all the way to the edge of the road.

And on one side of it, there was Blake and Yang, holding bouquets of red roses. Like Ruby and Weiss, the two of them were clad in same white silk dresses. Blake's tiara had deep violet amethysts studded in it; her ears were no longer covered, proudly displaying her faunus heritage for all to see. Yang's had some kind of golden-yellow gems that glowed with an inner fire, almost as though the sun itself had been captured and frozen.

"You two are the other bridesmaids, right?" whispered an attendant florist. She held two bouquets out to them. "Go now! You two are almost late!"

Nodding her thanks, Weiss took the bouquet of flowers and quickly made her way to the red carpet, lining up in front of Blake and Yang. From the corner of her eye, she could see Team JNPR inside the cathedral past the open double doors; Nora was waving vigorously to catch their attention, while Ren desperately tried to get her to behave. She couldn't see what Jaune and Pyrrha were doing, but she hoped that they were at least behaving themselves.

The steady thumping of boots marching on stone could be heard approaching. Legion soldiers in their dress uniforms stood at the ready, halting any curious bystanders from wandering onto the road. Slowly, a gold-and-black carriage made its way around a corner, drawn by a pair of enormous midnight-black destriers. A squad of Legion officers marched their way in front, wearing their ceremonial golden armour instead of their usual black.

"Hear ye, hear ye! Her Majesty, Valeria Septim, the first of her name, Empress of the Nirnian Empire, approaches!" a herald cried out as he marched in front of the Legion soldiers. Bystanders, human, elf or beast, all bowed as the carriage passed.

The carriage ground to a halt in front of the cathedral. All of those present knelt and bowed their heads as the door opened. Except for the four bridesmaids, of course, who simply stood and looked straight forward. Just as they had been instructed to.

Valeria was the first to step out of the carriage. She was wearing her formal Imperial regalia, in the northern Nordic fashion; a gilded black satin dress crusted with innumerable rubies, with lavish golden embroidery weaving their way around the gems. The dress itself was shorter than any of the bridesmaids'; her black fur-trimmed boots showed beneath the hem. Over these, and around her shoulders, was a red, hooded cloak, trimmed with thick, pure white fur. A golden brooch completed the ensemble, pinning the cloak neatly to the left of her breast.

And then, after the snow-white khajiit had disembarked, she held out her hand to the carriage's remaining occupant. Yang could no longer hold back a gasp on seeing Serana, and Weiss herself had to admit that she was ever so slightly jealous of Valeria's choice of wife. Serana, stately in even her mages' robes, was utterly stunning when she was properly dressed up.

Like Valeria, she was wearing a black dress, though this one hugged her figure quite closely. At first glance, it appeared to be plain; but after squinting, Weiss could make out the countless shining onyxes that studded its surface. Cascades of black silk trailed out from a sash on her waist, mingling with the black-and-silver that formed the proper train of her dress. In her hands was a bouquet of belladonna flowers, their dark purple blooms completing her image of a mysterious, enchanting beauty.

The sudden noise of the musicians inside the cathedral starting to play the wedding serenade shook the bridesmaids out of their stupor. They hurried behind, picking up the trailing parts of the brides' dresses and holding them up. The bright day outside soon gave way to the dimly-lit interior of the cathedral. The stained glass windows cast a rainbow of bright colours on the floor, while the officiating priest stood in front of a gigantic brazier that burned with a bright blue flame, flanked by the gigantic statue of a dragon.

Well, a dragon that was Valeria's father, before he turned to stone for borrowing the power of the gods.

"It's happening, Weiss, it's really happening!" Ruby whispered excitedly. Weiss merely returned with the barest of curt nods.

The priest, once the wedding party had arrived in front of him, seemed to be rather hesitant in what he was about to do next. It was not every day that an archpriest of Mara was asked to officiate a wedding for Imperial royalty, after all; and most certainly not that of two known vampires, in the largest and most sacred temple in all of the Empire! Regardless, he knew that Mara would not stand in the way of love. Even if that love would be distasteful to any of the other deities.

"Those present, please be silent," the elderly priest spoke into a voice-amplifying orb. The musicians playing halted, and what little chatter inside and outside of the cathedral hushed. "Today, we who are present bear witness to a sacred union between two lovers. In our midst, here stands Empress Valeria Septim, the first of her name; and Lady Serana of House Volkihar, Lady of Castle Volkihar, Countess of Winterhold,"

He paused for a little, recalling the next part of what he was meant to say.

"In the ages past, Mother Mara bestowed upon us the gift of love. One soul was meant to find another, for in loneliness one may never find contentment. For each soul had a partner, for which it yearns. Without the other, one lives a hollow life; one without meaning nor purpose. Thus, when two matching souls meet, Mother Mara bade us to share in their joy; to witness the completion of a pair of souls is a beautiful thing indeed,"

Valeria allowed herself a small smile, which Serana returned in kind. The guests inside the cathedral all stood, removing their coronets and tiaras in a sign of respect. All of them were high nobility, except for Team JNPR; sheepishly, they simply bowed their heads, not having a piece of headwear to remove.

"And so, on this sixteenth day of Frost Fall, we gather to bear witness to such a union. Through all trials and tribulations, through times of peace and prosperity, we hope that their love will last. Do you, Valeria Septim, take Serana Volkihar as your wife?"

"I do,"

"Do you, Serana Volkihar, accept Valeria Septim as your wife?"

"I do,"

"And do you, Serana Volkihar, vow that you will remain faithful to her in all things; through times of trial, and times of plenty, through times of strife and times of peace?"

"I do,"

"And do you, Valeria Septim, accept this vow, and reciprocate in kind?"

"I do. Now, and forever; till death do us part, to Aetherius and beyond," Valeria spoke firmly, holding Serana's hands in her own.

"If any would object to the union of the two before us, speak now, or forever hold your peace!"

Not a single person spoke out. The smile on Valeria's face grew ever wider.

"Then, by the power vested in me by Mother Mara and the Church of the Nine Divines, I pronounce the two of you wife...and wife. You may now kiss!"

Valeria leant over and rubbed her forehead against Serana's own. It was difficult and messy for khajiit to kiss as men or mer do; but Serana had other plans, and cupped Valeria's cheeks with both her hands. Leaning in, she kissed her wife full on the lips, to thunderous applause.

None clapped more loudly than a certain harlequin-robed khajiit with a silly grin on her face, sitting on a chandelier high above the congregation.

* * *

A/N:

Something fluffy this way comes. Very fluffy. Fluffiness off the charts!


	38. Extra 3: That Which Was Once Imagined

"I must admit, daughter, that I am somewhat surprised by your choice," Valeria spoke to Weiss. "However, this is your dissertation, and therefore the choice of how you intend to demonstrate it is up to you,"

The two of them were standing in the middle of a desert inside the Kingdom of Vacuo. A large white metal sphere was suspended over the desolate landscape by ethereal chains, which hung from seven thick, silvery pillars surrounding it. All of this was almost five miles away from them on a level desert plain, where swirling dust clouds blew across the desolate landscape. A large SDC snowflake with the Imperial Dragon superimposed upon it – Weiss' personal emblem, which she had adopted after Jacques had disinherited her for supporting Faunus equality – was clearly visible on the sphere.

"You don't have to worry about this, mother. By my calculations and projections, this device should work," Weiss said crisply. Turning around, she looked at her audience. The Council of Vacuo, who Valeria had been courting for the last five years into joining Remnant's nascent planetary government, were present behind thickly-shielded stands.

They had heard about how Eastern Sanus had been resculpted by Imperial magitechnology. Mountains had been cracked open by controlled orbital bombardment, revealing vast veins of ores and Dust deposits. Rivers were deepened and widened by the work of magickal creatures brought in from other planes of existence. Forests cleaned of all Grimm presence by liberal use of summoning disks. And most of all, the establishment of large, shielded and walled settlements where there was once only wilderness. It sounded too good to be true, had Vacuan visitors to Vale not reported the exact same thing when they returned.

And now they wanted a demonstration of what the Empire would mean to them. Valeria's patient negotiation of a diplomatic annexation could only take them so far. Without winning the hearts and minds of those living in the new territories, unrest was a certainty. To the Empress, there was one sure way of conquering the hearts of those present; striking fear so great into them that they would be cowed into submission. But Weiss saw another alternative.

To the left of the Vacuan Council members, however, there was another set of observers. These ones wore the red and gold ceremonial robes of the Conclave of Mages; the highest authority in the Mages' Guild. Which so happened to include Valeria, as the first member of the nine Archmages of Nirn. She and Serana had to recuse themselves from assessing Weiss' Archmage dissertation project, owing to their familial relationship. Which meant that the remaining seven, silent and foreboding as they were, had the ultimate say on whether or not Weiss' project was sufficient to admit her into the ranks of the Archmages.

Something that Weiss was keenly aware of. She gulped when she caught sight of Archmage Neloth Telvanni's disapproving gaze. The ancient dunmer archmage was thousands of years old; nearly as old as Serana, and a terrifyingly powerful mage. On either side of him were Archmages Carmine of High Rock and Ra'kethra of Corinthe, who were both surveying her with inscrutable expressions. Four other archmages were present; she knew that they were from Black Marsh, Summerset, Hammerfell and Silvenar, but hadn't met them in person to know them better. Regardless, they all wore masks of utter indifference.

"Remember that if your dissertation fails to impress them, you will have to wait another three years before you will be eligible to present another one. Remember that you must win the approval of at least half of them in order to be accepted as a fellow archmage," Serana chimed in, a crooked grin on her face. "No pressure, Weiss,"

"You can do this, Weissy!" cheered Ruby, hugging her tightly. Weiss squirmed; even though Ruby had rocketed through the ranks of the Fighters' Guild on Remnant, her nearly sickeningly saccharine personality had not mellowed one bit. It seemed that the gruffness of the hardened veterans from Nirn had failed to temper her in the least; rather, her overly eager disposition seemed to have rubbed off on them instead.

"Ah! Get off me!" Weiss yelped, squirming to get away from Ruby. "Don't you have a contract or something to attend to?"

"Ehhh...I might have told Burz gro-Khash to do it for me," she chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of her head. "You're not mad at me, are you, Weiss?"

"...Why would you give up a contract?" Weiss asked, her eyes twitching.

"Because being here for you is more important? I mean, it's only a nest of thirty beowolves. Burz's team can handle it,"

Valeria coughed softly. "Weiss. It is nearly time. Preparations at the test device are complete, and the assistants are now at a safe distance,"

"Ah. Very well, mother," she said to Valeria. Turning to Ruby, she whispered, "Don't think that you've gotten away from this, _my wife_. I don't take dereliction of duty very kindly. We will be having a talk later,"

Ruby gulped and sped away to an empty space in the stands. Weiss shook her head as she smiled slightly. As much as Ruby vexed her at times, her puppy-like behaviour was undoubtedly the greatest stress-reliever in her life.

"Shall we start?"

"Very well," Weiss said. Taking a deep breath, she took the podium in front of the assembled audience. "Honoured guests; the Council of Vacuo and the Conclave of Mages; I thank you for coming to bear witness to one of the latest developments in Nirnian magitechnology. It is humbling to be in the presence of such great and noble minds, and I can only hope that what I present today will be worthy of your time,"

Neloth puffed up proudly and nodded. The dunmer was prideful; Weiss knew this. She needed to play to his ego to win his vote. Ra'kethra, on the other hand, crossed his arms. The gruff old khajiit cared only about results; flowery words were unlikely to swing him to her side. Carmine was politely listening, as were the other archmages. Carmine only cared for the advancement of magical theory, and little else. As for the others, she did not know much about them.

"The deserts of Vacuo have long been an uninhabitable wasteland. Roasted by an unforgiving sun through the day, chilled by freezing air at night. Winds bearing flesh-tearing sandstorms rip across the sands, while soothing water may only be found in oases, few and far apart. These lands are harsh, but from a harsh land comes a strong people. But one people alone will not be sufficient to thrive. Alone, we are weak; together, we are strong,"

"Get on with the demonstration," interrupted Ra'kethra, "Khajiit believes that idle talk is as useful as a passing wind. Inconsequential and valueless,"

Weiss' eye twitched, but she kept her composure. Valeria was much more terrifying on bad days, and she would not let this old khajiit get to her. "Very well, then. Let us skip the pleasantries and proceed to the main event. You have all been provided with sunglasses. Once everyone wears them, I shall begin the countdown. Do not think of taking them off before I have said so; this will be brighter than bright, and I will not be held responsible for any loss of eyesight if you ignore safety precautions,"

Everyone slipped on their sunglasses.

"Alright. Now, let us begin,"

"Ten,"

"Nine,"

"Eight,"

"Seven,"

"Six,"

"Five,"

"Four,"

"Three,"

"Two,"

"One,"

"Firing,"

Weiss pressed on a trigger she held in her hand, and the whole desert landscape glowed a brilliant, blinding white. Her ears were left ringing as a tremendous shockwave very nearly knocked her to the ground; had she not been wearing boots with stability enchantments on them, she was certain that she would have been flat on her back in the sand. The cool air rushed past her, damp and laden with water. Little by little, she regained her eyesight, and she had to restrain a whoop of joy as she witnessed the success of her project. And judging by the shocked gasps of the Vacuan Council behind her, they were as equally impressed.

"Behold, the culmination of four years of research into the energies of the aetherial plane," she declared. The members of the Vacuan Council stood up, gaping in awe at what they had just seen.

No longer was there a desert landscape. No longer were there barren rocks, standing alone in their silent watch over the empty land. No longer were there swirling sandstorms that sought to strip away skin and flesh from bone. No longer was there a scorching, sweltering heat that made one sweat profusely, even in the shade.

Sand morphed into soil, covered by lush green grass. Trees sprouted from the earth in abundance, covered in flowers and laden with wild fruits. Lifeless rocks that once stood in dry desert sands cracked open and spouted clean, fresh water from the depths of the earth. Lakes and ponds sprang up where dips once were in the empty dunes, sparkling in the sun. A cool breeze blew on their faces, easing away the heat of the day. And in the middle of all this was the white sphere suspended by chains from pillars, now glowing green with power; a beating heart of a living landscape several miles wide. A beacon of teeming life in the middle of a barren desert land.

"Is this...real?"

"This is certainly real, councillor," Weiss said, beaming, "The device that I have invented is a fusion of Nirnian magitech and native Remnant Dust alchemy. Dust is not merely a convenient power source. It is literally a crystallised, refined residue of Remnant's life energies. With this terraformer and some Dust crystals, barren lands can be made fertile again,"

One of the council members looked thoughtful. "Could it be used to restore industrial wastelands? I fear that years under your father's-"

Now that struck a nerve. "With all due respect, councillor," said Weiss, her smile faltering, "I would request that you do not associate Jacques Schnee with myself. He is dead to me, as I am to him. But to answer your question, I regret that I say I do not know for sure. The Nirnian Empire has strict environmental controls on industry, and all emissions must be scrubbed clean. As a result, there are no industrial districts to test this on. However, if you are willing to provide a second test site, I believe that we may be able to see if it can indeed be used to restore industrial wastelands,"

"Well, that settles it, then. How much would it cost to acquire these devices? We would really like to see Vacuo restored to its original state, before Mantle and Atlas turned our beautiful land into their scrapyard,"

Turning to Valeria, Weiss nodded. "That would have to be discussed with my mother, Empress Valeria Septim. I shall surrender the stage to her, as I believe that the Conclave of Archmages and I now have some things to discuss,"

"Not yet, kitten," Ra'kethra spoke, standing up. There was a crooked grin on his face. The other archmages, likewise, stood up. "Remain where you are,"

Weiss was confused. Did she do something wrong? Was it not enough?

Neloth was the first to speak. "Well, to think that House Telvanni had never dared to even think of morphing the land itself! The simplicity of this invention of yours – and the scale and magnitude of the effect imparted – it is magnificent. This development is useful beyond your comprehension. If you had been a member of House Telvanni, I would have been glad to take you on as an apprentice. But as it stands, your dissertation is impressive enough to gain my attention. I approve of this,"

"As is this one's approval. The badlands of Elsweyr may once again teem with life," purred Ra'kethra, "Poison marshes may be cleared, grasslands restored, and dustbowls watered. This is a wondrous invention,"

"Though High Rock has no wastelands to speak of, I can certainly see the usefulness of this invention. I, Carmine of High Rock, grant you my approval,"

That was three. Weiss was elated. She only needed one more to finally be recognised as an Archmage in her own right! One by one, the other archmages likewise gave their approval. Black Marsh. Hammerfell. Silvenar. And even the snobbish elf from Summerset! She had the approval of all seven! Looking to her side, Valeria was smiling proudly, as was Serana.

Ra'kethra conjured a portal, from which a dremora butler appeared, bearing a box and a richly-embroidered white-and-purple robe with a matching fur-trimmed hood. From inside the box, he pulled out a silver staff with a massive purple crystal on top of it the size of a fist. Carmine collected the robe, while he held on to the staff.

"I, Archmage Valeria Septim, the first of her name, bear witness to the culmination of magickal research made by Weiss Septim," Valeria intoned, "The Conclave of Archmages are also present to bear witness to the demonstration of said research. The research in question is a proof of the applicant's worthiness to be counted as an archmage; as one of our peers, and as an equal in intellect and magickal aptitude. Should she be found worthy, she shall be counted among our number. Should she be found wanting, she shall be cast back into the ranks of the ordinary mages of our guild until she attempts again to demonstrate her mastery over her field,"

"We have borne witness to the demonstration, and I, Carmine Tristard, Archmage of High Rock, declare that I find her research sufficient. Are there any among our peers that would dispute this finding?"

All were silent.

"Then, with the blessing of the Conclave of Archmages, I declare that Weiss Septim has achieved mastery in her field of Alteration," Valeria spoke. "That which was once imagined becomes reality in her wake. Bring forth the symbols of her new rank,"

Carmine and Ra'kethra walked forward. The elderly khajiit slipped the robes around Weiss' shoulders, while Carmine handed Weiss the silver staff. "Bear the mantle of power responsibly. An archmage wields considerable power over the elements, over reality and the immaterial things and all in between. One ought to remain mindful that with great power, comes great responsibility. Use it to bring prosperity and peace," spoke Ra'kethra. He took a step back and gave a small bow.

"Bear the staff of knowledge with an even hand," Carmine said sombrely, "As long as any thirst for knowledge of what is good, you must provide. Those that ask for the purposes of bettering their fellow man must not be turned away. Those that seek the forbidden arts must be rebuked. And those that stray and allow their might to grow beyond their wisdom must be brought back to reason. Judge well the worth of knowledge and its seekers,"

She took a step back and gave a slight curtsy.

"We, the Conclave of Archmages, declare Weiss Septim as being worthy of her rank. May she serve well in her capacity as the bringer of light and knowledge in the Kingdom of Vale, and be the foremost among peers in all of Remnant," they said in unison.

* * *

A/N

So, that concludes Weiss' story - and Ruby's as well, by extension. Sometimes, a great gift - and promise of more to come - works wonders in annexing a territory without force. Next, I think I'm going to cover Summer's part-Vampirism issue.

Hope you guys had fun reading this, as much as I did writing it!


	39. Extra 4: The Curse of Eternity

"Miss Rose and Mr. Xiao Long. Please be patient while we call Archmages Septim and Septim to meet you in the atrium,"

Ruby nervously found a seat and sat down in the atrium of Vale's Mages' Guild. On any other day, it would have been nothing out of the ordinary. She did, after all, live in the penthouse of the Mages' Guild, along with her wife. But today was anything but an ordinary day. Her mother-in-law – or better known to everyone as Valeria I Septim, had arrived in Vale, and brought with her Ruby's birth mother.

"It's been nearly twenty years, Ruby," murmured Taiyang. His hands were shaking with excitement. "Nearly twenty years since I thought she was dead – and I got a call from _Valeria Septim_ herself about the fact that Summer is still alive? And that YOU knew about it, and didn't tell me?"

"Daaaad," whined Ruby, "It's not like I had a choice. Valeria said that we needed to keep it quiet,"

"I still would've liked a warning before something this big comes around, Ruby. You know how much I missed her," her dad spoke quietly, his eyes misting over.

A series of soft footsteps echoed on the atrium's marble floor. Ruby looked up and her jaw went slack. There, in front of her, was Valeria, leaning rather heavily on her staff. Her plain robes were looser than usual – and if Ruby wasn't mistaken, her belly was much larger than last time they had met, almost eight months back.

Eight months. And a much larger belly. She had read something about eight months – or rather heard about it, after Weiss read an informational leaflet aloud when her monthly problem vanished right after their honeymoon trip. There was only one way to interpret those signs.

Her brain immediately short-circuited. She needed to get little cat toys after this.

"Oh. My. Dust," she said, clamping her hand over her mouth. "Congratulations, Valeria!"

"I would appreciate if you would keep all noise to a minimum, Miss Rose," groused Valeria, her ears flattening against her skull, "The potions I am taking give me a truly terrible headache,"

Weiss was right behind Valeria. Ruby zoomed off to hold her up, pelting her with kisses on the cheek as the red reaper decided that standing up was not appropriate for her also heavily-pregnant wife. "Get off me, you dolt!" screeched Weiss, trying – and failing – to shake Ruby off her arm.

"Miss Rose, I believe the bedroom is a more appropriate venue to debauch my daughter in," Valeria spoke flatly. Taiyang couldn't help but stifle a snort when Ruby blushed a red to match her cloak. "I have a tight schedule before Serana will demand that I return to my own quarters for a medical scan. So, Mr. Xiao Long, shall we proceed?"

With a wave of her hand, Weiss conjured a portal that led straight into her quarters. The group walked through, with Taiyang looking around in amazement at the various unfamiliar instruments on display. There were funny-looking pieces of glassware that he recognised as being part of an Alchemy set sitting in display cabinets; a silver staff with a gigantic green crystal sitting on a footlocker at the foot of a bed, surrounded by gleaming crystals of various shapes and sizes; and an entire cabinet filled with potions in all the colours of the rainbow. And sitting on the bed itself was-

"Summer?" he breathed out, taking a step forward.

That was unmistakably his wife. Dark brown hair, with crimson tips; a little on the short side, just like Ruby. She was even wearing the same white cloak that she had worn twenty years ago – and a long time before then!

But as she turned to face him, he noticed something rather different. Her skin was pale before, even as a huntress; but now, it was as white as new-fallen snow. Her lips looked redder, and she looked as though she hadn't aged at all from last time he had seen her. And were those...fangs? Just barely visible beneath her upper lips? When the woman opened her eyes, however, he had to take a step back.

Her eyes. They were golden. Her irises were a bright, burning gold.

"Hello, Tai. I've missed you," she spoke softly, standing up.

"Summer? Is...is that really you?"

"Well, obviously!" she pouted, "I spent four years getting poked and prodded, and the first thing that you say is that you don't think that I'm...myself?"

"But...how? How is this even possible? I was there when you were buried!" Taiyang exclaimed.

"A necromantic ritual involving some blood rites," Valeria nearly spat, distaste evident in her scowl, "By your reaction, I assume that Miss Rose has kept her promise to myself to keep this quiet,"

Taiyang whipped around to glare at the tall khajiit. "Why would you even—she's my wife! I loved her! You brought her back-"

"Silence!" thundered Valeria, her eyes flashing dangerously. "I have my reasons, Mr. Xiao Long, some of which even other Archmages are not privy to. I will simply say that necromantic rituals are, and will always be, illegal; and for good reason, I might add. Ruby has sacrificed a finger to serve as the flesh component of a resurrection ritual-"

"You said it was from an accident while sharpening Crescent Rose," Taiyang growled towards Ruby, who rubbed her head sheepishly.

"-and the blood component was provided by myself. Are you aware of what I am, Mr. Xiao Long?"

"A really tall cat-woman that likes throwing fireballs around?"

"I will not dispute the truth of that statement, but there is more to it. I am a pure-blooded vampire, turned by Molag Bal himself. As it turns out, my blood proved to be potent enough to alter the resurrection ritual. Had a normal man or mer led the ritual using untainted blood, your wife would have returned as a normal human. However, the usage of pure vampiric blood has proven...problematic,"

Taiyang remained silent for a moment. He had a feeling about what problems she was talking about. After all, he could see that there were definitely fangs poking out from under Summer's upper lips. Remnant had legends about bloodsucking Grimm, but never in his wildest dreams did he imagine them to be _real_!

"Your wife," Valeria calmly said, "Was brought back as a partial vampire. She will need to drink blood to remain healthy, though far less in quantity and frequency than full vampires. Her skin will be sensitive to both heat and sunlight, and extended exposure to either may prove to be rather painful,"

"Great. So no more days out on the beach?"

"There is sunscreen for a reason, Tai," Summer muttered, blushing, "I remember that you used to like to help me wear it,"

"Yes. A sunscreen lotion will work well enough, which is fortunate. But what is most unfortunate is her lifespan. She, like the rest of vampires like myself, are...functionally immortal,"

Taiyang blinked. "How is that a bad thing?"

Valeria strolled towards Ruby and Weiss and pulled them close. She rubbed her forehead against Ruby's, and then against Weiss'. "Another perspective may help. You have experienced loss, and you have experienced grief, have you not? Then consider the fact that while the child of two pure-blooded vampires is another pure-blooded vampire, with all the boons and frailties that it brings, and that the child of a pure-blooded vampire and a mortal is only a partial vampire. From records that I have kept, anything less than a half-vampire will no longer inherit their vampiric parent's immortality. Do you know what this means, Mr. Xiao Long?"

He shook his head.

"It means eternal loneliness. I may live forever. Your wife may live forever. But she will inevitably outlive her children, and her grandchildren, and her great-grandchildren, until she fades into obscurity, and is eventually forgotten by all her descendants until the end of time. Mortals seem to think that immortality is a boon, while in reality it is a sentence to condemn oneself to an eternally lonely existence. We inevitably outlive our children. Our families. Our friends and our peers," Valeria said sadly. "Now, I have spoken for long enough, and if I spend any longer here, my wife will definitely force me to sleep in the smallest coffin she could find. I shall leave you to your devices, then. I assume that you both have twenty years worth of love to rediscover,"

And with that, the ancient vampire whipped around on the spot and vanished with a thunderclap and a puff of purple smoke.

"Twenty years of love to rediscover?" Taiyang muttered, "What did she mean by that?"

"Oh, I got that, don't you worry. I guess we'd better get started, then, unless you want to spend another twenty years figuring it out," Summer murmured, a coy smirk on her face, "Come here, you~"

Summer walked up to Taiyang, throwing her arms around her husband and giving him a brief kiss on the cheek. The man, still dumbfounded by the fact that his dead wife was now alive again – and embracing him, no less – didn't respond with anything more than an incoherent stammer. "Well, Ruby, I think I broke him," she sang, "Poor Tai. Did Yang break your confidence? You were so full of life and—eep!"

Taiyang had shaken himself out of his stupor and shoved Summer back on to the bed, with a predatory grin on his face.

He was Taiyang Xiao Long. The Great Sun Dragon of the Xiao Long family, and bringer of happiness and warmth to all the pretty young women of Beacon in his days as a student. And he would be damned if he left his wife an eternity to live without remembering the special warmth that he brought to the world. Dust, the changes to Summer weren't even unwelcome. Sure, it was strange to feel skin that was cool to the touch, and seeing her lick her fangs a little every time she licked her lips was a bit odd. But those eyes, whether the silver ones of twenty years back, or the golden ones of the present, were still those of the woman he loved.

"A little eager, aren't we?" Summer said in a sultry tone, eliciting gagging noises from both Ruby and Weiss.

"Ewww! Dad! Mum! That's our bed you're on!" whimpered Ruby, while a slack-jawed Weiss was desperately trying to remember a spell to banish the two lovebirds back to Patch – and failing spectacularly at it.

* * *

A/N

CRANK UP DA FLOOF!


	40. Extra 5: End of the War to End All Wars

Ruby was completely and utterly exhausted by the time that she arrived home in Vale. She had just been on a mission to Kynareth's Bounty to remove an infestation of some gigantic eight-legged wildlife. Wildlife with far too many eyes to be comfortable around, and spins enough webbing to thoroughly tangle her hair in sticky strings.

Ordinarily, she would have turned down such a mission or given it to another member of the Fighters' Guild that was present on that planet. But the farming consortium on that planet had insisted that they had asked for assistance before, to no avail; and when Ruby checked the guildmember rosters, every last one of the Guild members there had been booked solid for the next two months.

And for good reason. With the Reaper War having concluded just two weeks ago, the Legion's ranks were severely depleted. Ruby frowned as she recalled when the hastily-formed Remnant First Legion was drafted in to fight for the Empire. No, for the right of the entire _galaxy_ to survive. Men and women, young and old; man, elf, beastfolk or faunus, they were all conscripted into the Legion. Almost a third of the population of the Empire had been pressed into the military to fight for all that was right. Those who were able to fight were directed to the front lines; teenaged boys and girls, barely old enough to join a Huntsman Academy (or the Fighters' Guild) were sent to assist with scouting, being small enough and fast enough to sneak around where adults could not. Old veterans of previous wars were recalled to service, performing police duties so that more able-bodied troops could be sent forward. Ruby and Weiss, being the heads of Remnant's local chapters of the Fighters' Guild and the Mages' Guild respectively, had thankfully been spared from the call to arms.

Of those that went, however, only a very small fraction of them ever returned. Many of them glassy-eyed and twitchy, having seen things that no living person should ever have to see. They were, of course, only still trickling in. From what rumours she had heard, the destruction of the Reapers had caused the Mass Relays – the devices enabling faster-than-light travel across the galaxy – to simultaneously explode.

At first Ruby scoffed at the news, thinking that it was some sort of elaborate joke played by those coming back. But when the Elder Council and the Imperial Senate announced that Valeria would be absent for the better part of the next five years to fix galactic traffic issues, it was clear that was certainly not the case.

Empress-Consort Serana Volkihar-Septim would be acting regent during this time, and _that_ declaration drew some raised eyebrows from everyone that had heard the news on Remnant.

That alone meant that _something_ serious had really happened out there to those Relays, at least, and Valeria was forced for the time being to help repair the damage. Or, more likely, create an alternative, as Ruby knew just how technologically inept she actually was when it came to anything that wasn't possible to manipulate through magicka.

"Auntie Ruby!" squealed numerous high-pitched voices, followed by the stamping of dozens of tiny feet. A horde of little children tumbled out of a side room, with a few attendants hurriedly chasing after them. She smiled and knelt down, before they all bowled her over with hugs.

Almost all of them were children whose parents had been conscripted into the Legion. Khajiit, elf, man, or faunus, there was at least one of each in the gaggle of tiny children. After Valeria had left the Imperial City to coordinate the Legion's effort, Serana had invoked an ancient law to ensure that the children of those who fought would be looked after. Namely, communal upbringing, as invoked after the Oblivion Crisis. Ruby was only too happy to collect as many as Weiss would allow her to.

"Ysmir, you've gotten a lot bigger since I've last seen you. And Gortwog, you haven't been taking too many cookies out of my cookie jar, have you...?" she cooed, giving the children in question a gentle rub on their head. "J'Rakha, have you been minding these two?"

"This one has been making sure they haven't been in trouble..." purred the giant Khajiit kitten with a wry grin. No sooner had Ruby returned that smile with her own, the Khajiit added, "...too much,"

Ruby's smile gave way to a horror. "They didn't smash any of Auntie Weiss' expensive glassware, did they?"

"No. But this one must admit that the cookie jar is...empty,"

Empty. Cookie jar. Ruby's brain immediately froze. "Empty? EMPTY!?" she yelped loudly, jumping up and zooming off to the kitchen. Sure enough, there was the porcelain cookie jar, crumbs scattered all over the tabletop in front of it. She picked it up and upended it, causing a single ant carrying the last crumbs to fall out. "Nooooo! I waited all week for this moment. Goodbye, my delicious treats..."

"Look what you did, you made Auntie Ruby sad," chimed one of them, echoed by a chorus of agreements from the rest of the kids. Knowing that Gortwog had a temper almost matching Yang's own, Ruby quickly looked up and forced a smile to her lips. Breaking up a fight between kids was definitely not high on her list of things to do that day.

"That's uh...okay...I guess I can always make some more," she sniffed, glancing around to see if there were supplies still left over. A frost-enchanted rack still had several blocks of butter on it. A bag of sugar sat in the corner of the walk-in pantry, and she was certain that the carton of eggs on the marble countertop still had an egg or two in it. "Yeah. I'll make some more. Anyone want to help me?"

"Ooh, me!" a little cat Faunus girl cried out, waving a hand in the air. Several others also waved their hands in the air, bouncing up and down on the balls of their feet as they tried to get Ruby's attention.

"Alright, alright. Sable, you can help me today. And...uh...geez, that's too many of you. Alright, J'Rakha, could you take the others down to the living room? I'll get this batch of cookies done in no time. You can all have one,"

"But this one wanted to help today," J'Rakha whined, her ears drooping.

"You can have a moonsugar biscuit if you'll be a good girl and keep the others out of trouble-"

No sooner had Ruby mentioned the moonsugar biscuit than J'Rakha jumped up and began to herd the protesting horde of little kids to the living room. Well, all except the cat Faunus girl that she had singled out before.

"Well, that never fails," giggled Ruby.

"But you're like that when Auntie Weiss holds up a cookie too," Sable pointed out with a cheeky grin on her face.

"I guess I do, don't I?" Ruby replied, blushing slightly. She picked up the little girl and put her up on a barstool near the counter. "Okay. So let's get started. I need you to measure out three cups of sugar and three cups of flour. I'm going to beat the eggs while you do that,"

"Okay,"

Ruby used her Semblance to beat the eggs very, very quickly to a white foam, while Sable reached into the bag of sugar with a measuring cup. "And here's the flour," Ruby called out, sliding the bag of flour across the countertop where her tiny assistant could catch it. Between the two of them, the cookie dough was mixed in just a few minutes and was quickly cut to circles and placed on a tray.

"You did really well, Sable," Ruby praised the little cat Faunus, noting happily how little sugar and flour she had spilled. Tapping her finger on her chin, however, Ruby muttered, "It's still missing something, though,"

"Chocolate!" Sable cried out happily, waving a bag of chocolate chips that had seemingly appeared out of nowhere.

Ruby gasped, her eyes wide. The very first thing that Weiss had done when they had moved into their home was to put an enchantment on the front door that would literally erase chocolate from existence if someone attempted to bring some through. And so far, she had not been able to find any way of getting around it. Magic resistant boxes, hidden pockets, lead crates, steel capsules. She had even tried bribing one of Weiss' apprentices to try and bring some through under the guise of alchemical ingredients. Not a single method worked; the chocolate simply vanished the moment it even so much as moved an inch past the doorway.

"H-how?" stammered Ruby, reaching into the bag of chocolate and taking a chocolate chip. She looked at it under the light; it was definitely the normal rich, glossy dark brown that she normally associated with high-quality chocolate. A tentative lick, and she let out a truly blissful moan. It had been _months_ since she had even gotten her hands on any chocolate. The fact that this was some truly delicious chocolate – perfectly tempered, with an even, crisp snap, smooth texture and taste-

"Auntie Ruby, you're going to finish the whole bag," Sable pouted, pulling the bag away from Ruby. One lick had turned into two, and she had shovelled an entire fistful into her mouth before she realised what had happened.

"Ahem,"

Ruby paled as she heard that voice.

There was Weiss in the threshold of the kitchen with a disappointed scowl on her face. Her eyes were locked on Ruby's chocolate-stained fingers – and then to a decidedly guilty Sable, who tried vainly to hide the bag of chocolate chips.

"Um...sorry?"

"A 'sorry' isn't going to work," Weiss snarled, marching up to Ruby and plucking a chocolate chip stuck to her cheek. "You've arrived home for the first time in a week, and the first thing you do is to...bake some cookies? Have you no idea how worried I was, when you didn't write or call me for the whole time?"

"Wait, so you're not mad about the chocolate?"

If it was even possible, Weiss' thin lips grew even thinner. She gave Sable an apologetic glance before seizing Ruby by her ear and dragging her out of the kitchen, ranting about priorities all the while.

"Auntie Weiss is scary when she's upset," muttered Sable. The little cat Faunus jumped when she heard the oven beep loudly; she scurried off and opened it, sliding in the tray of unbaked cookies. No sooner had she done that than she heard a loud _whump_ from somewhere inside the kitchen, and the faint sound of rushing air coming past her ears. A portal!

"Well, that was certainly amusing!" cackled an raspy voice. "Who would have thought that chocolate would have made for such a fine prank? Wait – that would be...ME!"

Sable's ears pricked up, and her eyes lit up with glee. She spun around and leapt into the waiting arms of an gigantic white Khajiit, who was all too familiar to the little cat faunus.

"Auntie Ra'shamarra!" Sable cried out happily as the ancient Khajiit purred and nuzzled into the crook of her neck. "Is mum back yet? You keep saying that she'll be back, but she's not back yet,"

"Well, my miserly daughter did say that your mother had to wait her turn when it came to coming back home. Which was to say, her position in the queue was...something in the high billions?" replied Ra'shamarra, setting Sable down. "But I say, to Oblivion with that! Quite literally, I might add. Your mother's in _my_ realm, getting an express ticket back home. As is your other mother!"

"So they're back!?"

"It really depends on what you mean by that, little munchkin. Malacath would be proud of the ashpit that the other humans called Earth. And I say that neither of your parents are Malacath's followers! So I took them back from there,"

"Auntie..."

"Oh, don't give me that kicked puppy look. Yes, yes, your parents are back,"

"Really? But...where are they?"

"Right here, sweetheart," Blake murmured exhaustedly, limping in through the same portal that Ra'shamarra had used. Yang walked in closely behind her, steadying her wife as the two walked into Ruby and Weiss' kitchen. Sable cried out in delight and zoomed past Ra'shamarra, very nearly knocking Blake off her feet when the little cat faunus tackled her around the midriff. "Wow. You really have grown since I last saw you,"

Sable simply purred contentedly in response.

"Has Ruby been taking good care of you? And Weiss?"

Another purr.

"Good to know. Uh...why do I smell cookies on you? Don't tell me that Ruby's been...feeding you...cookies..."

"Mmmph! Cookies are tasty. Cookies and milk too!" replied Sable.

Blake's jaw dropped in horror. "You mean she actually only fed you cookies?!"

"Yep!"

Blake's horrified expression grew. "For the last six years?!"

"...But Auntie Weiss makes me eat my veggies,"

She let out a sigh of relief.

"Okay. Okay. That's better. I'll have to thank Weiss later,"

Yang, unable to contain herself any longer, broke into giggles and ruffled Sable's hair. "Now that's just cruel. You know mummy likes eating healthy things. Like fish!"

Which was, apparently, the wrong thing to say, as the three feline females in the room immediately turned to face her, drooling. "Fish!?" all three of them exclaimed, stars in their eyes. Blake's stomach rumbled loudly – and so did Sable's, followed by a truly earth-shaking tremor from Ra'shamarra. "You're paying, right?" Blake grinned, licking her lips.

Yang reached into her pockets – and pulled up wads of lint. "Yeah. Sure, if we're going to a place that accepts dust as payment," she groaned, "Come to think of it, we haven't collected our pay, have we?"

Blake shook her head. "Well, maybe we could borrow some money from Weiss or Ruby for the time being," she suggested, eyeing the tray of cookies in the oven longingly, "Ohh, that really smells delicious now,"

"Careful now, Ruby might get jealous if she heard that," chuckled Yang.

"I'll take that risk. I mean, when was the last time we even had _cooked_ food? I can't remember what anything tastes like except...tasteless protein paste,"

"Good point. Sable, where's Auntie Ruby? Or Auntie Weiss? Could you get them for us?"

The little child nodded and scurried out of the kitchen to find Ruby and Weiss. "Well now. If a grilled fish isn't going to come around anytime soon, I think I'm going to be mad. And I'm a madgod! You really don't want to see what a madgod does when she's mad," exclaimed Ra'shamarra. "Or maybe you do. Do you?"

"I think we see that all the time. But can't you just summon some fish in your palace? I mean, you've got all those servants running around..."

"How inspired! Ordering my servants to do the deed? Perhaps I might just do that,"

And with that, the madgod disappeared with a thunderous crack and a puff of purple smoke. The portal likewise vanished, leaving the black and yellow couple behind in the kitchen.

Blake took in her surroundings. The kitchen was as spotless as she recalled it to be; everything in the right place, everything neatly stored away in sealed jars and boxes. Nothing was broken. Nothing was ruined. Everything looked perfectly normal. No nooks and crannies for enemies to hide in – Grimm, human, Reaper or otherwise. No holes in walls and ceilings to let artillery fire rain down on them, or for snipers to shoot through.

"A septim for your thoughts, kittycat?" Yang murmured, wrapping her arms around Blake and nibbling on her earlobe. Blake purred in contentment, melting into Yang's embrace.

"Right now? It's just...relief,"

"Relief? That's it?"

"I still can't believe we made it back in one piece," Blake sighed. "I mean, sure, I've got a break in my leg that's still healing, but that's better than everyone else. Nora, Ren, Pyrrha and Jaune...I wonder how they're doing? I didn't see them when we made our attack on Earth. What if they got shot? What if they didn't make it? What if-"

She was silenced by warm lips upon her own.

"Shh. I'm sure they're fine. Leave the worrying to the Ice Queen," Yang said, waving her off.

Blake nodded slowly, smiling at Yang's positive outlook even after everything that had happened. They survived a war that engulfed an entire galaxy. They made it through mostly unscathed, even when billions of others died on the battlefields. Now peace reigned throughout a united galaxy, and for the first time in years, Blake could finally settle down and enjoy some time with her friends and family.

And her child – no, _their_ child. A happy and healthy girl that she could raise with her partner and wife. On a planet free from Grimm, in a galaxy free from the threat of annihilation. That was all that she could have ever asked for.

* * *

A/N:

Just a little something to tie up Blake and Yang's storyline now. Not much to say here.


End file.
